On Our Way To Nowhere

Peter slept like a baby, although in Tony’s eyes, he was still a baby. 

After the incident in the jungle, Tony brought Peter back to the beach and after changing into dry clothes and eating some papayas, bananas and mangos for dinner, Tony held Peter in his arms and gently brushed his hand over Peter’s eyes and the boy was asleep within three minutes. 

Tony carefully laid him down on his side of their bed and laid down next to him. The sun was just starting to set but it was okay because Peter needed the extra hours of sleep. 

At home, Tony struggled with putting Peter to sleep and getting him to actually stay asleep. He  was up about three to five times throughout the night and he didn’t know how to self soothe himself back to sleep, so Tony had to wake up and put him back to sleep every time. 

On the island, it was double the amount of times Peter was waking up, making it impossible for him to get a full twelve hours of sleep. 

Tonight however, Peter was exhausted and it seemed like he was going to sleep for the whole night. 

At least Tony hoped so. He stayed awake himself until the sun had set and then for another hour after that. He ended up falling asleep pretty quickly once he shut his eyes. 

.

.

.

Peter had way too much energy for Tony’s liking. 

The eight year old was crawling around in the sand then running into the ocean and letting himself get dragged in by the waves before he was crawling out again. 

Tony watched him for a good hour, occasionally picking Peter up and giving him a tickle attack. It brought Tony some happiness to see that Peter was happy but a million other thoughts were running through his mind like why the hell weren’t they rescued yet. 

Tony didn’t know what to do. Their plane was split in half, completely useless to them. All Tony could do was keep Peter safe and alive until rescue came but rescue didn’t seem to be coming any time soon. 

“Pete, come sit with me for a bit.” Tony patted the spot next to him in the shade, under a palm tree. Peter ran over to him, smiling but was wheezing and Tony knew it was because Peter was playing too much without a break with a mixture of the heat. 

He pulled the inhaler from his pocket and held it up to Peter’s lips. “Breathe in and hold it. Good. One more time.” 

Peter did, having been so used to using an inhaler by now. He usually did it by himself at school but he never really needed to. He needed to do it a lot more on the island. Peter leaned his head against his dad’s arm. “I really want a big bowl of ice cream right now.” 

Tony chuckled and wrapped an arm around Peter. “Oh yeah. Chocolate or vanilla?” 

Peter grinned. “Definitely chocolate.” 

“I knew it.” Tony knew it. Chocolate was Peter’s go-to for everything. 

The two of them sat in silence for the next few minutes, both thinking of different things. After a bit, Peter turned so he could lay his head on his dad’s thigh. “I miss Pepper. Do you think she misses us?” 

Tony ran his fingers through Peter’s curls. “I know she does. She’s not going to stop looking for us until we’re back home, don’t worry.” 

Peter hoped that was soon. He missed everything and everyone. He was lucky he had his dad with him though. 

“Maybe she’ll come and maybe she’ll bring us chocolate ice cream.” Both of them bursted out into a fit of laughter and continued joking about everything and anything until it was starting to get later out, around lunch time Tony would guess. 

He sent Peter to have some quiet time in their tent for forty minutes, just so Peter could lie down and rest and if he fell asleep in that time, good. 

Tony knew there were wild chickens roaming the jungle. He’s seen them while going pee or taking Peter for a pee. He also heard them at night so he planned on catching one. 

Never has he ever caught an animal before, or killed one for that matter. He accidentally hit a raccoon in the car once and he felt guilty about it but this wasn’t for him, it was for Peter. 

Peter needed to eat. He needed protein. He needed something to help him grow and keep him strong until they’re rescued. Tony didn’t want to kill a chicken for lunch but he had to. 

He looked towards the tent, hoping Peter stayed in there while he went to go check the trap that he had previously set that morning while Peter was still sleeping. 

Please let there be a chicken in there, Tony thought to himself as he walked the short distance in the jungle towards his trap. 

