Their first kiss was intense. It happened out of anger. Like always, Ao'nung was being an asshole, and Neteyam was torn between punching him and kissing him. He chooses the latter. Neteyam went straight to Ao'nung, pushed him against the tree, and wiped that stupid smirk off his lips with a rough kiss.
"They can't know." Ao'nung whispered as they lay together under the night sky. His right arm curled around Neteyam's shoulder as the latter used it as a pillow. Neteyam snuggled closer to him, two fingers playing on Ao'nung's chest, dancing around the light hickey he left right above where his heart was placed.
The forest Na'vi scoffed, "Don't worry; this is embarrassing to me too." The other man just chuckled and pulled him closer.
Their one-night stand became a frequent thing until it became like a normal thing. The guilt after they fucked was real, and Eywa probably was ashamed of them for doing something only friends should do, but they couldn't stop. One look from each other sparks the fire at the pit of their stomachs. Their hands itched to touch each other's bodies; the need to claim each other was so intense they had to do something about it, and so venturing inside the island forest became a nightly routine.
Even if they don't plan on it, they always find each other inside the forest, near the lake where Neteyam kissed Ao'nung for the first time. It became their secret hideout. The place where none of them was was full of peering eyes. Away from expectations, responsibilities, and duties. In that place, they weren't the sons of Toruk Makto and the future Olo'eyktan. In that place, they were just Ao'nung and Neteyam.
And so they fell in love.
It was a rocky relationship. What do you expect? A mighty warrior who is selfless Who is willing to bait himself to protect his people and exchange bullets with sky people as if he has nine lives, and a prideful reef prince who is stubborn and reckless that reminds Neteyam of his brother, who thinks he can get away with everything with that unfiltered mouth of his.
But it works. For some reason, Ao'nung and Neteyam made it work. The war just ended, and the aftermath is still lingering around the village. Families who have lost someone during the war are still in mourning. The people are still grieving for their soul sisters and brothers who were hunted by the sky people. In the early months of their relationship, the village is still recovering from the loss, and the last thing they need is news of them fooling around.
And for this, they agreed to hide their relationship from everyone. Even to their siblings.
It also didn't change the fact that both boys came from different clans. Although Eywa is everything but discriminating, the people are different. Ever since the family came to the village for uturu, they had been labeled as having demon blood. Some people, including Ronal, still blame them for the disaster that came after them, but in Neteyam's understanding, that war is just waiting to happen, as the sky people have been hunting their soul siblings for years. It just happened earlier than expected because of that motherfucker Quaritch.
There are many reasons why their relationship is forbidden. Aside from obvious reasons, both boys are afraid to disappoint their families. Especially their fathers. It is something that both of them have in common, which is why they're in this relationship in the first place. Both boys understand each other so well that sometimes just one look from one another is enough to understand what's on their mind.
But lately, Neteyam has been wanting to tell everyone about them. It's getting harder and harder with each passing day to keep their love hidden. Neteyam wanted to hold his lover in public too. Kiss him goodbye when he's off to hunt and hug him when he returns. Like Lo'ak and Tsireya, who had been open about their relationship to everyone. Even Kiri and Rotxo are slowly making their way toward introducing their blossoming affection to each other. So why can't they do that too?
They've been in a relationship for half a year, and still none of the people knew. Even their siblings don't even know about it. Ao'nung had been very persistent in keeping a secret. Neteyam didn't.
"No! You can't tell them!" Ao'nung argued. He stood up from lying down on Neteyam's lap, brows furrowing deeply.
Neteyam mirrored his frustration and scowled back to his lover, "Why not? The people are slowly recovering from the war; everything is going back to normal! Even your mother is slowly warming up to us! Why are we still hiding?"
Ao'nung didn't answer. He just looked at him with frustration, probably irritated by Neteyam's constant bugging of others, even just their siblings first.
"Are you... ashamed of me?" Neteyam asked, her voice broken from the possibility of the answer.
His irritation melted when he saw the sadness in his boyfriend's eyes. "No. No no no. Of course not," he immediately said, walking towards him. "I will never be ashamed of you, Ma'Teyam."
"Then why? Why are you so persistent in hiding us? Hiding me?"
Ao'nung's heart broke when he heard how small Neteyam's voice was. He hated it when his strong Na'vi whispered like this. He knew Neteyam's tendency to overthink, hurting himself in the process.
Ao'nung lifted his hands and put them on Neteyam's face, lifting them so they could look into each other's eyes. He wanted to punch himself when he saw the golden orbs, which he loves so much and were full of tears. He sighs.
"I'm going to tell them. Just be patient with me, okay?" he says softly. Neteyam nodded, a tear falling from his eyes. Ao'nung gave him a firm, passionate kiss on his lips before kissing his forehead.
