
There’s only room for seventeen in this town!
Each candidate was in an identical room down to the weapon this week. Though, they were no longer in an endless cube of concrete. Each room was chillingly pristine. White walls and lab benches oozed of a sterile perfection that only served to set the candidates on end.
“Oh, you’re fuckin’ evil for this,” The Fool commented with a laugh.
“Yeah, but they’re waking up. We gonna start?”
“Yesssirrrrr.”
—
Clyde opened his eyes, immediately dropping his hands over his face. “Fucking hell,” he muttered. It seemed that the harsh white LED lights that reflected off the stainless steel countertops and spotless white tiles did not sparkle with him.
—
Craig, Christophe, and Rebecca were all in separate rooms, having the exact same reaction.
Glass cabinets stretch along the walls, displaying rows of meticulously arranged scalpels, bone saws, and dissecting tools. On the wall, heavy metal tongs and forceps hung beside sharpened glass shards. Small utility knives were perfectly aligned on a magnetic strip, blades gleaming under the uncomfortable glow. There was a small fire extinguisher hung in the far right corner.
The three people that exclusively went for hunting knives had their choice taken from them. Silently, all three processed, each wearing looks of near-hopeless concern.
—
“What the fuck is going on?!” Leslie shouted, demanding attention.
“Sorry for the delayed response,” The Fool cut in.
“Where am I?! Let me out!”
“Is that how people normally react?”
“Uncertain… Shut up.”
“HELLO?!”
“Hi!” The Fool and The Prophet both let out quiet snickers at this.
“WHERE THE FUCK AM I?!”
“Oh, right! So, y’see. You’re on the second half of the show.”
“What??”
“Long story short, this is a two part series posing as two separate entities. Usually, we try not to explicitly talk about it, but you’re incredibly late to the game and we’ll be honest, things are notlooking good for you. So keep up, alright?”
Leslie swallowed hard, nodding.
“Once we run through announcements, you will be lifted up into an arena. Everyone stays in the arena until one person dies. If a week passes, or there’s outright protests, we step in.”
“What?” she whispered.
“It’s a multi-part fight to the death. The prize is a shitton of cash.”
“No, it’s the big reveal.”
“Literally, no one cares about the big reveal.”
“Fine, you fuckin’ explain then!”
“I will!” The Prophet cleared their throat. “As I was saying. If you make it out, you get a shitton of cash.”
“What if I want to leave?”
“Yeah, no. Sorry. You got picked, unfortunately, you can’t really get unpicked.”
“But–”
“You agreed to be on the show, did you not?”
“But not this!”
“There’s a lesson here about reading the fine print,” The Prophet responded sagely.
“There's a Sou–”
“You literally can’t say that here!”
“You’re actually no fun.”
“Yeah, we know,” The Prophet responded with a dramatic huff. “As I was saying. You’re in. Only way out is kill ‘em all or get killed. I personally think you have the advantage here. You don’t actually know any of these people. You knew them for five minutes when you were a kid. There’s no attachment here. They’re all trying not to fall apart as they get through this because there is soooomuch attachment.” The Prophet laughed. "But, y’know. There’s no attachment there for you. Hence why we’re catching you up.”
“So they’re all coming after me?”
“Not all of ‘em.”
“Just most of them!”
“Fuck,” she breathed out.
“I mean, I personally think if you make it through this round, you got it.”
She nodded slightly. “Okay.”
“Any questions?”
“How do we–?”
“Usually, there will be a wall in the room lined with weapons. This week, you have the entire room though. I’ll get into that in a sec.”
“Okay.”
“Great. Good luck!”
—
Several shelves sat on the walls, holding unlabelled glass bottles, obviously filled with acids and other volatile chemicals. Pressurized gas canisters and chemical sprayers were on the wall to each candidate’s left.
Dovakein eyes the whole room with purpose, taking in every detail. This was not the chaos they were used to. It was cold, calculated—more brutality then the group was used to, wearing a mask of order.
—
“Goodmorr—Are you really not gonna talk?”
There was silence throughout the room.
Kyle took his chance. “YO, BEFORE YOU START!”
“They’re bickering. Talk to me.”
“This is obviously different.”
“The Prophet will explain shortly.”
“I figured. Are the lab benches fireproof?”
