Chapter 2
The next morning, you felt like complete and utter shit. After getting up and making your way out of the warehouse, you felt the tell-tale signs of a stress drop coming. There was an uncomfortable buzzing in your head, making you feel disoriented and dizzy. Your limbs were heavy, and your senses heightened. Form the moment you stepped outside; everything was overwhelming. The brightness of the sun on the sidewalk, the roar of cars passing by, the stench of garbage and exhaust.
You fought the urge to cover your ears, but instead of heading to the square like you normally would, you found yourself stumbling towards Bullet’s place. You were only just able to knock on the makeshift door before you fell to your knees with a whine. You almost cried out with relief when Bullet opened the door, immediately moving to crouch beside you.
You hadn’t had a stress-drop like this in years – not with being on suppressants. If Bullet wasn’t around, your Red Room training had always been able to hold these drops off until he was, no matter how much it hurt. But this was different. This… this was unbearable.
“Oh god, Nixie, what happened?” he asked, wrapping his arms around you. It didn’t feel as good as it usually did though. It wasn’t working. You whined loudly. It didn’t take Bullet long to realise that there was a scent on you that stood out from the rest. “Y/n, did you- did you meet one of your soulmates?” you nodded against his chest, curling into yourself as a truck roared past on the street. “Where can I find them?”
“A- Avengers,” you force out.
Your thoughts were jumbling together as you dropped further. Tears crawled down your face as you trembled and whimpered softly, agony pulsing through your body as you well and truly reach your stress-drop.
“Hold on, Y/n.”
“How could you not make her come back, Nat!” Wanda asked, irritated.
It was breakfast time at the Tower, and Natasha had just told the group where she’d been last night. The Avengers were broken into two packs: Steve, Tony, Bucky and Bruce; and Wanda and Nat. The two packs had kind of merged into one since they lived together, so whilst they were two different soulmate groups, they acted as one pack. Steve was head alpha, then Bucky, then Nat, then Wanda. Bruce was a beta and Tony an omega. To any outsiders, they may as well all have been the same pack.
“How come you didn’t tell me?!” Wanda continued, trying to get an answer out of her soulmate. She was understandably upset that Natasha hadn’t told her about meeting Y/N. “Where is she?”
“I couldn’t force her to come back with me. I tried to talk her into it, she went to walk away, I grabbed her to try and argue, but she looked terrified. If I’d forced her to come back with me, she would’ve resented us. She knows where to find us anyway. She’ll come eventually. She can’t stave off her drop forever,” Nat snapped.
Just as Nat finished, the doorbell rang.
“J.A.R.V.I.S who’s there?” Tony asked.
“I’m not sure, sir. They are not in any facial recognition databases.” J.A.R.V.I.S showed a hologram image from the security cameras of the front door, and Nat was instantly on her feet.
“That’s her,” she breathed. Nothing more needed to be said, the team stood and headed to the door, all interested to meet Nat and Wanda’s omega.
The moment the door opened; your senses were overwhelmed by the scents of alphas. You whined as the pain in your body turned to lava, burning you from the inside out. You curled into Bullet, your entire body shaking and trembling, out of your control.
“God,” Bullet growled, “Will some of you back off?” You whined at his aggressive tone until he hushed you. “You’re alright, luv. You’re alright.”
Nat could smell your stress from where she stood, and she also smelt it flare up the moment the pack stepped forwards. A wave of protectiveness over her omega threatened to drown her.
“Guys, back off. I’ve got this.”
“Nat,” Steve warned, his voice low. He was head alpha, but Nat wasn’t backing down on this. Y/N was her omega, not Steve’s. They may be one pack, but Y/N was her soulmate.
“Steve, I’m the only one here who’s actually had a conversation with her. Back. Off.” Consequences of lashing out be damned. That could wait.
“We’re talking about this later,” Steve promised as he and Bucky moved the group back upstairs, much to their displeasure.
“And who the hell are you?” Nat asked, turning on the alpha who held her omega in his arms.
“A friend,” he responded calmly, not rising to her challenging tone. “She needs her soulmate. I’m not enough right now.”
