It was strange. From the first second they saw each other to the last. It was confusing, new, hard. But mostly just strange. They didn’t know each other at all, but shared one destiny. It goes different ways for each of them, but it also sometimes looks exactly the same. The understanding of each other was on another level, almost like hearing thoughts.
The youngest Peter was the hardest to read, he was new, just in the beginning of his way. He was broken, broken in pieces, lost and powerless. He needed help so much, he broke the universe. Looking at him was painful, every second. He looked exactly the same one day, he changed, but he could never forget.
Peter-Two (how strange and funny it sounded for the first time) was somehow different. He seemed older, calmer, smarter. His face always looked sad, there was a lot of pain in his eyes. But at the same time those eyes were like the cleanest and deepest water on earth. His sight comforted him so much. And his smile… Light and polight. Soft, like a lover's hug. Peter-Two felt like a relief. And maybe like freedom.
“I think that this is beautiful,” - he said once, looking through the window.
“What exactly?” - Peter-Three caught his calm sight.
“The universe,” - he took a pause that lasted forever - “Us.”
Peter-Three wanted more time with him. He wanted to be closer, to listen more carefully. He needed more. Because that for the first time in years meant he wasn’t alone. His universe was empty. Empty without beloved ones, enemies and meaning. He lost his purpose, like he lost her. Here things were different, here he was needed. He was helpful. He could share his pain and his happiness.
“It is so wonderful, that you have no idea how amazing you are,” - he said, looking directly at him.
They had their moment of rest, shared a bottle of wine and their thoughts. It was pretty dark, but one lighter was still on. In the warm yellow light Peter-Two looked even better. They sat next to each other, shoulder by shoulder. And touching him felt differently somehow.
“Stop, you make me nervous,” - answered Peter-Three, feeling like he is again a sixteen years old boy, who met his crush for the first time.
“You need to understand yourself, embrace yourself, if you want to keep living and being a Spider-man. If you hate yourself that much, how are you going to save others from that?”, - he drank a little bit of the wine and continued, “I hated myself too and once I completely lost myself. Neither of that ever helped me.”
“I can’t do that just because you told me to.”
“I know. But you need to start trying at least. All I see in your eyes is pain and regret.”
“How can I forgive myself? Did you?”, - he closed his eyes, trying to concentrate on keeping breathing. Peter-Two smelled like hope.
“I did not. I am responsible for his death, but just partly. Everyone else involved, everything is connected. Universe is so big and full, I’m sure there are some worlds where I, or you, saved them. But there are also ones, where they lost us,” - Peter-Two smiled at him, softly touching his hand. “You need to understand the pain of losing someone, if you want to save others from it. And you can’t change your past, but you can change the future.”
His voice was comforting, it felt almost teraphetic. Like Peter was sick all that time and now someone finally found the treatment. Of Course he already knew everything that Peter-Two said, but he never had powers to say that to himself. Now these words were out there in the world. And they will be remembered. And they will help him.
“Thanks,” - Peter-Two said, unconsciously touching the other Peter too.
They touched each other's hand. Running fingers on each other's skin. That was really weird, it kinda felt like touching himself. His feelings were doubled. Like he could not only feel Peter-Two touches, but his own too. The feeling was overwhelming. Amazing, actually. Peter-Two awkwardly brouth others hand to his mouth and then whispered.
“May I?”
Peter-Three just nodded, feeling his heart somewhere in the throat. They both had an interesting and unreasonable influence on each other. It was more than just meeting someone who understands you, but more like finally finding you. All your journey as a person, a human, it all ends here. On the other ones beginning. Peter-Two lips, small and warm, on his hand felt like he was touching the time itself.
It felt, like at the same time he was not only looking at other Peter, but also inside his own head. Peter-Three touched his face, slowly and thoughtfully. His cheeks, his ears. He softly touched his eyelids, closing his eyes. And finally touching his lips. Peter-Two tasted like the future.
Kissing him somehow felt like all of his kisses before and the ones, which yet didn’t happen. He tasted like Gwen on one second and like Mary on the other. He tasted like Peter, another Peter and someone else. He wasn’t sweet, he was fresh and cold, warm and breathtaking. Like jumping through that portal again and again and again, like being somewhere in between the worlds.
“Should we stop?” - he asked carefully, between their kisses. Scared of the answer.
“Right question is: Do you want to stop or not?” - said Peter-Two, softly laughing in his lips, “It’s not like the universe is collapsing, so?”
“So?”
Peter-Two kissed him again, soft and nice.
It’s not like it was wrong, but at the same time it kinda felt like that. He was scared to be caught, to be asked. But at the same time he was scared to stop, to go away. To disappear. He could taste their possible life on the inch of Peter’s tongue.
What would happen, if they had a chance? What if they were in one universe, that they could meet normally. Live normally. Talk on their walks in the university and in fancy cafes. Help each other with projects, friendships, relationships. What would happen, if they were always there for each other? A crazy thought came across his mind, stupid and selfish one. They could just stop this-universe-Peter, just destroy or control that magic machine. And stay here. Together.
This dream felt nice, but impossible. That meant the end of the world, of the universe and all of that. But doing the right thing would mean forever losing him. It meant never seeing him again. That meant going back to the loneliness of his world, fighting alone. Never hearing his voice, seeing his big-big blue eyes. Never feeling so understood and accepted, never feeling so trusting again.
Several days or hours after all this they will be back “home”, like nothing happened. Like they never met one another.
“When I look at the sky, I think about all the other worlds there in the endless universe,” - Peter-Two said, softly touching him. “Now I know that they are real. And in one of them there is you, another Amazing Spider-Man, who also looks there. That's how we will see each other again.”
That was probobly the first his stupid thought, but he said it honestly. Because he also needed to believe in it. Because no matter how kind and smart he was, he was also scared. He also tasted their life together, and also got that selfish idea. And also let it go, like he never caught it.
And that was how he will remember him forether. Wise Spider-man from another, maybe much simpler universe, that is heartbroken in exactly the same way. He will remember his beautiful eyes and how he looked at him when he disappeared forever. He will remember his laugh, very quiet and awkward. His soft gentle touches. His lips. And his last words.
“See you later, Peter”.