Chapter Seven
"Well, hello, Little Miss." Steve smiled in greeting when Lainey toddled over to him.
"Hi!" Lainey gripped the leg of his pants to prevent herself from toppling over. "Unca' Steve!"
Steve just about gushed and lifted the child up into his arms so they were at eye-level. Lainey loved being in his arms because he was so tall. She loved to look down at everything on the ground from his high height.
"Good morning." He pecked her cheek. "Did you eat breakfast yet?"
He was such a grandpa, making sure that the little tyke's belly was full and she was content.
It had been several weeks since the 'incident', and Bruce and Tony still hadn't found a cure for Lainey's condition. As selfish as it was, Natasha didn't at all mind that the process was taking so much time. She couldn't have any children of her own and she didn't think she ever would, but when this happened, it opened the door for that possibility.
Lainey was a little ray of sunshine. She woke up with a smile on her face, she was almost always in a good mood, she was so respectful, and she loved to be loved. Natasha didn't think she had ever met a better baby. Lainey was an absolute gem of a child.
Of course, she was biased, but still.
She didn't know how Allison had actively decided to hurt this precious little thing for all those years. And if Natasha had known about her back then, she definitely would've done something about it.
"No!" Lainey shook her head. "Mama make me pancakes! See?" She pointed to the redhead who was taking some food out of the microwave.
And in that moment, both adults froze. Had Lainey just said what they thought she said? Steve really, really hoped so. He could see how much Natasha loved the girl and how attached she was getting to her, and he really did want this for the both of them. But of course, only if they wanted it for themselves.
Natasha on the other hand, was in complete and utter shock. She couldn't figure out if Lainey had slipped up or if she had heard wrong. But what if she had heard right? What if Lainey had actually called her, 'Mama'? She would be over the moon! But it was too good to be true. She wasn't meant to be a mother. She just wasn't mother material.
"Uh, Lainey?" Steve cleared his throat. "Can you— Can you repeat that, please? We didn't hear you, Doll."
"Mama make pancakes." Lainey repeated her statement, this time, rubbing her belly. "Yum."
Natasha set the plate full of pancakes down on the island counter and looked directly at Lainey, immediately seeing her in a new light. Her innocent eyes shined, her smile was blinding, and her little voice was music to her ears. She was beautiful. Absolutely beautiful.
And she was hers.
"I make Mama cry?" Lainey frowned.
Natasha's hands flew up to her face to see what Lainey was talking about. And lo and behold, she was crying. She hadn't even noticed, she was so overwhelmed with love. She thought that if Lainey called her, 'Mama' one more time, she'd be a pool of tears.
"No." She sniffled, wiping her cheeks. "No, you didn't make Mama cry."
"Why then?"
"Sometimes." Natasha took the child from Steve and set her down on top of the island. "Sometimes, when people are really happy, they cry."
"Happy?"
"That's right." She nodded. "I'm very happy right now, so I can't help it."
Lainey smiled and wrapped her little arms around the agent's neck, offering her a hug before she pulled away, pushing her mouth into a smiling position. "Smile, Mama, okay?"
She was too young to understand that happy tears were very real. Her toddler mind could only associate tears with sadness. She didn't believe that Natasha could possibly be happy right now. You had to smile in order to be happy. And Natasha wasn't smiling.
The woman laughed and tickled the child's tummy, setting her down in her high chair before she set the plate of food down in front of her. "Eat your breakfast. Small bites, remember?"
"Small bites." Lainey parroted, taking a decently sized bite.
"Good girl."
"Mama? I make a picture?"
"Mama, up!"
"Mama, hold!"
Ever since Lainey had tried out the moniker to address Natasha, she couldn't stop saying it. Natasha thought it was adorable. Lainey probably didn't really get to call Allison, 'Mama' very much due to the woman's stoic and detached way of raising the child, so she was cashing in now.
And it wasn't like Natasha wasn't enjoying every single minute of it. She, being the person she was, took plenty of pictures and videos of the girl so she'd have evidence for when Tony and Bruce fixed this mess.
The two were still working diligently in the lab to try and find a cure, but since Tony still didn't know what caused this in the first place, he still didn't know how to fix it.
And the days were just ticking by.
"Mama, I play?" Lainey asked, kicking her little feet as they hung from her place in a shopping cart.
The team was running low on food, so Natasha offered to go on a grocery store run in order to get everything they needed and Lainey just tagged along for the fun of it.
