Better Days

NATASHA POV:

Everything was going well with the team until Steve asked to talk to me. I had told him earlier that I didn't want Wanda to hear the briefing because I didn't want her to get nightmares. The mission was also confidential so that wouldn't be a problem. 

"Alright," Steve announced after we finished a round of Scrabble. "I need to talk to her about the mission so everyone out." Everyone but Wanda obediently left the room. Wanda stayed by my side not seeming to even think about moving. "Wanda," Steve warned her gently. "Natasha and I need to talk privately for a few minutes. You can come back as soon as the mission report is done."

"I'm not leaving Nat," she responded confidently as she grabbed my arm. 

"Sweetie, I'll be okay," I told her. "I just have to give a statement about what happened and then you can come back."

"I'll be quiet," she tried to convince us. 

Before I could say anything, Steve was already talking, "I need to talk to her alone. You weren't on the mission so we can't have you listening to details until the mission becomes public knowledge." This was partially true but I know that Steve was also trying to carry out my wishes about the nightmare thing. 

"Please," Wanda breathed out with tears in her eyes.

It broke my heart to make her leave but I said, "Just a few minutes baby." She didn't move at all and instead moved a tiny bit closer to me so I looked at Steve, signaling that he could step in. Steve started to approach her and I said, "I love you so much honey, I'll see you in a few minutes," as Steve grabbed her arm to lead her to the door. 

She fought and pulled out of his grasp, throwing herself into my arms. I gasped as she grabbed me, her body slamming into my abdomen, causing pain to shoot through my stomach and ribs. She was crying into my shoulder as she held onto me. I felt absolutely terrible as Steve picked her up and carried her out while she struggled and cried. My heart broke as she cried for me as she was carried out of the room and down the hallway. 

I knew that the rest of the family would take care of her until she could come back to me but that didn't stop me from feeling like the worst mom ever. Mom? It felt so natural that I barely noticed the word slip into my thoughts. I still thought about it though because although I felt that way, it definitely didn't mean that Wanda felt the same. 

Steve re-entered the room without Wanda. "Where's Wanda?" I asked, wanting to make sure that she was safe. 

"She's with Clint, she'll be fine." Hearing that she was with Clint calmed me down a little bit but I still felt bad. 

"Well let's get this over with," I huffed. Steve asked me questions about what happened, what I could remember, and if there were any specific details that could prove helpful to them. I told him everything I remembered from being knocked out and drugged, to being beat, to losing consciousness again, to waking up in the compound. 

He jotted down important notes from my statement and then had FRIDAY insert the recording of my statement into the mission report. I thought we were done and I was looking forward to getting back to Wanda when Steve turned to me and asked, "How are you? Like really, you don't have to sugar-coat it."

I sighed but answered him truthfully, "I feel like shit. I'll be fine but that doesn't mean that I'm not in pain. I'm sorry I wasn't more helpful during the mission."

"Nat, it wasn't your fault. There were too many of them, we should've brought more assistance but we thought it would be easy. We are still trying to figure out more details about how everything turned out how it did but it was never your fault. I'm sorry I didn't pay more attention and realize you were missing earlier."

"If it's not my fault then it's not your fault," I told him. "Now can we get everyone back in here?" I laughed to lighten the mood. 

"FRIDAY," Steve told the ceiling, "Can you notify everyone that we are done and that they can come in?"

"Of course Mr. Rogers," FRIDAY responded and within a minute, everyone was walking back into the room. 

Clint was holding onto Wanda's arm lightly but let her go once she walked into the room. Wanda still had tears streaming down her face and she looked miserable as she walked to the bed. She very carefully crawled in next to me and buried her head into my shoulder, sobbing. 

"Don't make me leave Nat!" she cried as I stroked her hair, trying to calm her down. 

"It's okay baby, I'm sorry we made you leave. You're okay, I've got you," I told her. Everyone in the room was looking at me with worried expressions and looking at Wanda with pitying or sad expressions. 

