Ride On

A lot had happened since The Avengers formed. And moved in together. And disbanded. And reformed. And moved in together again. And been dusted out of existence. And Time traveled. And-

Well, a lot had happened. 

The first thing that happened after the battle that Tony could remember was waking up in a hospital room with Loki at his bedside, and Steve and Bucky asleep nearby. Except Loki was dead - and this was very clearly not the same Loki. This Loki had seen things and he was wearing- normal clothes?

“What-?” Tony managed out through the pain that was crawling along his face.

“I can’t be here long.” Loki whispered, his voice ragged. “But I… Just know this: I saved your life, rewrote your ending, because the world needs Tony Stark. No, no… The multi-verse needs him. Needs you, your brain, not just Iron Man… There is a great force coming. One that even the remaining Avengers would have trouble facing.” Loki paused and looked towards Bucky and Steve, his voice fond. “In your original timeline, after your funeral, Rogers returned the stones and stayed in the past… This time, he came back. I thought Barnes would have been the tether. Turns out, it was you.”

Tony just stared, feeling like his face was on absolute fire. Then his eyes shifted to Bucky and Steve, sound asleep. They looked ragged too, Bucky just a bit better than Steve, but still destroyed. He blinked a moment, flashed of what had happened drifting on the edge of his vision. He remembered Thanos and the infinity stones - Dr. Strange mouthing one - Peter calling his name - Pepper at his side - and his eyes transfixed on Steve. Steve, who was worthy of Thor’s hammer.

No - maybe - maybe his gaze had been fixed on both of them. There was an overwhelming feeling of relief when Bucky came back. Why was that… Why did that stick out so much in his mind?

“Did I… Did I die?” Tony muttered, trying to turn his head slightly, looking down at his arm that was - well, it wasn’t pretty.

“Oh, yes. Many times.” Loki stated, nodding. “Horribly. Honestly you may have preferred I leave you dead. But, well, I couldn't do that, could I? Your recovery is going to be harsh… And I’m sorry for what’s about to happen.”

“What do you…” Tony furrowed his brows as Loki disappeared.

Nothing made sense. He should be dead, he felt it in the core of his soul that he should be dead, but he wasn’t. And Steve and Bucky were here, at his bedside. Where was-

The door slid open and Pepper was suddenly standing there, her eyes wide. “Oh my god, Tony’s awake!” She called.

