tests
Yelena knows that Clint and Bobbi are whispering about them behind her back. About the use of her handcuffs and what to do about it. She tries not to pay them any mind, even when her instincts scream at her to listen.
There’s a tiny spot in the back of her mind that whispers that they’re planning to hurt her. She tries to ignore it.
It takes four more long days before Natalia’s deprogramming finishes. Maria gives them the day off and the girls don’t leave their bunk for the whole day, trying to catch up on sleep.
Yelena fastens her handcuff just a little tighter as punishment, trying to tether her thoughts to the bed with her.
Clint brings them food and the sisters don’t even bother to undo the cuffs on their wrists as he enters end dumps the trays onto their nightstand. “Eat.” He tells them but never scolds them when he switches out the cold food with a fresh tray later on.
The pair are just so exhausted. Natalia holds Yelena close, even when they sleep, wrapping around her like a human shield. Yelena likes how protected she feels. She feels safe in her big sister’s arms.
Bobbi’s the one that shows up with dinner. She sets the tray onto their nightstand. “Come on. Sit up.”
“Fuck off,” Natalia murmurs to Bobbi.
“After you girls eat,” Bobbi retorts and Yelena peers up at the Russian. “Come on. Coulson made the kitchen make cheesy bread just for you, Yelena. You haven’t eaten since last night.”
Yelena lets out a heavy sigh, not wanting to leave the warmth of her sister’s hold, lingering in the post-sleep state she only gets after staying up for days.
“Come on, kiddo,” Bobbi says in a sing-song voice. “Up.”
Yelena sits up, aware of the way Bobbi’s eyes flicker to peer at their handcuffed wrists. “Did Clint let you in?”
“He figured you’d listen better to me,” Bobbi shrugs, folding her arms and leaning against the wall. “I’m not leaving until you eat.”
Yelena undoes her cuffs, undoing Natalia’s as well, and feels Natalia shift to press her face into Yelena’s side sleepily.
Yelena peers up at Bobbi, quickly raking her eyes over her figure to assess her body language. “Have you thought of any ideas?” She asked quietly before tearing a piece of cheesy bread off and holding it down to Natalia. “First piece.”
Natalia lets out a sleepy sigh, reaching up to take the piece and shove it into her mouth. She wouldn’t go back to sleep, not with Bobbi there, but it didn’t mean she wasn’t running on empty.
“No ideas yet. If Clint or I think of anything then you’ll be the first to know,” Bobbi said, pushing herself off the wall. “I want at least half of that tray gone by the time I get back.”
Yelena knows it’s not a threat and it’s not an order but her back still stiffens, causing Natalia to tighten her grip around her. “Or what?”
The grin on Bobbi’s face falls slightly. “Or you’ll have to live with the fact I’ll be mildly disappointed that you’re not giving your bodies the nutrients it needs.” She shrugs slightly.
Yelena stuffs a piece of cheesy bread into her mouth. “Will you go now?” She doesn’t mean to sound rude but Natalia’s exhausted and she won’t sleep around Bobbi.
“Yeah,” Bobbi reaches out to ruffle Yelena’s hair quickly. “Eat up.” She said before leaving the room.
Yelena wrinkles her nose, running a hand through her hair to smooth it back down before cramming the rest of the piece of cheesy bread into her mouth, tearing off a bit from the second piece and holding it down to Natalia. “Eat.”
Natalia lets out a long sigh, too tired to argue as she takes the piece and pushes it between her lips.
Yelena passes the sealed water bottle down to Natalia first. Natalia takes a sip, passing it back.
Yelena drinks half of it before pushing the bottle back at Natalia. Natalia obediently drains the rest of the bottle, passing the empty bottle to Yelena.
Yelena shuffles to lay back down once the tray is mostly empty, frowning slightly when Natalia curls into her instead of the other way around. Yelena doesn’t mention it, wrapping her arm around Natalia as she did with her.
They’re given two days to rest before they’re passed over for psychological assessments. They’re separated this time, placed in rooms next to each other as they’re tested. They do let Bobbi stand in the room with Yelena provided that she’s quiet and lets the doctor work.
Yelena doesn’t understand many of the tests they give. She takes much longer than Natalia, mainly because reading English isn’t a strong suit so when they give her a written booklet to fill out, she stares down at it and tries to translate words in her head. When she stares at a sentence for a little too long, trying to figure out what it said, Bobbi finally spoke up.
“She needs a translator,” Bobbi’s voice disturbs the silence of the room.
“If she wants one, she can ask for one. I do believe I said you’d be gone if you interrupted us,” The doctor points Bobbi toward the door.
Yelena doesn’t ask for one. It’s admitting a weakness that she shouldn’t have. Although, if Natalia or Bobbi were there to translate, she wouldn’t have minded.