"Separation anxiety," Clint mouthed to me and I nodded, holding onto Wanda a little bit tighter.

She calmed down and pulled away while mumbling, "Sorry." 

"It's okay baby," I told her, gently wiping away some of the remaining tears. She turned red as she looked to everyone else in the room but no one said anything so she slowly and carefully laid down next to me. 

Everyone was playing uno but Wanda, she chose to instead watch us play while she laid her head on my shoulder. 

We all watched a movie and ate some food but Wanda still didn't move from my shoulder, only barely shifting to eat. It was getting late when Wanda turned to me. "Are you gonna make me go to my room to sleep?" She looked terrified of my answer so I chose my words carefully. 

"No, you can go if you want or you can sleep in here. Whatever makes you most comfortable." I was going to make her go to her room to sleep earlier because her bed was much more comfortable than the hospital room but after watching her meltdown from earlier, I wasn't sure that going to her room was going to help her to sleep any better. 

"I wanna stay with you," she told me quietly and I told her that was fine as I kissed her temple, pulling her closer to me as the team turned on a movie. 

By the time the movie was over, Wanda was already asleep on my shoulder. "Do you want me to move her?" Clint asked quietly as the team started cleaning up the room before bed. 

"Sure, just to the couch though," I whispered. I knew that if Wanda stayed next to me, I would wake up in a lot more pain. I would gladly do that for her but I knew that I needed to feel fine in order to take care of her and the couch wasn't far. 

Clint carefully lifted her up. She whined as she tried to hold onto me in her sleep but she quickly quieted down when Clint rocked her gently. He walked her across the room and gently set her down on the couch, moving the pillows and blankets to make her comfortable. 

The team all said their good nights as they filed out of the room, all heading up to their own rooms. "Are you sure you don't want me to stay?" Clint asked once we were the only two adults in the room. 

"I'm sure, we'll be fine. If anything, I'll ask FRIDAY to get you," I told him. 

"You better, I'll be out in the lounge on this floor."

"Clint, go to your own room and sleep. A bed is going to be much more comfortable then the couches out there," I tried to convince him. 

"Nope, it's either I stay out there or I stay in this room. Which one do you want?"

"Out there," I grumbled as I shifted. My side was killing me. At least out there he wouldn't wake up when Wanda inevitably has a nightmare. 

"That's what I thought. Alright, goodnight Nat. Sleep well and call me if you need absolutely anything, okay?"

"Okay. Goodnight," I told him and he left the room. I had no idea how I would take care of Wanda when she woke up with a nightmare. I couldn't exactly lift her without causing damage. Hopefully she would be able to sleep well but the chances of that were extremely slim. I guess I'll deal with it if and when I have to. 

I closed my eyes and slowly drifted off to sleep.  

o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o

I woke up to whimpering coming from inside of the room. The room was pitch black and it immediately reminded me of the time that I found Wanda, wrists slit, laying in the hospital bed, bleeding out. 

I quickly shook the vision out of my head as the whimpering grew louder. "FRIDAY, turn the lights on to 20% please," I asked FRIDAY, trying to see what was going on. Wanda was still on the couch, wrapped up in the duvet, with tears streaming down her face. The pain in my abdomen was the worse it had been, maybe I should've taken medication earlier.

I carefully but quickly got out of bed and disconnected my IV, pressing buttons on the pump to make it stop beeping. I rushed over to Wanda, ignoring the pain in my ribs and my broken leg. 

"Wanda baby, wake up," I shook her gently. She continued to whimper and her fists started flying. I was surprised that she wasn't using her powers and I was a little confused as to how she got her arms out from under the blanket so quickly but what mattered was that her hands were fighting some invisible thing that only she could see. I grabbed her arms and pinned them down, continuing to try to wake her up. 

This only made her scream as she fought even harder, her powers finally floating out of her hands. The red tendrils wrapped around my abdomen and threw me back. I slammed into the bed and I had to bite my tongue to hold back a scream as I felt my ribs shift inside of me. 

