Left Behind

Peter, even at his early age, is not one to ignore the news. As a result, he's seen Dr Strange before and is aware that he is gifted with mystical powers right out of a movie he'd want to watch with Ned. However, seeing everything up close and knowing it's all real and not staged astounds him. As soon as the specks from the portal reached Tony’s lab, and he stepped out looking like someone casual- he watched Tony’s face turn from shocked to angry. Cleary there was something strained between the two of them.

“It’s this easy, is it? You turn up now to give him back his memories? Why not when I was struggling before? I bet you saw every second I cried, that I missed this kid- and you just show up now and tell me ‘finally’,” Tony snaps. His lips are pursed, his fists clenched as he takes a step towards Strange. Peter watches and waits to see if it’s going to turn physical. It won’t, surely, because the lab isn’t a place for two superheroes to battle it out… right? They’d at least take it outside. Or maybe Tony just has a good clean-up crew. “God, Strange. You really know when to pick your moments.”

Strange glances over at him, and then at Tony. His eyes turn dark. “But it wasn’t about you. These are Peter’s memories. Even if you were ready, which I don’t believe you were, we had to wait for him. And the moment you took that step and told him to come here- he believed you. He believed that these doubts he’s been having were linked to you and it was only then he was ready for his memories to come back. Magic isn’t as easy as you believe it to be, Stark- and I won’t apologise for letting you suffer because of it. If we had rushed this, the consequences would be worse, and I won’t let anything get in the way of my oath to protect this universe.”

There's a pause in the conversation. Strange's announcement is a bit of a shocker, and it's not sugar-coated in the slightest. As the silence persists and the atmosphere becomes uncomfortable, Peter stands there awkwardly. Tony is still in a bad mood. The way he stands, his hands clinched, and the fact that his breathing has been uneven since Strange opened his lips, Peter can tell. He never looks back at Peter, his gaze fixed on Strange—perhaps he's too terrified of looking like this in front of him.

Peter stares at them, unable to bear the intensity of their stare-down. If this continues, Peter may have no choice but to return to the Avengers, which would be terrifying. It's a lose-lose situation for him. There's something tugging him towards Tony, and he's not sure what he'll do if he loses the chance to regain his memories as a result of this conflict. All he wants is to shake some sense into them.

“As much as I appreciate your concern, Dr Strange- and how you’ve obviously missed me, Mr Stark, I’d rather we just forget about everything before and well… help me remember these memories instead,” Peter interrupts. “And if we could do all of it without you two arguing then that would be good. Even if I can’t remember the three of us hanging out, I feel like you do this a lot.”

When Tony sees Peter's determined expression, his aggression transforms into a faint grin. His shoulders relax. Tony walks over to him, drapes his arm over his shoulders, and laughs, startling Peter, who is still focused on preventing a fight from developing. But his smile doesn't reach his eyes, and it's not the way Peter expects it to be. Whatever happened to him has left him broken. He just wishes he knew what that was.

Peter is hoping that the process doesn't take too long. He needs to rediscover the memories he's been missing, or it may be too late, and they'll both feel like unfinished jigsaw pieces until they fade away. And that's not a life he'd want for his greatest enemies, because he needs to be Peter Parker again, and he needs it now.

Tony

Tony stands across the room, watching Peter and Strange debate over what would happen next. Peter looks young—younger than he has ever been in Tony's eyes—as he stands tall and straight, nodding frequently while Strange describes how he'll feel and what to expect. Tony observes Peter's twitching fingers. Peter’s eyes never leave Strange's face and he tries to hide it by tucking his hand into the pocket of his jacket. He has no idea, however, that Tony is well aware of all of his quirks. He couldn't hide a bad mood, or anything else for that matter, from Tony.

Tony’s anxious himself. Of course he is. It’s a surreal experience. From meeting in a time that no longer exists, to Peter becoming a stranger, and now for it to come full circle- he’s not sure if he’s in a dream. Or maybe he’s in a film- the star of a reality show although he doesn’t even know it. Think ‘the Truman show’ but make it more sci-fi.