As if to accentuate his point, you whined softly as you felt the tug come back full force. You felt yourself being guided forwards, but your entire world was spinning, and you were so confused, and you had no idea where you were. And you were so cold. The pain in your body was fire, but you felt like ice. Like when you played in the snow with no gloves and immediately went inside to put your hands in front of a fire, and it burned but you couldn’t decide if it was hot or cold. Tears blurred your vision, and terror enveloped your mind as Bullet slowly let go of you. You cried out, unable to formulate words as waves of agony rolled through your body.
And then you smelt an unfamiliar scent, and strange arms were wrapping around you, and for a moment you panicked, because you didn’t know this person, but it felt so good. You melted into the stranger’s arms, the stranger who you faintly remembered from the other night and what felt like a million years ago. The pain faded slightly, and the buzzing in your head lessened. It wasn’t gone, you were too far into your stress-drop for it to be fully gone, but it was getting closer to bearable now.
You didn’t fight it as you were lifted off your feet and into Natalia’s arms. You buried your face in her neck, her scent strong and calming there. She was so warm too. It was like a balm to your cold skin. You wrapped your arms around Natalia’s neck, snuggling closer to her.
“I live just around the corner if you need me,” you heard Bullet faintly yell after Nat, “Number 53, Apartment 4!”
Nat didn’t respond. “That’s it, sweetheart. Such a good girl. I’ve got you.” The praise warmed you from the inside out, and your pitiful whining was replaced with a soft purr. It was broken at first, rusty, almost. You hadn’t purred in so long. But eventually, you fell into a rhythm. Your eyes felt heavy with the exhaustion of coming out of a drop, but you sensed an alpha approaching you and you stiffened slightly. Nat noticed immediately and soothed you, “It’s okay, gorgeous. You’re safe, okay?”
“Nat, Bucky and I set up a nest in the spare room.”
You don’t quite understand all the words, your brain too muddled to make meaning of them, but when Natalia carried you into a dark room with warm, dim lights, you can just make out a nest of pillows and blankets. Nat sits down slowly and guides you to lie curled up in her lap before she pulls a blanket over your body.
Your purring resumed, the sound making Nat smile slightly, “There you go. Such a good girl.”
You drop further and further until you’re unsure if you’re even on earth anymore. Being with one of your soulmates in a nest in a drop is unlike anything you’ve ever experienced before, and it feels so goddamn nice. You never want to leave.
It was two hours later when you finally came back to your senses. You must’ve fallen asleep at some point, because the next thing you were aware of was someone running their finger through your hair, and- oh god, you were lying on their lap. You sat up suddenly, startling the alpha as you try to regain your bearings frantically. Now that you were out of that submissive mind-state, everything appeared different.
“Hey, hey, calm down,” she touched your arm, but you jerked away from her, standing quickly. You felt better than before. Not 100%, but like, 84% at least. You moved away from her hurriedly, ignoring the fact that part of you hated moving away from where you’d felt so comfy and warm and safe. “Calm down.” You scented Nat’s pheromones, egging you to relax. Your muscles did so as a reflex, no matter how much you didn’t want to.
“Stay away from me,” you muttered as she took a step towards you. You stumbled backwards to keep the distance between you two, immediately putting a mask back over your expression.
“Okay, okay,” the alpha said, raising her hands slowly. “If I wanted to hurt you, I would have done it already.” She had a point there, you supposed, “What’s your name?”
“Y/n.” So she didn’t remember you then.
“Hi, Y/n, I’m Natasha Romanoff.”
So, she’d changed her name. Good to know. You nod in response to her words, swallowing thickly. You didn’t like this. Being in a room – in a building – with a bunch of alphas you didn’t know. Not to mention the fact that a large percentage of them were enhanced. But on the other hand, you knew that if you left, you’d just be back tomorrow, and the cycle would begin all over again.
You despised your lack of choice in the matter. You felt kind of shitty for complaining – you were here, in a pack that happened to be closely intertwined with a billionaire whilst Bullet was with a pack struggling to get enough money for food – but at least he’d had a choice in the matter. Alphas weren’t affected the ways omegas were when separated from their packs, and to you that seemed unfair, plain and simple. So no, you didn’t want to stay here, and no, you didn’t have a choice.
