It’s actually Venom that suggests it, once Eddie gets over the whole this is an alternate fucking universe!? What the hell, man? (You asked Eddie) shock of it all.
And it’s probably a good thing he did because turns out, the Eddie Brock of this world died a few years back in a highly suspicious motorbiking accident that may or may not have been caused by one Carlton Drake. According to the intrepid investigators of reddit and a few choice YouTubers at least. Drake himself still went up in flames when his rocket burnt up on re-entry, so there’s that at least.
He checks in on everyone else too. And by everyone, he means Anne, who seems to still be a kickass defence attorney who lives in San Francisco with one grumpy cat and one annoyingly perfect doctor-fiancé.
Is it depressing to come to terms with what an unloved loser you truly are? Venom asks but it’s coming from a place of love.
“I’m not that unloved,” Eddie grumbles and to prove a point he looks up absolutely everyone else he can think of.
I always thought Mrs Chen was more my friend than yours.
I knew her first.
That does not mean anything. Besides, I have been INSIDE Mrs Chen. So I really feel I know her best.
Okay, that’s not something I ever needed to imagine.
PRUDE.
Eddie shakes it off and gets back to his laptop. And by his he means the laptop he found unattended on a lounger and escaped with. He types out one more name, blames it on Venom pressuring him.
I am not pressuring you. I would just like you to evaluate your lack of personal connections and the possible reasons for that. And do NOT say it is me. It was a pre-existing condition. And I also do not think that man counts as a friend even if he tasted delicious. Now can we please go and find spider-thing, it is very important.
-
When all is said and done Stephen Strange, by Eddie’s assessment a colossal douchebag and very irresponsible wizard, tilts his head. “I could try and send you back.”
“Yeah, I saw what your last attempt at magic looked like and uh, just spend a while cleaning up after you so um, no thank you, Mr Wizard.”
The corner of Strange’s mouth twitches. “Sorcerer,” he corrects. “And I’m usually more competent in my casting because I don’t have any annoying interruptions.” He looks meaningfully over Eddie’s shoulder at that to where Peter Parker is hovering awkwardly.
Eddie frowns. Parker’s a sweet kid. The kind of hardworking, earnest, kind-hearted that Eddie always assumed only existed on tv. He’s also definitely, you know, a kid. “Sorry, weren’t you the adult in that situation?”
“Couldn’t agree more,” a surly Chinese gentleman Eddie’s not been formally introduced to but feels thoroughly judged by, interjects.
He’s sounding more and more like a VILLAIN, Venom also interjects. I wonder what magic tastes like.
“You’re not eating him,” Eddie says and Strange quirks an eyebrow in a manner that seems more intrigued than worried which is slightly concerning.
“I actually did interrupt some, Mr Brock,” Peter says, worrying his hands together. “I’ve seen Stephen cast before and uh, he never messed up before.”
The Chinese man sighs and shakes his head. Eddie couldn’t agree more.
What do you think?
Venom is quiet for so long that Strange starts to look impatient, then: We should stay for a while. Might be fun.
“Nah, I’m still good, thanks, Mr Wizard.”
Venom chooses this moment to appear over his shoulder. “There is one thing we could use your assistance with though. On this plane we are, unfortunately, dead. It may cause some confusion.”
“No,” says the Chinese man.
Strange rolls his eyes. “Come on, Wong. It’ll barely be a spell. Just a minor shift and Eddie Brock’s confirmed death is maybe a little less confirmed.”
Wong raises his eyes skyward. “You should never have been granted these powers.”
“So you will help us?” Venom asks.
Strange quirks his mouth in what Eddie assumes is a smile.
The spell is quick. Eddie expends all his energy on not moving a muscle – and convincing Venom to also not move a muscle - while Strange waves his hands about and makes pretty patterns in the air. Eddie’s expecting something more climactic at the end of it, or you know, anything more than Strange clapping his hands together and smirking.
“Done,” he says, looking very smug.
“So I’m alive again, just like that?”
“Just like that,” Strange agrees. “Almost like magic, Mr Brock.”
Are you certain I cannot eat his head?
And it’s honestly a struggle not to say yes.
-
As he’s leaving he makes sure to say goodbye to Wong because he’s trying this thing where he doesn’t actively piss off people who seem like they should not be pissed off and adds, “Also, I um, don’t know how all of this works and quite frankly I don’t want or need to but if you’re Strange’s boss can I recommend that you maybe fire him? He does not seem like he should have all that power.”
Wong sighs. He looks tired but still like he could kick both Eddie and Venom’s ass if he wanted to.