The noise was enough to signal Clint who came running into the door, looking for the source of the sound. "What are you doing out of bed?" he questioned angrily as he walked over to me. He must've seen the look of pain on my face because he asked, "Are you okay?" his tone becoming slightly more gentle. 

"Wanda," I grit out, trying to breathe through the pain in my chest and abdomen. He turned and quickly went over to Wanda, shaking her and trying to get her to wake up. 

I wanted so bad to be near her to help her but I physically couldn't get up so I was stuck on the floor, watching as Clint tried to wake her. 

He finally succeeded and she shot up, sobbing and gasping for air. "Tasha!" she cried and Clint glanced back at me before pulling her into a hug. "Where's Tasha? Nat!" she sobbed.

I used the bed to pull myself up as I walked over to her, replacing Clint and pulling her into a hug. She cried into my shoulder as she gripped onto my gown and hair. She wasn't gripping hard, more of just enough to keep me attached to her. 

My ribs felt like they were stabbing me but I ignored it as I pulled Wanda into my lap so that I could gently rock her. It always seemed to calm her down. I looked up to see Clint looking at us worriedly. 

"She's fine," I mouthed. 

"And how about you?" he mouthed back and I realized that I had projected my pain on my face more than I had wanted to. 

I was about to tell him that I was fine when I realized that I wasn't. I needed meds in order to take care of the crying Wanda. "Ribs hurt like crazy. Can you get me some meds?" He nodded and then left the room, leaving me alone to deal with Wanda. 

I switched to comforting her with words instead of actions, "I'm here baby, I've got you. Shh, shh. It was just a dream, you're okay. I love you so much, shh," I repeated as I rubbed her back. 

Clint came back with a syringe and I offered him my arm so that he could give me the medication through my IV. I was still holding Wanda and she whined when I moved my arm. "I'm not going anywhere baby, just shifting a bit. Hold on," I told her while I got my meds, then I moved my hand back to her head to play with her hair. 

She calmed down but didn't move from my shoulder, instead moving her hands to hold around my shoulders, resting on my back. "Do you want to talk about your dream?" I asked, gently pushing some hair out of her face. She shook her head. "You sure?" I asked. A nod this time. I wasn't going to get anything out of her right now so I just leaned back and let her lay on my chest. 

Clint was still in the room, sitting in one of the chairs. My ribs still hurt but it was more of an ache now instead of a sharp, shooting pain and I could deal with an ache. 

Wanda actually fell asleep remarkably quickly once she had calmed down. I expected her to fight with me about sleeping and stay awake all night so I was surprised when she fell asleep so quickly. 

"She asleep?" Clint asked after a while of sitting in silence. I nodded. "How are your ribs?" 

"Better. Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you." 

"It's really not a problem, that's why I was on this floor. In case something like this happened."

"You thought that Wanda was going to throw me into a bed?" I questioned sarcastically. 

"I thought that Wanda was going to have a nightmare and I knew that you were not in the right condition to handle it," he stated. 

"I can take care of my kid!" I snapped. 

"Your kid huh?" he smiled. We fell into silence after that, me rocking Wanda and Clint just sitting there. "Are you ready for bed?" he asked me after awhile. 

"I'm fine, Wanda's asleep and that's all that matters," I said. 

"You need sleep too. If you aren't healthy, then Wanda can't be healthy."

"Wanda needs to be with someone to sleep. She obviously didn't handle being alone on the couch well." I always slept next to her in the bed so I was able to get to her quicker than when I was halfway across the room in a hospital bed. 

"Then I will take her and you get some sleep," Clint tried to convince me. 

"What happens if she wakes up from another nightmare?"

"Then you can wake up and come take care of her but she probably won't wake up again."

"She can just lay with me in the bed," I suggested. "That way you can go get some sleep in the lounge."

"Then she'll hurt your ribs," Clint pointed out. 