Tony takes a drink of water, not alcohol, and nods when Strange asks whether they're ready. He stands up and offers Peter a two-second embrace, assuring him that everything would be okay and that he is free to turn around and flee back home at any time. He is under no obligation to bring these memories back. It'll be difficult... as soon as he recalls them. The daily pain—the way he slept alone for weeks following the snap. All his friends and family had vanished, leaving him cold and alone...Tony isn't sure if Peter understands what he is saying, but he refuses to give up regardless.

And it is that same determination that got Tony up every morning. It’s what makes the kid so great.

Strange leads Peter into an empty room right above the lab, which no one ever visits. Tony knocks some old boxes out of the way, seeing old suits and memories he doesn't want to remember in them. He settles into an old chair in the corner of the room and watches while Strange mutters peculiar phrases under his breath that seem like they're part of a spell.

“Tony?” he asks, glancing back at him. Tony’s head looks up as if to ask ‘what?’ and he waits for Strange to elaborate. “I need one of your hairs,” he explains.

Tony blinks. He doesn’t answer for a few seconds. Strange continues to stare… waiting.

“Tony?”

“Why? So that you can do some creepy magic stuff and turn me into a horse? I don’t think so,” Tony shakes his head.

“I wouldn’t dare,” Strange says, with an over-the-top roll of his eyes. “I need a connection to his old life- to these memories he cares for so deeply. So, one piece of hair will do. Unless you want to sacrifice something bigger?”

“Wait- why couldn’t you just do it?”

“Don’t you think I already have, Stark?” Strange groans. “It’s like you don’t want my help. Pete, help me out here?”

Peter looks up at Tony, “Please?” he asks, once. His eyes are so big like a puppy, and he pushes out his bottom lip just a little bit. His eyes get a bit watery too. Tony knows it’s a tactic for him to say yes, but he falls for it anyway.

“Fine,” Tony huffs.

Tony plucks a hair off his head, attempting to ignore Strange's smug smirk as he does. Strange does a small gesture with his hands, and the strand of hair vanishes into thin air. Then, suddenly, there's a surge of energy that blocks Tony’s sight for a few seconds. When the white light is gone, Tony looks up, and- Peter? Peter collides with Strange's feet on the floor, collapsing on the spot. Strange, on the other hand, remains stationary. He stands there, looking, as if this was something he anticipated. Even if it was, Tony's heartbeat quickens when he realises Peter is not awake.

“Peter?!”

Tony’s knelt by his body, hand on the back of Peter’s head. But his eyes don’t open. He stays there- as frozen as the day they found Steve in the Arctic. He looks dead. What if Strange was worried that Peter shouldn’t be here? What if this way a way of killing him- of removing him from this timeline? What if he was about to forget him?

He brushes some hair that falls in his eyes, cringing as his head falls back. Desperately, he looks up at Strange who’s still stood still. He hasn’t moved once. “Strange? Strange, what’s going on?” No answer. “Strange?!”

Meanwhile

Peter’s awake- but he’s not sure where he is anymore. He’s stood with Strange, but they’re not in the lab and Tony is nowhere to be seen. The background is black, and if he strains his eyes, he thinks he can see blurred photos of old parts of his life he should know.

“Where are we?” Peter asks, turning over to where Strange’s stood.

Strange grabs him by the wrist, pulls him close and keeps him tight as if he’s going to fly off into the distance. He glares, trying to find an exit to whatever place they’re in. He’s… uncertain. And for all this time he’s known him- be it the few hours they’ve talked- that face on something as brilliant as Dr Strange doesn’t feel right.

Whether he’s done something wrong, or the spell was too dangerous even for him to continue, Peter doesn’t know. All he does know is that he’s scared, and that, in turn, makes Peter more anxious than he was before.

“The stones… I think they’re talking to me.”

“Okay… so I’ve put my trust in someone who thinks he can hear some rocks talking. Right,” Peter mumbles to himself, but he doesn’t let go of Strange. Deep down he knows Strange isn’t crazy and that finding a talking pebble wouldn’t be the craziest thing he’s ever seen. “I’m screwed.”

