Chapter 11
Steve,
I'm feeling a lot better! I wanted to get this to you as soon as I could because it's unfair you'd have to wait so long for my words back haha. I also wanted to assure you I'm ok. There's nothing more in the world I want than having you here as well. Kind of messed up I still don't know what you look like (not that that matters much anyways) but I can't help but picture you nonetheless. My friend is going to teach me to fish. And to save you from writing it yes I did rent a house on a lake without bothering to know how to do such simple "Lake activities". I hope you are well! …We didn't get to that yet. How are you? How's the ER? How are your friends?
I got your necklaces. I'm rolling my eyes in a joking manner as I write this. Yes I'm wearing it now because it's from you, you jerk. No other reason. Some customer made the comment I was finally coming out (I've been out my whole adult lifeee). Anyways thank you for it, apparently gifts do make it traveling back in time haha. Also yes I'm back at work! The bar is (mostly) functional now.
Anyways I just wanted to leave you a little something for you now that it'll be another week without contact. I'm sorry it's not as long as the others. We'll get back to the novella length letters soon. :)
Love and miss you,
Bucky
Steve smiles as he refolds the letter and puts it back in the envelope. He was surprised when he came by the Lakehouse to check it out before he resigned a lease for the next few months to see the flag up. He figured Bucky wouldn't have the chance to get back to him until after his friend's visit. Steve jots down a few sentences to Bucky just more or less letting him know he got the letter and that work is good but he'll let him know more news when after this week, let Bucky enjoy his time with his guest. He congratulates him for getting back to work. He ends the note with an "I'll be waiting patiently <3" and signs it. Leaving the note in the box he gives the property one more look and hops in his car.
The week Bucky spends with his friend Steve spends making the Lakehouse a semi home again. He wont be here everyday but definitely on his days off and maybe he'll even take a few days or a week off of work to spend here. He's in a different headplace than he was when he moved in the first time, somehow more at piece. Which is funny because that was his reason for renting it out the first time initially anyways. To find piece. Then of course the job loss, the breakup, and going back to the ER all fell on him during his stay but that was in the past now, it didn't matter anymore. All that mattered was Bucky and this insane way they got to know each other and love each other.
Steve is finished making the inside comfortable after a day shift at work and he walks around the house. He walks around wondering what Bucky was doing in this very place but in a different time.
Was his friend still there? Were they enjoying their time? Were they laughing together? Talking? Then Steve was thinking about Bucky's laugh. What did it sound like? Did he mostly chuckle? Did he scream laugh? Does he laugh so hard he pulls his head back, risking falling back in his chair? Or is he more of the lean forward clutch chest type when something was really funny?
Did he smile wide? What was his smile like when it was mid conversation? Happy at someone's comment, small assurance he was understanding? What was his smile like when he wasn't posing for a picture with a newspaper?
He wonders what his friends got to see and was all the sudden jealous again of the fact they got to see him in move around, be present. They got to know what his voice sounded like, what he smelled like, possibly what he felt like as fingers graze fingers when he hands them a drink. They got to see him be a person not just someone in a photograph.
Steve shakes that sad thought from his mind before it lets him worry if he'll ever get to be with Bucky. Get to see him, feel him, touch him...taste him. He looks around the house more, he goes outside and looks around out there. He sees the flag down but he knows it'd be like that. He stops for a minute by the grass where his car is parked and closes his eyes, letting the wind hit his face gently. He pictures himself here with Bucky. He smiles at the thought, the hope, of them finally meeting each other where it all started. He opens his eyes and it's almost as if Bucky felt it too because when Steve turns around back to the mailbox the flag is up.
Steve does a double take and when his brain finally registers what he was seeing he runs over to the mailbox. He pulls the metal flap open and sure enough a letter was inside. He is of course excited to get the letter but then a little sad for Bucky who's visit with his friend is coming to a close, or his friend is gone by now if Steve had already gotten a letter. He hopes the visit wasn't cut short by anything.
