Chapter 25
Toni got the file and sent it to Natasha who passed it onto Shuri.
They were going to work on Yelena’s trigger words. Yelena knew that she had to go back under the first few times until they could target them.
She also knew how much Natasha hated watching her go under. She made the decision to ask Natasha to wait just outside the door. Close enough to help but not close enough to watch.
Natasha objects. Of course she does. Yelena understands but she also really needs Natasha to listen to her.
She pretends she doesn’t hear Okoye pull Natasha aside and tell her that she’ll look out for Yelena.
Shuri promises that she’s made adjustments and that Yelena won’t bleed heavily from the nose again as she fixes BARF back onto Yelena’s head. She looks down at the piece of paper that Yelena had scribbled her trigger words on. “Right. I’ve practiced how to say these in Russian all night. I’m ready. Are you?”
Yelena glances toward the door where Natasha was waiting with Teela on the other side. “Not really…”
Okoye sets a hand onto her shoulder. “You’re safe.” She tells her firmly.
So Yelena swallows hard and gives a firm nod.
“Broken… ballet… six…” Shuri starts to list in Russian. Yelena tenses up. “Handcuff… star… three…”
Yelena’s mind is going fuzzy and her limbs are going numb.
“Small… firefly… fourteen… venus…” Shuri glances up at Yelena.
Yelena feels like she’s floating in a pool of water, weightless and cold.
“Yelena?” Shuri questioned. Yelena doesn’t reply. She can’t. She hasn’t been given an order. Her mind doesn’t recognize that name as her own. Shuri glances over at Okoye and Ayo before prompting. “Widow?”
“Ready to comply,” The words leave Yelena’s lips in a bland tone.
Shuri pursed her lips, glancing over at the monitors. “Start listing the word Orange in as many languages as possible.”
Yelena does, her mouth running down the list of languages she knows alphabetically. She stumbles over the pronunciation in Greek. Her mind knows what that means. “I’ve made a mistake. Please correct me so I may do better.”
Shuri frowns. “How are corrections made?” She asked curiously. Inside her own mind, Yelena jolts but she can only watch as her body slides from the table to stand, Shuri moving forward to stop her.
Yelena kisses Shuri hard, her hands trailing over the girl’s body in the way she had been taught to make reparations. Yelena wants to stop. She doesn’t want this. She’s sexually assaulting the princess of Wakanda and she can’t move.
Okoye and Ayo immediately subdue her, yanking her off of Shuri and pinning her back down on the table.
“Okay-- I shouldn’t have asked that,” Shuri wipes her lips on the back of her sleeve. “That was my fault. Bast, I should have asked more questions. James wasn’t this difficult.”
“James is a grown man,” Ayo pipes up. “Yelena is a little girl. They are not the same.”
“Right, right,” Shuri types away at her computer before turning toward Yelena. “Let’s try this again. Broken. Ballet. Six. Handcuff…”
Shuri lists the trigger words again. Yelena feels fuzzy. She’s having a hard time controlling her thoughts. She wants to take a nap.
“Widow?” Shuri prompts again.
“Ready to comply,” Yelena repeats the same answer as before.
Shuri lets out a hum. “That changed something. Let’s try again.”
Shuri keeps repeating her trigger words until Yelena can’t remember anything anymore.
“Yelena?”
There’s someone calling for Yelena. Yelena should reply to them so they don’t have to keep calling.
“Yelena? Yelena Belova?”
She really thinks Yelena should reply. It’s rude to ignore people.
“Yelena. Hey. Yelena. Look at me, little one.”
Wait a moment…
“Yelena, little one, look at me. Come back to me.”
Her name. What is her name? Who are they calling?
“Momma?”
Was that her? Was she the one calling back? Is her name Yelena?
“That’s right, little one. It’s me, it’s momma. Can you open your eyes?”
Then everything hits her all at once and she heaves in a lungful of air as she lurches forward to try and scramble out of the darkness that made her placid and obedient.
Arms wrap around her tightly to keep her firmly in place and Yelena wiggles unhappily in the hold.
“Yelena, it’s okay. It’s me. It’s Natasha. It’s your sister-- your momma,” The hold squeezed her slightly.
Yelena forces her eyes open, assaulted with the blinding light of the lab and Natasha’s bright red hair.
The clock on the wall is nine hours behind. Why was it nine hours behind?
Then it hits her and her eyes grow wide and she jerks to look at Shuri. “How long was I out?”
“Fifteen hours,” Shuri replies, a stack of new files set up along with the recent results of Yelena’s BARF testing.
“Fifteen--” Yelena glances at her sister. “What?”
“Putting you under was easy,” Natasha tells her and Yelena finally lets Natasha pull her into a close hug. “Shuri had to detangle a lot of webs to bring you back out. Do you remember anything?”
“Not after the second set of words,” Yelena admits, leaning against her sister tiredly. “What are the results?”
“I’ve managed to lessen the reaction with each string of trigger words. I’ve also looked at your file. Each of your triggers means something and I think we need to target the memories associated with each trigger word to break them,” Shuri glances at her. “We can do that in our next session.”
Yelena looks down at her hands, taking a moment to flex her fingers and watch as her body reacts when she wants it to. She stares at her fingers as she wiggles and manipulates them.
“Yelena?” Natasha prompts and Yelena jerks her head up to look at her sister. “I’ve been calling your name.”
“I wanna take a nap…” Yelena murmurs. Naps seemed to help after each BARF session.
“Think you can walk?” Natasha asks her and Yelena nods but her legs don’t seem to cooperate with her body just yet. There’s a burning in her calves and thighs.
“Did you make me run around?” Yelena frowns slightly, glancing up at Shuri.
“I had you run through ballet sets,” Shuri said. “Calling out positions.”
Yelena hums and looks up at her sister. “I hurt.”
Natasha wraps her arms around Yelena and Yelena just sinks into them.
“Come on. Let’s go take a nap, yeah?” Natasha kissed Yelena’s forehead before scooping her up. Yelena wraps her arms around her, resting her head onto Natasha’s shoulder.
Okoye and Ayo walk them back, Shuri staying behind to go over the contents of the recent session.
Natasha climbs into bed with Yelena, pulling her close in a way that makes Yelena frown because she can feel the difference between Natasha trying to comfort her and Natasha trying to comfort herself.
Yelena ducks her head down. “I’ve been meaning to ask you something.”
“You know that you can ask me anything,” Natasha runs her fingers through Yelena’s hair.
“Is it okay that I call you mom or-- or momma? I can stop,” Yelena quickly blurts, glancing up at her sister.
“Is that what’s been worrying you? I could tell that there was something you were trying to tell me but couldn’t yet,” Natasha kissed her forehead. “I don’t mind that you call me that.”
“Really?” Yelena stamps down the swell of excitement at the statement. “You don’t think it’s weird or foolish?”
“You want to call me that and I don’t mind you calling me that. What else is there to say? Nobody else gets a say in that,” Natasha pulls the blankets up over Yelena. “You want to call me big sister then do it. You want to call me momma then do it. I don’t mind. I promise.”
Yelena outstretches her arms to her sister and Natasha lays beside her, wrapping her up in her arms.
“You make me feel really safe. I don’t know what I’d do without you,” Yelena murmurs quietly, leaning into the touch. “Sometimes I feel like this is a dream and I’m going to wake up all alone again.”
“Never. You’ll never be alone again,” Natasha whispers the promise, cupping Yelena’s face.
“I know.” Yelena does. She knows it. “I love you… momma.”
Natasha smiles at her softly, her thumb stroking Yelena’s cheek before she leans down and kissed her forehead. “I love you too, little one.”