Shattered

Hours later found her still sitting by the pool, toying with one of her knives (she’d summoned one once she’d gathered up enough energy) and staring at the wall distantly. She’d gotten up, at some point, and grabbed a couple of fruits and bits of food to eat- she’d been starting to legitimately worry about the lack of food and started looking then. She’d managed to wrangle her hair into something at least vaguely resembling neat and forced it up into a bun. Maybe she would sleep later, but probably not. She had better things to do.

Hulk had come back from his training with the Scrapper about an hour ago, grinning from ear to ear and bantering playfully with his friend. He’d given her a lot to think about, when they’d talked earlier- surprising, and probably not on purpose, but the fact remained. And she’d put together some semblance of a plan.

She needed to talk to her brother. The small one. Loki. She needed to know what had happened to Asgard since she’d left it- and possibly ask him what had possessed him to try to conquer Midgard. Sure, it was something she would do (needlesssuffering, said the voice that was becoming more and more a part of her with every passing minute), but why Midgard? Why not this stupid trash planet, if that was what he enjoyed? Where had he gotten the army? 

And she was going to have a talk with the Scrapper. At some point. She needed to know who she was- she’d thought about it, briefly, while Hulk had been gone, but it was pointless. She knew she was familiar, knew she’d fought with her at some point (or against her?), but that was where her memory failed. It wasn’t overly important to her plan, of course, but it was still aggravating her, and she needed to get it out of her mind.

She was going to get out of here and back to Asgard. One of the portals in the sky would work- and she would need a ship for that. That was another reason she needed to talk to the Scrapper or Loki (or both). They were both close with the Grandmaster, they would know which ship to take and how to get it. Loki might be more amenable to her cause. She didn’t think the Scrapper liked her very much.

“Death Lady.” She jolted out of her thoughts and looked up- Hulk was sitting down next to her.

“Hello.”

“Death Lady sad?”

She scowled. “I don’t get sad. I’m just thinking.”

“Hulk get sad. Sad and mad. Sometimes sad makes more mad and bad smash.”

Maybe, she thought, he wasn’t that dumb. Not smart, but not dumb either. Some of the things he said could be… enlightening.

“Mm. I’ll keep that in mind.” She sighed, leaning back to lay down on the floor. “Hulk?”

“Yes?”

“I need a favor.”

-----------------------------

Hulk wouldn’t let her hurt the ‘angry girl’, no matter how much she tried to convince him otherwise. He would, however, get her into the room and therefore force her to listen. That was close enough.

She had no way of getting to Loki, unless she wanted to go fight in the arena again, and her ribs still hurt. So Scrapper it was.

“Hey, Big guy! Ready to go?”

“Big guy?”

He shuffled over to stand in front of the doorframe, leaving her face to face with Hela. Scrapper shot an annoyed look back at Hulk, who seemed to look a little ashamed.

Good to know that he was loyal, even if it was to some Scrapper.

“We need to talk.”

“No we don’t. Hulk, let me go.”

“Death Lady wants to talk.”

“And Angry Girl doesn’t. Move.”

“No! Stay!”

She scowled, then turned to Hela, who forced a smirk onto her face. “Come now. I just want to know who you are. And also borrow one of the Grandmaster’s ships.”

“I’m not letting you get back to Asgard, you wretch.”

“Well, if you don’t, I’ll take it by force. You just have to tell me who you are-”

Scrapper whipped around and shoved her, hard, and Hela stumbled back a few steps. “You want to know who I am?” she hissed, grabbing her shirt and pressing her against the glass, holding her there by her neck with her forearm.

Hela scowled, and opened her mouth to admonish her or ask to let her breathe, when her eye caught on something. Her eyes widened, and she wheezed, “You’re a Valkyrie?”

The Scrapper dropped her so fast she didn’t have time to catch herself before falling to the floor. “I was. Guess who screwed that up for me?”

Hela scowled. “I thought I killed you all.”

“You thought wrong,” Scra- Valkyrie snapped. 

Hela examined her closer- now that she knew she was a Valkyrie, she was sure she could place… Ingrid? No, that was the other- Brunn something. Brunn… “Brunnhilde!”

“Finally remembered, have you?” she scowled. “And don’t call me that. That name died when my sisters did.”

“Fine. What are you doing here?”

“Drinking.”

“Yes, I can see that. You know, technically, I’m the queen. You’re sworn to listen to me.”

“I’m not sworn to do anything for you, Your Majesty. You slaughtered your own people. You slaughtered your own warriors. The Valkyrie fought for you for years-”

“And yet they turned against me when I-”

“When you tried to take over Asgard! And then you killed them!”

