FreeFalling

The glowing ring disappeared into thin air, leaving Peter stranded alone in a random alleyway in New York. It was pitch dark out. He was still in his suit. And there were a million and one half formed thoughts pounding in his head, but the only thing he could clearly think was,

“So, the Multiverse is a Thing.”

The absurdity of it all made him want to laugh until he cried. One minute, he was out performing his Friendly Neighbor Spiderman Duties (™) and the next, he’s worrying about some teenaged version of himself from another universe, the Green Goblin, and yet another version of himself who can somehow shoot webs out of his body? He has so many questions and honestly he’s scared of the answers. The night (day? Seconds? Hours? He’s not really sure how time in the multiverse works-) replayed in his head like a bad film.

He remembered some kid there- what was his name? Ned! He remembers Ned. The young wizard who brought him there. And ofcourse, his lovely Nana who commanded him to clean her cobwebs. There was another wizard there. One with a long red cloak. He was floating in the sky, the world seemed to be ripping apart at the seems, and MJ was falling, and -

MJ was falling.

MJ was falling.

Just like that, the hazy memories of a world, so similar to his, snapped into focus. Even the tiniest details, Peter could recall with perfect clarity. There was a girl. A spitfire of a girl with fire in her eyes and wit on her tongue. A girl so similar to Gwen it made him want to cry. Michelle Jones, MJ. The girl that made his other self’s eyes fill with love and admiration. Gwen used to make him like that, too. He remembered days when all he could think about was her laugh. He’d get so distracted that he nearly swang into a street lamp or two. He remembered her ferocity. Once she set her mind to something, it was happening. He remembered falling in love with her so effortlessly. Falling so fast, so hard that he hardly noticed he had fallen at all. Their love was just that - one long freefall. And she paid the price. He had looked at MJ and could only see a dead girl walking.

Then the other spidey had mentioned his own MJ - Mary Jane. A “complicated” affair apparently. And if Peter felt a pang of spite at the fact that all the other versions of him had someone - well that was his business. A complicated affair was better than a corpse six feet under. And why- why should he not get his ‘MJ’? Why should he not get his love story?

Before long, the battle had begun. Next thing he knew, he was being flung in all directions as he just tried to land a solid hit with the cure. Eventually, they got into a rhythm. A small game of Keep Away. The rules were simple: distract the bad guys, pass the cure. Matt was the tricky one. With an electrical device strapped to his chest like a battery pack, the man was sending out electricity left and right. That is - at least until he got the full force of three spideys. Then all that was left was the Goblin, who was -. Somewhere.

A green blur whipped past him, the air bursting around him in a cool blast. There was a shrill scream. And she was falling. She was falling. He watched in horrified awe as his teenaged version dived after the prone figure of MJ. Was this what it looked like? His fingertips inches away from hers. Him putting all his strength into a singular motion. His eyes set into raw determination as if he could save her through will alone. But fate is a fickle mistress, and spidey was swept away with a harsh bang. Peter didn’t know what happened. One second, his other self was there - reaching out as far as he could to save the love of his life. And the next he was gone.

Peter took his place. In truth, he didn’t even think. He just jumped. He could see it all so clear. One moment, there was MJ. Her arm outstretched in a screaming plea for help. Next, there was Gwen. Her golden hair forming a halo around her head. Then MJ - a gasp overtaking her lips. Gwen - her eyes wide in panic. MJ - the feeling of weightlessness. Of falling and being unsure of how you’ll land. Gwen - sharp pain shooting through her head. MJ - the metallic taste of blood filling her mouth. Gwen - an instantaneous feeling of nothingness. MJ - Peter felt his fingertips press against her cool hand. Gwen - Peter's fingers brushing through matted hair. Slick wet blood coating his glove. He failed her. She trusted him and he failed her. He swore he would protect her. She was all he had and she fell. She fell. And he was so close - so close but not close enough. Never close enough. MJ - He felt his feet hit the ground with aching pain. He looked into her face. Gwen - her eye’s closed. Never to open again. (Never to breathe- Never speak- Never to laugh- Never to feel- Never to love again). MJ - Eyelashes fluttering open.

