Chapter 2
Yelena’s whole body was in fight-or-flight mode. Fighting is all she ever did with the Winter Soldier.
She met him when she was eight and trained with him until she finally escaped at fifteen years.
All she ever did when she was with him was train. Pushing herself beyond what her body was capable of to avoid punishment.
She was eight and sparring with a grown man that could easily throw her around. There was rarely a session where she wouldn’t leave without shedding blood. There were few instances where her bones got broken.
One session she left with a broken arm and a cut on her head that was gushing blood everywhere. She couldn’t get off the floor and was later punished for failing to finish the session.
She was nine.
The Winter Soldier was quiet. He had only ever spoken a handful of words to her. He usually just barked at her “More” or “Harder”.
She was never able to please him until she finally killed someone in front of him. He just gave her a curt nod of approval and gave her the night off.
So, Yelena killed more and more people to save herself from training. She learned to use her tiny frame to hurt full-grown men that could snap her like a toothpick with one wrong move.
She had finally made somebody proud of her. That slight incline of the head whenever she got stronger always urged her to keep going until she pulled muscles or sprained her wrists.
“Come back to me, little one,” Hands are cupping her face and Yelena’s eyes flicker up to look at Natasha. She hadn’t even realized that she zoned out. “There you are. Are you back with me?”
Yelena gives a small nod and looks down. They were sitting on the ground. Always were when Yelena disassociated. Her wrists were pinned between Natasha’s knees and her arms were red from clawing at them.
Natasha lets her wrists go and Yelena moves to sit between Natasha’s legs instead, feeling her sister wrap her arms around her.
“I know him,” Yelena voices the thought that had been stuck in her head. “That man. The Winter Soldier.”
“He’s not that person anymore,” Natasha tells her softly. “But he hurt you. I understand that.” Her hand smooths Yelena’s hair back.
Yelena leans into the touch. “I didn’t know he was there with the Avengers.”
“I didn’t know you knew him,” Natasha could have been up with the other Avengers but here she was with Yelena.
She had picked Yelena over the Avengers and the thought comforted Yelena greatly.
“He… trained me… in the Red Room,” Yelena tilts her head up to look at Natasha. “Since I was eight.”
Natasha is quiet and Yelena lets out a small sigh. “Do you remember when we were little and mama said that pain makes us stronger?” Yelena asked quietly.
Natasha lets out a hum of acknowledgment, her fingers idly stroking Yelena's hair.
"It doesn't. Pain just hurts."
Yelena knows that Natasha wants to go and greet the others and not leave Tony all alone with them. She sucks up her feelings and shoves them away to deal with later. She squished against Natasha’s side as they approach the common area where the others are. She doesn’t care how childish or young it makes her look.
She keeps her eyes on the Winter Soldier the whole time. He barely even glances at her. Did he really not remember her?
“And who is this?” Captain America steps forward with a smile, holding out his hand.
“This is my sister, Yelena,” Natasha’s arm is wrapped around her. “Yelena, this is Steve Rogers.”
Yelena reaches out to grip his hand, looking up at the tall man before she grins, trying to get her mind off of the Winter Soldier. “Natasha says I can fly a plane better than you.”
Whatever was going to come out of her mouth, Steve was clearly not expecting that. “Is that so?” He chuckles, glancing at Natasha.
“Oh, come on. You’re a terrible flyer,” Natasha tells him. “She’s sixteen and a better flyer than you.” She proudly boasts and Yelena can’t help but smile.
“I don’t fly that badly,” Steve gives an offended scoff but his lips are twitched upward in a grin.
Natasha introduces her to Wanda Maximoff and Sam Wilson.
Steve introduces the Winter Soldier when she doesn’t.
“This is my friend, Bucky,” Steve clasped the man on the shoulder, and Yelena half expects the man to turn and strangle him with his metal arm. The man instead lets out a nervous smile, more emotion on his face than Yelena had ever seen him give.
The Winter Soldier holds out his non-metal arm but Yelena doesn’t take it because if she does then she’s going to fight him and that would be bad.