"I'll be fine Barton, I'm not made of glass," I snapped. 

"I know Nat," he said gently. "Let me take her and you can get some sleep." He was already starting to gently grab her off of me. 

"Tasha," she whined in her sleep as Clint lifted her off of me. She started to whine once she was removed from my arms but Clint held her to his chest and she quickly calmed down. 

"See, she's fine," Clint said as he sat down on the couch next to me. "Go get some sleep. We won't leave this room," Clint assured me as I slowly got up and got back into the bed. 

Wanda was calmly sleeping in Clint's arms so hopefully we would be fine. I didn't want Wanda to get used to being held in order to sleep but for now, if that was what she needed, then that's what we'd give her. 

WANDA POV: 

Pepper and I were sitting in the kitchen, waiting for everyone to get home from the mission. We heard the jet landing outside and I ran out to see Tony walking out of the jet. 

Steve, Vision, and Rhodey all followed Tony out of the jet. "Where's Nat?" I asked from my spot on the lawn. 

"She's gone," Tony told me. I rushed into the jet to see Natasha's dead body laying on the floor. 

"No!" I shouted. "Tasha, come back!" I fell to my knees and started crying, burying my head in my hands. 

I felt a cold hand grab my wrist and I looked up to see Natasha's hand gripping onto me. I followed her arm to her body and then her body up to her face. There was blood pouring out of her mouth and her face looked like it was melting in a way. All of the skin was tearing, revealing the broken bones beneath. 

"You killed me," she rasped out. 

"What? No I didn't Nat! You're hurting me!" I looked down to see her peeling the skin off of my arm. "Natasha!" I shouted, trying to snap her out of it. 

She pulled my skin off to try to put on her face to cover all of the gaping holes that were caused from the melting of her skin. 

Her skin continued to melt until her skeleton was the only thing left. I quickly rushed back out of the jet to see the rest of the Avengers standing on the lawn, looking at me. 

"You killed her," Steve told me. 

I was crying and I looked down to see red coating my hands, blood. I tried to wipe it off of my hands but it seemed to be glued on, it wasn't moving. Tony, Pepper, Steve, Clint, Rhodey and Vision all walked towards me until they had me circled. 

Steve grabbed me and pulled me into the compound, shoving me into a closet. I cried and fumbled to try to find a light switch. 

Once I turned on the dim light I turned around to try to find a way out and was met with the dead and rotting bodies of Pietro, mother, papa, and Nat. They all grabbed onto me and tried to push me into a hole that had somehow formed in the ground of the closet. 

"No!" I yelled as I tried to fight against them. Their hands kept pushing me into the hole, now pinning my arms to the side. I couldn't move, it felt like my body was being bound by some kind of invisible rope. 

I remembered my powers as I was in the hole and used them to throw back everyone who was pushing me into the hole. I crawled back up the hole and got to the top where I saw Pietro and Nat, no one else. 

Pietro had bullet holes in his chest and was lying on the ground, no longer rotting and Nat was laying on a gurney, her red hair sprawled across the white sheets. A large red stain started forming on the front of the white blanket and I pulled it back to reveal a huge wound on Nat's stomach, causing her to bleed out. 

I put pressure on it and tried to stop the bleeding. It was working until someone's hands grabbed me from behind. I turned and saw Steve pulling me out of the closet, taking me further and further away from Nat. "I need to help Nat!" I yelled. 

I heard Tony say that Nat was dead and I shot up. 

"Tasha!" I cried, looking for her in the dim room. I felt myself getting pulled into a hug but I glanced up at the face and saw that it was Clint. Where was Nat? Was she really dead? "Where's Tasha? Nat!" I cried, desperate for her presence to reassure me that she was alive. 

I felt another set of arms on me and turned my head to see Nat. I launched myself into her arms instead, relieved that she was alive. I grabbed onto her gown and her hair. I played with her hair with my fingers to try to calm myself down and to reassure myself that she was really there.