He felt relief wash over him when he saw the chicken in the basket trap he made. He didn’t even know what he was doing but it apparently worked. 

Tony kneeled down and lifted the basket up, quickly grabbing the chicken and preparing to snap its neck when he heard someone run up behind him. He turned around and saw Peter. 

“Daddy? Is that a chicken?” Peter asked, slowly but curiously making his way towards the wild animal in his dad’s arms. 

“Yeah. It is.” 

Peter smiled and reached out to pet it. “Did you catch him for me? My new pet?” 

Tony’s heart broke. He didn’t want to tell Peter but he had to. “No, baby. It’s for us to eat. We need prot-” 

Peter backed away from him and screamed, his face morphing into an expression Tony had never seen on his son before. “No! You can’t! He’s a living thing. He wants to live!” 

“Peter-” 

“No! Let him go. Let him go, daddy!” Peter rushed towards his dad and smacked his arm. “Let him go! He’s scared! He doesn’t wanna die!” 

Tony held the chicken tighter. “Peter, stop. We need to eat it-” 

“No! He doesn’t wanna get eaten!” Peter screamed, tears streaming down his face as he punched and kicked at his dad to free the animal. 

“It’s an animal!” Tony shouted back. 

Peter grabbed onto his dad’s arm and bit down. Hard. He didn’t have his two front teeth so there wasn’t much to bite down on but he worked with what he had. His dad dropped the chicken from the sudden pain so Peter tried to help it run away. “Run, chicken! Run away to your mommy!” 

After Tony recovered from his bite, he grabbed Peter by the arm. “Why did you do that, Peter?! Fuck!” Tony roughly let go of Peter and ran his hands through his hair, picking up a rock and throwing it. “Fuck!” 

Peter cried harder. “Stop yelling at me! You’re saying naughty words and I don’t like it!” 

Tony was too angry to see that he was upsetting Peter. He walked over to him and kneeled down in front of him, grabbing onto Peter. “You have to understand that we have to eat! No ones coming! We’ve been here for a week and no ones come! We can’t survive on… fruit anymore, Peter.” 

Peter sobbed out. “You’re scaring me!” 

Tony let go of Peter and stood back up, covering his face with his hands. He didn’t know what to do. He felt like he was going crazy. “Okay. I’m sorry. I’m sorry, baby. Come here.” 

Tony held his arms out for Peter but he shook his head, looking at Tony as if he were about to kill him. Tony thought that he must look pretty terrifying to his eight year old son right now and he immediately felt bad. 

“Oh, buddy. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” Tony got on his knees so he was at Peter’s height. “Baby boy, come here. Daddy’s sorry, okay? I’m just… I’m really scared.” 

Peter hesitated but he couldn’t resist a hug so he got into his dad's arms, letting himself feel safe. “You’re scared?” 

Tony didn’t want to try and hide it anymore. He nodded, smelling Peter’s hair and despite having only bathed in the ocean for a week, he still smelt like Peter. “Yeah, I am. I’m scared because I don’t know why no ones come for us yet.” 

“I don’t know. Maybe-maybe they forgot about us.” Peter thought. He didn’t understand. 

That brought a tiny smile to Tony’s lips. “No, baby. No one forgot about us. They’re just having a hard time, that’s all. Rescue will come soon.” 

Peter nodded, believing his dad. 

Tony patted his butt. “You ready to go back to the beach?” 

Peter giggled and moved away from his dad’s hands. “Yeah. No eating chickens?” 

Tony wanted to say no but he didn’t want to upset Peter, knowing it would completely destroy the eight year old if Tony killed the chicken. He assumed that Peter would refuse to eat it anyways. 

“I promise. Let’s go.” The father took his son's hand and led them back to the beach. 

It was another meal of fresh fruit but at least Peter ate it. 

Later that day, Peter was playing by the edge of the jungle while his dad washed their clothes in the ocean. Usually Peter would help him or be there while he takes a bath in the ocean but he was feeling incredibly hot from spending too much time in the sun. 