“These rooms are designed so you literally can’t die unless you purposefully end it. Or if it’s duos or more, y’know.”
“Thank you.”
“Also, while you’re here… I don’t know why the others haven’t asked, but I want to know. What’s going on with you, Tweek, and Marjorine?”
“I’m sorry?”
“You threw that star last week. And then you managed to disappear from Q4 entirely before we could clear the arena.”
Kyle stayed silent.
“Okay, fine. I’m not pushing it… Are you guys done!?”
“Yes, we’re done,” The Fool responded happily.
The producers took longer to introduce themselves today, probably for Leslie’s sake, but Kyle was unbothered. He started pulling unlabeled chemicals from the shelves, lining up the large bottles onto the closest lab bench before running over to the sink. He turned it on, eyeing it for a moment before sticking his hand under, cupping up some water and running back over.
Using his other hand, he made a bunch of small puddles across the surface. He wound up with ten before he shook his hand out. Kyle threw all caution to the wind as he opened the first bottle, not bothering to look for gloves or anything else. He poured out the tiniest bit onto the water, immediately holding his hand over the concoction.
—
Stan was carefully eyeing the room, uncertain as the producers continued to talk. He was barely paying attention until he heard one of them cut the group off, sounding completely thrown. “Wait, do you see what boy genius is doing??”
“Who, Ike??”
“Look at two!”
“Oh, Broflovski, you fuckin’ lunatic,” The Prophet said with pure amusement.
Stan’s brows furrowed as the room lapsed into complete silence.
“I would like to strike my last statement from the record. Neither of the Broflovski’s are up to anything nefarious. Moving on.”
“Wait, is Kyle okay??”
“Stan, shut up. AS WE WERE SAYING!”
—
“THE FUN PART!!”
“Can you guys tell he’s been waiting for this?”
Marjorine let out a quiet laugh.
“SHUT UP!! Okay! So, as you can see, you are in a room much different than what you are used to. To keep it short and sweet, each of you have the exact same room, down to the two, seven, nine, and thirteen inch shards of glass. Yes. I measured.” Marjorine could hear the quiet laughter from The Charlatan and The Fool, but The Prophet ignored them.
—
“But the really fun part. These rooms are allyours. There is no weapon limit. If you can carry it, you got it. Go fucking crazy.”
A centrifuge was in one of the corners. Wendy slowly stepped over, wiping at her face with her arm. Upon further inspection, the rotor was missing—replaced with a heavy metal bar sharpened to a point. She blinked slowly, nodding slightly.
—
“And your time starts now! Only ‘cause I genuinely wanna see what you guys can come up with in five minutes.”
Kenny had started shoving the utility knives in his pockets without hesitation at the go ahead.
—
Trent was predictable. He couldn’t go for his usual hunting knife or bat, but he went for something obvious and vaguely intimidating. A bone saw. It was anyone’s guess as to what would happen if he actually had to fight someone, but Trent had made it this far without any legitimate confrontations.
—
Ike, Tweek, and Clyde had wound up in similar positions to Kenny. All of the small weapons they could get their hands on were being shoved into their pockets. Though Tweek stepped away after a moment. A flicker of fire passed through the blonde’s eyes before they went back to their usual muted sage.
He started pulling open drawers, looking for something.
—
Kevin had settled on the thirteen inch shard of glass and a mystery bottle.
“Do you want to even try to figure out what’s in it?”
Kevin shrugged. “Up to god.”
“You’re funny. Alright.”
—
Damien sat on the floor, taking the opportunity to get the rest of it out of his system. He looked up with teary eyes to see the timer at less than a minute. He wiped at his face, trying to pull himself together.
“Water bottles are in the cabinet behind you.”
He nodded, forcing himself up.
—
Wendy had her foot on the side of the centrifuge, and with one final tug, she had managed to free the metal bar that was more akin to a spear.
—
Tammy sat on the lab bench, feet swaying slightly as she held onto the personal sized fire extinguisher. That was literally all she took.
—
Bebe quickly grabbed the nine inch glass shard from the wall as the floor started to rise, having managed to waste her whole time overwhelmed and staring. The lighting was less harsh where she’d popped up in, thankfully.
“Babe!”