Nat pulled me into her lap and rocked me back and forth while rubbing my back. I inhaled her scent of vanilla as I took deep breaths to try to calm down. I laid my head on her shoulder as I tried to fight my eyelids. For some reason, I was extremely tired and I felt safe in Nat's arms so I wasn't exactly scared to fall asleep as long as she was holding me. 

Nat gave me comforting words which helped me to calm down even faster, still holding onto Nat but shifting into a more comfortable position. I felt her arm move away from me and I panicked slightly. 

"I'm not going anywhere baby, just shifting a bit. Hold on," she told me and I calmed down. We sat there for a few more minutes before Nat asked the question I had been dreading, "Do you want to talk about your dream?" I shook my head and tried to pull myself closer to her. Her gentle hand moved a strand of hair out of my face before going back to rest on my head. "Are you sure?" she asked. I was positive. I did not want to relive my dream so I nodded. 

She leaned back a bit and I rested my head between her neck and shoulder as I let my eyes close, feeling completely safe in her arms. 

o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o

I felt myself being lifted up, away from Tasha and I panicked, waking up suddenly but not really being aware of my surroundings. I wanted Tasha. Was I dreaming again? I felt myself being pulled closer to a chest. It didn't smell like Tasha but I quickly recognized Clint's soothing voice. I still wanted Tasha and was trying to wake up but I felt sleep pulling me back in so I gave in, trusting Clint. 

NATASHA POV:

I didn't get much more sleep that night, instead opting to watch Wanda sleeping on Clint. I was beyond relieved that Clint was there to help take care of Wanda. I didn't know what I would have done without him. I bet Pepper, Steve and Tony would step in to help, along with the rest of the team, but I don't think Wanda was as close to them as she was Clint. 

Clint was the first one to really bond with her or even have a full conversation with the twins when they had switched to our side. Wanda trusted Clint and allowed him to take care of him after Pietro died. I slowly worked my way into her trust but I'm not sure if the others have fully made it there yet. 

Luckily, Wanda did not have another nightmare that night but when she woke up, she immediately moved out of Clint's arms and back into my bed, laying her head on my shoulder. 

"Are you ready for breakfast baby?" I asked her. She was lying sleepily next to me but I wanted her to eat before she did anything else. I don't think she has eaten a lot the past few hours and I didn't want her falling back into her dangerous eating habits. 

"No," she mumbled and I looked to Clint before looking back at her. 

"Can you try to eat a little something for me? I want to make sure that you aren't hungry," I pressed gently. 

"I'm not hungry. I don't want to eat." She was one level above a whisper. 

"Okay, we'll eat in a little bit." The team slowly started to enter the room as the time grew later, all of them carrying mugs of coffee or light breakfast, sitting around the room. Helen came in to check how my injuries were healing. 

"Can I get out of here soon?" I asked Helen as she finished wrapping up my incisions. 

"Soon. I would like to keep you here a few more days for observation but then you are free to go."

"I don't see why I can't go to my room," I argued. "It's right downstairs and I'm not going to run any marathons."

"Nat," Steve warned. 

"No, I don't need to be here. I'm really fine," I pushed myself up to prove my point, being careful of Wanda. 

Helen spoke up, "If you do well for the rest of today, then I can see about moving you back to your room, as long as you promise to take it easy."

I opened my mouth to respond but Clint beat me to it, "Oh she will. She won't be moving out of her bed until she is 100% healed." I scoffed and rolled my eyes as I lowered myself back on the bed. Clint knew that he would never win that argument and that I would be up and moving within the next few days if not the next few hours. 

Helen finished her job and left the room. "Okay, Wanda, you ready to eat now?" I asked her gently. It had been almost two hours since she had woken up and it was time for breakfast. She shook her head as she pressed herself further into my side. 