"I love you so much, Ma'Teyam." Ao'nung whispers, touching their foreheads together.
Neteyam didn't answer, at least not verbally. He hugged Ao'nung tightly that night. Feeling that comforting warmth, but that didn't calm the lingering bitter feeling at the back of his head.
He's never going to tell everyone.
******
Weeks had passed, and Ao'nung hadn't told anyone. Not even to his sister. Neteyam was frustrated but didn't say anything. He didn't want to pressure his boyfriend. He still hadn't recovered from their fight weeks ago, and he didn't want them to fight again. He decided to keep this relationship at Ao'nung's pace.
Ao'nung had been making up with him after that fight, Neteyam must admit. Before, they were just hooking their pinkies in secret just to have some kind of physical contact with each other; now he would casually throw himself around him. In public. Putting his shoulder around him, flirting with him (which earned a disgusted face from Loak), and sometimes hugging him from the back even when their friends are around Although his antics look casual and teasing, he has never done this before, afraid of what others would say. They were afraid they would get caught by their parents.
It's the bare minimum, but still, it makes Neteyam happy. It made him content and assured. He had forgotten their fight and enjoyed what they had at the moment. It's not like this is going to last forever. They have to tell everyone eventually if they wish to mate with each other.
Until it does
Ao'nung's coming of age is just around the corner. Because of this, the boat Na'vi had been training on under his father was busier than before. Neteyam understands this, as he was once a child of an Olo'eyktan and is a future one himself. He understood the weight of its responsibilities and how important this was for others. Neteyam supported him every step of the way, and Ao'nung couldn't ask for a better partner.
Even though he is busy, Ao'nung would make sure he would make time for his lover, even just for an hour or two, and then after dinner, they would go to their hiding spot in the forest to catch up on each other and, of course, to make love with each other.
Tonight was like one of their usual nights. But a little different since the Tsahik and Olo'eyktan invited the Sully family for dinner. Before it was an awkward situation, a strategy by two leaders to make their wives familiar with each other worked, and after three dinners and endless hissing and glaring, the two fierce ladies eventually warmed up to each other and are now considered friends. Now, Neytiri sat close to Ronal, playing with the Metkayina's youngest addition on her lap. Bouncing the giggling child who's playing with her beaded hair.
"Oh, I remember when Tuk was this little; she wouldn't stop following me around. I'd wail if she didn't see me just for a few seconds." Neytiri cooed, remembering the days when Tuktirey was just a baby.
She missed the moments when her kids were all just babies. But she misses Tuk the most. It wasn't favoritism or anything else. Neteyam is her pride. The hope after the war was a symbol of a new beginning, and she will forever remember it that way. Lo'ak and Kiri are her foundation. Although Kiri didn't come from her blood, her family isn't always by blood. She sees those two as her determination as they fight for their differences, and she will always love them for that. And Tuk. The very innocent Tuk. Her delight. Tuk completed their family when she came along. Her existence brought joy to their family despite all that happened to them. Her innocence, laughter, and never-ending affection for their family are what keep them from falling apart.
Ronal smiled and caressed the head of Kaia, saying, "Young ones are very attached to their mothers the most."
"Maybe it's about time to replace Tuk as the youngest, don't you think?" Jake teases that Tonowari burst into laughter. Ronal just shook her head while Neytiri rolled her eyes despite the excitement pooling at her stomach.
Everyone also laughed, except Loak, who looked like he was about to puke his food out of his mouth, and Tuk, who looked betrayed.
"No!" Tuk protested. Climbing out of Neteyam's lap to sit on Neytiri's lap. Ronal saw this coming, so she got Kaia from Neytiri before Tuk could even process what her father just said. She knew how this family loved to tease their youngest.
Before Tuk could even go to her mother, Jake snatches her and playfully tickles her. Effectively removing the light frown from her cute little face with loud laughterer. effectively removing the light frown from her cute little face with loud laughter. Although she's nine now, she'll always be Sully's little girl.
Ao'nung and Neteyam exchange looks and smiles. Happy to see their family getting along so well. The family continued to eat and chat with each other.
"Ao'nung, how's your training coming along? I hope everything's well." Jake suddenly asked the metkayina heir. Ao'nung turned his head to look at his father.
"Everything's going well, sir. In fact, I'm close to taming a tsurak," he proudly answers.
Toruk Makto nodded with approval. "Well then, you're going to look for a mate after that?"
Neteyam tensed in his seat. The question is not for him, but his mind starts going wild, and his heart is beating fast. He lowered his head slightly but looked at Aonung, who was sitting on his side. His eyes searched for his lover's face, but he just had that laid-back smile he always has and shook his head.
"Training is my priority for now, sir." Mates can come after.
