The Math Teacher From Hell
May 17th did not go as Sirius Black expected it.
It started off well enough - his alarm went off without any problems (technology liked to short-circuit around him a lot.) He got the last cinnamon bagel at the bakery across from his apartment and had time to run home a blueberry one to his little brother - who was home sick for the day. He’d caught his bus and hadn’t been berated by anyone for money, he got to school with five minutes to spare and remembered his permission slip. His best friend had been assigned to sit next to him on the bus, and he’d even found five dollars on the ground to get a snack from the vending machine at the museum.
Things started to go downhill when the bus left the school.
The first thing that happened was that slimy little git named Severus Snape. He’d called James a bastard - on account of him having an absentee father - and suddenly his water bottle had exploded in his bag onto his pants - making it look as if he’d pissed himself. Somehow Sirius had been blamed for it - which made absolutely no sense because how the fuck had he exploded someone’s water bottle? Magic? Sirius wasn’t a goddamn wizard!
James had thought it was hilarious, though he did give Sirius a strange look when it happened. But James was always like that, he never called Sirius weird or made him feel as if the things that went on around him were his own fault, which is probably why he was one of Sirius'only friends at Durmstrang Academy. Well, actually he was one of the only friends Sirius had made at any of the schools he’d been at for the last ten years of his life - which totaled out to be around eleven on account of his mother putting him in preschool at only two.
The next thing to go wrong was at the museum itself when his favorite teacher - Professor McGonagall - had been explaining the story of Zeus. Sirius had actually been paying attention for once, the story of how the god had been eaten by his father and ended up rescuing his siblings by trickery really made him think of himself.
See, Sirius would do nearly anything for his little brother Regulus. Their home life was what one might call unstable, their mother was a raging bitch and Sirius often thought that she should never have had children in the first place if she was going to treat them as she did. And their stepfather? Well to say the very least Sirius hated Orion with every bone in his body. He wished every horrible thing he could upon the man and wanted more than anything to be free of his control.
Mcgonagall had gone on to explain the relationships of the siblings - where Sirius learned that there were three ‘powerful’ gods - which to him sounded like bullshit because well anyone who had the power of the cosmos was powerful right? Anyways, Sirius was listening to the story of Poseidon when he was tapped on the shoulder. He turned his head to the left and saw a small group of older kids, including Severus - the boy he’d supposedly exploded a water bottle on earlier that day.
“What do you want?” Sirius hissed, silently praying to whatever gods they were supposed to be learning about that James or Lily was nearby and would stop anything from getting out of hand.
“Oh, nothing,” one of the other boys smirked. Sirius couldn’t recall his name off the top of his head but the thought it started with an M. Or maybe an N? He couldn't remember, and letters were easily mixed up in his head.
“Well then just fuck off would you?” Sirius mumbled, turning away and trying to tune back into the lesson. Poseidon was the god of water, the ocean, and… horses? That was odd, why horses? Sirius tried to scribble these things down in his notebook before they fled his mind.
“Meet us by the fountain during lunch yeah Black?” Severus chuckled under his breath.
Sirius groaned but nodded nonetheless, “yeah alright.” He knew what would happen, they’d steal his lunch and likely shove him around a bit before finding a way to get him into some kind of trouble. It always happened like that. No matter what school he was at, there were always people that thought they were better and would take advantage of those who they deemed ‘under them’.
Sirius shuffled away from them quickly and over to where James was a few feet away, he was surprisingly scribbling down notes on a pad of paper but when Sirius tried to read them over his shoulder it seemed to be in an entirely different language… James knew another language? James was just as much of a dyslexic mess as he was!
“-now of course there are many other gods other than the twelve main Olympians. However, this trip to the museum will only cover them. When we get back from lunch please meet by the statue of Poesidian in the next hall and we’ll talk more about what roles each of Zeus’ siblings played in their society.”
“Fuck,” Sirius swore under his breath, he’d have to ask James what had happened while he was dealing with the other boys - considering he apparently could take notes now! (where was he when Sirius needed him for the math notes?)
“Hey dude,” James grinned at him and the class split apart and began to head outside for lunch, slipping the notepad away into his messenger bag.
“Hi Jamie,” Sirius mumbled, shoving his hands into his jeans pockets.
