Kisses and Cuddles

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Kisses and Cuddles
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Note
The first part of this story is Bucky's dream/flashback about being in the baby headspace with Rumlow and it contains sexual abuse.I use simple language when I write from Bucky's point of view because he is in the baby headspace and that is how he thinks.I keep thinking something about this doesn't make sense when I read over it but can't put my finger on what exactly. So I hope you guys like it but if you can figure out something wrong with it let me know because it's bugging me

The stuffed animal Steve gives to Bucky is  Kittybaby the cat. It is made by ty (the same company that makes beanie babies which everyone was obsessed with in the 90s). It is a soft stuffed animal meant for babies and it has a rattle inside.


"Baby? What are you doing?" Daddy asked, walking into the room.

 "Pitcher, daddy!" The baby replied excitedly. 

 "Oh? Are you drawing me a picture? What a good baby. Let me see it." Daddy said.

 The baby held up his crayon drawing for daddy to see. Crude, childlike scribbles covered the page.

 "Me and daddy!" The baby said, grinning.

 "Oh wow, I really like it baby. You did such a good job. We're gonna have to have extra kisses and cuddles tonight as your reward, aren't we?" Says daddy.

 The baby nods.

 "Maybe we can have some kisses and cuddles now. After I change your diaper. Why didn't you tell me you were wet?" Daddy asks. 

 The baby looks down to see. He isn't wearing any pants, just a shirt and the diaper, which is visibly swollen and sagging. He didn't even realize he was wet.

 "Not know." The baby says.

 "You didn't know?" Daddy asks. 

 The baby shakes his head no.

 "That's okay." Says daddy. "Maybe I should just check more often, huh?"

 He takes the baby's hand to guide him over to the couch. He changes the wet diaper and lays down on the couch with him.

 The baby squeals with delight as daddy peppers quick kisses all over his face, then trailing the kisses all the way down, kisses on his neck, kisses on his chest, kisses on his tummy, kisses on the front of his diaper. Daddy always kisses there the longest. Then daddy comes back up and kisses him on the mouth.

 "Your turn!" Daddy says.

 The baby tries to copy daddy, kissing daddy all over his face and kissing all the way down until he kisses the front of daddy's pants. Daddy kind of moves forward a little bit so he shoves against the baby's face. The baby can feel something hard under daddy's pants. Daddy grabs his hair and shoves into his face again.

 "Owie daddy." The baby whines.

 "I'm sorry baby boy. I didn't mean to do that. You just make me so happy. Come here." Daddy opens his arms.

 The baby cuddles up to daddy immediately and daddy pulls out a pacifier from his pocket. "I got your sucky, do you want it baby?" 

 The baby nods and opens his mouth. Daddy puts the sucky in.

 The baby contentedly cuddles daddy and sucks on his sucky. He can feel daddy shoving forward again on the front of his thigh.

 Daddy kisses him on both cheeks and then reaches his hand down and starts squeezing his pee-pee through his diaper. It makes him feel funny.

 "Daddy?"

 "Hush, baby. We're just having kisses and cuddles." Says daddy. He sounds funny like he's breathing fast.

 "No like." The baby says.

 Daddy suddenly stops and squeezes his pee-pee really really hard and it hurts. 

 "Owie daddy!" He cries. 

 "If you don't like kisses and cuddles you can have a spanking instead. Is that what you want?" Daddy asks. He sounds angry.

 The baby shakes his head no. 

 "Then be a good baby and be quiet. Kisses and cuddles means I love you. Don't you love me too, baby? If you love someone you have to have kisses and cuddles to let them know."

 The baby stays quiet until daddy starts making silly noises and shoving forward faster against his leg. Then daddy hugs him really hard and says it's naptime.

 "I love you, baby. Such a good boy. Let's have our nap now, huh?"

 "Love daddy." Says the baby. And cuddles up to daddy to sleep.