Steve and Bucky’s eyes snapped open, Steve getting up a lot faster while Bucky was more subdued and groggy. Pepper was at Tony’s side in an instant, doting over him. He offered them as good of a smile as he could before his eyes rolled back and he fell back asleep.

~~~

The next three weeks moved in short bursts. Everytime Tony woke up he wasn’t really sure what day or time it was, just that time had passed. Different people were in his room every day. Cards and flowers filled the empty spaces, drawings from Morgan taped to the windows, and always at least one Avenger sitting on the couch or in the chair or, have mercy, sometimes cuddled up with Tony on the bed.

And Pepper - patient, loving, caring Pepper. She came and went, sometimes with Morgan, sometimes alone. But each time, she looked like she was more and more distant. She didn’t hold Tony’s hand or read to him softly like some people would to a nearly dead spouse. No, she would ask how he felt, give him an update on Stark Industries or the world relief effort or some boring part of world council meetings - but she never scraped past the surface.

The fourth week, Tony opened his eyes to Natasha standing at his bedside. He wanted to cry immediately. He thought she was dead - they hadn’t been able to bring her back. She was one of the few actually gone - and now she was here.

And on the other side of him - the new Loki. Again. Loki smiled down at Tony, and somehow the god of mischief looked even more exhausted than he had a few weeks before.

“You look worse than me, reindeer games.” Tony turned his eyes to Nat, furrowing his brows. “And you… How?”

“Because she’s not your Natasha.” Loki sighed, “I took her from a universe that you all died in the New York attack. But I showed her all the memories from your Natasha…”

“Up to the moment of my - well, her - death.” Natasha squeezed Tony’s hand gently. “But between the three of us, the cover story is that the snap did bring me back. And this Loki found me to bring me here.”

“Have the others seen you two?” Tony asked.

“Yes. Thor knew.” Loki dropped his gaze, his face filled with sadness. “He knew I was not the brother he lost… But all the same accepted me as I am. I am the Loki that escaped with the tesseract while you did your Time Heist. I’ve seen some issues on the timelines that… Honestly, I can’t fix what’s coming. Or warn you. But know for now… You have time, I think.”

Loki held a hand up to Tony’s chest, pressing a hand there as Tony took a gasping breath. Moments later, he felt far better than he had. The ache in his bones subsided, the pain in his back went away, and even the forming scars along the side of his face calmed. He caught the glow of green from the stone in Loki’s hand and his eyes widened. “Did you just - Did you use the time stone on me? Can you do that?”

“Technically?” Loki chuckled, “I’m not supposed to do any of this. But the original TVA was destroyed… The timelines are mixing… And it’s my fault. So if I can at least help save one of them, then I shall. I just gave you a few years of youth back, took that half the universe is gone, edge off.”

“I think this is a fever dream.” Tony announced, leaning back in the pillows further.

“I thought so too, Tony.” Natasha squeezed his hand again, and a rare emotion flashed over her face. “I almost wished everything Loki showed me wasn’t true… But it is.”

Loki shifted on his heels. “But as I said, for now you have time. Watch your daughter grow, work on your projects, and be a team again. I will be around.”

With no more answers, Loki disappeared through what looked like a doorway that closed quickly behind him. Nat looked like she needed a nap, which prompted Tony to nod towards the couch against the window. “Free space there for you.”

Nat glanced at it, then turned and crawled into the bed next to Tony, hugging against his side. “Free space here too.” She muttered.

She wasn’t usually a cuddler, not with anyone but Clint, but she seemed like she could use having a shoulder to lay on at the moment. Tony let out a soft sigh, “So… You don’t really have memories of the last few years?”

“Not my own. I got to see a lot of them. Movie nights, your wedding, fighting and disbanding… Taking control during the blip… It was a lot to take in, the memories are still flowing through. But I’m here now. Your Nat is gone and my whole team is gone - I guess it’s a perfect match.”

“Guess so.” Tony yawned, “Now you get time to catch up before the next really big bad hits.”

~~~

A lot of things happened in the next week. Tony was allowed out of bed, finally. He started physical therapy, mostly for his arm. But the rest of his body needed to be reworked too. Sometimes he could still feel the ripple running through him, the moments of all the power in the universe rushing through him before -

Tony would open his eyes and be drenched in sweat. Steve said it was PTSD. Bucky said it was okay. Pepper said nothing most days.

~~~

Steve was the one to walk in with Wanda behind him. Her eyes didn’t leave the floor for a long time while Steve explained what had happened to Vision’s body to Tony, who had no idea. After the first fight he had just assumed that the Wakandans had taken him to reclaim the resources. He really had lost touch during the blip. This time he didn’t bother calling Pepper to handle it. He picked up the phone himself and within an hour Vision was being loaded onto a Stark private jet to be brought home.

Whenever home was now.

“Can you… Bring him back?” Wanda asked, her voice barely more than a whisper.

Tony was looking at all the pictures and schematics now, chewing his lip in thought. He would have to get clearance to leave the hospital, work with his arm in a sling, and probably get nicely reacquainted with the workshop couch, but he offered her a nod anyway. “I’m Tony Stark. As long as we can salvage memories from his back up drives then we can get him functioning but… He was given life and personality through an infinity stone.”

“I can help, maybe.” Wanda held her hand up, the wisps of magic falling from her fingertips. “I… I hope I can. Please. I just need him back.”

Tony softened, reaching out to touch Wanda’s arm. “I’ll get him back to you. Just… Give me some time.”

Wanda nodded, “I can do that.”

Tony swore Steve was staring at him the whole time like he was some sort of saint.

~~~

The next day, Pepper set the packet of paperwork on Tony’s lap. They sat in silence for nearly a whole hour while Tony read over everything. When he closed the folder, they made eye contact with equally tear stained eyes.