Bebe’s head whipped to her left, eyes landing on Marjorine who was across the auditorium. Bebe darted down the aisle without hesitation. Marjorine ran towards her, meeting her halfway, pulling her into a tight hug. It was like for a moment, the two had completely forgotten where they were, they were just so happy to see each other. Bebe pulled back slightly, pressing a kiss on the top of her girlfriend’s head. “I literally have missed you so much the past two weeks.”
“Me too.” Marjorine looked up at her, smiling softly. “Gameplan. We let these chucklefucks take care of it and find a good place to hide.”
“Which chucklefucks?? I thought you had to talk to Tweek!”
“Have it on good authority that both Tweek and Kyle are good. And we have Kevin. Also, everyone’s gunning for Leslie this week as far as I know. We don’t have to stress for once. Let’s take advantage of it, okay?”
Bebe pulled her back into a tight hug. “Okay.”
—
“BOO!”
“Honestly, Marj deserves a break.”
“I know, but I’m still booing.”
The Fool and The Charlatan just nodded, ready to accept this week’s loss.
—
Craig had popped up in a softly lit room with deep navy walls. He took one look around, face falling. He swallowed hard, walking past the computer stations and models, straight up to the display case in the back of the room. Meteorite samples and other rocks were secured inside, meticulously labeled. The panels were backlit, showcasing little metallic and crystalline structures.
Craig took another look around, noticing three doors in the room. One to the left, one to the right, and one to the front. But instead of exploring further, he just took a seat, dropping his head in his hands.
—
“Think he’s gonna cry?”
“Over this? Absolutely.”
“Crazy part is it was totally random.”
“No shit!”The Charlatan responded with disbelief.
“Swear! Shut up though. I wanna see what Leslie’s doing.”
—
Leslie looked around, carefully eyeing the fume hood in the corner. There wasn’t much to the chemistry lab she found herself in. Glassware lined a shelf on the back wall. There was a closet that she probably could’ve looked into, but she clearly didn’t see a need. There was a door ahead of her and a door to her left.
She kept as quiet as she could as she stepped towards the door on the left side of the room. There was a small window, showcasing a dark lab. She couldn’t make out much of anything or anyone from what she could see.
She turned back around, going to scope out the door in the front of the room. An identical lab was waiting for her and after a few moments, she opened the door.
—
“Wow, he is so fucking lucky.”
“True.”
—
Damien had started in the medical lab. Another random choice that had seemed to gut a contestant. His attempts to pull himself together were immediately rendered useless as tears started to pour out again.
He let out a shaky exhale as he started to go through drawers without caution. He pulled out a scalpel, arming himself for the first time in god knows how long. It was unexpected. But what was more unexpected was him slicing his palm and holding it out, droplets of blood falling onto the linoleum.
—
Kevin didn’t even bother to move as he entered the arena. He leaned back on his hands, deciding to stay put.
—
Tammy had popped up in a biotech lab. She glanced around, carefully eyeing the various fume hoods, incubators, centrifuges, and microscopes before something caught her eye. On the wall towards the front door past the small row of freezers, there was a picture hanging in a frame. Her eyes widened, looking it with some sort of devastated horror.
It was a simple photo of two kids dressed as scientists, posing together with lab coats and flasks, smiling brightly. They had to be around nine years old. She would’ve recognized them even if she hadn’t been around them for a good chunk of her life. She practically flew across the room, yanking the frame off the wall entirely, smacking the photo of Wendy and Brimmy onto the ground.
The frame shattered against the tile. Her jaw clenched and she swallowed hard, pulling out the photo and quickly peering around the room. She started to flurry around, obviously looking for an empty spot to hide it.
—
“Wow,” The Prophet said flatly. “Was not expecting that to be the finder nor the reaction.”
—
“You people fucking SUCK!” Tammy shouted before falling back into silence, taking a seat under one of the tables close to the frame, seemingly deciding not to go looking for Trent this week.
—
Kyle rolled his neck with a quiet pop as he quickly took in his surroundings. He was in a simple biology lab. There was a door ahead, one on his left, one on his right. He let out a quiet sigh, slightly adjusting the strap of the chemical sprayer sitting on his shoulder as he walked towards the door in front of him.