"No, you may not get down and play." She shook her head. "The grocery store is not a playground."
"They play?" The two year old pointed to a couple of kids who were on the ground, wrestling each other on one side of the aisle they were in. "I play, too, Mama?"
"They're playing, because their Mama hasn't taught them not to act like that in public." Natasha glared at the two boys, who immediately straightened up and kept quiet. "You, however, know better than that."
Lainey pouted at the prospect of not being able to run wild, but quickly brightened when she saw a package of chocolate chip cookies. "I have, please?"
"Put one in the cart." The redhead relented after seeing her face light up.
Lainey grinned and reached out, grabbing a single package, dropping it into the basket behind her before Natasha could tell her to set it down gently.
At this rate, the baby would be spoiled. Natasha couldn't find it in herself to say no to the small luxuries she asked for. She couldn't help it, she had to make up for all those years Lainey was with Allison.
And it wasn't like she was the only one. Everyone in the Tower had been spoiling her. Steve was constantly cooking her favorite foods, Tony kept buying her toys, Clint dropped everything just to play with her, and Bruce bought her a little rocking horse to occupy her time.
"I share with Unca' Steve and Unca' Clint." She stated proudly, having forgotten all about wanting to play with the two children they had passed by.
"That's very nice of you. I'm sure they'll appreciate that." Natasha scanned the shopping list while still pushing the cart. "Can Mama, Uncle Tony, and Uncle Bruce have some, too?"
"Yeah." Lainey nodded. "And Titi."
The girl had very recently started calling Maria, 'Titi'. She also used the title to refer to Laura and Pepper, but in this case, Natasha knew exactly who she was talking about. When S.H.I.E.L.D. fell, Maria applied for a job at Stark Industries, which meant that she'd be around the Tower very often if not all the time. And Lainey loved to spend time with her. Maria always acted as if she was bothered by her company, but really she gloated inwardly about how often Lainey came by to see her.
"That's a whole lot of sharing." Natasha smiled. "You're so sweet."
"Mama, I walk, please?"
Now, Natasha didn't really want to have to push the cart, find the items on the list, and keep track of Lainey all at the same time, but she also didn't want to stomp all over Lainey's independence either.
"Alright." She lifted her out of the cart and set her on her feet. "But I want you holding onto the cart. The minute I see you walking by yourself, you're going right back in."
"No, Mama!" Lainey's eyes widened.
"No?" Natasha cocked a brow. "Then you can go back in right now."
"I hold!" Lainey's chubby little hand shot out to grasp the cart. "See, Mama?"
"Just make sure you stay that way."
"I hold, Mama." Lainey assured the woman, diligently walking alongside the cart.
But two year olds, no matter how smart they were, had very short attention spans. After a few more aisles, a thought sparked in Lainey's mind.
Ice cream.
She knew that it could only be but a few aisles down. She could go get some and bring it back to put in the cart without disturbing Natasha. The plan was genius if she did say so herself.
And slipping away was a piece of cake. Natasha was too busy looking for the right kind of bread that was on the list to pay attention to what was happening. Lainey was kind of proud of herself. And she thought Natasha would be so proud of her for helping with the shopping trip.
She ignored the concerned looks that she got from a few adults as she found the frozen section, finally making it to where the ice cream was located. Now, Lainey couldn't read yet, so she was heavily relying on the pictures on the cartons to determine which flavor was which. She knew that Natasha loved mint chocolate chip, that was the green one, so maybe she could pick some up for her.
Meanwhile, a few aisles down, Natasha had found the bread she was looking for and put it in the cart. And she immediately knew Lainey was missing.
Her breath quickened and her body tensed as she looked up and down the aisle she was in, hoping to find the child. How could she have possibly lost her? Why hadn't she been paying attention to her? Where could she be?
She never should have let her out of the cart.
"Lainey?" She called, trying to keep her voice calm and even as she began her search. "Alayna?"
She had to push down the sickening feeling of worry when she received no response. Lainey had to be somewhere in this grocery store. She would find her and she'd never let her out of her sight again. Not even for a second.
It had happened before, but an eight year old child wandering off was very different from a two year old doing the same thing. Eight year olds knew how to retrace their steps and call out for someone to find them. Two year olds just kept wandering.
She was so investing in one of those child leashes when this was over.
"Alayna?"