I disagree.
Of course you do.
“If only that were possible, Mr Brock,” Wong says, which doesn’t bode well.
He finds Parker hovering out front. He has that kind of jittery nervous energy that means Eddie’s not quite sure where to look as he shifts from foot to foot. “Hey, Mr Brock, I just wanted to say thank you, again for helping out back there. It, uh – was getting pretty messy for a bit there.” He breaks off, looks away.
Eddie tries and imagines how he would handle having superpowers at sixteen. Not well, is his conclusion.
I would have helped you make good decisions.
The whole notion is so ridiculous that Eddie laughs and Parker jumps, almost looses his footing. He tries to style it out and Eddie is polite enough to give him it. “Sorry,” Parker says. “It’s uh – so your um, friend just talks to you nonstop?”
“Yep. It’s kind of difficult to get him to stop, actually.”
You missed me when I was gone.
Parker nods. Shuffles awkwardly. “So, uh, what are you gonna do now?”
Find some villains, eat some heads.
“I’m gonna treat this as a fresh start. I’m kind of a fugitive back home so it’ll be nice to be not that for a while.”
Parker’s eyes have gone slightly wide. He looks Eddie up and down like he’s trying to assess just how much of a threat they are, or possibly could be. It’s kind of funny in a really upsetting, no-sixteen-year-old-should-have-to-do-that way.
“Do not worry, Spiderling,” Venom says, appearing from Eddie’s chest. “I will make sure he does not repeat his past mistakes.”
Right, because that was all me.
“Okay, um, Mr – or are you a Mr? Does your species have gender? Sorry, doesn’t matter. I hope it all works out for you and let me know if there’s anything I can do to help you.”
“I like him, Eddie,” Venom says and Parker smiles slightly nervously.
-
He goes to see Anne first and Strange might have uncomplicated his situation legally but in every other conceivable way that could matter it’s still supremely awkward. To her credit, Anne handles things remarkably well.
Of course she does. She is REMARKABLE.
“And you’ve just – ” she says, hands still wrapped around a mug of coffee that’s gone long cold. She takes a deep, steadying breath and when she looks up she looks honest to god terrifying. “You’ve just been out there all this time!? You couldn’t have called? Couldn’t have texted?”
Eddie is honestly taken aback by this. Venom is supremely pleased. Practically purring.
I knew it, he says. I KNEW it.
Mr Belvedere is also purring from where he’s draped across Anne’s shoulders, glaring at Eddie and thumping his tail.
“Do you have any idea what I went through?”
Dan re-joins them at that moment, with his third mug of tea in about a half hour. He’s coping less well, got very pale when he answered the door and dropped the mug he had been holding.
People of this universe are more delicate in general, wouldn’t you agree?
Eddie assumes it has something to do with ‘the bloop’ – blip? – which sounded traumatic and messy and the kind of thing Eddie’s glad he missed.
“She really was very upset,” Dan says solemnly, one of his hands on Anne’s knee. Eddie has no idea precisely how much interaction this universe’s Eddie had with Dan before his “death” but he’s assuming they’d at least met. Dan drops his gaze. “And I – ” he starts but he trails off.
Anne lays a hand on top of his and squeezes it.
Something is different.
Eddie agrees but he also gets the idea that they could probably do with sometime to process things so he stands. “Look, I’m sorry I hurt you, Annie, I really didn’t mean it but I thought it was what was best, you know? So I’m going to leave you two to um, process because there’s someone else I need to see.”
“Are you serious right now, Eddie?” Anne hisses.
“Babe,” Dan says, aiming for soothing but sounding about as unsettled as Eddie feels.
“Yeah, there’s just a lot of anger in here right now and it’s um, really just not doing it for me so I’m gonna um,” he looks at Dan, pleadingly. Dan only briefly meets his gaze and there’s maybe a flush creeping down his neck?
Something is DEFINITELY different.
“Annie,” Dan says gently. “I think Eddie’s right, we should probably talk about it and then Eddie’ll come back tomorrow.” He looks back to Eddie, holds his gaze this time. “Right, Eddie?”
Eddie finds himself incredibly flustered. “Um, sure, yes.”
I like it!
-
Cletus Kasady laughs himself silly when Eddie is led to his cell.
This is a bad idea, Venom says for the hundredth time. You are an idiot.
We owe it to his victims, I’ve told you before. We just have to make sure everything’s the same here.
WE? Venom grumbles and hmphs. Also, you realise I am literally INSIDE YOUR HEAD right now? I can tell when you are lying so I will say again: this is a bad idea.