"Wanda, you need to eat," I told her, slightly firmer than earlier. Another shake of her head. "Wanda," I dropped my voice and whispered into her ear, "If you don't eat breakfast, the tube may be in your near future." I was mainly bluffing, I knew that there was going to be struggles with her eating, especially after a major event, like my injury. I wasn't just going to place a tube after every single struggle but I wanted her to be aware that the tube was still a serious risk if she fell back into her terrible eating habits. 

"No Nat," she whined. 

"If you eat, then there will be no tube. If you don't eat, well, you know the consequences." She pouted and I kissed her on the temple as I pulled her in closer to me. "I just want you to be safe."

"I'm not really hungry," she explained. 

"That's okay. You don't have to eat a lot, I just want you to try. How about some toast?" She nodded so I asked Clint to go make her a slice of buttered toast. 

Wanda ended up eating her toast just fine and was back to eating without complaints by the time lunch rolled around. She still refused to leave my bed though, making sure that she was always touching me. Breaking her from the separation anxiety was not going to be fun. 

The rest of the day was uneventful, mainly just more games and TV, waiting to be discharged. Helen allowed me to get ready to go back to my room later that evening and I was thrilled that I would no longer have to stay in the hospital bed. 

"I can walk," I argued with Clint and Steve as they tried to get me to ride in the wheelchair. 

"Nat, get in the wheelchair," Clint said sternly. I didn't understand why he was being so parental towards me, I was completely fine and he knew that I could kick his butt if I wanted too, even as injured as I was. I had to be careful with my broken leg but it was in a huge brace so that the swelling could go down so I was fine, I just couldn't put too much weight on it. I also had one crutch on the side that Wanda was not so that I could have assisted walking. 

"No," I got off of the bed and started walking down the hallway. I wasn't going to waste my time arguing with him. Wanda was gripping onto my sleeve as we walked through the hallways. It reminded me of a small child and their mother and I smiled at the thought, wrapping one arm around Wanda's waist to pull her closer to me. Tony had come in earlier that afternoon to fit Wanda for her boot so now she could walk around without crutches. 

Clint and Steve followed me down the hallway with the wheelchair, trying to convince me to sit down but I assured them I was fine as I made my way to my room. 

I made it to my room and announced that I would be taking a shower. Wanda still wasn't letting go of my sleeve so I looked at her after motioning for Clint to stay in the room in case we had another meltdown. 

"I'm going to take a shower real quick sweetie. You can stay in here or you can go to your room. I'll be there as soon as I'm done." Her eyes filled with tears but she let me go as she sat on the bed, taking deep breaths. It looked like she was trying not to have a panic attack. I knelt down in front of her to reassure her before I went into my bathroom. 

"Hey, I'll be super quick and then we can go watch TV or something, okay?" She nodded. "If you need anything, just call for me, okay? I'll be right in there." She managed to keep all of her tears at bay as I walked into the bathroom. Clint had sat down next to her to watch her while I was in the shower. 

Getting ready for the shower took a good five minutes. I had to take off all of my braces, remove the gauze and maneuver myself so that I could get into the shower without hurting my ribs or any of my broken bones. I turned the water on hot and relished in all of the grime and sweat getting washed off of my skin. I scrubbed gently around my incision sites even though they weren't supposed to get wet. I had kept them dry for most of the shower but I wanted to clean around them. 

By the time I had gotten out of the shower, re-wrapped my incisions, put back on all of the braces and got dressed, it had been about half an hour. I walked out of the bathroom to find my room empty so I made the short walk down the hallway to find Wanda crying softly, Clint rubbing her back. "Tasha will be back soon," he told her. 

Both of their heads snapped up when I walked into the room and Wanda got off of the bed, quickly coming and pulling me into a hug. I rubbed her back and looked at Clint questioningly. "I'll tell you later," he mouthed and I just nodded as I gently led Wanda over to the bed. 

"Are you okay honey?" She nodded and she had stopped crying but she was back to gripping my shirt. The separation anxiety was just going to get worse and worse but I couldn't find it in me to care as I comforted my girl.