“Do you want to meet the others?” You didn’t, not really, but you supposed you’d have to meet them eventually, so you nodded. “You can tell them to back off if it gets too much, okay?”
“I’m fine,” you forced yourself to say, trying to ignore the haze in your mind that was there to remind you that you’d only just come out of a drop.
“You’re anxious,” Natalia stated bluntly, reading you like the well-trained spy you knew she was. You didn’t quite know how to respond to her statement. Thankfully, it didn’t seem that the redhead wanted a response. “Let me help you. Please.”
You hadn’t realised she’d stepped closer to you until her pheromones hit your nose. You shoved her away.
“I don’t need your help,” you snapped at her, your Red Room training coming back into play as you pushed down your omega side. “And don’t you fucking dare patronise me like I’m some child that needs to be protected.” You stepped forwards threateningly and lowered your voice a notch. “I don’t need to be protected, and I certainly don’t want to be protected.”
Natalia, to her credit, didn’t outwardly react, and instead simply inclined her head. “Hey, I know you’ve got a lot going on, but you don’t need to take your anger out on me. I’m just trying to help you."
“Why?” You demanded. “What’s in it for you?” There always had to be something in it for both parties. If Madam B and the streets had been consistent in one thing, it was that.
“You’re my soulmate,” she answered, as if that explained everything.
“And you lived without me for decades, so you certainly don’t need me.”
“Sure, but you need me,” she retorted. “And maybe I want to help you because – oh I don’t know – it’s in an alpha’s biological nature to want to defend omegas, especially their soulmates?”
You stared her down for a moment, trying to find any ill-intent in her eyes. You found none. You supposed that perhaps you were being a little irrational, but you also had a right to be sceptical.
When she didn’t speak for a while, you said, “If you’re waiting for an apology, look elsewhere, otherwise you’ll be waiting a long time.”
A small smile quirked at the corner of her lips. “Do you want to go meet the others now?” After a moment, you nodded, slightly less tense after having that short, yet not very intense sort-of argument with Nat. You knew if she was really irritated, you’d feel it in the way an omega would feel an alpha’s anger, so you didn’t think she was actually angry with you at any point in that argument, and that made you feel alright about it.
As you entered the common room, you found yourself eyeing the place like you were on a mission. You knew that that would make you feel more comfortable. If you acted like this was a mission, there was at least something you could control. The pack are your targets. Your objective: infiltrate and construct profiles. First objective, check, second, in process. You identified the exits, dead ends, made a mental map of the place using the corridors you’d walked through, etcetera. You knew you were tense, but maybe a little stress would be good for you. Relaxing in a strange place had only ever led to disaster before, right?
The group was sitting around a coffee table, with three of them on a sofa and one in an armchair. They all looked to you as you and Nat entered. They must have some sort of multiple soulmate group pack, you thought. It wasn’t uncommon for pack to merge if one couldn’t find all their soulmates, especially if they were missing an omega or alpha.
After what seemed like an eternity, Cap stood up. “I’m Steve,” he introduced. “That’s Bucky, Tony, Wanda and Bruce. You obviously already met Natasha.”
You surveyed the rest of the group, your expression schooled and purposefully blank. Steve was clearly head alpha of the pack. He had a strong build, but he looked like the ‘stern, but fair’ type. Tony, who’d been leaning against the alpha seemed to be an omega, judging from the way he’d been curled up next to the blonde. Your eyes caught on the collar that was sat around his neck. You stiffened ever so slightly. Would they expect you to wear a collar too? Focusing on his scent, you realised that your instincts had been correct. Somehow you were relieved at knowing you weren’t the only omega in the pack. It made you feel less alone and alienated. Bruce looked like a fairly neutral beta. He radiated an energy of calm, which you liked. Wanda simply regarded you quietly, deep green eyes that had an intelligent light behind them. Lastly there was Bucky. You had to say, your eyes stayed on him for a little longer. You felt like you knew him. And then you caught sight of a metal hand, and you realised where you knew him from. Instructor Yakov. He’d been one of the training instructors in the Red Room. You stiffened but kept your expression carefully blank. You could figure out why he was here later, and you supposed that if he was part of the Avenger’s pack, there was a valid reason. Still, you looked away quickly, not willing to relive those particular memories – or rather, traumas.