“Do you know who I am?” She can’t help but blurt and it startles him enough to drop his arm.
He looks her over and resignation fills his eyes. “Who did I kill?”
She feels Natasha grip the collar of her vest before she can lunge forward. “Do you know who I am?” She demands again, this time in Russian.
He’s staring at her and Yelena’s fingers move toward her pocket but Natasha is pulling her back and gripping her wrists to keep her calm.
“Yelena--” Natasha pulls her close. “You need to calm down.” She whispers.
“I can’t!” Yelena squirms in her sister’s grip, her heart pounding dangerously in her chest. She shoves a finger at him, Natasha’s hand still gripping her wrist. “Do you know who I am!?”
“No!” Winter Soldier tells her, his voice loud and it automatically makes Yelena still because that was one of the many words she got used to him yelling at her. “Who are you?!” He demands.
The words leave her mouth faster than Yelena can control them. “I am a widow, I am made of marble. I am a soldier, ready to comply.” The reply was automatic.
Winter Soldier jerks back like he had been hit, a grunt escaping his lips as he looks over her once again. “I do know you?” It’s phrased like a question as he stares down at her.
Yelena points a finger at the scar just behind her ear that runs up into her hair. “You did this to me. This and so much more!” She hissed.
He moves toward her as if to get a closer look but all Yelena can do is flinch and prepare herself for a hit.
He freezes in place, Natasha moving between them and pushing him back away from her. “Back off,” Natasha tells him.
“I didn’t-- I don’t--” Winter Soldier is stumbling over his words, something Yelena had never seen him do before, just as he blurts out “I’m sorry!”
Yelena has so much more that she wants to say but her body is practically vibrating with pent-up energy and the need to fight or run.
Natasha notices this, turning and gripping Yelena’s vest to start to tug her toward the door. Yelena follows, much too worked up to fight her off. Natasha takes her down to the gym, somewhere Yelena had yet to be.
Natasha grabs some tape for her knuckles, tossing it to her. “Wrap your hands, we’re gonna spar.”
Yelena doesn’t protest. She starts to wrap her knuckles up expertly, watching the white tape wind around her hands. “Vest off,” Natasha calls out. “Shoes too. No weapons.”
Yelena takes her boots and vest off, taking any extra weapons she stored on her person and adding them to the pile.
Natasha is waiting for her on the mat. Yelena steps onto the mat, glancing up at her sister.
“Come at me and don’t hold back,” Natasha tells her, getting into stance.
Yelena listens. She fights and doesn’t hold back. She’s too emotional to fight clearly. Natasha keeps knocking her down and she keeps getting back up, hearing Winter Soldier’s voice in her ear ‘more!’.
Yelena fights until she can’t anymore, sweaty and broken on the mats as she finally breaks into heart-wrenching sobs.
Natasha finally collapses next to her and takes her hand.
“It’s not fair--” Yelena sobs, clinging to her sister’s taped hand. “Why does he get to forget?”
“I’m sorry,” Natasha said softly because she doesn’t know what else to say.
“He can’t just forget me…” Yelena continues, tears blurring her vision. “He knew me for half of my life, he can’t just forget about me just-- just like that.”
She doesn’t know why it hurts her so much. Maybe it was because she had once craved his praise and approval so much. Maybe it was because he had hurt her so much. Maybe she was just jealous that he could forget about those he hurt.
Natasha had sat up at one point and pulls Yelena into her lap, not caring that they were sweaty messes coated in bruises and anger.
Yelena leans into her sister, absolutely exhausted. “I didn’t know he was coming.”
“I didn’t know you knew him. I would never hurt you on purpose, little one,” Natasha said softly and Yelena lets out a small whine. “I wouldn’t have let him come if I knew.”
“I know that,” Yelena reaches up to dig the heels of her palms into her eyes because she’s far too emotionally compromised at the moment. “I know you wouldn’t.”
They sit on the mat in the gym for a long time. Natasha eventually nudges her, prompting her to shower so that they could go eat.
Yelena takes out her notepad after showering and writes down a new name under relationships.
Winter Soldier- enemy, do not trust