×

 Bucky wakes with the dream still fresh in his mind. He can't wait to play with daddy for real! He loves daddy. He rolls over in the bed to cuddle up to daddy only to see it's not daddy, it's just that man Steve from last time. 

 Bucky doesn't want to play with Steve. He misses daddy a lot and he wants him to come back and take care of him and play and have kisses and cuddles. 

 He wonders why daddy isn't here. Last time he was awake it was only Steve here with him and for a long time before that he was just all alone. He thinks he hasn't seen daddy in forever and it makes him really, really sad.

 Daddy always said he was a good baby and said he loved him so why doesn't he take care of him anymore? 

 Bucky puts his thumb in his mouth and tries to be extra quiet while he cries because that man Steve is still sleeping. Eventually Bucky cries himself back to sleep too.

×

 When Steve wakes up in the morning, he instantly notices he's freezing. He sighs. Bucky must have hogged the blankets off of him in the night again.

 He sits up ready to yank his half of the blanket back and go back to sleep for a bit, but stops himself when he sees Bucky.

 Bucky has indeed hogged the blanket again, and he has it wrapped around himself tightly. But what makes Steve pause is seeing that his metal thumb has made it's way into his mouth, and the puffy redness around his eyes clearly indicating that he's been crying.

 So Bucky must have fallen into his baby headspace again, he thinks.

 After the incident a few weeks ago where Bucky had accidentally fallen into the baby headspace after breaking a glass and Steve hadn't really understood what was happening, the two supersoldiers had a long talk once Bucky was back to normal. Steve had promised to take good care of Bucky in the event that it might happen again, and he would make good on that promise now.

 He doesn't know if Bucky will be back to normal or still in baby headspace when he wakes up, but he needs to at least be prepared for the latter. So he goes to the closet to rummage through the boxes of things he bought for baby Bucky, pulling out a soft green stuffed cat, a red and blue pacifier, a few diapers and a package of wipes.

 He sets the diapers and wipes on the bedside table so they'll be within reach to change Bucky when he wakes up. Then he gently removes the silver thumb from his mouth and replaces it with the pacifier. He sets the stuffed cat on the pillow next to him so he can see it when he wakes.

 After their talk last time, Steve had instantly embarked on an online shopping spree, buying anything and everything the baby might want. He first bought the basics the baby would need, Bucky had suggested: diapers, wipes, pacifiers, sippy cups. Then he went just a little bit crazy with the things he thought the baby would want, bubble bath, all sorts of toys including but not limited to: bath toys, blocks, cars, stuffed animals, coloring books, crayons, action figures, plastic animals, dinosaurs, puzzles, and more.

 He knew that if Bucky woke up normal he would probably be a little annoyed to find the pacifier in his mouth and the diapers and stuffed animal right there. But Steve had a feeling he wouldn't be waking up normal so it was a risk he'd have to take.

 He watched over Bucky for a few more minutes before he left the room to go make breakfast. 

×

 Bucky wakes up again still sad about his daddy. He doesn't open his eyes yet, he sucks on his thumb for a moment to relax before he recognizes the smooth rubber of a sucky rather than the cool metal of his thumb. He opens his eyes expecting to see daddy because why else would he have his sucky unless daddy gave it to him? But instead he sees he's still in the same room as before, in Steve's bed, and Steve isn't even there anymore. 

 Maybe Steve left him too. He thought he didn't want Steve because he missed daddy too much but even having just Steve was better than having no one. He doesn't want to be all alone again. 

 He rolls over and sees a green kitty on his pillow. He picks it up and it makes a quiet sound like a rattle. It's nice and soft so he hugs it to his chest and sucks his sucky to try to calm down. Daddy and Steve both left him but at least the kitty can be his friend. 