“So,” Steve stood, clapping his hands together, the sharp crack almost making you flinch. Almost. But you weren’t about to show your weakness, not here, not now, and certainly not in front of the others. “I think we should have a pack meeting. Y/n, Natasha, have a seat.”
Natalia headed over to where Wanda was sitting. The younger alpha stood obediently, allowing Nat to settle herself in the chair before moving onto the alphas lap and resting her head in the crook of her neck to whisper something that made Nat chuckle. You could tell instinctively that Wanda was your other soulmate.
The lack of contact hit you harder than you would have liked it to, but you made your way over to the only other chair and settled yourself there, knees to your chest. You had half a mind to curl into the fabric as if you could hide from the world, but you were afraid that that would make you look weak, and you couldn’t afford to show them any form of weakness. Not yet at least. In all honesty, you king of wished the world would just fade away. You were exhausted, and dehydrated, and chronically malnourished, and you had a headache, and the rest of your body was just sore and heavy after your drop, and there were a multitude of things other than those that made you want to go home and curl up next to the fire, surrounded by nonjudgmental stray dogs, cats and rats.
“Y/n, you still with us?” You jerked slightly as Steve said your name, breaking you out of your daze.
“Yeah.” You cursed yourself for your momentary lapse in concentration, and you quickly regained any control of your features that you’d lost in the time you’d spent spacing out. You bit your tongue in an attempt to stay in the present. You needed to focus, and although the fog in your brain – residue from your drop – made it difficult, it wasn’t impossible. You’d been trained to deal with difficult. You could still deal with difficult.
The alpha nodded before continuing, and this time, you forced yourself to pay attention. “Okay, so pack structure: I’m head alpha, Bucky’s my second, then Nat, then Wanda. Bruce is our beta, and then there’s Tony, as an omega, followed by you.” Of course, you were at the damn bottom of the pack. That was one of many things you’d hated about the idea of pack life – the omegas were always at the bottom. “Any questions so far?” You shook your head. “Great, now onto pack rules.” Now you had to interrupt.
“Hold on,” you cut in, ignoring the alpha’s irritated, short growl. “You’ve known me for what, five minutes, and now you want me to do whatever you say when you say it?”
“That’s not what the pack rules are about.”
“Then what are they for if not to control those beneath you?”
A muscle ticked in the Captain’s jaw. His voice was forcefully steady when he spoke, but it was also bordering on the edge of being his alpha voice. “The rules keep order. They ensure that no party is left feeling guilty for something they did, and most importantly they ensure that no one gets hurt. Physically or emotionally.”
You looked away, suddenly finding the blank TV screen very interesting as you ground your teeth to prevent yourself saying something you’d regret. You supposed he had a point, but you’d lacked boundaries in your life since you were seventeen, and now suddenly being dropped into this pack with rules and structure seemed like a lot.
“Y/n? You there?” the voice was Nat’s this time, and you met the alpha’s concerned gaze, nodding sharply before forcing your eyes back to Steve.
“Okay then. The basic rules that apply to the entire pack: no hurting each other intentionally. That means emotionally as well as physically. We respect each other here, so that means no purposefully ignoring each other, no yelling or swearing at each other. If you have a problem with someone, talk it over like adults. There’s also no using your powers on each other. The safeword here is red for stop and yellow for slow down. Green just means you’re good. Think traffic lights. We also need to be honest with each other, no lying. Rules for alphas-.” Your brow creased at this. You supposed pack life was new to you, but you’d never thought alphas would have rules too. “Any alpha can reprimand by punishment, but at any time, a beta- or omega- can safeword and they’ll stop. Alphas are also subject to punishment, me included. Now for your rules,” you bristled slightly, but held your tongue. “You need to look after yourself. That includes eating properly, drinking enough, getting a good amount of sleep, etcetera. As well as this, you need to tell someone if you’re injured or you need to drop. Finally, whenever, if you ever want or need to have a session with someone in the pack, it’s the responsibility of the alpha involved to clearly state what’s going to happen and if necessary, why it’s happening.” He fell silent and looked at Yakov – Bucky. “Anything that I missed?”