Dear Steve,
I'm alone again. But I'm okay with it haha. Wow that sounds more dramatic than I meant. My friend just left and I couldn't wait to write you. I literally think he pulled out of the drive way not 5 minutes before I grabbed a pen and paper out of my desk drawer and started writing to you. It was a good visit, much needed. Very nice and calm and peaceful. Like I guess how a Lakehouse is supposed to make you feel and it's not that it didn't most of the time I just tend to bask in isolation and not realize when it's harming me.
I learned to fish! Don't like it very much haha. I guess it's relaxing but man I just wanted to nap. Also doesn't help I didn't manage to catch a damn thing, not even a bite on my line. My friend was more lucky. But it was nice. Jack apparently loves people so that's good. Makes me wonder how he ended up being a stray.
Glad work is good. Maybe new hires means more time with me?? I'm kidding. You said you had something to tell me? Hopefully good news, we could use that huh?
Oh my friend is making me go to this party. Cue me rolling my eyes but he claims I need to "get out more" and "make more friends" bla bla bla. Which I suppose I really should. I burden him too much even though he insists otherwise. He also doesn't know about you, which I hate, but having 2 people you're close with still doesn't look great. I offered to tend bar for the party instead but he said no. Siiiigggghhh. Guess I have to socialize. We'll see how it goes. He tells me I need to let more people in and learn/relearn to trust. Shit is hard though. It's on Friday night (my time haha) so I'll let you know Saturday or so how it goes. Wish me luck?
Also I have to find your older letters so I can remember where we left off. We were in a good conversation and my dumb brain ruined it.
Miss you! Talk more soon.
Love,
Bucky
PS. I'm back at work full time this week. I came back for a few hours here after my umm... after I felt better (hence that customer's comment about the necklace). But haven't been back normal hours yet. So maybe I need double "good lucks" haha. But see how wrapped up I was about this party and "friends" that I forgot about that?? This is why I don't go to parties.
Steve smiles warmly. He's so happy Bucky had a good time and seemed to be in a better mindset. Kudos to this friend of his. He laughs at Bucky not liking fishing. Steve enjoyed it a little, it was such a dramatic difference than his usual day, but it was something he rarely did. He always has something to do on his days off and he can definitely sympathize with Bucky. On days when you don't even have a bite they can be torture. Matter of fact the last time Steve went out he spent hours on the boat with nothing except maybe a nibble and he never went back out again. That was ages ago, back when he still had the private practice.
Later in the day, before he heads back to his apartment to grab last minute things for the lakehouse, he leaves Bucky a letter back.
Bucky,
I'll anxiously wait for a letter about your Friday night. It'll be fun I'm sure! Your friend is right. You such a wonderful person you deserve to have more friends. More people to care about you and love you as he does and I do...except don't let them love you EXACTLY how I do haha if you know what I mean. (god that's stupid)
Anyways friends are great, making them sucks but once you get that connection and trust nothing compares. (Why am I pitching the idea of friends to you as if it's a foreign concept??) I miss mine, don't get to see them enough. Partially my fault, partially my jobs fault. One of my best friends moved away a bit ago, the one I had the private practice with, and I've been absolute shit at staying in contact. Need to do better at that...
God ahhg not about me! About you! Yay for going out! I'm laughing about the fishing ordeal. Maybe I'll have to take you out fishing one time. If we both get no bites I'm sure there's something else we can think of doing :). I'm kidding. It's definitely weird for a beginner. You sit there and hope on the off chance something in the water bites something floating in the water and holds on.
Don't worry about past letters. We'll get back to it. And dont call your brain dumb!