His dad waved to him so Peter waved back and leaned against his knees that were pulled against his chest. He sighed. He missed Pepper and he really wanted his toys to play with too. 

Peter leaned back and looked up at the trees above him, trying to imagine if he were at the park down the street from his house or on vacation, not stuck on some deserted island in the middle of nowhere. 

The bushes started moving behind him so Peter snapped his head to see what was there. “Hello?” 

He turned around and sat up on his knees then the whispering started again. Peter was immediately standing up and running into the bushes to see what or who was making that sound. “Hello? Who’s there?” 

Peter climbed across a fallen log and around a tree then he spotted Mary standing a few feet away from him. He stopped. “Hey, what’d you want? Are you even real?” 

Mary turned to face him with a gentle smile. “Don’t you understand, Peter?” Peter scrunched his nose up in confusion. “None of this is real. Can't you see that?” 

“You’re lying. I know you’re lying.” Peter didn’t understand but he knew this… whoever this person was, was lying to him. “Stop it!” 

“You never crashed on the island because you never even made it on the plane.” 

Peter shook his head. “No. Then why am I here? The plane did crash and now we’re stuck here.” 

Mary shook her head, stepping closer to Peter. “I’m not lying to you. I can prove it.” She held her hand out towards Peter but he took a step back. “Your father doesn’t believe you, make him believe you.” 

“How?” Peter asked, tilting his head with curiosity. 

“Take my hand. Follow me.” Mary walked closer to Peter. He hesitated, not wanting to leave without his dad but if he could make his dad believe him then he would follow her. 

He took her hand and they walked for quite a long distance. Peter began getting tired but then they walked out of the jungle and out on a cliff, looking out to the waters below. Peter pulled his hand away from her. “What’re you doing?” 

Mary continued walking towards the edge of the cliff. “It’s the only way, Peter. Whatever it takes.” 

Peter didn’t want to. “I should go back now…” 

“Don’t you get it yet, this isn’t real. None of this is real and you have to see that. Wake up, Peter it’s time to wake up.” Mary walked to the very edge of the cliff and turned around to face Peter. “You need to wake up and then will all be over.” 

She put her arms out and fell back. Peter screamed. He ran towards the edge of the cliff and looked down but he couldn’t see her on the rocks or in the water below. “Mary?! Mary!” 

“Peter?” Tony ran out of the jungle but immediately stopped as he approached Peter near the edge of the cliff. “Peter, what’re you doing? Back away from there.” 

Peter turned around to face his dad. He wiped at the tears falling down his face. “Why don’t you believe me?” 

Tony slowly walked towards Peter, his heart beating so quickly in his chest. “I do. I do believe you, baby. Come here.” 

Peter shook his head and took another step back so Tony stopped walking. “No you don’t. None-none of this is real. I’m just… I’m just dreaming and I wanna wake up. I wanna go home.” 

“Baby. Peter, we will. Okay? We’ll go home together but how will we get home if you fall off the cliff. Just come to me. I’m not mad at you.” Tony held out his arms for Peter but Peter didn’t make any move to get closer. 

“No! We can’t. I have to do this.” Peter turned and looked towards the cliff. Mary said this would make his dad believe him about the boat they had to go to and the whispering but Peter didn’t understand how. He turned to face his dad. “I’m scared, daddy. I wanna go home.” 

Tony nodded eagerly. “Yes. We will. Come here, Peter.” He held his arms out for Peter and this time Peter stepped down off the edge of the cliff and ran towards his dad, crying against him. 

Tony picked Peter up and rocked him side to side. His heart was about to pop out of his chest from how hard it was beating but having Peter safely in his arms was helping him calm down a bit now. 

“Oh, baby. Are you okay?” Tony asked, kneeling down to stand Peter in front of him. He brushed the curls off his face repeatedly, just wanting to take in the fact that Peter was okay. “You really scared me.” 