 He feels that his diaper is wet but nobody is here to change it. He needs to pee a bit too but he doesn't want to because he knows he's stuck sitting in the diaper until he turns big again and he doesn't know when that will be. But he knows he also can't hold it that long so he goes anyway. Only when he's halfway finished he feels the diaper start leaking and the pee is going all over his pants and the bed. Now he's gonna be stuck in icky wet clothes instead of just a wet diaper until he turns big again. He doesn't bother trying to be quiet when he cries this time because he thinks no one is there to hear him anyway. He wishes daddy or even Steve still loved him and would come take care of him.

×

 Steve is just finishing up breakfast when he hears Bucky start crying from the bedroom. So he was right about Bucky waking up as the baby.

 He quickly turns off the stove and sets aside the omelets he was making so they won't burn before he heads to the bedroom. 

 He walks in to see Bucky still wrapped up in the blanket, sobbing with the stuffed cat in his arms. At least he likes his plushie, Steve thinks.

 "Aw, what's the matter, Bucky?" He asks. Bucky startles and goes quiet, like he wasn't expecting Steve to be there.

 "You like your kitty cat, sweetheart? I picked it out special just for you." Steve soothes. He smiles when Bucky hugs the plush tighter to him in answer.

 "I bet you're hungry, aren't you Bucky? I made yummy cheesy omelets for you and cut up some apples. I also made bacon if you want it and there's some strawberry yogurt. Do you want breakfast, baby?" Steve asks.

 Bucky stares at Steve for a minute before he nods.

 "Lets get you changed then so we can go eat breakfast." Steve says. But when he reaches for the blanket Bucky starts to cry again. 

 "Wet." Bucky sobs.

 "It's okay, Bucky. I have a new diaper for you right here." Steve says, grabbing a diaper and the wipes from the bedside table. "You don't have to cry."

 Steve pulls the blanket back and sees the wet spot on Bucky's pajamas and on the sheets. "Oh, poor baby. I should have woken you up sooner to change you. It's not your fault." He says, realizing now why Bucky's upset.

 "Pee." Bucky says sadly. 

 "I know. You slept a little longer than usual. It's okay, I'm not mad and we'll get you cleaned right up and go have breakfast, then you can play with all your new toys. Would you like that?"

 Bucky calms down and looks up at Steve at the mention of toys. He nods.

 Steve helps Bucky out of bed and undresses him before he has him lay down on the dry side of the bed to change the soaked diaper. He makes sure the new diaper is taped nice and snug but not too tight. He takes off the sheets and puts them in a pile along with Bucky's wet clothes in front of the door. He gets Bucky dressed in some soft gray joggers and a loose red t-shirt. 

 "Go wait for me on the couch, okay? I'll come get you in a minute for breakfast. Here." Steve says, handing Bucky the cat and the pacifier he had dropped. Bucky takes the items and goes.

 Steve quickly gathers the pile of clothes and bedding and puts it all in the wash before going back to wipe down the mattress protector. 

×

 Bucky goes out to the living room and sits on the couch like Steve told him. He's glad that Steve is here to take care of him now even though he still misses daddy. He was really sad when he thought Steve went away and left him alone like daddy did.

 Bucky rubs the kitty on his cheek. It's really soft and he likes it. He's happy that Steve gave him the kitty and also he said he has more toys for him! Bucky is excited to see the toys. With daddy he had a rubber ducky and a boat for the bath and some crayons for drawing and a little blue teddy bear with a blanket attached. Daddy said he couldn't have too many toys because he had to fit them all in his bag.

 "Let's go eat now. Are you hungry?" Says Steve when he comes out.

 "Hungry." Bucky says. He is very hungry.

 He follows Steve to the kitchen and sits at the table. He watches Steve take omelets from a pan and put them on 2 plates. Steve cuts one of the omelets into pieces and puts apple slices from the cutting board on the plates and bacon from another pan.

 "You can't eat with the pacifier in your mouth." Steve says, putting the plate with the cut up omelet in front of him. Bucky puts his sucky down on the table and also his kitty too so he won't get dirty. 