“You okay?” James touched his shoulder gently.
Sirius shrugged, “yes, I’m just… I just hate it when people think they’re better than everyone else.”
“Please tell me you didn’t agree to go and meet Snivillus and his goons,” James sighed, giving him a worried look.
“What?” Sirius’ voice went up an octave. “No, I would never. I’ve got to go and take care of something real quick, so why don’t you go and eat with Evans?”
“Sirius!” James grabbed his wrist before he could slip off in the direction of the fountain where he said he would meet the other boys. “Try not to get into any trouble okay…?”
“Me? Getting into trouble?” Sirius smirked, gently prying James’ fingers off of his wrist. “Never. Now really go and hang out with Evans, I’ll catch up before lunch is over.”
James looked at his skeptically but sighed and dropped his hand, “alright but if you’re not back in fifteen minutes I’m coming in.”
“Sorry, Jamie boy but I don’t think your stick arms would be much help in a fight,” Sirius snickered as he walked away.
“You’d be surprised what I can do!” James laughed back at him.
Sirius was in a much lighter mood as he walked out the front of the building and turned left to the small fountain around the side of the building where the three boys were waiting for him. He tightened his fingers around the strap of his backpack and held his head high, it’s not like he ever went down without a fight - which may be the reason he’d been expelled so many times for starting fights.
“Hello Snivillus,” Sirius snarked, not backing down. Boys like these bothered Sirius, they thought just because they had money and went to a fancy privet school that they ran the world. The truth was that Sirius also had money - his mother was quite well off and his stepfather might as well have been a billionaire - he also attended a nice school, but the difference was he wasn’t cocky unless there was a reason to be. Sirius still had to work for everything, his dyslexia was so severe most of the time he couldn’t even do his coursework, and it was very hard for him to pay attention in most classes (thanks to his ADHD), but Sirius wasn’t like those boys. And he took pride in the fact that he wasn’t.
“Surprised you came Black,” one of the other boys sneered, Sirius just shrugged and closed the gap between them.
“I’m not one to back out of fights,” Sirius explained carefully, eyeing the movements of the boys around him.
“Who said anything about a fight?” Severus raised a brow.
“Well,” Sirius raised his eye. “I assume you didn’t ask me here to make out.” All three boys pulled a face. “That’s what I thought.”
“You’re disgusting,” one of the taller boys got in his face, he reached up to hit Sirius but he ducked out of the way just as his fist would have connected with his face.
“Gonna have to be quicker than that,” Sirius taunted, jumping up onto the ledge of the fountain. The cold spray of water brushed up against the back of his arms.
“You little shit,” the other boy glared and leaped toward him, this time Sirius was unprepared and braced himself to fall back into the water behind him.
What happened next Sirius could never explain, no matter how hard he tried. The water in the bowl of the fountain rose up, creating a wall around Sirius and protecting him from the body coming towards him, then it reached out in a tentacle-like fashion and shoved all three boys back. The water wrapped around their bodies and swept them off across the small space - slamming them into the wall of the neighboring building.
The water returned to the fountain and Sirius stood on the ledge completely untouched.
“What the fuck?” Sirius asked himself more than anyone else. He ran a hand through his hair and realized he was entirely dry, not a drop of water had stuck to his clothing or body - despite the fact he’d just been engulfed in a wave.
The boys were staring at him in horror, all three of them soaking wet and crumpled in a pile on the ground. Sirius just smirked at them, righting his tee shirt and hopping down from the concrete before striding away to find James and Lily.
He found them perched on a wall near a statue of some guy with a bow and arrow. James saw him and waved him over with a wide grin, whispering something to Lily just as he came into earshot.
“Hey Evans,” Sirius smiled, planting his palms on the wall and hoisting himself up.
“Hi Sirius,” she chuckled, brushing her auburn hair over her shoulder.
Lily Evans was a force. She also happened to be one of Sirius’ only friends, she was a genius, always top of their classes, and never hesitated to help Sirius when he asked for it. She was also stunning, she had choppy-cut auburn hair which framed her face in perfect layers, striking green eyes, and the most interesting style. She could always be found in bright colors, accompanied by lots of jewelry.