Peter hears them too, after a while. They’re chatting- like they’re sat in court. Debating whether or not Peter was worthy of having his memories back. People who tried to mess with their power- for nefarious reasons or not- they always yearned for more than they got. They all would end up dead in the end even if it wasn’t the snap that did it. But when Peter snapped... he knew that he’d die. He didn’t see a light at the end of the tunnel- but he did it anyway. And that’s why they brought him back to life and not any of the others. Was it that they felt the love between Tony and Peter too?

A father and son relationship so strong that the stones didn’t want them to remember each other. When love is that strong, as well as the people, sacrifices start to get made and life gets messy. But somehow, even though they tried, Tony didn’t forget Peter. He remembered everything- and their plan to keep them apart for the sake of their own safety didn’t work. After all the pain and suffering, they made their way back to each other once again.

Strange doesn’t speak to him, but Peter hears his heart hammering in his chest. He’s nervous, and Peter knows why. If they say no- then this probably is their last chance to try and get his memories back. As much as him and Tony argue, there’s no denying that all Strange wants to do is help them be whole again.

Peter blinks and he’s stood in front of a council, people who he cannot see but who he can hear and feel- and smell. He falls to his knees, as he feels is custom to the spirits in front of him. “Please,” he whispers.

Strange isn’t here, but Peter doesn’t seem to notice. He begs to remember.

“I need to know who I was.”

“Peter Parker,” one says. A deep, domineering, voice. Powerful. “You’ve protected this world.”

“I’ve tried.”

“You’ve done more than most will do in their entire life, more than generations of families. You deserve a lot,” he says. “But we’re just not sure if it’s the right thing for you.”

“It is,” he interrupts. “I can feel it. I want to know why my heart yearns so much to be around Tony.”

“Even if these memories are laced with more pain that you can even imagine?”

“Even then, sir,” he nods. He smiles bitterly to himself, one tear escaping him before he can hold it back. He stares at the blue floor, running his hand through what he thinks is a cloud. Is this heaven? “I’d feel the worst pains in the world to remember who I am.”

“What if I could make you forget it all? Forget Tony? Forget that feeling of being incomplete? I’d take the memories from Strange and Tony too. You’d live a normal life. Hell, I could even take away those powers of yours,” another voice says. The voice comes from directly next to him, like a whisper in his ear. “You could be Peter. Just Peter Parker. No Spider-Man. Just… you.”

“No.”

“No?”

“No, that’s not my choice to make. I can’t take those memoires, even if was all I ever wanted. They are Tony’s- and Strange’s. It would be selfish. I made these memories because of the path I walked in life. That path came from my heart. Every choice I ever made led me to these people and it would be wrong to walk away just because things got complicated. I love being Spider-Man, I love Tony and Strange, and I’m not ever giving that up. So, please. Just give me my memories back.”

He could feel the happiness in the room.

“Was that a test?”

And, with what he thought must be a smirk, the next thing Peter heard in this weird place was “Of course.”

“And I passed just like that? Forgive for being anxious, but that doesn’t seem… right? Is there a clause that I should know of,” Peter asks, worried that he’ll go back and something else could go wrong and that he’ll be stuck in this loop of ups and downs for the rest of his life.

“It wasn’t just you that passed our test, Peter.”

“No…? Then who else are you talking about?”

“We’ve been watching Tony. The way he cares for you is so deep in his heart that even we can feel it. Peter, I don’t know if you’ve been told before, but soulmates are real. And the way you two connect, it’s an absolute point. In every universe, a Peter Parker will eventually meet Tony Stark. And with our power, we could take that away- but we won’t.”

“Thank you,” Peter whispers.

He feels a gust and the presence of the stones are gone, and it’s just him. He closes his eyes, takes a breath, and then he was awake in Tony’s arms.

Tony

“Fuck sake! Strange, wake the hell up!” he shouts, shaking the man by the shoulders. It seems to work, as Strange blinks once and then is looking down in horror at Peter.

“This wasn’t supposed to happen,” he says, looking away from Tony. Apparently too embarrassed to face him and help- to admit that he did one of those stupid spells wrong and that his kid might die because of his recklessness. “I- I should be there.”

“Your spell didn’t work- your stupid spell that I didn’t even want to go along with didn’t even-“

“My spell worked.”

