i won't let go of your hand

Marvel Cinematic Universe The Avengers (Marvel Movies) Black Widow (Movie 2021) Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
G
i won't let go of your hand
author
Summary
Yelena Belova was seventeen when her sister broke her out of the Red Room. She was seventeen when her sister brings home the man sent to kill her. She was seventeen when she became the youngest SHIELD agent known to date. (used to be "i was held in chains, but now i'm free")>>Now with German translation!<<
Note
Natasha is 22Yelena is 17Words in italics is RussianThank you so much to Jeylee for the German translation! Find it here:German Translation
All Chapters Forward

bitemark

May is called into the field for the first time since taking Yelena on as her rookie. 

 

Yelena, of course, is not invited to go with her. In fact, she doesn’t even know that May is gone until Coulson tells her that May can’t attend training and she’ll have another female agent to train her.

 

The woman obviously didn’t expect Yelena to be as young as she was. She raised an eyebrow down at Yelena. “You’re short.” 

 

Yelena scrunched her nose up. “And you’re tall.” She states. “Are we naming obvious things?” 

 

The woman glances around the small training room, her eyes scanning over the whiteboards on the wall. “What is this?” 

 

“Rules,” Yelena replies. “What’s your name?” 

 

“Bobbi. What’s your name?” The woman, Bobbi, shoots back.

 

“Yelena. I thought Bobbi was a boy’s name,” Yelena tilts her head to the side as she inspects Bobbi.

 

“It’s usually short for Robert but in my case, it’s short for Barbara,” Bobbi scrunches her face up in disgust briefly before shaking her head. “Some of your rules concern me.” 

 

“They’re my rules. May let me have them,” Yelena watches her. “Are we going to train?”

 

Bobbi lets out a hum before turning toward Yelena. “Let’s spar.”

 

“May likes to start with Tai Chi,” Yelena said.

 

“Yeah, well, I’m not May,” Bobbi shakes her head. “Come on. Into position. I want to see what you can do.”

 

“Do you have rules?” Yelena asked, removing the sneakers she wore before stepping onto the mat. 

 

“Nope,” Bobbi shakes her head, waiting before striking first. 

 

Bobbi had a reckless and brute way of fighting which was very different from the quick and quiet way that May fought. 

 

Yelena was gaining the upper hand until Bobbi clamped a hand down onto the back of her neck and squeezed. 

 

The fight leaves Yelena and she’s pinned to the mat a moment later. 

 

Yelena stares up at Bobbi in surprise. She had watched Bobbi read the rules only moments earlier and the first rule was that Yelena couldn’t have the back of her neck grabbed. 

 

“You… you broke a rule,” Yelena said quietly. 

 

“I exploited a weakness,” Bobbi corrects and offers Yelena a hand up. 

 

Yelena ignores the hand and climbs back to her feet. They started a new round and Yelena constantly had to protect her neck which left her open and vulnerable to a lot of hits. 

 

Bobbi would strike and grab the back of Yelena’s neck, effectively bringing her down in a matter of a second. 

 

Yelena doesn’t handle having her boundary violated over and over again well. She finally lashes out and bites Bobbi because she forgot that they were only sparring. Because for a moment she forgot where she was.

 

Yelena bolts a moment later as Bobbi yelled at her. Yelena’s feet take her right to Maria’s office. 

 

Yelena wasn’t a snitch but she hoped that she could at least ask Maria for someone else instead. 

 

Yelena knocks briskly on the door and waits for Maria’s voice to call her in. 

 

Maria frowns when she sees Yelena and looks her over. “You’re not wearing shoes. That’s a violation of dress code.”

 

Yelena blinks in surprise, looking down at her feet before looking back up at Maria. “I want a different instructor.” 

 

Maria raised an eyebrow. “What’s wrong with agent Morse?” 

 

“When’s May coming back?” Yelena asked instead.

 

“Four days,” Maria replies before repeating her question. “What’s wrong with Agent Morse?” 

 

Yelena shrugs.

 

“I can’t reassign you unless there is a genuine issue,” Maria leans forward. “What happened, Rookie Agent Belova?” 

 

“I just don’t like it when she breaks my rules!” Yelena snaps before curling in on herself. 

 

“Breaking your rules?” Maria raised an eyebrow but a seriousness settles over her face. “What rules are you talking about?” 

 

“The ones May made me write down. The ones that make me feel safe,” Yelena wraps her arms around herself. “I know they’re weaknesses.But I like them.” 

 

“What exactly did Agent Morse do?” Maria asked her. 

 

Yelena reaches up to cup the sore skin on the back of her neck. “She keeps… she keeps grabbing the back of my neck…” 

 

Maria had seen Clint actively avoid touching the back of Yelena’s neck whenever he throws an arm around the teenager. “I see. Where is Agent Morse?” 

 

Shame flushed through Yelena’s face. “Maybe medical?” She suggested quietly. “I… bit her…”

 

“You… bit her?” Maria repeats and Yelena glances away from her. “Why would you bite her?” 

 

Yelena clenches her jaw and focuses on the black socks on her feet. 

 

“Rookie Agent Belova, why would you bite your superior?” Maria asked more firmly. 

 

“I forgot where I was for a second.” Yelena finally grits out. “I thought she was somebody else.” 

 

Maria’s expression darkens and it has Yelena tensing up. 