She and James had a ‘thing’ which Sirius took as they both really liked each other but neither of them wanted to make it official.
“Everything okay?” James asked through a bite of his apple.
“Yup!” Sirius smiled popping his ‘p’, “they tried to hit me but then the fountain exploded and threw them across the yard.”
Lily nearly choked on her sprite, “I’m sorry what?”
Sirius shrugged, “the fountain exploded. No biggy, weird shit like that happens all the time.” He waved his hand dismissively, digging through his backpack for the paper bag he’d thrown a ham sandwich and banana into earlier. He also found a small folded-up sticky note,
Have a good field trip today! Try not to get into any trouble.
Xx Reg
Sirius smiled at Regulus’ neat handwriting.
“Sirius!” Lily snapped her fingers in his face and he came back into the moment.
“What?” he hummed, unwrapping the sandwich from the ziplock baggy.
“Water regularly explodes around you?” She raised a brow.
“Well yeah,” Sirius shrugged, “weird things happen around me all the time! Not just water too, like last week every single fuse in my house blew when my stepdad was being a jerk! It was the best moment of my life!”
“Interesting,” she narrowed her eyes and sent a glance to James who just shrugged, swallowing the last bite of his apple.
“What’s interesting?” Sirius asked, he hated when he felt left out.
“Nothing,” Lily brushed it off, focusing back on her muffin. Sirius slumped down and took a bite out of his sandwich - which no longer seemed as appealing as it had been a moment ago.
The trio ate in silence for a few minutes before there was a shout from a few feet away.
“Sirius Black!” a shrill voice came, and Sirius immediately swallowed hard. This wasn’t good.
“Yes?” he raised his hand slightly, making sure the teacher saw where he was at.
“Please come with me, Mr. Black,” the woman commanded. Sirius gave James and Lily a dramatic wink and jumped down from the wall. They were both giving him sympathetic glances.
“Well if I’m not expelled when I return we can throw a party,” he laughed it off, but truthfully his heart sank a bit at the thought. His mother would have his head for this, and his stepfather… Sirius didn’t even want to think about it. He’d have to borrow someone’s phone to call Regulus and tell him to go somewhere for a bit after he returned from the field trip.
He trudged over to where the teacher was waiting for him by the museum doors, Ms. Carrow was a strange woman, she was uptight, and in Sirius’ personal opinion; far too invested in the lives of her students. But she was also mean, she would often give Sirius detention for hours after school - and even made him go when he was meant to be at swim or staking (which made Walburga and Orion furious considering those were the only two things Sirius was good at.)
“Mr. Black,” she began, still leading him inside. “I’ve just been told by three young men that you attacked them. Is that a correct accusation?”
Sirius scrunched his eyebrows, “well technically I didn’t attack them no. They tried to beat me up though.”
“I didn’t ask what they did to you, I asked what you did to them,” she replied stiffly. “Now what did you mean by technically you didn’t attack them?”
Sirius bit his lip, whenever he tried to tell adults about what happened they just scolded him and said his imagination was running wild. He assumed that Carrow would be the same, but how else was he supposed to explain how the boys had been drenched in water and thrown across the courtyard? “A wave attacked them.”
“A wave?” she repeated, pausing momentarily before continuing to lead Sirius further into the museum. “Of water?”
“Yes,” Sirius nodded. “From the fountain.”
“I see…”
Well, it was a ‘Sirius this is unacceptable behavior’ or ‘Sirius I need to recommend you get checked out by a doctor’ it was just an ‘I see.’
“Dunno how,” Sirius continued to explain. “Stuff like that just happens sometimes. Most people think I’m mentally ill.”
The teacher let out a small laugh and opened a door, which Sirius walked through without a second thought. “Yes well, most people aren’t like us.”
“Like us?” Sirius cocked his head.
“Yes Sirius,” the woman hummed. “Now tell me,” she paused, looking him over once. “Have you ever met your father?”
Sirius was taken aback, why the fuck was his math teacher asking about his father? “Uh no. He kinda left my mom in a lurch when he found out about me.”
“I see…” she said again, her voice changing slightly with each word that fell off her lips. “And have you any idea who he might be?”
“Nope,” Sirius narrowed his eyes, chewing the inside of his lip curiously.