Peter couldn’t stop himself from crying. “I’m sorry. I-I wanna go to the boat. Please. We-we have to, daddy.” 

Tony wasn’t going to say no this time and risk something like this happening again. He didn’t believe Peter, there was no way there was a boat where Peter said there was and if there actually was, there was no way Peter would have seen it. 

“Okay. Okay, we’ll go first thing in the morning.” 

Peter pushed Tony’s hands away from him. “No! We have to go now. Right now.” 

Tony didn’t have anything on him. He didn’t have Peter’s inhalers or any water. Nothing. He didn’t think of grabbing anything as he ran into the jungle after Peter. He didn’t want to risk Peter running off like this again and hurting himself or worse… so Tony reluctantly agreed. 

“Fine. Where is this boat?” He stood up fully, having no idea where it was. He didn’t think Peter knew either. 

Peter looked around. “Maybe the whispering will tell us. I know it’s this way.” Peter began walking back into the jungle and in the opposite direction of the beach they had all their stuff on. 

Tony was going to give it to sunset and if there was no boat, he was going to take Peter back no matter how much he kicked and screamed. 

After about forty minutes of walking, they came across a stream of water in the jungle so Tony grabbed Peter’s hand to lead him down to it. “Let’s take a five minute break here. You need to catch your breath.” 

Peter jumped down. “I’m fine. I wanna find the boat, daddy. I know there’s a boat and-and we can use it to go home.” 

Tony sat on the rock. “Don’t be upset if we don’t find one, baby. We’ll go home eventually, even if this isn’t the way.” 

Peter frowned. He stood up to push his dad’s legs apart so he could stand between them, feeling safe. “I know there is. Let's keep going.” 

Tony pressed a kiss to Peter’s head and stood up. “Alright. Let’s go find this boat.” 

They walked some more, through the jungle and then out onto a bay of rocks that was sanded down by water after all the years. Tony stopped to look around the crater. 

The ground was really uneven with a lot of sharp edges so he went to grab Peter’s hand but Peter started running towards the crater edge. “Peter, slow down!” 

Peter climbed on top of a rock and looked out onto the water, spotting the boat. “There it is! I see it!” He jumped up and down in his excitement. “Look, daddy! I see the boat!” 

“What?” Tony didn’t believe it. He had to see it with his own two eyes so he climbed onto the rock and there it was, the sail boat was anchored in the water. “Oh my god.” 

He looked down at Peter. How did he know? 

“Did you pass by this place when you were trying to find me after the crash?” That was the only explanation Tony could think of. 

Peter shook his head. “No. Mary told me. She said we have to leave on it.” 

Tony didn’t see Mary but now he was a bit scared. How was that possible? He stepped down off the rock and picked Peter up, setting him on his feet. 

“Aren’t we gonna leave on it? We can go home.” 

“Peter, we don’t even know if it works. We don’t know how it got here or who left it, we don’t even know how long it’s been here for. It’s probably broken.” Tony wasn’t going to risk their life. 

Yeah, the island sucked and he wanted off of it but it was better than taking an unknown boat out to the open sea. 

Peter stomped his foot. “We have to try! We can go home, daddy.” 

Tony kneeled down in front of Peter. “Stop it. We’re not sailing out on that boat. It’s a sailboat, not a ship. It’s not made for open waters like what’s out there.” Tony waved his arm out towards the ocean. 

“No! I wanna leave!” Peter screamed, hitting Tony on the arm. 

Tony let Peter hit him. He knew how frustrated he was. “I know. And we will but that’s not the way.” 

Peter looked away from him. “I wanna try.” 

Tony sighed. He stood up and tried to think about it. He was an engineer. If the boat was broken, he could fix it no problem but he didn’t have any tools or equipment and he didn’t even know how he’d get out to the boat. Plus it would take days if not weeks to find any other ships or land out there. He would have to prepare for weeks out on the open waters. 

He didn’t know if it was worth the risk. 

“Okay. Alright, we’ll try.”