 

“I’m going to ask you to either confirm or deny the following statement,” Maria said before continuing. “Agent Barbara Morse ignored the rules you and Agent Melinda May set up to make you feel safe. Agent Morse continually used a trigger against you until you felt the need to fight back because you had a flashback. Is that true?” 

 

Yelena pauses before letting out a slow nod. It’s not snitching. “Yes ma’am.” 

 

Maria pushed her chair back so she can stand. “I see. Follow me.” 

 

Yelena follows as Maria strides down the hallway, nearly sprinting in her haste to keep up with the taller woman. 

 

Bobbi was still in the training room and jumps at the appearance of Maria. 

 

“Agent Morse!” Maria raised her voice and Bobbi jumps to her feet. “What the fuck were you thinking?” 

 

“Ma’am?” Bobbi frowns. “She bit me.” 

 

“I want to know why you think that it is alright to use triggers against a traumatized child soldier?” Maria snaps and Yelena wrinkles her nose at the term. 

 

“Child soldier?” Bobbi’s eyes flicker to look at Yelena and something clicks in her head. “Oh fuck--”

 

“Did you care to think why there were rules posted on the wall?” Maria slams a hand against the wall next to the whiteboards. “Do you know what these are? These are a list of triggers to avoid while training. Did you stop to think why ‘no working out until vomiting’ is a rule? Didn’t it strike you as funny that it had to be explicitly put down?” 

 

Bobbi hangs her head in defeat. “No ma’am. I didn’t think.”

 

“Exactly!” Maria moves toward Bobbi and Yelena tenses up, fully expecting Maria to backhand Bobbi so hard that she hits the ground. “The only reason I haven’t thrown every punishment I can at you is that nobody bothered to debrief you on who you were training.”

 

“I apologize,” Bobbi said, standing stiffly. “I thought it was just another rookie. I didn’t know it was Black Widow’s kid.”

 

“Sister. Not kid.” Yelena interrupts and Bobbi glances at her. 

 

“Fuck…” She sighs. “I’m sorry.” 

 

Bobbi did genuinely look regretful of her actions. Yelena reaches up to rub the back of her neck and glances at the whiteboards. 

 

 

  • No grabbing or squeezing of the back of the neck

 

 

“Rookie Agent Belova, would you still like a new instructor to be assigned to you?” Maria twists on her heel to look at Yelena. 

 

“No.” Yelena just needed help telling Bobbi to knock it off. So she went to Maria because she trusted Maria enough to not punish her for expressing the fact she needed help.

 

Maria nods her head. “If there is another issue then you come find me.” Maria tells Yelena before looking at Bobbi. “If I hear another complain then I’m shipping you to base in the artic for a whole month.” 

 

“Yes ma’am,” Bobbi nods her head, and Maria glances between them before leaving as quickly as she came. 

 

Bobbi apologizes to Yelena again and Yelena begrudgingly forgives her. 

 

Bobbi teaches Yelena her weapon of choice, electric batons. Yelena finds it fascinating because she’d never seen the weapon being welded in the way that Bobbi did. 

 

May returns from her mission halfway through Yelena and Bobbi’s session. 

 

“Barbara.” May greets Bobbi and the woman freezes. “I heard something very interesting from Maria.” 

 

Bobbi’s eyes grow wide. “It was just a big misunderstanding! We’re good now, right kid?” She glances at Yelena. 

 

Yelena watches Bobbi shift like a guilty child as she’s pinned under May’s stare. “She apologized. We’re good.” 

 

“You and me. Mats. One hour.” May tells Bobbi firmly.

 

“But you just got back,” Bobbi quickly protests. “You must be tired and cranky.” 

 

May raised an eyebrow and Bobbi quickly backtracks. 

 

“I mean-- not that you’re grumpy, just--” She glances at Yelena. “Kid, help me out here!” 

 

Yelena looks up at May. “Please don’t hurt her.” She doesn’t want Bobbi to get hurt. An angry May is not one that Yelena wants to get on the mats with. 

 

May’s face softens at Yelena’s request. “We’re just gonna spar. What she did was unacceptable.” 

 

“She didn’t mean to…” Yelena feels weird about having people stick up for her. Having people defend her right to draw and stick to boundaries. 

 

“I’m not gonna kill her or maim her. It’s just a spar,” May soothes. “You two finish up. I’m gonna get changed.” 

 

Yelena glances up at Bobbi when May leaves. “Is she gonna hurt you?”

 

“She’s probably gonna kick my ass,” Bobbi nods her head, pausing when Yelena looked slightly worried. “It’ll be fine.” 

 

“I don’t want her to kick your ass,” Yelena tells her, running her thumb over the baton in her grip. 

 

“I need my ass kicked sometimes,” Bobbi shrugs. “May does it because she cares. I’m pretty sure that if you did what I did then she’d kick your ass too.”

 

Yelena watches Bobbi. “You’re not upset that she’s going to hurt you?” 

 

“Oh please, once Melinda is done wiping the floor with me then she’s gonna smack me on the back of the head, and then she’s gonna pat my back, get me ice for my bruises, and make me tea,” Bobbi tells her. 

 

Yelena nods slowly. “Can I watch?”

 

Yelena ends up sitting just on the outskirts of the mat an hour later as May keeps knocking Bobbi to the ground and lectures her on respecting boundaries and triggers. Sure enough, May smacks Bobbi on the back of the head when they finished, complimented her on her form, and then went to make an icepack and tea.

 

Bobbi spots her watching and winks at her and Yelena understands both Bobbi and May just a little better. 

Forward
Sign in to leave a review.