“I may not remember my own name but, your cute friend over there can call me whatever he’d like.” Bucky winked, directing it to the left of Sam and… Oh, fuck! Did Bucky just flirt with Zemo? If Sam didn’t believe Bucky had hit his head hard, he did now. Sam just wanted a nap. A nice, soft cashmere, some velvet throw pillows and a nice couch to sink into and forget the day but apparently, that was too much to ask for and Bucky just HAD to hit his head and end up in the nearest hospital.
Zemo only smirked in response.
“I mean seriously doll; you could just call me by your name.” Bucky continues, sending another suggestive wink at the man, Zemo’s signature smugness grows with each word. He’s gonna hold this over Bucky for years to come. Sam just sighed.
“Please don’t flirt with the terrorist Bucky.” Sam pleads. Bucky’s eyes flick down and up Zemo’s body as if a bomb may be hiding under the fur-lined coat. “And Baron, please don’t encourage him.” Bucky’s eyes light up then. Zemo stays silent for the time being, plotting no doubt.
“Hot, dangerous and royalty? Jackpot.” Bucky exclaims, not taking his eyes off Zemo to register Sam’s ‘I’m done with your shit’ face. A couch looked real good about now. Zemo chuckles then.
“I like you a lot more this way, James. You surprisingly have some taste.” Zemo practically purrs, as he’s as much of a bastard as Bucky is when it comes to pissing off Sam Wilson.
Sam was about to continue when Bucky practically rushes to sit up on the hospital bed. Sam stepped forward, arms up to steady his friend but Bucky waves him off.
“Doll, you better not be messing with me, head injury or not I’m feeling a strong urge to make out with you right now.” Zemo’s smirk grows as does Sam’s impatience.
Sam rushes to place his hand over Bucky’s mouth before he can say anything else incriminating about his apparent lust for the Sokovian bastard. He and Bucky were so gonna talk about this when he got his memory back. The doctors had assured him it was temporary and if it wasn’t Sam would have to stop the two from getting eloped at this point with the way Zemo was staring hungrily. Zemo’s tongue darted out over his lips slicking them saliva, purposefully teasing. Well, he was a bastard. Sam didn’t expect anything less.
“Unfortunately, Samuel won’t let us have that kind of fun darling but, if the offer still stands after I’d like to do a lot more than make out.” Zemo states unabashedly.
Bucky nods enthusiastically, not at all deterred by Sam’s hand pushing against his mouth. Sam sighs again at the realization that if Bucky wasn’t monitored till he regained his memories, he was practically going to kidnap the Baron as a fuck buddy. And Sam didn’t think the Baron would mind all too much. Might even convince Bucky to take down the rest of the Flag Smashers with lethal force.
Sam glances back at Bucky, observing the disgusting heart eyes he was intently throwing in the Baron’s direction.
Why couldn’t his friend just pine after a nice barista or a cute male stripper like a normal person? Why the smug bastard of a terrorist that he’d broken out of prison?
Zemo laughs then and Sam looks over, but the man’s eyes are trained on Bucky.
His friend is blinking weirdly? Zemo is too? OH! Oh, fuck no!
Fucking stupid horny assholes and their fluency in morse code.
Sam sighs, knowing this is gonna be a long night. The couch was going to have to wait for these bastards.