Peter thinks he might have cried. Honestly, he couldn’t tell. All he could do was stare at the non-believing face of MJ. He did it. He saved her. And if he looked hard enough, he could almost believe it was Gwen in his arms. He could hear him - his other teenage self- scream MJ’s name. A relief he never got to feel coating Spidey #1’s voice. In spite of himself, in spite of the memories tugging at his mind, he smiled.

He remembers the pain of killing Gwen. He remembers the anger and hurt and fear. He remembers the days he spent kicking walls and not even trying to pull his punches. He remembers wanting to make others feel just as bad as he did. To make them hurt. To make them feel like their worlds were cracking and falling away - just like his. How in a single moment - he just wasn’t good enough to save his world. So, when Spidey #1 got ready to strike a fatal blow, he stepped forward. He has grown, He felt the world crack and bend. He felt the ground fall from beneath his feet. All too well, he knows the feel of a freefall. And all too well, he knows the ache of revenge. It never lasts. He drew blood in the name of a woman who would never want such a sacrifice. And so, he gave Spidey #1 the syringe.

Peter could feel the magic taking him, dismembering him, putting him back together. Placed into that random alley in the middle of New York.

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A Year Later

Spiderman - Friendly Again?
Non-violent arrests up by 70% - Why the sudden change in Spidey’s methods?
Is the Friendly Neighborhood Spiderman Back? Witness Tells All

Peter’s time in the other dimension (and wow is that a sentence he never thought he'd say) stuck with him. He likes to think he grew a little along the way. It no longer hurts to think of Gwen. He'll no longer feel the sting of tears when tries to whisper her name into existence. He still thinks of her. He’ll see a scarf or a hat and think “Gwen would love this”. She will never completely exit his life. Honestly, he doesn’t want her to. Her blood is on his hands. She’s his responsibility. (“After all” Ben’s voice whispers, “With great power comes great responsibility”). But, it got better. He can smile and laugh without her absence weighing on his mind like an anvil. He doesn’t feel the need to make others feel his pain. Now, he just wants to save Gwen in the little ways. He sees her. He sees her as the little girl stuck in the burning building. He sees her in the eyes of the boy he saves from a potential mugging. He sees her in the quivering smile of a teen who was scared to walk home alone in the dark. He couldn’t save her. He may never accept that fact. But he can save these people.

Now, Peter stands in the middle of an alley in the middle of a random part of New York - this one different then the one he was left in one year ago. There he stopped - pspspsp-ing at a stubborn cat stuck on a ledge. Trying his hardest to save Gwen in the little ways, even if that means embarrassing himself in front of an unamused cat for the better part of an hour.

“You seem to be having trouble there” a feminine voice speaks out from behind him. Spinning around, Peter is struck with the image of a woman about his age with vibrant red hair and bright blue eyes.

“Just a little” He smiles politely. The young woman simply scoffs before pulling herself to stand precariously upon the lowest windowsill.
“What are you doing?” He eyed her feet where they lay half over the ledge.

“Saving a cat from a metaphorical tree,” she smirks, rifling through her purse. With a triumphant grin, she pulls out a small silver cylinder.

“I already tried nudging our feline friend. He doesn’t take kindly to it” He warns, lifting up his forearms to show her the long red lines that run down them. She simply snorted before using the tip of her fingernail to flip a small black switch on her device. A small red laser emits from the device, projecting itself upon the brick of the wall behind her. She began pointing the laser in the direction of the cat, quickly gaining it’s attention. The cat’s lazy eyes immediately perked up at the sight of the small red dot. It stood slowly with a large yawn and began to follow the light. Meticulously, the woman mapped out a passageway for the Calico to jump into her awaiting arms. Shifting the cat into one hand, she dropped the laser into her purse. With one small leap, she was back on level ground with Peter.
“I-” Peter stammered, slightly dumbfounded by the woman in front of him.

“There are a lot of outdoor cats by my apartment. Helps to have a laser pointer” she replied casually, dropping the cat into his arms. She continued to walk past Peter, and into the mouth of the alley.

“I’ll -uh- keep that in mind” he said dumbly. “Um…My name’s Peter.” He called to her retreating back.

“Hello Peter,” she yelled from behind her shoulder, “Name’s Maria Jordan. But you can call me MJ.”

Once again, Peter found himself freefalling.