“Yeah,” Nat cut in. You heard Steve growl softly in warning at the interruption. “No one here enters each other’s rooms without explicit permission or if there’s an emergency. Your room is your safe space.”
You were going to have your own room? You didn’t quite know why this surprised you – lots of omegas you know have their own rooms, and it wasn’t exactly like the Avenger’s Tower was short on space. You supposed it was because you’d never really had a place to call your own before. Not really, anyway.
“If you ever need any reminding of the rules, there’s a list up on the fridge in the kitchen through there,” he pointed towards where you supposed the kitchen was. “And speaking of, anything in a public space is free for anyone unless otherwise specified. So you can eat whatever you want whenever unless someone’s name is on it, and use any of the stuff in the common rooms.”
“Don’t touch anything in my labs,” Tony added quickly. Cap nodded in agreement.
“Any questions?” the alpha asked.
You were tempted to ask whether you were allowed to leave the Tower alone, but you supposed you could pull an ‘ask for forgiveness rather than permission’ type deal. So instead, you shook your head.
The pack sat in uncomfortable silence for a moment before Wanda spoke. “We usually watch a movie on Fridays. Do you have any favourites?”
“I-uh…” in truth, the only movie you’d ever watched was Snow White, and that had been in the Red Room. You’d had to recite each and every line, and the credits, risking getting a punishment if you failed to do so flawlessly. In short, you’d never really ‘watched’ a movie. You forced a tense smile. “No. I don’t have any favourites.”
“Right,” Tony said, “Should we head into the cinema?”
You raised your eyebrows.
“Surprised there’s a cinema here, Y/n?” Nat asked with a small teasing grin as the group stood and began to meander out of the room.
“Until today I was sleeping on cardboard mats surrounded by stray dogs,” you chuckled, but the pack didn’t.
“If your living conditions were so terrible, why did you avoid coming here until it was necessary?” Wanda asked, a slight lilt to her accent.
“It’s nice to visit, but it’s better at home, I suppose,” you said, stuffing your hands in your pockets. You didn’t quite know what to think about where you should be staying. I mean, you loved your warehouse. It wasn’t fancy – actually, it wasn’t even nice – but you’d kind of made it home. It gave you all you needed, really. Shelter, somewhere to trap the heat that you could create with your powers, even company if the occasional stray was feeling up to it. If you were being totally honest with yourself, no matter how much you’d tried to keep your distance from the animals at first, they’d gotten to you, and you had to admit that you were worried about how they were going to fare in the winter without you there to supply them with heat. Oscar, one of the first you’d befriended, was getting old now, and you knew that soon he’d go somewhere, and you wouldn’t see him again. It saddened you to think that last night could possibly be the last time you’d pet him. You considered telling them about the strays, but somehow that seemed too personal. So instead, you said, “Besides, it was shitty, but it was home. I’m going to miss it.”
“You’re not trapped here, you know,” Nat said with a quiet, if slightly forced, chuckle, “You can go visit.”
You looked her in the eyes, tempted to say something, but quickly realising it wasn’t worth it. Instead, you turned your head back to Wanda. “Your accent… it’s Sokovian, isn’t it?”
“Yes, how did you know?” Wanda recognised that you were veering the conversation away from you, but she figured she shouldn’t push – not yet anyway.
“I’ve met a couple people from Sokovia here and there.” That was a flat out lie. You’d been on a three-month mission whilst working for the Red Room that had been based in Sokovia.
Nat quirked an eyebrow at the vagueness of the statement. “So, you’ve been in Russia too?”
Had it not been for one and a half decades of training, your steps would have faltered. Instead, you plastered a look of confusion on your face and turned your head to the woman on your other side, “What are you talking about?”
“’It’s nice to visit, but it’s better at home’. That’s a Russian phrase.”
“Have you been to Russia then?” You asked, looking forwards again as you subtly tried to push the topic away from you yet again. Of course, you already knew the answer, but she didn’t know you knew that.