“Because they tried to stop me from breaking out of that horrid prison! You would have done the same, Brunnhilde, don’t act like you wouldn’t kill everyone in this bloody place if you had to!”

She didn’t see the fist coming at her face until it was too late (damn, she needed to work on her reflexes.) By the time she regained her bearings, Brunnhilde was straddling her and driving a fist into her ribs. She grabbed her wrist and flung her into the jacuzzi.

The Valkyrie climbed out, soaking wet and clenching her teeth tight, and held up the fob hanging from her belt. “Don’t you dare-”

She was cut off by the now familiar shock running throughout her body, and crumpled back down to the floor. Brunnhilde stalked back over to her, smirking. “I win.”

“You cheated.”

“You killed my sisters.”

“You caused me to be locked up in Hel for another millenia.”

“That doesn’t make us even.”

“You sold me to a maniac to fight in death matches. If that doesn’t make us even, I don’t know what will.”

“Maybe I should kill your brothers too.”

“Go ahead. I won’t miss them.”

They glared at each other, before Brunnhilde turned on her heel and stalked out of the door. Hulk didn’t stop her.

Time for a new plan.

-------------------------

Several painful shocks later, she decided that simply ripping the disk out of her neck was not going to work. Plan C.

----------------------

Ok. Screaming for the guards and knocking them all out and making a run for it didn’t do it, either. She wished Hulk had told her she’d get shocked when she ran out of the door.

At the very least, he could have refrained from laughing.

-------------------------

The next day, she fought a couple of gladiators in the arena, making easy work of them. Korg waved to her when she passed by and gave her two thumbs up. She took this to be a good thing, and nodded (reluctantly) in his general direction.

Hulk hadn’t fought that day- it wasn’t a main event day- so he was still waiting for her when she got back. They tossed a ball back and forth for longer than she cared to admit, her brain running through plan after plan before discarding them nearly as quickly as they were drawn up. Hulk had just dropped the ball, and was running after it, when she thought of something.

“Hulk?”

“Mm.”

“How did you get here?”

“Quinjet.”

“Ok. What, exactly, is a quinjet?”

“Ship.”

Yes. Perfect. “Where is it? Is it still here?”

He gave up chasing after the ball, and made his way to the window. She got to her feet and joined him. He pointed out a ship sitting outside. “Quinjet.”

Great. A ship. Now… well, now she needed a way to get to it. And to get this thing out of her neck.

Brunnhilde would not be reasoned with. She’d stopped by earlier to bring Hulk to training- she’d zapped her immediately when she tried to go closer. And, later, while she’d been fighting, she’d seen a glimpse of her up in her ship. She kept up a stream of steady (but thankfully low-powered) shocks going throughout the entire fight.

“How do you stop Bru- Angry Girl from being mad at you.”

“Angry Girl not get mad at Hulk.”

“Mm. But surely she gets mad at other people, if you call her ‘Angry Girl’.”

“She get angry. Not get mad at people. Not hating. Except you.”

Well, wonderful. 

“What did you do?”

She tensed a bit, then relaxed- Hulk’s expression was simple curiosity. She thought about it for a bit, then said, “I killed some people that were important to her. They- made me mad, and I, ah, killed them. I didn’t even know she’d survived.”

Hulk grunted, and plopped down next to her. “Bad smash?”

“Hm. Yes, I suppose it was.” Was it? She- ok, maybe the Valkyrie hadn’t exactly deserved to get slaughtered, and it wasn’t exactly a fair fight, but- but she’d been in Hel. She’d wanted to get out and they’d been in her way. Though she couldn’t blame them, either. It was Odin’s fault.

Everything seemed to boil down to being Odin’s fault, in the end.

“Throw ball?”

Hulk sat back down across from her, holding up the ball.

She sighed. “Sure, big guy.”

----------------------

“And another stunning performance by Lady Death, let’s give it up for her! That’s all for today, folks, come back next time for another appearance by our champion….”

She didn’t hear the rest, too busy wrestling the stupid helmet off of her head (she was feeling much stronger now, and the headache only really came back when she was in the arena, but she still couldn’t summon up her armor) and collapsing down to the ground. These fights were always tiring- the Grandmaster usually had her fighting multiple opponents, often sending more in when the others were finished, and Brunnhilde was still shocking her at regular intervals during the fights, taking away a large amount of her concentration (A real warrior doesn’t get distracted, real warriors don’t feel pain, and you want to live up to your name, don’t you? She wished Odin’s voice weren’t an ever present track in the back of her head, but was grateful that it had quieted so that where once it was a constantly jabbering nuisance it now only surfaced occasionally). She had been on Sakaar for a week now (or however long it had been- Hulk said time was weird here), and was still no closer to figuring out how, exactly, to get off of the stupid planet. She had a plan, she just couldn’t implement it without Brunnhilde or Loki, and both were very stubbornly avoiding her (but of course, both came to the arena to watch her fight- Brunnhilde because she got to shock her and Loki because, well, she didn’t know. He enjoyed watching the sport?)