Neteyam's heart fell. His eyes started to water, and a lump started to form in his throat. Neteyam continued to chew the food in his mouth, but it was so hard to swallow when he was trying to suppress a sob. He choked on his food when he was forced to swallow it. Kiri sees him and immediately caresses his back.
"Hey, are you okay?" Kiri asks worriedly and hands him water.
"Wrong piped," he lied, coughing after he drank the water. Neytiri shook her head, her worried frown disappearing.
Neteyam could feel Ao'nung's eyes on him, but he didn't throw a glance at him; instead, he stood up and excused himself after thanking the Tsahik and Olo'eyktan for the food.
As soon as Neteyam's feet stepped outside the clan leader's marui, his tears fell like waterfalls, and he ran.
He didn't stop running when he passed Rotxo on the shore. He didn't stop running when he almost tripped on the branches and big leaves as he entered the forest, and he certainly didn't stop running when he heard that familiar voice calling his name. In fact, he just picked up his pace, determined not to be caught by him.
He just wanted to leave and not see him.
Neteyam's feet brought him to where they shared their first kiss. He was panting. His chest hurts from running, but mostly because he was hurting. He sat on the rock, legs dangling on the lake. His hands fisted the glowing algae.
He should've seen it coming. He knew that Ao'nung would never announce their relationship, and yet his stupid heart hoped that he was man enough to stand up for them because he trusted him and loved him. But he was wrong. Ao'nung basically slapped him with the truth that his title is more important than their love.
And as much as he wants to be angry with him, he can't. Of all people, Neteyam understands the weight of pressure that is currently on Ao'nung's shoulder, and that is what makes it more painful to him.
Neteyam loves Ao'nung so much that he can't be angry with him even if he chooses his life over him.
That's his price for falling in love with the Olo'eyktan's son.
"Neteyam,"
The omatikayan lifted his streaking tears, sniffing and hiccupping. Ao'nung's face softened, and his chest clenched, making his eyes swell up in tears as well.
"Ma'Teyam," he calls again, his voice shaking. He sat next to Neteyam. He lifted an arm to hug his lover, but he gently shook his head.
"Just sta---," he couldn't finish his sentence because of his hiccups, "stay right there."
Panic started to crawl in Ao'nung's body, but he stayed at his spot, afraid he might agitate Neteyam even more.
Neteyam took a deep breath to calm himself before speaking. "Did you know how much I love you?" he asked, a new batch of fresh tears swelling in his golden eyes. "I love you so much that it actually scares me."
You have no idea the things I'm willing to do for you. What he wanted to say but chose not to say. What's the point anyway?
"I love you too." Ao'nung choked, finally letting his tears fall from his eyes.
Neteyam softly chuckles without any humor in it, No, you don't. Because if you do, you could at least tell my dad that you're currently seeing someone. It would give me another reason to hold on to you, you know? Because it's been hard." He swallowed the sob in his throat. "It's been so hard to find reasons why I should still hold on to you."
"Please, don't say that, Ma'Teyam." He felt helpless. Ao'nung wanted to hold Neteyam, hug him, and kiss him, but Neteyam kept him where he was. "I was just—"
"Scared? Pressured? Believe me, I know." Neteyam sniffed. "That's why I'm letting you go." He turned his head to look at him.
Ao'nung froze in his spot, his crystal blue eyes widening in terror. "No," he whispers.
Neteyam gave him a sad smile and said, "I can't be the one who'll keep you from becoming the person you want to be, 'Nung. I love you too much to take that away from you."
Ao'nung didn't care if Neteyam didn't allow him to touch him. He grabbed Neteyam's body and hugged it as if his life depended on it. He pushed his face against his neck, sobbing like a toddler. Ao'nung couldn't remember the last time he had cried so hard like this, but he didn't care. All he cares about right now is Neteyam.
"No, don't say that, please. Please, yawntu. Don't let me go," he pleaded on his neck. "Please."
Neteyam slightly pulled away from him, gathering Ao'nung's handsome face. He stared at his face, the face he loves to look at whenever they're together. Those beautiful crystal blue eyes that shine like the ocean under the sun He wiped his cheek with his thumb. Ao'nung visibly whimpers at his touch.
"My parents are thinking about going back to the forest. Lo'ak will be staying here and will ask for Tsireya's hands." He said he was still wiping Ao'nung's face gently. "I'm going with them," he said, looking at his eyes. "I'm going home."
"You're leaving me?" the Metkayina asks.
Neteyam brought their foreheads together and closed his eyes. "It's what's best for us."
Neteyam and Ao'nung stayed in their spots until they couldn't cry anymore. They just sat there, looking at the lake, neither talking anymore. The only thing they can hear is the forest noise and their occasional sniffing and hiccups. One slowly accepting the breakup and one mourning for the love he couldn't fight. When the sun had finally risen, Neteyam moved slowly and kissed Ao'nung's cheek for the last time.
