Pride and Proposals
‘FRIDAY please announce the the entire 20 top floors of the tower at full volume GET UP LAZY BUTTHOLES WE GOT SHIT TO DO’ I giggle and cover my ears, Val hastily does the same.
At once the message glares out over the speakers at deafening volume quickly followed by 3 thuds I can tell are Thor, Bruce and Stark falling out of bed, two crashes-clint falling out of a vent and peter jumping on the ceiling, forgetting his own strength and smashing straight through to the above floor and 3 gunshots and the flick of 2 knives being thrown coming from Maria and Nat’s room.
Val looks at me-it’s the only time I’ve even see her properly terrified
‘we are gunna be killed by 3 assassins, a god, a billionaire and several scientist phenomenon’s’ she whispers as the door slams open
‘What the hell are you thinking I am going to strangle you both with each other’s heart strings…’ The red-headed murder twin trails off when she sees our outfits. Val is fully decked out in jeans with rainbow cuffs and a t-shirt that says ‘the world has bigger problems than girls who kiss girls and boys who kiss boys’ with a frantic (trust me, ive fought aliens) scribbled on as well, I am wearing black mom jeans and a bi coloured cropped shirt with demi-biromantic flags painted on each cheek. Nat turns around slowly to the calendar and then turns to us… something more dangerous than death threats-… fun?
‘is it what I think it is?’ she asks slowly turning back to us
‘THAT’S RIGHT NO 4’ Val screams
‘ITS RRIDE MONTH’ I yell and Nat grins
‘FRIDAY please announce to the entire tower that all Lesbians can please assemble in conference room B. this includes all interns, security staff and employees, please tell them they will not be judged but included and meet all the female avengers to plan Pride Pranks on men in general’ she inform the AI with a raised eyebrow
‘And all the Bisexuals’ I add quickly and Val rolls her eye’s at me. A smash is heard as Carol carrying Yelena bridal style flies through the huge glass windows
‘I heard there was something gay happening so I came as quickly as I could’ she pants, dropping lena on the floor, the door bangs open again and Maria walks in, kitted out in Black Widow pjs and one of the worst bed heads I have ever seen-except when Nat tried an afro for an undercover mission.
‘jesus tashie you have successfully managed to deafen half our staff and create at least 3 dents and 2 holes in the compound ceilings and floors’ she groans, rubbing her eyes and stealing her girlfriend’s coffee
Nat bows mockingly ‘right then gals-battle armour on. From this moment on we are at war with Men’ she announces, sourcing a knife from no-where and throwing it, with point-blank range at a framed picture of Cap A, Thor and Stark on the island.
‘vicious but I like it’ Val comments and we de-assemble, running off to our various rooms to get into outfits. Val puts on full armour and I pull on my silver and black catsuit, brushing through my hair and letting it loose around my shoulders
‘you look beautiful Elskan’ Val comments and kisses me, before turning into a Pegasus and kneeling to the floor, I laugh and climb onto her back, after pulling back the huge windows she beats her wings and we soar out the window dropping metres at a time before stopping and hovering outside the windows of conference room B. After 5 hours of planning we have got everything sorted and live stream the events of the day to the labs all across the tower.
First we dyed all our receptionists hair colours of the rainbow (some voluntarily, some by sneak) then, just as the 5 most important board members walked in a huge rainbow glitter bomb went off. But that wasn’t even the best thing.
As I went to sleep that night I could feel Natasha getting ready n the room next door, wearing the exact same outfit she had the night she recruited me. By morning she is back and the news is flooded by how someone managed to sneak past 5 sets of armed guards and scale a 100m building to replace the stars and stripes flag on top of the White House with a pride flag, which on closer inspection has been signed by each female Avenger and the majority of the staff of Stark Tower.
***
‘For Thor’s sake’ I scream scrumpling the piece of paper I was writing into a ball and throwing it into the 3rd explosion Val had just caused.
‘Gay Panic?’ Shuri questions looking up from the perch on the desk she has refused to leave since her arrival 8 hours ago
‘Gay Stress’ Val confirms, picking the piece of paper gingerly off the grey flames and making a note in her notebook ‘note to self; do not burn sulfuric acid with magnesium, carbon and hydraulic acid’ Shuri snorts
‘you seriously thought that would work? Did you not do the equations?’ she questions skipping a dreadful song and laughing at the brunettes confused face
‘I was… I was meant to do…. maths… sums… equations?’ she stutters looking desperately downhearted. I glare at Shuri before comforting my girlfriend
‘you can do whatever you want Cariad, and if that’s randomly mixing shit together and hoping it makes a big bang then do it, and try not to kill us all in the process’ I explain and brush the smoking pieces away quickly
‘But what is the cause for good old gay stress fiancé’ Shuri remarks, fiddling around with her holograms giggling
‘I well WE have been invited to speak at The Pride Event of the Month and what with Val being as flaky the baclava Nat makes when she’s angry the role has been thrown to me and Val is going to stand there like a lemon while I do the work’
‘an eagle or a wolf actually’ the girl in question coughs as she sets yet another thing on fire
‘Shall I initiate protocol Everything has gone to shit’ FRIDAY questions from above, making us all jump over the sound of our too-loud music
‘no’ I spin my spinney chair to Val slowly with a single eyebrow raised ‘when did you create that protocol Cariad’ I question, she blushes and FRIDAY answer quickly
‘After she set fire to her 76th object in 72 hours’ I laugh and Shuri looks dejected
‘YOU HAVE SET FIRE TO MY LAB OVER ONCE AN HOUR FOR THREE DAYS STRAIGHT’ she bellows Angry Wakandan Princess coming out in full effect.