 The cheesy omelet is really good so Bucky eats all the pieces quickly. Steve sets a blue sippy down next to his plate and Bucky is thirsty so he picks it up and it's full of yummy apple juice when he drinks it. He eats all the bacon and apples and Steve feeds him yogurt which he likes. 

 After breakfast he's nice and full and it makes him tired. But he wants to play with the toys so he doesn't say anything. Steve lets Bucky sit on the couch while he goes to the bedroom and he comes back with some boxes. He puts the boxes on the floor and starts pulling out all sorts of toys! 

 Bucky never had this many toys before. He plays with some cars and dinosaurs for a while with Steve and then they do some puzzles. Then Steve lets Bucky color in a coloring book with puppies on it. There are so many crayons in the box Steve gives him! It even has a sharpener on the back. The toys are so fun Bucky doesn't even know how time went so fast when Steve says it's lunch time already.

 Bucky doesn't want to eat lunch. He just wants to play with his toys.

 "No." He says.

 "Yes," says Steve. "You need to eat lunch. We can play more later."

 "No eat." Says Bucky. 

 "You're eating lunch, Buck. The toys aren't going anywhere." Steve says. He reaches to pick Bucky up.

 Bucky doesn't want to go eat lunch. He was having fun playing but now that he's not so busy focusing on his toys he feels really tired and he notices he's wet. He pushes away from Steve when he tries to pick him up.

 "Bucky." Steve says firmly. 

 "No!" Bucky whines. He's really tired now and wet and he doesn't want lunch. So he starts crying because he doesn't know what else to do.

×

 Steve sighs when Bucky starts crying and pushing him away. He promised he would take care of Bucky, and of course he will. But he doesn't really want to deal with a tantrum.

 "Bucky." He says. "Do you think throwing a fit is good behavior?"

 Bucky rubs his eyes and yawns.

 "Aw, are you just cranky 'cause you're tired?" Steve asks. Bucky nods.

 "Throwing tantrums isn't a good way to express your feelings" Steve says. "But I'll let it go this time. You still need to eat lunch, but then you can have a nap. How's that sound?"

 Bucky holds his arms out and Steve picks him up. When he puts one hand under Bucky's butt to support him, he feels the squish of a wet diaper and tries not to cringe. He's gonna have to get used to that.

 "Let's get you changed first."

 He takes Bucky back to the bedroom to change him on the bed. He sees Bucky smiling at him as he tapes up the new diaper so he smiles back.

 "Kiss an' cuddle." Says Bucky.

 Steve chuckles at the cute baby and gives him a kiss on the cheek when he picks him back up.

 "No." Bucky says. "Kiss an cuddle."

 "I just gave you a kiss, silly boy. We can cuddle in bed after lunch." Steve says.

 Bucky pouts.

 Steve just cuts up a couple of hot dogs since he doesn't think Bucky will eat much right now. He'll just have to give him a snack later and make sure he has vegetables with dinner.

 Bucky eats most of the cut up hot dog pieces and manages to smear the ketchup that Steve put on the side of the plate all over the table.

 Steve wipes Bucky's hands and the table and makes sure he drinks a cup of milk. Then he washes the sippy cup out and refills it with water before picking Bucky back up to carry him to bed.

 "Kiss an cuddle." Bucky says when Steve lays him down. 

 Steve lays down to let Bucky cuddle him and he laughs when Bucky jumps on him and gives him sloppy kisses all over his face.

 "What are you doing, Bucky? I thought you were tired!" Steve says with mock annoyance, but he's smiling. 

 Bucky giggles and keeps kissing his face, then he starts kissing his chest and stomach, but Steve startles and pushes him off when Bucky tries to go for his crotch. 

 "No!" He says. "Bucky don't. What are you doing?"

 "Kiss an cuddle!" Bucky says. 

 "No, not like that. No kisses there. Who taught you that?" Steve asks but he already knows the answer.

 "Daddy." Says Bucky.