Nat surveyed you closely. “I grew up there,” she replied, letting you change the topic as you arrived at the cinema.
The room had a dark-red colour theme, with plush carpets and a plentiful pile of pillows and blankets in front of two sofas that looked kinda like movie theatre chairs without the armrests in between. A large screen took up the entirety of one wall, and everything from the cupholders to the lights looked fancy. A ring of LED lights ran along the edges of the ceiling, lit up in a soft golden.
You waited and watched as the others took their seats. As you expected, it seemed that this was an almost planned sort of thing. No one had to work out who sat where, but rather people just moved to spots. Bruce took one of the movie-theatre-like seats on the end, and Natalia sat close to him, allowing him to lean into her slightly. Captain and Bucky settled themselves next to the other two whilst Tony and Wanda settled on the floor, already rearranging pillows and blankets. The pack may be from two different soulmate groups, but looking at them now, you couldn’t tell.
“Y/n come have a seat down here with us,” Wanda offered, noticing your lurking. You dipped your head gratefully. You supposed that you were thankful for the way she’d offered guidance without making it sound like an order. Something about Wanda seemed familiar. You didn’t know her, you knew that much, but she somehow acted like a few of the street kids you’d met before. Like when you’d first entered the common room, her gaze wasn’t neutral like Bruce’s, but more like it was calculating, as if she was summing you up. From what little interaction you’d had with her, she seemed rather intuitive. Maybe you were searching for normalcy where there was none, but you could see Wanda making it out on the streets.
You knelt down beside the two, on the other side of a small wall of pillows they’d created, unsure of what to do. Their movements seemed purposeful, practised, and you didn’t really want to get in the way of whatever they were doing. Wanda rolled her eyes at your actions and knocked the stack in front of you over before grasping your wrist and tugging you into the little pillow fort.
“You’re a part of the pack now, Y/n. I promise you’re not intruding.” There it was again, that perceptiveness that you’d never really seen outside of the Red Room or the bands on the streets. “Here,” she said, passing you a pillow, “Stack that one over there.”
Smiling faintly, you reconstructed the wall she’d knocked down, albeit hesitantly.
“You’ve never done this before, have you?” Tony asked, making you look over at the other omega. Was it that obvious?
“I’ve never really… well, nested before.” The Red Room didn’t exactly give me an abundance of ways to do so. One shitty sheet that couldn’t keep away the cold and a rock-hard pillow, not to mention being cuffed to the bed at night.
“Have you never had a nest before?” Tony gaped, like a small child learning that Santa doesn’t exist.
You shrugged, “Once or twice, but I never really felt a need.” You didn’t mention that throughout majority of your life. In fact – since you were thirteen – you’d been on suppressants and that this probably stifled at least a part of your natural urge to nest. You supposed you’d sometimes felt the need to wrap yourself in something soft once or twice in a drop, but you’d never gotten a chance to try it out, apart from earlier that day, obviously. You were distracted as Wanda threw a blanket over you using her magic. You were surprised at its unexpected weight.
“It’s a weighted blanket,” Wanda explained, leaning back onto the foot of the couches and letting Tony curl up at her side. You watched as she ran her fingers through his hair gently and he leant into the contact, closing his eyes contentedly. She lifted her arm, tilting her head in silent question. You shifted closer slightly but didn’t quite curl into her the way Tony did. You couldn’t do that. You couldn’t just trust her the way he did so seamlessly. It just wasn’t in your nature. So, you simply sat beside her, your shoulders only just touching. The alpha seemed content to leave this be and lowered her arm as you moved towards her. Her alpha pheromones were much less intense than the others’, you noticed. Some alphas just had much stronger pheromones than others, but you liked the fact that you didn’t need to constantly fight the urge to cuddle up to Wanda.
Before you’d met your soulmates, you hadn’t been able to notice alphas as much, but now it seemed like your senses have been dialled to eleven when it came to scents. It was kind of nice to have a bit of a sensory break by being near Tony, another omega, and Wanda, who’s pheromones were so steady she could’ve been purposefully controlling them for your sake. In fact, she probably was. Regardless, you were grateful.
“So, what’re we gonna watch?” Bucky asked, flicking through the movie options. You sat back and tuned out until the pack had decided on a movie and started playing it.