“Well, hey, smart guy- I don’t see a living and breathing Peter Parker telling me every little memory of our life in the other timeline. Do you? So, uh, don’t think it did work then- buddy. Someone’s weirdly sure of himself twenty-four seven and now he can’t even admit that he fucked up,” he rants. He resits the urge to get on a suit and go toe-to-toe with the pretentious asshole in front of him who still hasn’t moved one inch. “So, just get the hell out of my way-“

“It worked, Tony,” Strange snaps. “It’s just- they pushed me out of it.”

“Who?” Tony asks. “Strange- what the hell is going on?”

“The spell I used directs the user and whoever else to an area that no human could ever enter- well, without magic… of course. And there- lies the spirts of the six stones. Been around for as long as their namesake and with every use they get frail- less powerful- but they still hold this cosmic energy that allows them to do anything. Like keep Peter alive. And right now, I’m guessing they’re trying to decide whether to allow Peter to get a head full of lovely memories. Or maybe they’ll decide to make it so we forget him. I don’t know, Stark.”

“Why do they get to decide?” Tony asks, scared out of his mind. “This is awful, Strange. I need a drin-“ Tony stops himself. He… doesn’t. The thought of emptying another bottle of whisky doesn’t sound appetising at all. It makes him feel sick. And he has this kid to thank for that. “Why didn’t they let you join?” he asks, partly so he ignores the discourse in his head over his drinking problems and the other because he was genuinely curious as to why they forced Strange to abandon his kid.

“Not to influence the vote? I don’t know, Tony. Funnily enough, this is the first time I’ve dealt with something like this,” Strange rolls his eyes.

“Not the first time you’ve had an attitude though,” Tony retorts, grinning to himself for the comment. “So… Peter will be back?” he asks, forgetting about their arguments as soon as Peter’s safety was back in his head. “Even if he forgets us, and we forget him- I imagine he’d still be around?. Whatever happens, he’ll come back right where we’re lying now, and I’ll just have to remember him all over again…”

“It’s either that or you get your Peter back. And, trust me, that’s all I’ve wanted.”

Deciding he’s had enough with their conversation, Tony sits by Peter and gently wraps his arms around him. Keeping Peter’s head up with his hand, he wraps the other just around the top of his waist. “I need you, Pete,” Tony whispers. “Come back, please. I need my son.”

One-hour passes.

“Hey,” Tony whispers as he sees Peter’s eyes flicker, his own heartbeat rising to a point that shouldn’t keep him alive. It’s far too fast. “I still remember you. That’s a good sign, isn’t it?” he smiles. He lifts Peter up an inch, trying to speed up the waking process as he prays really damn hard that Peter remembers him. “I really hope it’s good news, underoos. I miss you.”

“Tony,” Peter whispers.

“No Mr Stark, hm?”

“I think it’s time. We have known each for a while, haven’t we?”

Tony’s uncertain grin turns huge, and before he knows it he’s crying tears of relief. “Fuck, kid,” he curses, resting his head against the boy’s chest as Peter pushes up and hugs him. “You have no idea how much it means to me to have you here,” he whispers, holding him so tight and close that he was scared he might break him. But Peter doesn’t say anything, just lets him hug him. He must realise he needs it.

“I can’t believe I forgot you, Tony,” Peter whispers, crying himself. “I remember everything.”

“And you don’t regret it?”

“Regret what?”

“Getting these memories back? Does it not hurt to have a constant reminder of everything we went through?”

“No, because I have you,” Peter says. Quick, precise, and to the point. He likes it. “I don’t care, Tony. I don’t care if it hurts, because all of that makes me who I am to this day. I’m so glad you came looking for me.”

“Always, kid,” Tony whispers. “God, I’ll always come back for you. No matter what. You’re my son, my boy- and I- I’m not Tony without you. You saved my life.”

Tony feels the boy start to cry in his arms, his whole body moving as he grips Tony’s shirt. And for that, Strange leaves the room and gives them some time. And as soon as the door closes, they stay there in a pool of their own tears, and they just hold each other for a while. It’s been a long time coming.