“I can’t do it anymore, Tony.” Pepper said, her voice soft and calm as usual. “I can be your friend, I can be your business partner, and I can be the mother of our child… But I can’t be your wife. I can’t do this again. And I don’t want to be the bad guy, Tony, I really don’t but I-”

“You’re not the bad guy, I am.” Tony stated, shifting to sit up straight in the bed. “I promised you I would step back. Then I ran in. I time traveled. I took the infinity stones and I chose to snap my fingers. And the sad part? I would do it a hundred thousand more times if it meant saving the universe every single time… And I can’t put you through that. You’re not a hero, not a soldier, you’re not made to have to worry about the people you love.”

Pepper stepped closer to him, touching his arm gently. “I bought the tower back. For you, for the Avengers… The compound was absolutely destroyed after the battle, but construction has started there now too… I thought we could move back to the tower. With everyone. They’re your family.”

“You’ll move in too?” Tony asked.

“Of course. Morgan would hate to be separated, and we can have our own floor and she can go between freely. She’ll be raised by a village, a whole home filled to the brim with superheroes. Steve and Bucky are her favorites, by the way.” Pepper gave Tony a knowing look. “After your brushes with death… I highly suggest your next target be someone who can handle the battles. Maybe a good soldier or two.”

She left him with the paperwork and a kiss on his cheek before leaving again.

~~~

It wasn’t much later that same day that Bucky and Steve were back in the room again.

“Divorce papers?” Bucky asked, thumbing the folder open on the bedside table. “Damn, I’m sorry Stark.”

“It was coming eventually.” Tony noted, tapping idly on his tablet. “Pepper is an amazing woman, better than I’ll ever be, but we weren’t ever perfect together. She needs stability. Morgan does too, and I… I always run in. I’m a bit sad, but not angry. Not now. Now that the fighting’s over and the Avengers are coming back together I actually feel like I can breathe again. Like I was holding my breath, waiting.”

“No more hard feelings?” Steve asked, not looking up to meet Tony’s eyes. He was nervous, something that Tony rarely saw from him.

“Past is the past.” Tony stated, “It won't affect us anymore. We can’t let it. We all have futures ahead of us.”

“She tell you about the tower?” Bucky asked, putting his hands in his pockets. “We’ve been all working on getting it ready. Steve and I got your workshop put back together.”

“I can’t thank either of you enough. When Vision gets unloaded, call me. I’ll walk you through getting him plugged in with Friday’s help. Once hooked up, Jarvis’s system should auto boot to my machines and he can start self diagnosing.” Tony looked up when Bucky tapped his hand. “Don’t tell me I’m pushing it, I could walk out of here to-”

“No, you’re not pushing it. I think you’re being a good person, Tones.” Bucky admitted. “We’ll do what we can to help. But also encourage you to keep resting.”

Tony pouted, having had enough rest. “Speaking of rest - How’s Nat?”

“Excellent, all things considered.” Steve shrugged, “She’s confused and has some memory loss, but that’s just a few bumps. She’s still herself. She’s been helping with the tower too. She talks a lot more to us now, surprisingly. She likes to hear all the stories we all have. Trying to fill in the gaps, she says. We don’t mind. Now that everyone’s back… Reminiscing doesn’t hurt as much.”

“I’ll bet.” Tony responded, then looked up at the two soldiers before him.

And wondered why he had never faced these feelings before.

~~~

Just as fast as a lot had happened, suddenly a lot stopped happening. Tony stopped wearing his ring, stopped worrying about what had happened, stopped thinking about the destroyed compound and stopped staring at the super soldiers’ asses every time they walked out of the room.

Okay, maybe one of those was a lie.

The divorce went public the minute the papers hit the courthouse. They had a prenup, which was also Pepper’s idea surprisingly, and Tony had private lawyers to go over anything not included. Which wasn’t a lot. They didn’t fight over an ounce of money or possessions, they didn’t even fight over Morgan. Freely shared custody and they would be living in the same building anyway. And Morgan, smart as a whip Morgan who simply asked if she would still get to see them both. Who squealed with joy when she was told she would be moving into the Avengers tower. Who nearly tackled every Avenger she hugged to the ground in her excitement.