“Pity,” she turned her back to him. Sirius peered around her and saw that they were actually standing in a storage room full of extra paintings and statues not currently on display. Why had she taken them here? He allowed his mind to wander for a moment before he was pulled back to reality quite brutally.
“You know it’s a shame your little halfblood friends didn’t follow us back here, you maybe have actually stood a chance,” the woman turned back to Sirius very slowly, her voice had become quite distorted, and only now did Sirius begin to get concerned.
“Um,” Sirius gulped as he studied the figure in front of him, growing from his teacher's back were a pair of leather-like wings, and her eyes darkened into nearly pure black. “Well shit,” he muttered, diving out of the way just as the woman lunged at him.
He crawled behind a few paintings, noticing that one of them was some priceless thing he’d seen in a magazine once. Hopefully, that wouldn’t be ruined if that thing came for him again.
Well, Sirius really should have stopped hoping at that point because the stack of paintings that he’d been hiding behind came crashing down and he rolled away just in time so he wasn’t crushed. His heart felt like it was in his throat and he truly had no idea what was happening right then.
The creature - which Sirius had to remind himself had been his math teacher only moments ago - came after him again and Sirius bolted for the door, he reached it only in time for it to be swung open and come face to face with Professor McGonagall.
“Professor! Holy shit!” Sirius breathed, only to be given a small smile and have a pen shoved into his hands. The door was slammed shut again and Sirius turned to find himself backed into the corner by the creature.
“Oh what a pity indeed,” Carrow grinned, and Sirius noted how pointy her teeth now were.
What the hell was he supposed to do with a pen? And why had his favorite teacher just locked him in a room with some kind of demon from hell? Was he really that bad of a student?
“Alrighty I’m not going down without a fight here,” Sirius grimaced, uncapping the pen to attempt to stab the thing with - only to find that (conveniently) the moment he pulled the cap off the pen grew into a sword. “Well, this certainly isn’t the strangest thing that’s happened today…” Sirius said to himself, swinging the blade at the winged math teacher from hell. Suddenly incredibly grateful for the fencing lessons that Orion forced him to take the year before. He’d have to remember to thank him while he was being screamed at that night.
The blade connected with the flesh on Carrow’s wing and she screeched, Sirius took this opportunity to take another stab at it and swung again - this time hitting her leg. With another screech, Carrow quite suddenly burst into dust and was gone, leaving Sirius breathing heavily with a sword in his hand.
Had he just murdered his math teacher?
This was going to be hard to be a hard explain.
☪
“I didn’t hit them!” Sirius pleaded, trying once again to explain what had happened to his mother and Orion. “I didn’t I swear!”
“Stop lying Sirius,” his mother warned him again. “Just tell us the truth and you can leave.”
“I am telling the truth!” Sirius instated, flinching away when Orion raised his hand at him again and ducked when it came down to hit him. “Okay okay fine! Fine, I hit them. There. I said it.”
“Good,” Orion glared, clasping his hands together.
“You’ll be lucky if we can find another school that will take you now,” his mother huffed, taking a seat at the dining room table.
After the incident, Sirius had found that he was in fact expelled from Durmstrang and he would no longer be allowed to attend. Which for that year was not a big deal for him considering there had only been a week left of the school year before they were on summer vacation. This development had however gotten him into far more trouble with his parents considering his story was just another ‘figment of his imagination’ because when he’d returned from the storage room no one even seemed to remember they’d had a teacher named Ms. Carrow.
“I’m sure I could pull a few strings darling,” Orion assured, and Sirius scoffed. “Something you’d like to say to me, boy?”
“No,” Sirius crossed his arms. “I’m going to my room.”
“Et,” his mother scolded. “What do you say to Orion for making sure this didn’t turn into a bit problem?”
“Thank you for doing the bare minimum then coming home and backhanding me,” Sirius spat, mustering all of his courage to do so.
Orion pushed himself up and suddenly Sirius hit a wall, “You will not speak to me like that boy.”
“Oh fuck you,” Sirius glowered, narrowing his eyes. Just begging for the man to hit him hard enough to cut his cheek, that was all he needed. All Sirius needed to be pushed over the edge and fight back. Just one cut.
But instead, Sirius was shoved down the hallway toward his room, “you’re not to leave your room until I say so. And your brother will receive the same treatment for your actions.”
