What does it mean to be okay?
Robin doesn’t know how long they sit in her office, Melina curled up against her. She’d finished her reports long ago and now just settled on holding Melina close. Melina was gently dragging her fingers along Robin’s bare stomach from where she had snuck her fingers under the hem of her shirt.
It’s quiet and peaceful for the first time in a while. It’s clear to Robin that Melina hadn’t been looking after herself while Alejandro was there, too engrossed in ensuring that their daughters were safe. Melina’s exhausted and bruised.
Robin gently runs her fingers through Melina’s hair, trailing soft kisses up and down her jaw and temple. They’re content to just be for the moment. Melina needs to be held and looked after as much as Robin needs to hold and care for her.
Melina falls asleep pressed against Robin, her face tucked against the crook of her neck. Robin glances at the clock on the wall, slowly watching the time pass by. She knows that they can’t stay in her office chair forever and that Natasha was probably going to come crawling into their bed sooner or later, but at the same time she worries about waking Melina up.
Eventually, there is a knock on her office door. “Mama?” Natasha’s sleepy voice calls out and Robin nudges Melina to wake up and redress. Melina tugs her clothes back on at Robin unlocks the door.
Natasha wraps her arms around Robin as soon as she sees her. “I thought you left.” She murmurs. “You and mommy weren’t in bed.”
“I’m right here,” Robin considers settling Natasha back in bed but ultimately decides against it when she feels the warm tears dampen her shirt. “It was only a dream, sweetheart.”
“No…” Natasha shakes her head. “It was a memory.” She murmurs before pausing. “Can you pick me up?” She shyly mumbled into Robin’s shirt.
Robin braces her left side and stoops down to scoop Natasha up with her right. She feels Melina’s hand reach out to steady her when she stumbled for a moment. Natasha rests her cheek against her shoulder, her hand moving to slide her fingers into Robin’s hair like Yelena did.
“My baby,” Robin murmurs affectionately, kissing the side of Natasha’s head. She manages the short walk down the hallway into the master bedroom. Natasha tightens her grip when Robin moves to set her down on the bed. “I need to change into pajamas, sweetheart.”
Natasha reluctantly lets her go and Robin finds her curled up in the middle of the bed when she exits the bathroom. Melina moves to get changed next as Robin settles down in bed.
Robin falls asleep just like she did the previous night. This time she wakes up because she senses someone small standing next to the bed. For a moment, she thinks it’s Natasha until she feels the small body beside her shift in her sleep.
“Mama?”
Robin’s eyes fly open and she’s left staring into the face of Yelena. “Hi, little one. How did you get out of bed?” She slowly shifts away from Melina and Natasha so she can lift one end of the blanket up. “Come here.”
Yelena eagerly scales the side of the bed and her little elbow collides with the stitches on Robin’s side. Robin lets out a pained grunt as Yelena settles on top of her.
“Comfy?” Robin retorts with a pained wheeze and Yelena lets out a small hum. “We need to get you a big girl bed if you’re starting to make escapes.”
“Wanted to come see you, mama,” Yelena informed her softly and Robin softens at the words.
“I missed you, my baby,” Robin taps Yelena’s nose and Yelena lets out a small giggle. “Were you a good girl for mommy?”
“Mama’s friend wasn’t nice,” Yelena informs Robin, squishing her cheek against Robin’s collar.
Robin cringes at Alejandro being referred to as her friend. “Yeah? Why’s that?”
“He hit the door at night and yelled really loudly. Nattie had the knife she got for her birthday,” Yelena informs Robin, her fingers playing with Robin’s hair as she lets out a small yawn. “We played hide and seek in the closet.”
“Mama’s… friend… isn’t coming back,” Robin informs Yelena firmly, stroking the soft curls on the top of her head. “Mama doesn’t plan on leaving again.”
“I missed you, mama,” Yelena smiled up at Robin. Robin smooths the blanket over them.
Robin can’t help but smile back down at her. “I missed you so much, little one. I love you.”
Yelena gently tugs on Robin’s hair sleepily. “I love you more.” She informs Robin and the tall woman chuckles.
“Settle down and try to go back to sleep,” Robin rubs Yelena’s back, feeling Natasha shift from her spot between her and Melina.
It doesn’t take long for Yelena to fall asleep.
Robin is left with more questions than answers from her conversation with Yelena. She needs to sit down with Natasha and ask about Alejandro and walk through everything that happened. She should do that with all of them.
However, that is an issue for the morning. Robin glances at her little family all safe and sound before she closed her eyes again.
She dreams of the General and wakes up to a pressure on her chest. She almost shoves Yelena off of her before she realizes that nobody is holding her down and that it’s only her daughter. As carefully as she can, Robin shifts Yelena off of her chest and next to Natasha, standing and heading into the bathroom.
Her hands are shaking and Robin grips the sink, trying to control her breathing. “I’m going to kill him.” She mumbles to herself, tilting her head up to look at herself in the mirror. “I’m going to kill him.”
She repeats it over and over. Everything will be worth it in the end. She will kill him and she will take her family and she will run.
“I’m going to kill him--” Robin whispers.
“Kill who?” Melina’s voice pipes up from the doorway and Robin jumps, the stiches in her side pulling uncomfortably and she lets out a grunt of pain. Melina enters the bathroom, sliding up behind her. “You okay?”