—
Rebecca was quick to whip her head around noticing her three options of doors. They each had small windows. The one ahead led to a hallway of some sort, the other two led to neighboring labs. She looked to her left, spotting a glimpse of copper. She squinted, stepping back slightly when she realized she was staring at the side of Kyle’s head. She looked him over once more before silently taking off towards the door to her right.
Christophe jumped as she practically flew into the next room, silently closing the door behind her. Her eyes landed on him and she jumped with a quiet curse.
“Just me. You’re fine.”
“Corner. Now,” she whispered.
“Hm?”
“Broflovski has a chemical sprayer. No idea what's in it. We’re hiding.”
He nodded, quickly following her towards the back corner of the room where they couldn’t be seen from Kyle’s direction.
—
Tweek found himself in a genetics lab. He quickly scanned the room, catching sight of the blonde that had popped up to his right. He didn’t hesitate to go towards the neighboring door, quietly opening it.
Kenny whipped in his direction, holding up a shard of glass. “Fuck,” he breathed out. “Hi, Tweek.”
“Hey,” Tweek responded with a weak smile. “Sorry.”
“You’re good.”
—
Wendy was in some sort of UV lab. There were different lamps and set ups, the back wall lined with different PPE. Wendy kept her weapon pointed downwards, carefully gripped in her right hand. She took a deep breath, letting out a shuddered exhale. “Control yourself,” she whispered. She swallowed hard, wiping at her face before more tears could fall. She let out another quick exhale before walking towards the door in the front of the room, her only option.
The door led her to a hallway. It was blank hellscape of beige and brick red linoleum, the overhead lights unnecessarily bright. She made a right, eyes shifting around as she walked with a purpose. The next lab she came across, she immediately looked in the window to see Stan, clearly on the fence about moving. She opened the door, causing him to jump.
“We’re good this week,” she said briskly. “Come with me.”
He swallowed hard. “Think I’m gonna hide out.”
She nodded. “Suit yourself. Stay safe, Stanley.”
“You too.”
They exchanged a look. “Scream if you see her. I’ll come if I hear you.”
He nodded.
She offered him a weak smile before stepping back out into the hallway.
—
Clyde was surrounded by rocks, obviously in a geology lab. He pulled a utility knife from his pocket, taking a deep breath. He looked at the three options presented to him. Two labs, one hallway. He took another deep breath before stepping out into the hallway. He looked to his left and right, seeing the place completely empty.
There was a door directly across from him with a sign on it.
DO NOT ENTER
-Management
But apparently Clyde doesn’t know how to read because he walked up to it without hesitation, letting himself inside.
—
“ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!” The Prophet shouted as they stood up, wheely chair flying back across the room.
“What is that??”
Their hands came up, wrapping around the antlers of their mask. “Fucking void!”
“Why… did you create a void?” The Charlatan asked slowly over The Fool’s laughter.
“I GOT LAZY! DESIGNING THAT MANY LABS AND A NEW SYSTEM IS A LOT OF WORK!”
“Didn’t you do fine with the mall?”
“Yeah, but we get to keepthe mall. It has a purpose! What the fuck are we doing with 25 labs and some storage rooms?!”
“Experimenting??”
“Oh my GOD!”
The Fool let out a wheeze. “Go fish him out before he dies! Please! If I go I’m gonna laugh at him!”
“Seriously??”
The Fool waved a hand. “I personally think he’s really fucking funny and I knowhe’s gonna make that dumbass face and I’m gonna lose it and get caught in there.”
“What if we just left him there?”
“He’d be out for the rest of the game and then we’d have to fish him out.”
“Is being lazy considered favoritism??”
The Fool shrugged. “No, probably not.”
“I mean, I’m not complaining.”
“He’s staying in the void until we have to pull them out then.”
“Kay!”
—
Leslie continued to move quietly through the labs in order, not deviating from her path.
—
Kyle made it to the top of the stairs, quickly checking both directions. His nose scrunched slightly as he looked both ways again, trying to figure out where to go. He let out a huff, probably realizing that wasting time deciding was still wasting time. He went right, immediately looking in the window of the first room. He didn’t see anything but rows of freezers, so he kept walking.
A moment later, the door behind him opened, causing him to whip around. He visibly relaxed the second his eyes landed on Stan. He ran towards him, pushing him back into the chilly room.
“Jesus, Ky–!”