You had to admit, you were feeling rather restless. Sitting down and doing nothing just wasn’t something you did or ever had done. You shifted again for what seemed like the twelfth time in the first ten minutes of the film, rearranging your legs to be more comfortable.
“You okay?” you heard Wanda ask quietly as she gently rested a hand just above your knee. Even the small touch had your mind racing. You shut your eyes tightly as you tried to suppress the feeling. You hated how a simple movement affected you this much. Fuck being an omega. You so desperately just wanted to be in control of your own emotions but being rather anxious already made that tremendously difficult.
“I’m fine,” you answered, your voice betraying your irritation at your lack control.
The alpha raised a sceptical brow as she heard your tone and snaked her arm around the back of your shoulders. She tugged you towards her gently, and your spine stiffened as you were torn between wanting to maintain at least some distance to the alpha you barely knew and desperately wanting the contact.
“Wanda, I- just stop.”
The alpha obeyed immediately, letting you go, searching your features for any explanation as to the tone of your voice. But she found nothing; your face was a mask again. This just felt like too much too soon. You felt like an intruder in an entirely different world. You didn’t know any of these guys, and this place was just so different from the warehouse, from home. And yeah, it was a crappy home, but it was home. You’d never been an overly sentimental person, but god you missed your home. You missed the graffiti on the walls, the firepit, the constant noise of animals scurrying around, the musty smell that you’d grown so accustomed to. And suddenly this place seemed too quiet, too clean, too warm, too comfortable, too much of everything the warehouse wasn’t.
You got to your feet, ignoring the various questions and protests of the pack, and walked out, shutting the door firmly behind you. You went into the common room, lowering yourself to lie down in a spot behind the couch where the floor was hardwood. It wasn’t quite the same as the hard, filthy concrete floor of the warehouse. You could smell the polish, feel the lack of dust, but it was enough. You just lay there on your back your hands in your hair and your eyes closed, breathing in and out.
The door opened somewhere in the room, and you didn’t even bother trying to identify the scent before you snapped, “What do you want?”
“Did Wanda upset you?” It was Steve. The alpha’s voice was low, low enough to set butterflies off in your belly. You looked over to see him lean against the back of the common room couch a respectful distance away.
“No,” you answered plainly, not even bothering to look at him. You didn’t want him to be here, if you were being totally honest. You just wanted space. You wanted to be alone.
“Then what happened?”
“Are you always this demanding?” you sighed. Looking up at him as you propped yourself up on your elbows to pierce him with a glare.
He straightened slightly and took a step towards you. You sat up, eyes narrowing warily as you tried to gauge his intent. He stopped his advance. “When it comes to something that’s making my omegas upset, yeah, I am always this demanding.”
“I’m not your anything. I don’t belong to you and don’t you dare forget that.” You were trying to sound intimidating, but you felt like some of the strength behind your words was lost as you talked up to him.
“Is that what this is about? You think that the moment you join this pack you’ll have no freedom?”
“Don’t try to talk to me about freedom. You’re an alpha. You don’t know what it’s like to need to rely on people despite being raised to be independent.”
“Needing help doesn’t mean you can’t be independent,” he argued.
“It does where I’m from,” you muttered. Steve lowered himself to the floor, and you eyed him suspiciously. “What are you doing?”
“I want to get to know you. None of us know anything about you, and I’d like to change that.”
You scoffed, standing. “That’s bullshit.”
Steve set his jaw. “No, it’s not.”
“What is it with you lot and trying to pry open my darkest secrets? Is it too much to ask for some alone time? Goddamnit,” you hissed the last bit under your breath as you raked your fingers through your head, looking up in an attempt to stop your frustrated tears from falling. Steve stood, reaching out to touch your arm. You jerked away shaking your head. “No. Don’t touch me. I just want to be alone. So just- just go.”
“Your room is down the hall, third on the left. J.A.R.V.I.S, the house AI, can tell you where any of us are if you need us.”
You had to admit, you were a little surprised he was actually backing off, but you weren’t about to question it. So instead, you nodded silently, heading down the hallway and into the room he’d described.