When the snap resonated through the desolated planet, Peter’s eyes immediately searched for you. Flying back to Tony, he was panicked and out of breath by your sight. You were hurt, badly hurt - blood spilling from a deep wound in your stomach, bruises all over your faces, your mouth letting thigh but worrisome red strings. Your breathing was too slow for his liking and when your teary eyes looked up at him, he felt his heart fall inside his chest.
“Y/N-” Peter pushed his mentor out of his way, barely registering the violence of his action as Tony stumble to his side.
His hands were quick to press on your wound, trying to stop the bleeding. He didn’t know how you got like this, especially when Tony promised to keep you both safe. But rational thinking was left out of his mind for paranoia ever since you followed him onto that ship. Why didn’t you just stayed back? His lips started pouting as his eyes burn, threatening to cry. Because you didn’t want him to be alone.
“I- I’m okay-” You barely managed, your teeth redden from the wounds of previous punches and kicks. “I-” Your voice stopped as you saw your new companions starting to fade, one by one.
“Peter-”
You tried to attract his eyes on the tragedy happening but all he could think about was the blood on his hands and the flow not stopping. He couldn’t bring himself to let his eyes off of you for one second.
“Kid, hang on, you’ll be fine.” Tony came, out of his suit to try to replace his hands on you but he was stubborn. “Peter-”
“No!” His childish whim to be the one to save you made him push Tony away, his hands slipping back on your skin as he tried to put pressure back on you. He was responsible, if not for him, you’d be fine. As always. You always did your best to be here for him. And what did he do for you?
But he only felt his breath being knocked out of him. What could he possibly do?
“Oh, shit-” Starlord started cursing by your side before he too was the last one to vanish. The last one, Peter repeated. No one else will disappear. No one-
“Peter..?” Your voice was strangely low, full of pain. Your eyes were locked on your trembling hand. Peter’s hands slipped as he saw the tips of your fingers slowly fading. It was slow and retarded, probably by the panic slowly building inside you. Your eyes turned back to him, all your attention and focus on him. Like he was the one you knew could help, the one who could save you.
“No, no, no, no-” His voice shook as Tony covered his eyes in despair.
“Kid-” The adult tried to stop him but you were already falling, Peter barely catching you.
“Peter, I- Please don’t leave me alone.” Was your whisper. You spoke as if you accepted that you’ll be dead soon. Hell, you were! Peter thought, in full denial, completely ignoring your forearm now full disappeared.
“Shut up, you’re fine- We’ll get you home, just hold on-” He tried to force you on your feet but your sole arm could barely hold your whole numbing body onto his shoulder.
“Peter..” You called for him to look at you but he wouldn’t. He couldn’t. He couldn’t see who like this, fully aware that this, this was his fault.
“Just-”
“Peter, if you don’t hug me right now, I think I might fall apart.”
Silence was heavy as he stared at your wound. So much blood was now on his hand, literally and figuratively, he felt as if he was fading with you. It took Tony’s hand to touch his shoulder for him to look up. Your eyes were still as bright as when he found you. Swallowing his sobs, he felt the tears rolling down his chest as he finally let go of your wounds to spread his arms around your back.
He held you close, as close as he could. Your heartbeat was slow against his erratic one. Your hand was shaking as it clenches to his suit. Even if you were the one in pain and aware of your upcoming disappearing, he was the one sobbing into your arms. How pathetic, he thought. But he still held you. He held you until he felt his arms close on the void of your empty seat.
His head lifted in a panic to see you but he barely caught your sad eyes before you were gone, your voice disappearing with the last flying ashes.
“I’m sorry, Peter.”
Looking down on his hands, Peter felt his numb heart clenching in his chest. Blood was mixed with the last reminder of your being. His head started to hurt from all the crying and thinking he did. He could faintly hear Tony trying to call for him, his hands dragging him to the ship - the dark-eyed woman looking at him weirdly. Was she pitying him? Probably. He was pretty pitiful. Pathetic. Childish. But he couldn’t care anymore.
He just lost his other half and it was all on him.