Kyle clamped a hand over his mouth, shooting him a look. “Don’t yell. I don’t know who’s up here. Where were you hiding?”
Stan pointed towards the very back corner, behind the last freezer.
Kyle retracted his hand slightly, tapping Stan’s cheek twice with the back of his index finger. “Okay. I need to talk to you."
Stan nodded. “Okay, yeah.”
Kyle offered him a gentle smile before pulling him into a tight hug. “But also before I say anything I was really fucking worried and I really fucking missed you.”
Stan hesitantly wrapped his arms around Kyle. “I missed you too.”
—
“This is gettin’ gay.”
“Agreed, but I think Kyle’s about to drop a big reveal.”
“You’re gonna let him do that??”
“I mean, Cartman already had it but then he up and died right away. And I’m certain Tweek knows. At least to some degree. But I don’t see him saying anything.”
“I don’t think we should pan back to them.”
“Seriously??”
“I think what you think Kyle’s gonna say would be so much funnier if it just got thrown at everyone at the same time.”
The Fool looked at The Prophet, tilting their head slightly. “Are you conceding??”
“No! But just imagine. You know exactly what I’m thinking of.”
“So you concede.”
“No. But I will be realistic and acknowledge that the longer this drags out, the lower the chances of me winning is.”
“My money’s still on Stan.”
The Prophet turned their head slowly, just staring at The Charlatan for a moment.
The Fool laughed, shoulders shaking slightly. “Fuck it. Okay, yeah. It’s too early in the game for a big reveal anyways.”
“Okay, who are we looking at then?”
“Uhhhh. Spin the wheel.”
—
Leslie had stepped past the freezers and into the biotech lab, deciding to go down the row the way she did on the other side of the building. She carefully looked around before stepping into the next lab.
She took a peek around, eyebrows furrowing when she saw the broken glass on the floor in the front of the room. She stepped closer, slowly—carefully. She stopped completely when a quiet crunch rang out. She shook her head, taking another quick look around before quickly shuffling towards the next lab, oblivious to Tammy who was still in her hiding spot, silently watching with wide eyes as she fiddled with the amber pendant around her neck.
—
“Um… Should we check on Damien?”
“I mean, I think it’s fine, but sure.”
“Hell yeah, I’m nosy.”
—
Damien was on his knees, staring at a large circle that came from his own blood on the linoleum. Intricate symbols were messy scrawled along the edges. A curved ‘V’ that almost represented the symbol for aries sat in the middle.
“I know it can’t be easy to lose someone, but do we have to medicate you?”
The man was visibly shaking, he looked up, irises flaring with bright red intensity. “Why the fuck isn’t it working?” he asked, voice wavering.
“Why isn’t what working?”
“YOU KNOW WHAT!” he screamed as he pelted the scalpel against the floor. “WHY THE FUCK ISN’T IT WORKING?!”
“You shouldn’t scream. The games haven’t ended yet and not everyone’s on board with taking out Leslie. It’d be a tragedy if Wendy got left alone because of your own carelessness.”
Damien’s hands flew up into his hair as his eyes widened, smearing blood across his right temple. He grit his teeth, shaking his head slightly as he dropped his gaze back down to the floor. “Fuck,” got out with a hint of a shudder. “What the fuck are you people?”
“I mean, you already knew we outrank you here.”
“But–” He let out a shaky exhale. “But—That doesn’t make any sense. You shouldn’t be able to just–” He shook his head, tears slipping down his cheeks as he lowered himself to the ground. “Fuck.”
—
It was nearly thirty minutes into the game when Trent decided to move, giving up on waiting for Tammy to magically show up. He slowly opened the door to the storage closet he’d found himself in, looking around the hallway. No one was in sight.
To his left, he could see labs starting where the hallway turned. To his right, there were more labs at the end, but directly was another door without the small window. He let out a slow exhale as he stepped into the halfway, deciding to start for the door.
He pushed it open as quietly as he could, but Ike spun around on the chair he was in, arm coming up, utility knife ready.
Trent put his hands up, but didn’t hesitate to slip inside and close the door. “We’re good,” he said slowly.
Ike dropped his hand immediately. “Stan told me we’re okay with you right now.”
Trent nodded. “That and they’re all gunnin’ for her.”
“You’re not?” Ike asked curiously.