And okay, maybe he’s right because Eddie knows Kasady is just about as dangerous as it gets. Well, probably not here but back home, at least. And he knows Kasady’s the worst kind of monster but there was just something - something there at the end where Kasady had looked at him with genuine hurt and sorrow –
I just wanted your friendship.
Spiderthing is rubbing off on you, Eddie. You can NOT be friends with this man. In fact, you should let me eat him here before he breaks out.
“Eddie Brock,” Kasady says, half-sings like he’s genuinely elated. “Now, I was given reason to believe you were dead. Why else would you stop comin’ to see me?”
“I can think of just so many reasons,” Eddie says as he crosses the room. He glances around as he goes – the drawings are still there, scrawled in red against the dark grey. They look the same – St Estes, the tree, the coastline.
What would you know? You did not even SEE them before.
“But we’ve got unfinished business, haven’t we, Kasady?”
Kasady tilts his head. “Well don’t you seem chipper.”
Eddie drags a chair across and sits down. “How ‘bout I make you a deal, Kasady,” he says, before Kasady can start monologuing. It makes him frown, makes him look like a bratty kid. “Let’s talk about those bodies you’ve still got tucked away.”
Kasady twists his mouth. “That’s all you ever wanna talk about. It’s gettin’ a little boring.”
Eddie smiles as politely as he can muster. “Well, it is what you’re best known for and anyway, you didn’t let me finish. You tell me where the bodies are, we give their families closure and I help you tell your story whichever which way you want.”
That gets Kasady’s attention.
You know, when we watched Silence of the Lambs you said it was for it’s cinematic value. Not because you wanted to emulate it.
“Well, why didn’t you start with that?” he asks, grinning widely.
-
He calls in the location of the bodies. The Bugle cuts him a deal for the Cletus Kasady story across 5 long articles and gives him a hefty advance. Venom is annoyed but not as annoyed as Anne, apparently.
“This is exploitative garbage,” she says, skim reading part one over breakfast. “It’s Kasady’s victims you should be writing about, not his shitty childhood.”
Dan hums, reading over her shoulder. “I don’t know, babe. People do love to figure out what makes these guys into monsters.” He frowns. “You know I almost feel sorry for the guy which is definitely an odd feeling.”
Anne swats at him. “That’s the point.”
Eddie’s been crashing on their couch for the past week, it was supposed to be temporary but neither of them have asked him to leave yet.
“I agree,” Venom says (and yeah, it took some explaining but both Anne and Dan have coped with it okay.) “I believe there is a meme for this now. It goes: cool motive, still murder.”
“You know, about half of his victims worked at St Estes,” Eddie says, which is a weak excuse and only serves to make Anne glare harder. Dan winces on his behalf.
“So what? About half of them maybe deserved it?”
There’s a knock at the door. Dan excuses himself quickly to answer it. Eddie watches him go enviously.
Anne sighs. “Eddie, I get that you have history and he’s decided you’re very similar people but you’re really not and you definitely don’t owe him this.”
You have history beyond the time you helped get him caught?
“Apparently, I do here,” Eddie mumbles.
Anne frowns, “What?”
But luckily Dan chooses that moment to reappear. “Eddie, it’s for you.”
Detective Mulligan looks just as annoyed as he did back home. “Brock,” he snaps. “I don’t care how you’ve somehow managed to come back from the dead protocol still applies. Everything with Kasady is supposed to go through me first.”
Eddie’s halfway through a mumbled-rambling apology when he notices Mulligan’s hearing aid and everything sort of derails. Huh, he thinks.
Venom hmphs. I’m not sure I like where this is going.
The plan ticks away in the back of Eddie’s mind. Or the forefront, really, since he can’t really focus on whatever Mulligan’s saying anymore. Mulligan picks up on this eventually and all but growls at him before stomping off.
“Nice to see ya, detective!” Eddie shouts after him.
Back in the kitchen, Dan is politely trying to look uninterested in the fact that a detective just showed up to his door at 7.35am. Anne is less polite and very interested. “Fancy explaining, Eddie?”
Eddie hums, waves a hand. He’s already trying to talk Venom in to pulling up anything there is on this universe’s Ravenscroft. “In a minute,” he says and he’s not looking at her but he knows that dismissing Anne is never a good idea. She’s gearing up to explode, probably. Dan’s shifted closer to intervene just in case. Its nice having them both there. Feels right.
“Eddie – ” Anne starts, tone all sharp.
“Annie,” Dan says, tone all soft.
“Look,” Eddie says, turning his laptop round to the both of them. “I know you don’t like the Kasady story but how about this next one?”