The booklet asks Yelena what she’d do in certain situations, many of them deal with people needing assistance or comfort. She writes her answers out in Russian because she was never told she couldn’t. When the booklet is filled out, she’s made to look at blotchy pictures of ink and describe what she sees. Yelena struggles with that one, trying to figure out what the right answer is.
Then they pull pictures of people’s faces and she’s asked to describe the emotion displayed. She’s asked to identify connections between people. Are these people a couple or siblings? Are they happy or sad? Why?
When the whole thing is done with, she’s meant to sit alone in the room while her answers are processed. By the time the doctor returns, Maria is trailing right behind him.
“Right,” The doctor takes a seat in front of Yelena before setting down some papers on the desk. “This is where you are developmentally compared to your peers.” They click their pen and taps the single dot on the line graph. “You’re here cognitively. About on par with your peers, if not a little more advanced.”
They move their pen to another chart. “Emotionally,” They tap their pen against the dot again. “You’re very behind. I’d say you function emotionally at the age of a six to ten year old.”
A bubble of nausea forms in Yelena’s stomach as she stares down at her test results. She wants to open her mouth and tell them they’re wrong. They have to be. The Red Room made Yelena to be perfect.
These test scores are not perfect.
“Are you sure?” Maria spoke up instead of Yelena and the doctor glances at Maria.
“I’m very confident in my assessment, Deputy Director. Unless you wish for a second opinion,” They don’t look Maria in the eyes but they don’t bow their head submissively either.
“No. Thank you, doctor. You’re dismissed,” Maria spoke and the doctor ducked out of the room. “How do you think it went?”
Yelena doesn’t realize Maria was speaking to her until there’s a hand set in front of the results on the desk, breaking her line of sight.
“Yelena?” Maria prompts and Yelena tears her eyes away from the results to look up at Maria. Maria doesn’t look upset with the results. “How do you feel about how the testing went?”
Yelena doesn’t know the right answer. Why can’t she find the right answers to these questions? If they tell her what to say, she’ll say it. “I don’t know.” Is finally whispered from between her lips, the admission painful and lingers in the air.
Maria knits her brow, staring down at Yelena for a few moments. “Shall we go see your sister?”
“Is she done?” Yelena asked and Maria nodded.
“She’s been finished for a while now,” Maria admits and Yelena frowns slightly but nods nevertheless.
“Can I have these?” Yelena questioned, tapping her finger against the sheets displaying her results on the table.
“I suppose, yes,” Maria inclines her head and Yelena collects the papers up into her arms, standing and moving to Maria’s side.
Natalia had been waiting with Bobbi, moving toward Yelena when she sees her. “Bobbi said you were struggling, are you okay?”
Physically, Yelena’s fine. Otherwise, she’s not sure. Bad test results meant punishment. She holds out the papers in her hands and Natalia reaches out to take them, looking down at them.
Natalia pushes a carefully folded piece of paper toward Yelena and the teenager unfolds it to find Natalia’s test results.
Natalia’s results were like Yelena’s. Advanced cognitively but stunted emotionally. Natalia wasn’t quite as far behind emotionally as Yelena was though, only a few years.
“Did they punish you?” Yelena asked Natalia in Arabic, unsure if Bobbi spoke that as well. “For bad results?”
“No. But they’re going to send us to therapy to bring us to where we’re supposed to be,” Natalia replies, folding Yelena’s results carefully like she did with her own.
Yelena tenses up at the thought of therapy. Therapy was bad and very much a punishment. “Oh.” She refolds Natalia’s papers. “Okay.” She holds the page back out to Natalia. She had a headache from all the reading and translating she did and wanted to lay down.
“One more thing before you’re dismissed for the day,” Maria pipes up when she sees them stop talking. “Yelena, because of your age, our psychologist is iffy about treating you and wants us to bring in a specialist mandated in child psychology.”
Yelena shakes her head. “I’m almost eighteen.” She protests quietly. She wasn’t a child.
“I’m telling you this because they’ve agreed to take you on for now but make no promises about keeping you on as a patient,” Maria warns and Yelena swallows the bitter disappointment.
“That’s okay.” Yelena tells Maria. “I’m used to people not wanting me.”
Maria opens her mouth but then pauses and closed it, shaking her head. “Dismissed.”
Natalia takes Yelena back to their bunk and Yelena curls up on their bed. Natalia lays right behind her, her hand coming up to brush her fingers through Yelena’s hair. “Are you okay?”
Yelena takes a few moments to answer, knowing her sister could pick apart her lies. “I dunno.” She finally whispers, feeling her sister nuzzle her nose against the nape of her neck.
“I adore you, Yelena,” Natalia said, pulling Yelena closer. “I’m here. I want you.”
Yelena swallows hard, closing her eyes to keep the tears threatening to well up at bay.