Chapter 1
The lights down the hall flickered endlessly, keeping him awake for hours. He thinks the circuit breaker might be bad, he could probably fix it. The shelter would only hold him for the night though, it wouldn't be enough time to get supplies. They might not even compensate him, no one wanted help from an omega. Besides, he was still recovering. It'd be a while before he'd be able to sleep in a real bed again, the least he could do is try to enjoy it.
Though the thought alone was difficult to swallow. He didn't see how he'd be able to get through the night, not with that damn light. Or the emptiness inside him. Absentmindedly, his hands trailed over his deflating belly, a cruel reminder of what he had lost. It's been a while since he's been alone. Even in the chaos of a crowded city, he had felt that way but he still had his baby. But now he had nothing. Nothing but stretchmarks, and sore breasts, and a bump. A bump that he had become attached to, that he had cherished and watched grow. A bump that he sang softly to in the night, that he had promised to protect and care for. And yet, after all that, he gave him up.
Thirteen grueling hours of labor on the side of a condemned building. Nine months of unbearable pain, his body adjusting to accommodate another life it wasn't ready for. And six hours sat holding the love of his life, facing the biggest decision he would ever have to make. It was agonizing, every single moment of it. On his hands and knees, he had pushed till he nearly collapsed in pain. The sound of a piercing scream had given him the strength to lean up against a wall and just hold his baby. The baby he had made, the most precious thing he had ever laid his eyes on.
An overwhelming sense of pride and protection filled him when he looked down at the pup. Despite all the challenges they went through he was healthy. Ten fingers, ten toes, and a head full of chocolate brown hair. Undoubtedly, he was a Stark, through and through. Though he'd never be as fortunate as he had been when he was born. It didn't mean he had to suffer though. Tony knew he couldn't keep the baby. Not like this, when he was just a kid himself barely able to take care of his own needs. That wouldn't be a life his son deserved to live.
Still, in the hours that passed as he had gained his bearings, he couldn't imagine a life without him. He wanted to be there for every little thing. The late nights, the diaper changing, the tears. He wanted to hear his first words and laugh when he finally says 'Mama'. He wanted to watch him grow up. He wanted...so much. It made his heartache just thinking about all the possibilities. Had he been a stronger omega, he'd had left hours ago. Before the bonding process could even begin. Before the baby would cry out for food and warmth. Before he could grow even more attached, not to a bump or an idea. But to a little human, a pup just like him.
Tony wasn't strong though. He wasn't made of iron like all Stark men claimed to be. Nor was he weak. He was just human. And now he was a mother, torn between a rock and a hard place. Sure his little moment would cost him, but it'd be worth it to at least have a memory. To have had the chance to tell him how much he loves him, to apologize for everything, to just hold him. When he'd drop him off at the hospital, into the arms of a better life, it'd be worth it.
Now though, as he laid in the shelter, he wondered if it really was worth it. To have given up everything. He knew it was the best decision he could have made for his pup, but it felt like hell to him. He was useless without his baby. Now, he had no one to love, no one to care for. No reason to live.
He wasted the night staring at the light down the hall. Thinking about all that could have been. Not an ounce of sleep was had, yet lying there on a decent cot was enough to get him moving the next day. Still sore and rounded, he walked down to the bus stop. They'd let him ride for free on weekends, long as he didn't cause any trouble. He wasn't much of a trouble maker any more, but he couldn't stop them from thinking that way. He looked bad, his shoes were falling apart, his clothes torn. And now he was covered in dried blood and birthing fluid.
He just hoped the omega house in Brooklyn would let him. It was the only place willing to keep him now. They couldn't chance it before, too risky to take in an unbonded omega carrying an alpha's pup. Yeah, he was all sorts of trouble these days. They better be careful or he might just comb through the garbage behind Starbucks. At least they were nice to their homeless guest, didn't make them feel like they were a nuisance. Not that folks running the omega house did either, but they certainly didn't make him feel welcome. It was far from his first choice but it was the only option he had.
When the bus came, Tony had fled to the designated seating for omegas—expecting omegas. He cradled his still protruding bump and acted like everything was fine. The soreness he felt from yesterday made it difficult to stand, let alone walk. He didn't think he'd be able to make it to the back of the bus, even if he tried. Though he would have liked to sit away from the prying eyes of the other passengers. They looked at him with such disgust, such pity. He tried not to let them see him break.
"Tony," Natasha had smiled at him warmly when he arrived. She had offered him a place to stay before, long as he didn't have his pup. Her husband refused to take in children, he was right to do so. An omega house could only provide so much, children only complicated matters. "What are you doing here?"
"I had the baby." He replied numbly. His eyes traveled to the ground unwilling to meet hers. "I think he was early."
"Oh," Her smiled dropped at the news. It wasn't often an omega gave up a child. She had hoped this one wouldn't have had to. "Well, lets you get a room. I'm sure you're tired from the journey. Maybe a shower too, they're just down the hall. I'll see if I can-"
"Could I have something to eat first?" He interrupted.
"Of course, come." She turned beckoning him into another room. It was a communal kitchen, outdated but functional. And empty too, he was grateful for that. "I'll get you something light so you don't get sick."
"Thank you."
"Oh don't bother. I'm happy to help."
"Still you didn't have to go through all this trouble...I know I'm not worth it."
The beta paused at his tone, head deep in the confines of a refrigerator. If it wasn't just them she would have mistaken it for background noise. But there no disguising the signs of a distressed omega. The poor boy couldn't even hide it.
"Listen Tony," She said turning to comfort him. The thought of a warm meal was long forgotten as she grabbed the first fruit she could find. She placed an orange, no bigger than her palm in front of him. "You are worth so much more. I know that might be hard to understand now, but you have no idea how amazing you are."
Cupping his face in her hands, she looked into his soft brown eyes. They were heartbreakingly beautiful, filled with so much pain. "Every day I have omegas come to me for help. Each one down on their luck, but not one of them is half as strong as you. You, Tony Stark—the boy poets will write about. And from the ashes, you'll rise like a phoenix."