 "Well I'm not daddy and I don't want that. Your "daddy" shouldn't have made you do that either. That's a naughty touch." Steve says after a second of thinking how to explain this to Bucky in this mindset. 

 "Kiss an cuddle." Bucky says. "Steve turn."

 "I think we should go to sleep now, Bucky." Steve says. Bucky doesn't even seem to be listening to him.

 "Kiss an cuddle!" Bucky demands.

 Steve sighs. He can kiss Bucky's cheeks but he won't do anything else. He hopes Brock Rumlow is suffering, wherever he is.

 Steve gives Bucky a kiss on both cheeks. "There's your kisses. Naptime now." He says.

 "More." Bucky says.

 "That's enough, Bucky. It's time to sleep." 

 Bucky starts crying so Steve pulls him down onto his chest like how Bucky slept last time he was little. He pushes Bucky's kitty into his hands and the pacifier into his mouth and pulls the blanket over them.

 Bucky cries himself to sleep while Steve holds him and gently rubs his back. But Steve stays awake for a while thinking about the situation.

Bucky hadn't mentioned sexual abuse when they had their talk about this. But then again he had said he mostly didn't remember much about being in the baby headspace so maybe he doesn't even know about it. It makes Steve feel sick. Sure, he and Bucky have sex, and give each other oral, and all sorts of other adult activities. But that's when he's an adult. He knows Bucky's still an adult either way, technically. But Bucky can't consent when he's little like this. They're gonna have to have a talk about this when Bucky is big again. 

 He realizes how tired he is now and decides he ought to take a nap as well so he can take care of Bucky when he's up. He focuses on the weight of Bucky on top of him and the sound of his steady breathing until he falls asleep. 

×

 When Bucky wakes up he is hungry. He was too tired to eat a lot at lunch. Steve is still sleeping though. 

 Bucky likes Steve. Steve gave him all kinds of toys and he takes care of him. He just wishes Steve loved him. Daddy always said that kisses and cuddles is how you show someone you love them, and Steve won't give Bucky kisses and cuddles. That makes him sad.

 Maybe Steve will be more happy after he takes a nap, Bucky thinks. He feels a little better now so maybe a nap will help Steve too. He decides to let Steve sleep.

 He gets up quietly so he doesn't wake up Steve. The kitty rattles a little when he sits up though.

 "Shhh" he tells the kitty. 

 He goes to the kitchen to find something to eat. He sits kitty down on the table and opens the fridge first. He sees apple juice and that's what he wants! He gives his sucky to the kitty on the table. He opens the bottle easily with his metal hand and he tries to be extra careful to drink it because he doesn't want to spill it. He manages to get most of it in his mouth, and only a little bit spills down his shirt. He wasn't paying attention because it was too yummy so he didn't notice he drank all of it.

 His tummy feels full now with all the juice because it was a lot. But he still wants to eat. He goes to the pantry next and he sees chocolate pudding. He grabs one and pulls off the lid but he must have been squeezing the cup too hard because it oozes out all over his hand. He wipes it off on his shirt and grabs another one. He's careful with this one. He doesn't have a spoon and he's not supposed to use utensils anyway because daddy said so. So he dips his fingers in it and licks it off.

 He sees a package of cookies on the next shelf so he eats some of those too. It makes him a little thirsty again so he goes back to the fridge and he tries to drink some milk from the carton but he drops it and the milk goes everywhere. 

 He gets a little scared because he doesn't want to get in trouble for making a mess. He goes to the bathroom for a towel but he doesn't see any towels in there. He sees shaving cream though, and he remembers daddy letting him play with shaving cream in the bath sometimes. He likes how it feels squishy in his hands. So he sprays the shaving cream on the counter and squishes it around, on the counter, on the mirror, on the wall, completely forgetting about the milk. 

 After a bit he gets kind of bored, so he wipes the shaving cream off his hands on his shirt and goes back out to the living room. He sees the coloring book and crayons on the table and he has a great idea! 