Morgan Stark, who would proudly bear the name for the rest of her life. Who would have happy parents because they got divorced, unlike Tony’s own. And a family bigger and more super than any other family in the entire universe. (Who certainly would never find out that Uncle Bucky killed her grandparents.)

Most importantly, Morgan Stark who was understanding and happy that her parents were getting a divorce. ‘Happy’ was certainly a subjective term, but she was comfortable. She was glad everyone was okay, even for such a little one she had certainly inherited her father’s mind.

So it was no shock to anyone when she stood before the reporters outside the hospital and gave them an award winning smile before politely saying, “Excuse us, we have to get Daddy home to rest in his own bed. And eat a cheeseburger.”

The shock came after the reporters started a barrage of questions about the divorce, culminating in Morgan raising her chin and announcing with all the life and vigor of a 5 year old, “Mommy and Daddy love each other too much to be married. I hope Daddy marries Uncle Steve instead!”

That was definitely one way to stop reporters dead in their tracks for a solid twenty seconds while their brains caught up with them. Luckily, by the time they did, Tony was loaded into the car with Morgan secured in a booster seat next to him and Happy and Pepper in the front.

Pepper was the first to speak up, “Morgan, honey bee, why did you say that to the reporters?” She asked with her voice portraying zero sense of surprise, only pure curiosity.

“Daddy taught me to always speak my mind.” She answered simply, then a beat passed before she continued, “And you kept telling me Daddy was safe at the hospital because Uncle Steve was with him. Or sometimes Uncle Bucky… Maybe he should marry both of them. I like them both a lot.”

“Woah woah peanut, do I get a say in this?” Tony laughed, though his heart hurt. “Steve and Bucky are dating each other. Your mother and I just got divorced. The ink is still wet on the paper!”

Morgan looked up at Tony with big eyes and a sad face, “But Mommy said you love Uncle Steve.”

“As a friend.” Tony added, then looked to the front for Pepper’s input. “As a friend, right Pepps?... Pepper?”

“Tony… we’ve been kind of kidding ourselves here since the New York invasion, haven’t we?” Pepper asked, her tone not sad or hurt, just accepting. “I saw how you changed when you had the fallout with Steve. It was… probably the only time you were entirely attentive to me. When everything happened, when the world went nuts… We tried so hard to keep it together. But I knew the thoughts in your mind. Who was really eating at you.”