Sirius’ heart sank, he’d never meant to get regulus’ into trouble. “But-”
“Silence,” Orion pushed him through the threshold of his room and took hold of the door handle. “Disobey me and there will be punishment Sirius. We must learn how to keep you in line somehow.” And the door was shut in his face.
“Fuck,” Sirius cursed to himself, feeling the stinging of tears in his eyes. He flopped onto his bed and pulled out the burner phone he’d bought himself a few weeks ago after his other one had almost exploded in a lightning storm.
He dialed the only number he knew by heart and waited as the phone rang three times before someone picked up, “Hello?” James’ voice was groggy on the other end of the line.
“James?” Sirius bit back tears.
“Shit Sirius,” James seemed more awake now. “What’s wrong?”
“Can you come and pick me up? I just… give me like half an hour to get everything together, I need to take care of a few things. I’m bringing Regulus.”
“Sirius, is this you saying you’re running away?” James inquired, but Sirius didn’t answer. They both knew the answer to that question. “Okay I’ll be there on the corner at one, don’t make me wait too long.”
Sirius hummed in approval before pressing the red ‘hang-up’ button, he then proceeded to throw a few tee shirts and jeans into a duffle bag, taking only what he really loved and leaving the rest behind. He took his swimming medal, and his skating trophy - those being the only two sports he was good at. He unpinned the few pictures he had above his desk and tossed them in, most of which being of him and Regulus, a few of him, Lily, and James mixed in. He pulled on his converse and grabbed the burner off his covers before realizing he should probably leave a note.
Dear mother and Orion (I refuse to call you my father),
I’ve decided to no take your bullshit anymore and run away, I made the conscious decision to bring along Regulus - which I’m aware is kidnapping but I don’t think you necessarily care. Do not worry about us, we are safe. Hope you have a shitty rest of your lives,
Xx Sirius Black
P.S - please don’t call the cops I really don’t feel like being returned to your custody
He nodded once to himself, he hoped all the letters were in the right spots, and it wasn’t illegible. But Sirius didn’t have much time to worry about that now, it was 12:34 now, which meant he had like half an hour to convince regulus to come with him, pack his bag, and get down to the street corner all while not being caught by Orion or Walburga.
Piece of cake right?
Wrong.
Sirius almost got caught on step one!
He opened the door to his room and realized both adults were still in the kitchen - which meant he had to be extra quiet while making his way over to Regulus’ room down the hall, and they would have to take the fire escape out of the building because the front door was only accessible through the kitchen. He’d stepped on the creaky floorboard and had to press himself up against a wall so that he wasn’t seen.
Regulus was sitting on his bed trying to read a book with Sirius slipped inside with his duffle bag.
“Pack,” he said simply, “we’re leaving right now.”
“What?” Regulus asked quickly, sitting up in bed and discarding the book (which was funny to Sirius because Regulus was just as dyslexic as he was if not more.)
“I said we’re leaving Reggie,” Sirius repeated, opening his closet and retrieving a backpack. “I can’t take it anymore, and even if we only get out for a little while it’ll be good you know?”
“I-I guess,” Regulus looked at him with wide eyes. Sirius pulled him into his arms for a quick hug and gave him a good squeeze before letting go.
“Now get everything you don’t want to leave behind okay?” Regulus nodded tentatively and quickly went around his room, gathering up a few little sketchbooks and pencils from various places. “Got everything?” Sirius asked after a few minutes as he folded up one last pair of jeans and put them into the backpack. Regulus nodded again and Sirius smiled gently.
“Where are we going?” Regulus asked quietly as Sirius opened his window and threw the bags out onto the metal fire escape.
“You remember James?” another nod, “he’s got a car, and he’s going to come and get us okay?”
“Sirius. James is thirteen,” Regulus pointed out.
“Yes and you’re twelve, would you rather drive the getaway car yourself?” Regulus pondered for a moment before shaking his head no. “That’s what I thought, now come on.”
The brothers climbed out the window and closed it gently behind them. Sirius wasn’t sure why bad things happened to him, but when he had a choice he was never going to allow them to. Especially not when Regulus was involved. Nothing touched his little brother without consequences. Nothing.