Robin takes a moment to settle her racing heart before replying. “I just had a bad dream.” She replies. It’s the truth. Melina wraps her arms around Robin from behind, her hands gently running along her abs as she rests her chin onto Robin’s arm. “Did I wake you?”
“Yes,” Melina doesn’t lie, pressing a kiss to Robin’s shoulder. “Are you okay?” She repeats her question.
“I will be,” Robin turns in Melina’s hold so that she’s facing her. “Are you?”
Melina leans forward to rest her forehead against Robin’s chest. “I will be.” She echoes the answer.
Robin kissed the top of her head, wrapping her arms around her to hold her for a few moments. “I… I’m going to kill him one day…” Robin whispers and when she senses the unasked question, she elaborates. “The General.”
Melina stiffens in her hold and Robin cups the back of her head.
“One day.” She repeats quietly and the topic is dropped, both too afraid to make any plans or ask any questions.
They move back to bed and Robin notices that Natasha had a protective arm thrown over Yelena’s small body. Their relationship had obviously changed while Robin was gone.
Robin slides back into bed and tries to catch some more sleep. She drapes an arm over her three girls and clings to the reassurance that they’re safe and sound.
Robin spends the whole day in her office talking to them individually. She starts with Yelena, the young girl excited about being allowed in her mama’s office that was usually off-limits.
Robin first checks to see how much Yelena had grown and how much weight she had gained since first coming into her care.
Yelena had grown nearly four inches in the eight or so months she’d been under Robin’s guidance and gained a good amount of weight. She was no longer considered underweight for her age and height.
Robin then pulls out her markers and some spare papers before sitting in her office chair and pulling Yelena into her lap. She starts to ask Yelena about what happened while she was gone. Yelena’s memory isn’t very good but when Robin starts to ask specific questions then she starts to gain more of the story.
Yelena colors as she answers questions and Robin watches carefully for any signs of distress. Yelena seems oblivious to what had happened. She knew Robin was hurt and had to go away to get better. She knew that Alejandro was sent to look after them instead of Robin. She knew that she suddenly had a lot of sleepovers and stayed with Maxine and Joel at night for a while. She knew that ‘Aunt’ Rosalie looked after her instead of Robin.
Robin hadn’t known about Maxine and Joel nor had she known that Rosalie looked after Yelena and apparently became her honorary aunt.
The first time Yelena started to show signs of being uncomfortable was when Robin asked her about Alejandro pounding on the door at night. Robin drops the subject and cuddles her close, praising her for being such a good girl. Yelena finishes her drawing and is then dismissed to go play.
Natasha shows up next and Robin checks her height and weight as well. Natasha had only grown barely two inches and didn’t gain enough weight to stop her from being considered underweight. She wasn’t an adventurous eater like Yelena was and preferred to stick to things she could easily identify. Stews, casseroles, and soups were often picked at unless she had seen it cooked herself.
Natasha settles on Robin’s lap much like Yelena did but she didn’t color. She knew what Robin wanted to talk about and wouldn’t pretend to be naive about it.
It takes a little more persistence and prompting with Natasha to get her to open up. Robin has to find ask specific questions to coax more information out of her.
Natasha admits that sleeping over at someone’s house was a new experience. She was terrified to sleep on the floor of Elliot’s room and instead she stayed awake to watch over Yelena and fell asleep in class at school instead. She didn’t sleep at night with Alejandro there either, staying awake so she could sit with her back against the door and her pocket knife gripped in her hands.
Robin takes a longer time to hold Natasha and shower her with praises. She’s so incredibly proud of her for being so strong and looking after her little sister. She’s sorry that she wasn’t there but she’s glad that Natasha helped out.
By the time it’s Melina’s turn, the woman was clearly nervous. Robin does the same thing that she did with Natasha and Yelena. Trying to pull information about the week was like trying to pull teeth with Melina. She doesn’t want to give any information unless Robin specifically asked for it.
Robin’s not upset with her about it and tries to be patient.
Melina finally tells Robin about Alejandro’s wandering hands and his penchant to get angry over any slightest thing that Melina did wrong. She tells Robin about Rosalie and her role in everything.
Just like with Natasha and Yelena, Robin holds Melina close and praises her for being such a good mother. Unlike Natasha and Yelena, Melina cries.
Robin just holds her while she cries, knowing that she probably needed a good cry for a long while now. She adds Alejandro to the list of people that have fucked her over, right under Belka’s name.
Melina acts like nothing happened when she finally pulls herself together and collects herself. It’s just how she operates. She leaves Robin’s office and goes to cook like she always did.
Robin starts to clean up her office when she finally looks down at what Yelena had drawn.
Yelena’s childish scrawl had left behind a family portrait in hues of bright blue and green pens. Robin bends down to tuck it safely away when there’s a sharp pain in her side so intense that it leaves her breathless and her knees weak.
She pulls her shirt up and peels the bandage away from her side to look at the stitches in her side.
Her skin was angry and red as the beginning of an infection sets in. Robin grimaces, cleaning the wound up and rebandaging it. She was supposed to be taking it easy but there was just so much to do.
Robin replaces the files in their correct places before leaving her office to head downstairs, ignoring the throbbing in her left side.
She’d be fine. She has to be. She can’t afford to let a silly wound slow her down.