 He can draw a picture for Steve and then Steve will be happy and he will love him like daddy did. But he only has the coloring book and no blank paper. He wants to draw his own picture, not just color one because that's not as special. He doesn't see any paper when he looks around, but the wall is big and blank.

 So he takes out some of his favorite colors and draws a picture for Steve. He draws him and Steve and the kitty, and then he draws some flowers and hearts, and he draws dinosaurs like the toy ones Steve gave him. He has fun drawing until he starts feeling dripping down his leg and he realizes he's peeing and he didn't even notice. His diaper was already wet from his nap and it's leaking again. He drops the crayons and grabs himself to try to stop peeing but he can't, he really really needs to go after drinking all the juice and he can't make it stop. It trickles out the diaper's leg holes and runs down his legs and makes a puddle around his feet. His pants are all wet now and his socks too. He starts to cry. 

 He decides Steve has slept long enough.

× 

 Steve hears Bucky crying when he wakes up. The sound quickly gets closer and he's barely opened his eyes yet when Bucky suddenly jumps on top of him, knocking the air from his lungs.

 "Ow! Bucky!" He takes a minute to get his breath back before he can comfort the distraught baby.

 "What's the matter, Buck? Tell me what happened...what's all over your face?" He pulls back to look at Bucky.

 Bucky is covered in pudding. It's all over his face, his clothes, his hands, even in his hair. He has cookie crumbs on his shirt as well, and is that shaving cream? He has wet streaks going down his pants legs and his socks are soaked. Steve knows it must be pee because he can smell it. Bucky also has a wet stain on the front of his shirt at the neck that Steve hopes is not pee because he doesn't want to know how it got up there if it is. He sniffs it, it's just apple juice.

 Bucky has clearly been having some sneaky fun while Steve has been sleeping.

 "What have you been up to, Bucky?" He asks. Bucky doesn't answer but he didn't expect him to. He's crying really hard and Steve needs to calm him down.

 He picks him up, ignoring all the food and bodily fluids, and sways a bit to soothe him. He rubs his back and waits for the sobbing to die down a bit.

 "Please calm down, Bucky. It's okay, you're okay. I think you need a bath, and I have bubbles and toys for you this time. I think a nice bath will help you calm down, hmm? Let's go."

 He carries Bucky to the bathroom and he gasps at the sight when he walks in. There is shaving cream smeared everywhere. 

 "Bucky." Steve is trying not to get mad. "Why did you do this?"

 "Play." Bucky says.

 Steve takes some deep breaths. "We will discuss this later. Right now you need a bath."

 He starts the bath and puts in the bubble bath he bought for Bucky. Bucky's stopped crying now and watches the bubbles fill the tub. Steve gets out a package of rubber animal bath toys from under the sink and throws them in. He gets Bucky undressed and helps him into the tub.

 He finds it hard to stay mad at Bucky as he watches him play with the rubber toys and bubbles. He's giggling and splashing and clearly having fun while Steve washes him up. He can't help but smile.

 He helps Bucky out of the tub once he's clean and wraps him up in a towel before he takes him back to the bedroom to diaper and dress him. Bucky's mood has definitely improved from the bath. Steve tickles him as he gets him dressed. He loves hearing the cute little giggles.

 It's after Bucky's all dressed and they walk out to the living room that Steve has to try to stay calm again. The wall is covered in childish crayon scribbles. 

 "Bucky!" He tries not to yell but his voice is definitely louder than usual. "You drew on the walls? That is not nice behavior!"

 "Pitcher." Bucky says. His lower lip wobbles a bit and he doesn't look Steve in the eyes.

 Steve sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose. He needs to stay calm. He doesn't want to scare Bucky or do anything rash out of anger.

 "Bucky. The walls are not for drawing on. That was a naughty thing to do and you will be helping me clean off the wall after you have a time out. Why did you do this?"

 "Pitcher for you." Bucky says. "Love Steve."

