IT NEVER HAPPENED. FIND ONE OF THOSE MEMES NORMAL KIDS LIKE. IT’S THE PERFECT SOCIAL SMOKESCREEN.
We all know that the COOL KIDS are into the MEMES these days. And you are definitely a COOL KID.
...You don’t have any memes saved on your phone.
FUCK.
Thankfully, you have an internet connection. You spend all of ten minutes scrolling for the IDEAL DISTRACTION IMAGE. It must be TASTEFUL. CHARMING. WITTY, even.
Ah, yes.
PERFECT.
It even has a dog on it. It’s not as great as WINSTON, THE BEST GIRL, but it’s a close second.
You pet WINSTON again before sending the picture, because she deserves it.
Good dog. Best friend.
… You decide to insert WINSTON’S dashing visage into the meme. ONLY THE BEST FOR A NORTHWEST.
GRAPHIC DESIGN IS YOUR PASSION.
We kindly won’t mention the half an hour you took to figure out how to make it.
(Oops.)
MP, Tailor
Winston meeting up with waddles be like
H E H
I can’t be outdone
It will not be
WHERE’S THAT PICTURE OF BUSINESS WADDLES WITH THE PHONE?!?!?!
… Business Waddles?
HECC
Watch me find it in like three days
I’ll just send it with no context watch me
He’s wearing a suit isn’t he
What are you a cop
I can probably buy the cops so same difference
Also now that I know waddles has the capacity to be refined
He must be for Winnie
A suitor hahahahahahahahaha
So you admit he’s wearing a suit
PERHAPS
You’ve done it.
You’ve successfully diffused that situation.
A crisis, AVERTED.
COOL KID STATUS, AFFIRMED.
Congratulations. This has been your peak. Nothing else in your life will ever compare to this moment.
It is now 8:10 PRECISELY. You have a little under an hour until the PRACTICE BRUNCH.
With that in mind, do you…
>[GRAB SOMETHING TO EAT BEFORE BRUNCH.]
>[GO SEE YOUR PONIES.]
>[STARE AT THE CEILING, CONTEMPLATING THE FUTILITY OF THIS BARREN MORTAL COIL.]
>[STARE AT YOUR PHONE AND BROWSE YOUR MESSAGES WITH MABEL. (NO, YOU DO NOT HAVE A PROBLEM.)]