‘nothing I do is straight’ Val deadpans but we just look at her with eyebrows raised
‘Back to Gay stress’ Val tries to get the blame off her ‘read out the bloody speech and we’ll mark it’ she chucks the ball of paper back to me I smooth it out and read in an over exaggerated British accent
‘hey, Im Iris Davids but you may know me as Red Dawn and bollocking bollocks I cannot fucking write a single fucking speech for the sake of shit’ I burn it with my dawn this time so it cannot be re-read.
***
That Saturday the compound is in chaos-or rather the female side of it is. Natasha and Maria are arguing over who gets the rainbow earrings, Yelena and Carol are laughing over their prosthetic veils-making them turn into each other and Red and Val are the only ones actually ready and waiting outside by the minivan borrowed from a father-of-6 security guard. Shuri and MJ turn up on time (wow-surprise!)
--------(0_0) timie skip cus imma lazy begger----------------
‘Ladies, Gentlemen and the rather fabulous individuals who do not fit into either category, hello! I am Iris Davids or Red Dawn and I am extremally privileged to be speaking to you today-now I’m going to keep it short, Ive had to sit through enough of Captain Americas speeches to know how boring long lectures are, but I just want to say.
If you are coming out, if you have; I see you. If you have reasons why you are not ready; I see you too. You are loved, you are supported, and I hope we can get to the space where-and I feel so proud to get to be myself-but I hope that one day it won’t be this big of a deal it will just be normal for people to be accepted as they are and you wont have to spend months or year stressing and questioning and worrying, that they wont have to be so scared ti say the few words that could change their life. That they will just bring someone home one night-a man, or a woman or a person and they wont be judged. But for now we are making steps on the right direction, and it is my delight and honor to reveal Val and I are not the only queer female Avengers’ at this the crowd goes wild and I grin as two woman walk on stage, Nat and Maria are in total disguise, wigs and prosthetic veils in place and I feel the energy in the crowd rise as I begin to introduce them
‘To my she is my супер мама, to one- Tashie, to some Natasha’ at this the crowd erupts, flags waving and voices cheering them selves horse. I hold up a hand for silence
‘To more- Agent Romanoff, but’ I look Nat straight into her unwavering emerald eyes
‘To the World she is Black Widow, Natalia Romanova’ Nat looks at me directly, slowly peeling back her prosthetic veil, voice switching from a robotic monotone to the snarky American accent I love
‘if sorry’ she says slowly, looking at me then to the crowd going wild cheering for her ‘did I step on your moment?’
I laugh and step aside, Val transform back into herself in a flash and the crowd cheers-if possible-louder, she laughs and pulls me off to the side where we stand partly out of view, watching Nat’s plan unfold
‘hello everyone’ she grins into the mic ‘I am The Black Widow and I would like to introduce you to a very special someone’ the red-head takes Marias hand and gently pully the veil away from her girlfriend’s face. The crowd goes wild.
‘Hey’ Ria mummers into the mic, shes not used to being in the spotlight or making speechs but lets her voice be heard regardless ‘I am Agent 79 of SHEILD, Commander Maria Hill. This amazing woman’s girlfriend’ she laughs and Nat takes the mic back, reaching into her pocket, I squeeze Vals hand; nervous for my mentor
‘I’d like to say a few words’ everyone quietens down as Nat speaks again. Then she gently lowers to one knee in front of Maria, pulling a small box out of her pocket and opening it gently. Ria’s hands fly to her mouth and a small squeal escapes her.
‘Maria Hill. This is usually the part where people say I have loved you since the moment I set eyes on you’ Natasha laughs and sneakily wipes away a tear
‘but I cant say that. When I saw you, in that interrogation room however many year ago I only saw the enemy, I only saw black and red. But you have helped me, you have shown me how to laugh, taught me to be merciful, shown me how to find my stars and navigate the huge voids of darkness between them. Thank you for always being by my side, through thick and thin, robots and armies. I love you Agent 79, so’ both woman are crying now and Natasha sniffs before asking quietly
‘will you make me the happiest person alive and become my wife?’
There is a moment of deafening silence before Maria speaks
‘yes, yes Tashie, yes I would love nothing more’ she whispers and Nat pushes the ring easily onto her finger
‘yessss’ I squeal way too loudly as they kiss and approximately 5,000 people cheer themselves hoarse for the girlfriends fiancés.
‘I love you’ Nat whispers in Marias hair then turns to the shadow where Val and I are lurking, by now I am thinking of combusting with excitement and Brunn turns to me, amused
‘go congratulate your supermum’ she laughs and I spin on my heels, sprinting on stage and enveloping Natasha in a bear hug
‘imsoproudofyouyoudiditohmythoryouaregettingmarriedaghhhh’ I gush to her laughs
‘я до сих пор не могу поверить, что сделал это’ she states as I pull back, grinning like a toddler
‘ты женишься’ I confirm
‘я выхожу замуж!’ she squeaks, by now Val has joined us on stage and is examining the ring
‘hey is that the cross section of a gun barrel?’ she asks, looking at the black band the diamond is set on, Nat turns red and I raise a cryptic eyebrow
‘I…urm’ she stutters ‘I had it made out of the first gun you gave me, the first one I was allowed after de-programming, when you first told me your real name-up until then you’d only been Agent 79’ she turns to Ria
‘I remember that’ she smiles softly ‘I love it so much, I love you so much!’ and they kiss again, Brunn and I step back and as we sneak off stage she takes my hand and squeezes it
‘we’re next Elskan’ Valkyrie whispers