Chapter 1
“Grant look! It’s reindeer’s!.” You cheered, showing off the seasonal animals to your little boy. You were both currently making your way through “Santa’s Grotto”. Grant was having the time of his little life, not being able to move his curious blue eyes quickly enough. “Look at the pwetty lights Mummy!” Grant gasped. Enamored by all the fairy lights delicately placed around the decorated waiting room.
You had been in line for about an hour and you guys were now fourth in the queue. “Santa better give us a new Ipad,” you muttered under your breath. After listening to the same 4 Christmas songs on repeat. The never-ending jingling of bells for the past hour. You were more excited than Grant to meet Santa.
Shuffling forward to third place you felt a change in the atmosphere. The Christmas spirit was quickly dwindling. Eyes darting around the room to try and identify the reason for this shift. You heard a sharp intake of breath coming from the jittering boy by your feet. “PAPA!” Grant cried, taking off in a run.
“Hey, there little man! Did you miss Papa?” he cooed, picking up your son and giving him a cuddle. Your blood went cold, looking up you made eye contact with him. The man you had tried so desperately and tirelessly to get away from. You chewed at your bottom lip as Bucky made his way over to you. Grant smiling and chattering away to him in his strong grip.
“Mama look! Papa came back! I told you he would” Your oblivious baby celebrated.
“How about you Mama, did you miss Papa?” Bucky asked, his voice deep and gruff.
Putting on a fake smile for the benefit of your son you grinned. “Of course I did! What a nice surprise.”
“Santa must have read my letter already! I asked for papa to come back!.” Grant revealed to you both.
Your heart shattered at your son’s revelation, he loved his father. Bucky had become his whole world. The pair were the best of friends, it had torn you apart to separate the two but you knew Bucky was dangerous. You had to do what was best for your son’s future, no matter how much of a doting father James was.
Bucky shifted Grant in his arms, pulling the boy closer to his chest. “I’ll never leave you again baby” Bucky whispered soothingly before pressing a kiss to Grant’s head. He brought those cold eyes to meet yours and a shiver passed through you. Bucky could always put the fear of God in you without even saying a word. You were going to be punished as soon as Grant was away from you both.
Before you could say anything to try and diffuse the man’s anger. A cheery voice calls from behind you, “Who’s ready to meet Santa!”
—-
“I’ll put him to bed” Bucky grunted, protectively holding your sleeping son to his chest. You smiled at the sight of him and the sounds of his cute snores. You nodded at him before moving to put away the toys Bucky had spoiled Grant with earlier that day. “His room has dinosaurs on the door”.
“Obviously” you hear Bucky say with a smile behind you. Listening to him struggle to keep his heavy footsteps quiet. So as not to disturb the toddler currently drooling on his jumper.
Your palms started to sweat. Chest tightening and heart speeding up as you were left alone with your thoughts. Bucky’s favorite way to torture you. You had never disobeyed Bucky like this, you had no idea how he was going to react. I mean you took his son away! For good reason but James wouldn’t see it that way. Not in his deranged mind.
You jumped, realizing the man on your mind was standing in the doorway behind you. “Did you really think I’d let you take my family away from me?.” He said lowly, stalking toward you. Backing you up until you were trapped between the sink and his large frame.
“Bucky… Please, I did it for a reason” you stuttered. “I didn’t want to take Grant from you but you gave me no choice! Life with you was becoming unbearable, You wouldn’t let me do anything. I couldn’t even take Grant to the park without you! I had to get out. I only wanted to protect our son.” Gripping onto Bucky’s forearms as you spoke, trying to make the man understand your actions.
Bucky was silent. Fear’s ice-cold grip squeezed your heart as his hand reached up. Stroking your cheek he leaned forward and whispered in your ear, “You will never leave me again Ma.” Pulling you into his arms and taking a hold of your chin he pressed his lips against yours. Pushing his tongue into your mouth, his hands started wandering.
Smiling as he pulled away leaving you breathless as he always did, “I love you so much Ma. Our next baby is going to be as beautiful as Grant”