 "I'm glad that you love me, Buck, I love you too. So much. But I would like the drawing a lot more on paper. We can't leave it on the wall so I'm sad that I don't get to keep it. I need you to go sit down in the corner for 5 minutes and then you can help me clean it off."

 Bucky cries but obeys and goes to sit in the corner. Steve heads to the kitchen to grab some cleaning supplies for the wall and once again finds his patience being tested.

 The fridge has been left open. There is milk all over the floor and the carton is laying on its side in the puddle. 2 empty pudding cups and a half eaten package of cookies are on the floor in front of the pantry, and there is pudding and crumbs all over. The apple juice carton is empty on the table next to Bucky's stuffed cat and pacifier. 

 Steve leans on the wall and thinks. He needs to think rationally and not let anger dictate his actions. Bucky is in his baby headspace and doesn't know any better right now. I should have been watching him. This won't even be that much work to clean, he tells himself.

 He takes some deep breaths to stay calm.

 He goes back to the living room and sits on the couch. "Bucky, come here." He says.

 Bucky turns around to face him but doesn't come. "Spankin?" He asks.

 "No. No spanking, I promise. I just want to talk to you. Come here please." Bucky walks over this time and sits in his lap, sucking his thumb. 

 "First, can you tell me why you got into the food and made a mess?" Steve asks.

 "Hungry." Bucky says.

 "Okay, you were hungry. What do you think would be a better decision next time? Do you think you should come get me and ask for a snack or drink instead of trying to get it yourself?"

 Bucky nods.

 "And why did you put shaving cream all over the bathroom?" 

 "Playing." Bucky says.

 "Okay, I understand you wanted to play. Next time, what should you do differently? Do you think you should play with things that aren't yours without asking first?"

 Bucky shakes his head.

 "Now, I understand you wanted to draw a picture for me and I appreciate that. It's a lovely picture but it would be a lot prettier on paper. Drawing on the walls is naughty. I think your crayons will be off limits for the rest of the day, and then maybe tomorrow you can try again on paper." Steve says. "Do you think that's fair?" 

 Bucky nods. "Steve happy?" 

 "I'm not very happy right now, but I'm not angry anymore. I took my own time out to cool off while you were in the corner."

 "Love Steve." Bucky says. "Kiss an cuddle now?"

 "No, Bucky. I need to talk to you about that too but I wanted to wait until you could understand. We can kiss on the cheeks and cuddle on the couch or in bed to relax or sleep. And we can have hugs and I can hold you. But there are some things that are naughty touches that we can't do. "Daddy" was naughty to touch you that way or make you touch him that way. You shouldn't touch or kiss anyone the way he did with you. You shouldn't touch anyone's private parts or let anyone touch yours. I can only touch there when I'm giving you a bath or changing your diaper. Do you understand?"

 "No love?" Bucky asks.

 "I do love you. There are lots of ways to show love that are more appropriate."

 Steve lets Bucky lay his head on his shoulder and suck his thumb for a few minutes. He's going to have Bucky help him clean up all the messes, but they can sit and relax for a little while. 

 Steve knows once Bucky is back in his normal headspace again they'll laugh about it when Steve tells him about the messes. His patience may have been tested today but he knows it's not the end of the world. He's just happy to have Bucky back in his life anyway, even if he's regressed sometimes. Steve doesn't care if he never learns to control it. He'll take care of Bucky forever if he has to.

 "Let's go clean up." Steve says.

 He has Bucky throw the milk and juice cartons in the trash while he mops the floor. Then they wipe the shaving cream off the surfaces in the bathroom together. Steve lets Bucky carry the bucket of soapy water to the living room so they can clean the wall. Steve also cleans up the pee puddle he didn't notice before. He doesn't get angry over that. He can never be angry at Bucky for accidents. 

 And when Bucky knocks over the soapy water bucket all over the floor after they clean the wall, and looks nervously to Steve to see his reaction, Steve just smiles and tells him it's alright. They clean that up together too.