Tony blinked and turned his eyes to the window, falling quiet. He had a lot to think about.

~~~

Tony Stark was a pro at hiding from his own feelings. But part of him wished he did feel something about the divorce. A bit of remorse, possibly, but nothing else. Pepper was still in his life, Morgan was still in his life, and now he had the freedom to think about whatever he wanted without the backlash of mentally cheating. Was it cheating if it was just fantasy?

But for now, all of those thoughts even were on the back burner. As soon as he got home from the hospital he spent the next two weeks, to no one’s surprise, mostly in his workshop. Steve or Sam would haul him out for physical therapy; Bucky or Rhodey would haul him out for meals. Other than that, he was left in peace. Well, Morgan was often in the workshop with him, but he considered her presence peaceful too.

“I have been running self diagnostics since they brought me here.” The voice of Jarvis, which now belonged to Vision, hummed through the speakers. “But it is like key elements of the body are simply gone. I don’t recall anything, either.”

“I’m going to start fixing your memories now.” Tony announced, very carefully fine tuning the first set of back up memory chips he had installed in Vision. He had taken every precaution when he initially built Vision. “Okay, start downloading the sequence now.”

“Downloading.” Vision’s voice responded before going into download mode.

“Oy, Tony.” Bucky spoke from the doorway, where he’d used his passcode to step inside. “Coming up for movie night?”

“We still do those?” Tony asked, checking the progress bar before he stood from his desk. “I thought the whole civil war in an airport thing kind of killed that vibe.”

“Your last name should be Snark.” Bucky responded fondly before ruffling Tony’s hair.

Tony couldn’t help but laugh, shrugging with a slight wince. “I’m serious, though, when did these start again?”

Bucky watched him for a moment as they started towards the elevator. “As soon as Steve and I’s floor was done he called everyone up. So the second week you were in the hospital. It’s… A gathering now. Today’s more tame, since some are out on missions and the Guardians finally left.”

“Huh.” Tony hummed as they watched the elevator doors shut. “So… How’re you feeling? I honestly didn’t think we’d see you much after you were dusted for five years. Thought you’d be cooped up with Steve to make up for lost time.”

Bucky gave him a look that Tony couldn’t quite decipher. “Steve’s not the only one I care about around here, Tones. And he wouldn’t have forgiven himself if he wasn’t at your bedside until you were cleared. You were fighting. Hard. Even out on that field - you died for a minute. Pepper told you to rest… But something came over Steve, and he ripped the front of your suit off and started CPR.”

“Steve saved me?” Tony asked, because he had never asked before. In two months he hadn’t asked what happened on the battlefield. “Wait, does that mean somebody kissed me?”

Bucky just laughed and Tony caught the almost imperceptible nod from him before they both got off the elevator. At that moment, Tony now understood the divorce. Pepper had seen the connection first hand, while Tony was dying. Because she had given up - and Steve hadn’t. And according to Pepper, Tony deserved someone willing to fight for him.

From across the room, Tony made eye contact with Pepper, who knew the look on his face. She motioned towards the kitchen and he followed her to talk in relative private. She looked good, happy, and Tony was happy about that. But now he wanted to talk to her about this because really Pepper was the only one who knew Tony better than he knew himself. Well, maybe her and Rhodey.

“What happened on the field?” Tony asked, keeping his voice down. “Steve gave me CPR?”

“I honestly thought you were dead, Tony. Watching Steve try so desperately - I thought it was a vain attempt. You had metal fused to your skin, your body was smoking from the infinity stones - but he pressed on anyway.” Pepper paused, bringing her hand to Tony’s scarred cheek. “When he brought his lips to yours to breathe for you, and your eyes opened again… I saw it like a true love’s kiss. A real fairy tale, right in front of me.”

“How long before that did you know?” Tony asked, searching her face.

“I told you in the car after Morgan pretty much told the paparazzi, remember?” Pepper took her hand back, “Since Loki showed up and you met Steve. You were head over heels. I swear you would have followed him around like a little kitten… But you knew, too. Knew that Steve wasn’t ready to move past Bucky. And by the time he was ready, you were too loyal to walk away from me and you. Then Bucky came back and your fallout happened and we just kept trying to keep ‘us’ together… But Tony, you spent more and more time in the workshop or with Morgan alone. When we talk, it’s about the business. The spark faded a long time ago, but neither of us wanted to admit it.”

Tony tilted his chin down, thinking for a moment like he always did. “Well… I do pride myself on being loyal.”

“To a fault. You’re like a cat, not a dog.” Pepper teased him, then stepped back. “And Tony? There’s no hard feelings here. Go at your own pace. You want to jump into bed with two super soldiers in a day? Do it. You want to wait? You can do that too... But all the near death we’ve had in the past decade? I wouldn’t drag my feet on the thought of ‘oh, I just got divorced’. Live, Tony.”

For a long minute, Tony was lost in his thoughts. A single tear slipped down his cheek before he smiled warily at Pepper, nodding a bit. “God, I still love you, Pepps. Always will. Because you are single-handedly the best person to ever walk into my life.”

“Just because we’re divorced doesn’t mean I’m walking out either, Tony. I’m here. Remember that.” She smiled sweetly and put a hand over his chest where his arc reactor had once sat before she put her hand fully down at her own side.

“I realized something while I was in that god-awful hospital.” Tony looked over towards the lounge, where the others were gathering and smiling, debating on what movie to watch with a great intensity that involved Clint pretending to be Godzilla.

“And what was that, when I thought you knew everything already?” Pepper teased again, her sense of humor not deterred by their relationship.

Tony rolled his eyes, but shrugged. “It’s simple… Living is a lot fucking harder than dying.”