Oh my news!! Yes. Soo umm guess who's going to be a resident of the lakhouse again ?? :D. Just on days off though, it's too far a drive to work sadly but it'll be nice to have this place back for days and nights I'm off (might even take a mini vacation if the new staff gives me the ability to do so). And it'll be so nice being "technically" so close to you. Or rather as close as I'm going to get. At the very least I'll be able to get your letters as soon as you sent them so that will be nice. Anyway I'm looking foward to it. I actually just moved stuff back in this week after or before work. I'm leaving one last time to get some clothes to keep here, of which I'll bring with me tomorrow. I have the next few days off so it looks like I'll be working on your exciting Friday night but I'm excited to read the letter of how it goes as soon as you send it. I'll be at the lakehouse all weekend <3.
About the party again, just remember to have fun. You deserve it. And make friends hahaha.
Good luck this week at work too! Hope the days are easy on you.
Can't wait to hear back
Love ,
Steve.
Steve leaves the letter in the box with a smile. He hops in his car and turns on the headlights, it had gotten dark about an hour ago. He drives home where he packs up some stuff in his suitcase and puts it by the door to take with him the next day.
The rest of the week goes by easily. Steve is settled back in the lakehouse with clothes, comfort objects, and fridge stocked. He doesn't get a letter back from Bucky but he doesn't worry. He knows he's back to work this week and he also knows his anticipation for Friday is probably making him anxious.
Friday comes and Steve has a late shift. He thinks about Bucky and what he was doing right now; talking to people, trying to make friends. He thinks about his friends which makes him think about Sam. So, on his downtime, which some might call a break, he finally decides to call Sam.
It goes to voicemail. Steve isn't surprised by that though, Sam was probably busy and/or didn't have his phone on him. Steve waits for the automated voice to tell him who he was trying to call and to leave his message at the beep.
*Beep*
"Hey uh Sam. It's Steve. I know it's been a while. Just wanted to check in and see how you were. Catch up, maybe. Umm give me a call back when you can. Or wait I'm actually technically at work so just leave a message I guess? Hope this doesn't start in some sort of phone chase. Anyways I'm sorry I'm shit at keeping in touch. Talk to you later hopefully."
Steve ends the message before he could blab more. He thinks he should've texted but then remembers that they did used to text but texting was hard for both of them to keep up with the conversation. They were both much better at phone calls or emails even. Maybe he should've emailed. Just when he's about to think seriously about that option he gets called for a patient.
The night ends with an exhausted Steve dressing back in his normal clothes and checking his phone to see no missed call or voicemail from Sam. He puts his phone in his now jeans pocket and walks through the hospital parking lot to locate his car. On night shifts he drives to work because he's not risking a cab or any other mode of transportation late in the night/early morning. Part of him thinks to just go back to his apartment and head over to the lakehouse in the morning but the other part, the bigger part, or him just wants to get his relaxing weekend started. So from the hospital he heads that way.
He watches as the sun starts to rise on his way to the house that was mostly made of windows. Yeah this might've not been the best idea. Some windows do close but not all. He stops at a convenience store when he's almost to the house. He picks up some drinks, extra snacks, and manages to find a sleep mask as he walks through isles. He gets home, puts his food away, and drinks in the fridge. He breaks the sleep mask out of the packaging, ignoring the princess crown sew into it, and places it on his head as he stripes his clothes off. And it's like the lakehouse said, "I've got you, rest" because he did just that. He didn't even stir or toss and turn.
He wakes up around 1pm to a growling stomach and a dry mouth. He cooks himself some lunch, grilled cheese, and pours himself a cold glass of Orange Juice. He looks outside to the road just daydreaming. Then observes the road which leads to him observing the mailbox and low and behold the flag was up!
Steve finishes his grilled cheese and puts his half full glass of orange juice down as he makes his way outside to retrieve his mail.
To no surprise to Steve it was a letter from Bucky. Steve quickly tears open the envelope, anxious to see what Bucky's party was like.
There's no addresses on the envelope, no greeting. Just a straight to the point....
STEVE HAVE I GOT A STORY TO TELL YOU!!!