“No. But I’m also not gonna stop ‘em for going after someone I don’t know versus someone I do.”
Ike nodded.
Trent took a moment, looking at him carefully before his brows furrowed. “I know that no one’s okay. And we’re here. But you…” He tilted his head side to side slightly. “Are you alright?”
Ike shrugged. “My brother’s keeping something huge from me. I dunno if he’s gonna tell me though. But I’m just pissed I guess. Y’know. We shouldn’t be hiding stuff from each other here.”
“I get that,” Trent said quietly.
Ike just shrugged again. “Way she goes,” he responded with a sigh. “Wanna watch with me?”
“Seriously?”
“They put me in the security room and I am not giving up my spot.”
Trent stepped closer, looking at the monitors that were now behind Ike. Each room seemed to have a small square somewhere amongst the four screens. “Holy shit,” he muttered. “You know where Tammy is?”
“I haven’t seen her or Clyde since I sat down,” he admitted.
“But we’re still playing.”
“Honestly, I’m considering it a good thing.”
Trent nodded, coming next to Ike to look at the monitors. “Alright. Let’s see how this goes, I guess.”
—
“You gave them afull access room??”
“I was feeling silly! Wehave a full access room!” The Prophet shot back defensively.
The Charlatan let out an involuntary laugh at this.
—
Dovakien walks in behind Trent and Ike without a word. They both whipped around for a moment before shrugging. “Just close it,” Trent ordered.
Dovakien nods, shutting the door behind them to watch the end of the game play out.
—
Tweek eyed Kenny carefully as they continued to sit against two cabinets in the physics lab where Tweek had found him. “Weird question. Did you ever…” He let out a quiet hum. "Come back from Damien’s house… with a different eye color?”
Kenny furrowed his brows at his partner. “What?”
—
Craig was still head in hands, shoulders quietly shaking as he stayed next to the meteorite case. Instead of fighting, he chose to mourn the life he should’ve been living. We’re under the assumption that most of his fellow competitors would’ve seen this display of pure anguish and taken pity on the man even if they weren’t allied with him, but the person who walked in was not most of his fellow competitors.
He looked up with wide eyes, immediately flinching backwards when his gaze landed on Leslie. He shook his head slightly. “No.”
She silently closed the door behind her, walking towards him.
The poor guy seemed to be completely frozen. “I-” He shook his head. “I’m not playing.”
“That really sucks,” she said quietly. “I still have to.”
—
“Like, have you ever come home different?”
Kenny furrowed his brows, looking at Tweek with vague suspicion. “Not that different.”
“Oh. Alright.”
“Why?”
“Just wondering.”
“You’re hiding something.”
—
Wendy was on a warpath as she walked through the hallways. She’d ran into several people, but she was laser focused on one target. It had been too long and the devastated woman on the verge was clearly getting antsy.
But it seemed someone was on her side, at least in this capacity.
She spotted long black hair from the front door to the astronomy lab and didn’t hesitate.
—
Tweek’s right eye closed involuntarily. “Nope. Just been doing a lot of thinking. Trying to figure something out, I guess.”
“Tweek.”
“Yeah?”
“Your tics are back.”
Tweek’s nose scrunched slightly. “It’s from having to fake ‘em every week, I think.”
Kenny narrowed his eyes. “Your tics are back, they moved you and Craig, you keep having secret conversations with Marjorine, and you’re asking me about Damien’s house.”
“Okay, first of all, I’m not having secre–”
The loud buzzer rang out, cutting off Tweek’s sentence. The ninth game had officially come to an end.
—
Wendy slipped inside as though she were a ghost, not making a single sound. Leslie was silently watching Craig quietly beg for her to back off. “I don’t want to hurt anyone. So please,” he tried.
Leslie sighed. “Can you stop?”
Wendy’s face contorted slightly before she let it go completely, stepping towards the woman who had not noticed the presence of a third person. She didn’t hesitate. The second she was within range, she brought her arms toward her before slamming them downwards slightly, sending her spear through Leslie.
She folded on herself instantly with a strangled noise. Craig stared up at Wendy with genuine horror. “What did you-”
Wendy looked at him coldly as she put a boot against Leslie’s shoulder, kicking her off before she dropped the spear to her right. “Get your shit together, Tucker.”