Twenty minutes later, Peter

“Do you remember what they said to you in that place, Peter?” Strange asks, after giving them both some time to adjust. When he said ‘some’ time, Peter had expected a day or something. But no. He meant twenty minutes. And as soon as that time was up, he was demanding to know. He did them a favour, and he wants his return present to be cashed right now. And apparently the present he needed the most was answers. “When I left you- did they tell you anything I should know?”

“Strange, come on-“ Tony says, now stood up beside Peter. He’s got his arms crossed over his chest, his jacket a bit messed up with a wet spot on his shirt from where Peter had sobbed against him. “Give him some time, the kid’s barely come back to us and you’re already interrogating him.”

“It’s fine, Tony,” Peter interrupts. “Uh, they said that me and Tony- our friendship- it was an… absolute point? Whatever that means. Like that we’re soulmates across the universe.”

“…Fascinating,” Strange whispers. “Okay- I have to go and study this. I’m glad you’re back with us, Peter. See you again.”

Before either of them could say thanks or goodbye, a portal rises and Strange steps through it to leave them behind.

Tony turns to him, a smile on his face, and Peter suddenly forgets that Strange left them behind. He smiles back, going back into Tony’s arms for a hug. He grins when Tony’s head rests on top of his when he’s brought even closer. “I love you, kid,” he hears, Tony’s voice loud and clear. He’s no longer scared of expressing it, of telling Peter how much he cares for him, and it makes Peter feel like he’s dived headfirst into a warm bath. “And you’re never going anywhere again.”

“I’m not sure what my aunt will think of that,” Peter laughs.

“She’ll have to get used to it, kid, because you’re going nowhere.”

Peter contacted his aunt later that night to tell her that he would be staying at Ned's. 'Asked' her, to be precise. But she always said yes, so Peter wasn't worried. He did so since asking her whether he could stay at the Avengers' compound and have a sleepover with them would be the funniest joke he could ever tell her. There's no way she would believe him. Even if it was the truth. And if he told her he met Tony in an alternate reality where a giant purple space monster turned half the population to dust, she'd undoubtedly create a room for him at the hospital where she worked. Therefore, staying at 'Ned's' was the best cover story he could make.

He felt more comfortable being around Tony now that he understood what they had gone through together. The Avengers were well aware of this, after noticing the difference in Peter as they came back upstairs. Seeing the kid who was about to have a nervous breakdown in front of them transform into someone who matched Tony Stark's sass (as well as recognising that Tony had regained his smile back all of a sudden) was a shock, but a welcomed one.

That night, as Tony tucks Peter in a comfy bed without the threat of saving the world and missing memories on their shoulders, he can breathe. He sits on the side of Peter’s bed, putting a glass of water on his bedside table. He remembers that Peter had once done the same for him, every night when he’d drown in a bottle, and then, like this, realises how far they’ve both come.

“Soulmates, huh?” he says, remembering back to what Peter had told Strange earlier in the day. “Is that what they told you?”

“Mhm,” Peter nods. “Apparently every Peter Parker has their own Mr Stark.”

“Thought it was ‘Tony’ now,” Tony narrows his eyes, a smile on his lips.

“Difficult not to slip into the classic sometimes,” Peter chuckles. He smiles down at the quilt he’s tucked into, and then back at Tony. “I know now that I missed you. Can’t believe I forgot, really.”

“It’s not your fault, magic sucks.”

“Well…”

“If you’re about to tell me that Strange’s little spells are cooler than my suits then I’ll tell him to take your memories again.”

“You wouldn’t dare!”

“No, I wouldn’t,” Tony laughs. “Well, kid, I should let you sleep. It’s been a long one. Remember- Morgan and Pepper are coming down tomorrow and I want you to be right there with me to meet them.”

“Of course, Tony. Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

“Night, kiddo. Sleep tight, alright? If you need anything, I’m right next door,” he says. Dropping a kiss to the top of Peter’s head, he gets off the bed and walks over to the light switch which he dims down to keep the tiniest bit of light. Peter has never liked to sleep in a complete darkness. “Love you,” he says, before closing the door and stepping outside.

And now that Peter has his memories back, he can finally relax and take a breath. They did it, they really did save the world and now he can finally enjoy it.