Still, she was trying to find a way to do it without them, staying up all night and day thinking about it. Who needed sleep, anyway? (She did. Kind of desperately at this point. But that didn't matter.)

“Good fight. Reckon the Grandmaster will let you have another go at the champion?”

She sighed as Korg came up to her. She wasn’t sure, yet, whether or not she was thankful the Grandmaster hadn’t yet made her fight him. “Maybe. Not yet.”

“Oh, alright! Hey-”

“Bye!”

“Bye, scary lady!”

Norns damn that stupid pile of rocks for making her smile.

When she got back up to her room, Hulk was sitting with Brunnhilde, who scowled and got up to leave when she walked in. “Angry Girl! Stay?”

Hela saw her expression soften, and she went to go sit back down by Hulk. Hela sighed, and took off her armor, making her way to the jacuzzi. Not bothering to take anything but the metal and padding off, she sunk into the water fully clothed.

Honestly? I could get used to this. Just for the jacuzzi.

“You know, you’re supposed to take your clothes off when you get in the water, Majesty.”

“You know, you’re supposed to not shock the contestants while they’re fighting.”

“Oh, you’ll win anyway. Hey big guy, pass me that- thanks.” She didn’t have to open her eyes to know that Brunnhilde had gotten her hands on another bottle.

“You know drinking is bad for you.”

“You know murder is bad for you too.”

“Says who?”

“Says the people who get murdered.”

“Well, just for the record, the only people I’ve killed since getting out of Hel have been the ones I was told to kill. You know, by the man you sold me to?”

“And those scrappers.”

Oh. Yes. She’d forgotten about them.

“They were trying to eat me, that doesn’t count.”

“Eh. I’ll give you that one.”

They all sat in silence for a few moments, and Hela enjoyed it immensely until it was interrupted again. “Death Lady say sorry.”

She opened an eye. “What?”

“Death Lady say sorry for smashing Angry Girl’s family.”

“I won’t apologize for defending myself.”

“And I won’t apologize for trying to stop a madwoman from breaking out of her prison.”

“Well, I won’t apologize for being what my father made me.”

“That’s not an excuse.”

“I’m not using it as an excuse.”

“Yes you are.”

“Well, how is it my fault?”

“You’re deranged.”

“You’re a useless drunk.”

“You’re a bitch.”

“Oh, no, I’m hurt. Get a medic.”

“Shut up.”

“Fine.”

“You said it was bad smash,” Hulk frowned, and she sighed again, opening both eyes this time. 

“Yes, it was. But there was a reason for it.”

“No good reason for bad smash.”

“No? Then why did you blame the scary red lady for when you screwed up?”

Hulk stomped his foot on the ground in frustration. “Red Lady not blamed. Hulk did the smash. Team should not be mad at Hulk when not his fault. But Hulk still say sorry.”

She and Brunnhilde both looked at him, and Brunnhilde snorted softly. “When did you get so smart, big guy?”

“Hulk always smart.”

No one said anything for a while, and Hela leaned back and tilted her eyes towards the ceiling. Should she- no. No, right? She didn’t- it wasn’t- but-

Why did developing a conscience have to be so confusing? (When had she started developing a conscience?) Couldn’t she just go back to fighting and killing anything that got in her way?

She could. She could forget this and kill Brunnhilde right now and take her device away. She’d risk getting kicked around by Hulk, but she was stronger now, she could make it to the ship in time to get off of Sakaar and take over Asgard. It would be easy. 

Then why didn’t she?

She wasn’t entirely sure. She felt- she didn’t feel content, exactly. She couldn’t remember ever feeling truly content with life. But this was as close as she’d ever gotten, or at least she thought. She hadn’t had the urge to kill anyone recently (except in the arena, but that didn’t count), not even Brunnhilde. Of course, there was still the underlying current of rage that boiled in her, but it wasn’t overwhelming. It wasn’t clouding her every thought until that was the only thing she could think of. It was controllable, and now that it was, it was easier to see things clearly. The rage, of course, would always be there (she hadn’t yet learned to live without it), but right at that moment, she could ignore it.

And so, instead of taking down Brunnhilde and slaughtering the whole city and then moving on to Asgard like she would have a week ago, she closed her eyes, before lifting up her head and looking directly at where Brunnhilde and Hulk were sitting.

“I’m sorry.”