Battle in D.C.
Meanwhile, the Guardians of the Galaxy land in Washington DC near an important-looking lab.
QUILL
Now, those thieves are out there somew--
DRAX
But we are thieves. Is it not demeaning to ourselves yet demeaning to them?
QUILL
You get the idea, idiot. Now, we’re just here to find the body.
Up walks the MI crew.
ETHAN
You know, you should’ve landed somewhere less conspicuous if you wanted to avoid us seeing you.
QUILL
Ah, if it isn’t the thieves.
ETHAN
Funny, I was about to say the same thing.
QUILL
But you stole something from us!
ETHAN
It had to be destroyed. Somehow, she’s alive and got back out.
GAMORA
Wait, what?
QUILL
Like Frankenstein?
ETHAN
I dunno.
NEBULA
Why are you so calm about it?
ETHAN
Figured after seeing her attack a bunch of lab techs with lightning coming out of her hands on camera, we didn’t want to be against her.
QUILL
So you’re with her?
ETHAN
Not remotely. We’re waiting for her to come back around here. She’ll come, because we’re a threat to her power. I say we team up and defeat her together.
QUILL
Alright, Guardians, quick huddle.
ROCKET
Let’s do it.
DRAX
Let’s team up.
QUILL
Whatever happened to “huddle?”
GROOT
I am Groot.
ROCKET
*Laughs*
QUILL
Hey! That is NOT nice!
ETHAN
So, there we have it. Sit back and wait for Anna to bring the fight to us.
QUILL
Look, how do we even know she’s coming for us next?
Benji is hit by a car that was thrown from somewhere.
QUILL
Oh. So I guess that’s how we know.
Seemingly out of nowhere, Anna lands between the two factions, striking Ilsa and Drax with lightning. Quill charges Anna, but she literally just kicks him and throws him thirty feet back.
ETHAN
So it’s gonna be that kind of day.
ANNA
I killed the Scarlet Witch. Are you sure you wanna fight me?
ETHAN
Any day, any time.
Ethan reaches for a pistol, but Anna uses the Force to pick him up and throw him against a building. On her other side, Gamora and Nebula throw knives, which Anna catches BY THE BLADES and throws them back, hitting Gamora’s left forearm and Nebula’s right shoulder. Anna then picks them up with the Force and throws them against a building, like she did to Ethan.
ANNA
Anyone else wanna go?
From behind, Mantis puts her hands on Anna’s head.
MANTIS
Sleep.
As Anna’s eyes flutter, Quill shoots laser blasts at her. Anna reaches out her hand to use the Force to redirect Quill’s lasers at Luther. Luther is knocked unconscious, but isn’t killed.
QUILL
Mantis, you got her?
MANTIS
Not for much longer!
ROCKET
This oughta do the trick.
Rocket pulls the pin on a grenade and throws it at Anna as Mantis backs away. It explodes once it hits Anna, sending fire high into the sky. Smoke lingers, so no one can see if Anna’s still alive.
QUILL
Did it work?
Suddenly, Groot’s arms start growing and they wrap around Quill, Rocket, and Mantis like a really long boa constrictor.
ROCKET
Groot, what are you doing?!
GROOT
I am Groot!
QUILL
Well, then find a way to control it, I don’t care if you can’t!
Anna walks out of the smoke unscathed, her hand palm-up in front of her.
ANNA
You’re no match for my knowledge of the dark side. Ever hear of Palpatine? I killed him. It was a fight, to be fair, and he put his knowledge and ideas into me. I was so blind. This is the way. The way to dominance. The way to the dark side. The way of the Sith.
Anna moves the fingers on her right hand around, and the streets open up and swallow the GOTG and the MI team then close up like nothing ever happened.
ANNA
If only there were ever ground Forces that you saw, Palpatine. If only.
Anna gets in the Guardians’ ship and flies up and away to who-knows-where.
Within minutes, Dr Strange and Wong arrive at the scene. All they see is a turned-over car and some indents against some buildings.
DR STRANGE
Okay, something weird happened here.
WONG
You can say that again.
DR STRANGE
My best guess is the Hulk threw this car against the sides of these buildings, but the indent looks more like a person.
WONG
Yes. This is…
DR STRANGE
Don’t say it.
WONG
This is very…
DR STRANGE
DON’T say it.
WONG
…
This is very strange
DR STRANGE
You said it.
WONG
It is hilarious that your name is both a name and an adjective. It invites jokes.
DR STRANGE
Well, I’m glad you can find humor in it. Let’s go back to the Sanctum, but keep a watch on this place. And let’s contact Thor.
WONG
But it looks like a bad car accident.
DR STRANGE
Something feels off. Something. I’ll contact Thor.
In the Avengers facility, Thor and Elsa are watching reruns of “Wheel of Fortune.”
ELSA
Do you have anything else DVR’d?
THOR
Well, there’s “Jeopardy!”, and there’s “The Price is Right”...
ELSA
“Wheel” is fine.
The phone rings, and Thor picks it up.
DR STRANGE
Thor?
THOR
Dr Strange? How’d you know I was here?
DR STRANGE
Mystic Arts. Listen, we need to keep an eye out for a new enemy. Whoever it is, they beat the Guardians of the Galaxy and the IMF.
THOR
Well, Elsa and I are on standby.
DR STRANGE
Good. Keep the line open.
THOR
We’re literally just watching “Wheel of Fortune”. Call when you need us.
ELSA
Thor? Get off the phone! They’re about to solve the puzzle!
THOR
I gotta go. The man with the million-dollar-wedge is about to solve.
DR STRANGE
Millennials. Just be ready.
THOR
OK, boomer.