"Good bye, yawne."
*****
Ao'nung just finished talking with the hunters about the hunting they're going to do for his niece's 7th birthday. As an uncle, Olo'eyktan, Ao'nung wanted to celebrate his only niece's birthday with a grand celebration.
Neriah is, after all, like a daughter he never had.
Five years prior, after Neteyam returned to the forest, Ao'nung replaced his father as the Olo'eyktan. For eight years, Ao'nung was labeled as the mateless Olo'eyktan of the reef Na'vi. Tsireya became Tsahik. Many speculations have arisen as to the reason why the Olo'eyktan of Awa'atlu never had a mate.
Some say his mate died in the battle against the Sky People 20 years ago. Some say Ao'nung chooses to stay loyal and serve his people. Some say the Olo'eyktan is not capable of love.
Ao'nung had heard different stories. Some are close to guessing, and some are just blurting nonsense. But one thing is certain: beyond this vast ocean, man lives where his heart is.
"Uncle Ao'nung!"
Ao'nung stopped in his tracks when he heard that familiar, high-pitched voice. He turned and saw his niece bouncing on the path that connects all Marui. Her mother was trailing behind her.
Ao'nung kneeled and opened his arms to catch Neriah. The light-skinned Metkayina giggled as he blew kisses on her neck. "No!" she whined, her small hands holding his face still, her golden eyes shining brightly.
Her eyes remind Ao'nung of him.
"Brother," Tsireya softly calls. Ao'nung stood up with Neriah in his arms and gave his sister a kiss on the forehead.
"Do you have my present?" Neriah asks excitedly.
Ao'nung fakes a frown. "Present for what?"
"For my birthday! You silly!" she laughed. Ao'nung couldn't help but chuckle at the words she uttered about the sky people. She must have learned it from her father.
"You're the silly Sully."
Tsireya watched her brother and daughter with fond eyes, tickling and giggling with each other. Tsireya knew how much Ao'nung loved Neriah, but sometimes she would catch him looking at her with longing in his eyes. He may not say it, but Ao'nung is yearning for his own family. But how can he build his own if his love is so far away from him?
It saddens Tsireya so much. In everyone's eyes, Ao'nung is a mighty warrior, as is Oloeyktan, but in her eyes, he was just her brother, broken for the love he had lost.
A loud horn interrupted and alerted them. Neriah froze in shock in her uncle's arm. Tsireya and Ao'nung shared a look.
"Newcomers," they both said. Tsireya gathered Neriah into her chest, and they both ran to the shore.
Loud screeches from big animals can be heard as they near the shore. The people who had gathered around the visitors parted when they saw the Olo'eyktan and Tsahik walking towards them. Loak, who was just back from hunting, ran towards Tsireya, and Neriah immediately clung to him.
Ikrans.
The feeling was nostalgic as they walked in the middle of the pathway the people had made for them. But this time it wasn't Tonowari and Ronal who were facing the newcomers as clan leaders; it was them now.
The screeches get louder and the sand flies everywhere as the Ikrans flap their wings, making the butterflies in Ao'nung's stomach fly around so much that it almost hurts and he can feel his head getting dizzy.
It was Neriah who recovered and recognized who the newcomers were.
"Gramma 'Tiri!" She jumped out of her father's grasp and ran towards Neytiri. The ever-beautiful, mighty warrior of Pandora's forests laughed and bent her body to catch the running ball of sunshine.
Lo'ak trailed after his daughter and hugged his father, "Dad!"
Jake chuckles and ruffles his son's braided hair. "I see you, son," he said.
Ao'nung watched as his niece and Lo'ak greeted their Omatikaya family, and then his eyes saw familiar golden orbs looking at him. His breath hitched.
Ao'nung felt different emotions at once. He wanted to run to him too, like Neriah did, but his feet seemed stuck on the sand. He wanted to cry, but he couldn't. After giving Neriah a kiss on the forehead, he slowly walked up to him.
He still looks the same, but different. His hair is still braided with beads that sway when he walks. He's taller than the last time he saw him, but Ao'nung still towers over him. His waist looks smaller with that waist piece he was wearing. He looks mature, aged from the past 20 years, but he still looks beautiful—no, he looks gorgeous.
Neteyam stopped in front of him, and Ao'nung almost cried when those golden eyes looked up at him slightly wet, just like his. Neteyam cracked his smile, the smile that always took Ao'nung's breath away, and said,
"I see you, Ma'Nung."
Ao'nung let out a shaky breath, a tear falling from his eyes, and chuckled. "I see you, Ma'Teyam."