Natasha really had to think about where the child would be. Usually, kids that young would get distracted by something they wanted and wander off without realizing how far they were going to end up. Maybe this was the case with Lainey.
Ice cream! That little girl loved ice cream. She must have taken it upon herself to find some of the frozen dessert. Little scamp.
"Excuse me?" A kind woman interrupted her thoughts.
"Yes?"
"Are you looking for a small child?"
"Yes, have you seen her?"
"She's in the frozen section, a cute little thing." No judgement, no anger, no weird looks, just plain, helpful directions.
"Thank you." Natasha smiled and raced right to the aisle in question and let out a breath she hadn't even realized she was holding when she saw the two year old staring at the freezers, deep in thought. "Alayna!"
Lainey gasped when she felt the woman's arms pull her away from the ice cream. Maybe she was wrong. It didn't look like Natasha was very happy that she had found the ice cream all by herself. Maybe she shouldn't have walked away from the cart after all.
Her mama's eyebrows were all scrunched together and her mouth looked like a straight line. That only happened when Lainey did something wrong. Maybe the ice cream could've waited.
"What were you thinking?"
"I get ice cream, Mama. Look." She pointed at the delicious treat.
"What did I tell you?"
"I hold the cart."
"So then why did you let go?"
"I get ice cream for Mama." Lainey tried to explain when the redhead narrowed her eyes at her. "Green ice cream."
Natasha's features softened at the explanation. But she was still running on pure adrenaline. Lainey had just walked off out of her sight. That wasn't something she could just let slide.
"Honey, I want you to listen to Mama." She spoke firmly. "I know that you love ice cream and I know that you wanted to get me some. But you cannot go wandering off all by yourself. It isn't safe."
"Not safe?"
"Not safe for Lainey." She confirmed. "I need to be able to see you."
"I scare you?"
"Yes, honey, you did."
"I sorry, Mama." Lainey eyes grew wet with unshed tears and her bottom lip quivered.
"I know you are, sweetheart." Natasha felt like this would be a good time to drop the scolding tone from her voice. "You don't have to cry. I know."
It was safe to say that after the grocery store fiasco, Natasha made sure she knew where Lainey was at all time. The child was sneaky, but she was no match for the spy. She was always within hearing distance of the woman, and on the offhand chance that that wasn't the case, Jarvis always knew where she was.
Natasha had felt so guilty since the shopping incident that she called Laura and told her all about it, only to find out that the mother of two had lost track of Cooper a couple of times. Of course, she could laugh about it now, but back when it happened, she was a nervous wreck. The story made Natasha feel a little better, but she was still paranoid.
She and Clint had to make a quick run out to the store to pick something up, but she didn't want to take Lainey along for fear of losing her again. But she also didn't want to leave her behind. Her little feelings might get hurt. Luckily, Steve offered to keep an eye on her while she was out to calm her nerves.
Steve could absolutely be trusted around the baby. He loved her and she loved him. They had a great time together and today would be no different. And if he really needed any help, he could always bring Bruce and Tony up to his floor for some help.
She was still beyond upset with the both of them, but it wasn't like they had planned for this to happen. Accidents do occur and Lainey shouldn't have been down there in the first place. It couldn't have been helped. And now she was getting to enjoy Lainey as a toddler, so she couldn't exactly complain. But she did miss her Lainey.
"Where Mama go?" Steve had been trying to distract Lainey while Natasha got ready to leave, but she was just too smart and too observant to fall for it.
"Mama's going out for a little while." Steve tried to get her to stop looking at the woman who was shoving her shoes onto her feet.
The two were playing with some blocks to build a castle. Lainey had been excited, rambling on and on about princes and princesses in her two year old lingo, but was completely caught off guard by Natasha making her way out the door.
"Mama go?" Her eyes widened. "Why?"
"I just need to get a few things and I'll be back." Natasha tried to make it seem like no big deal. Which it was, but to Lainey, it was serious business.
"I go, too?"
"Not this time, sweetheart. You don't do well in stores."
"I go, too!" Lainey dropped the blocks she had been playing with onto the floor and toddled over to the woman, latching onto her leg. "Go with Mama!"
"No, Lainey." Honestly, this was breaking Natasha's heart, but she needed to remain strong. "Mama's going out with Uncle Clint and you're staying here with Uncle Steve. It's gonna be fun, I promise."
"No!" Lainey stomped her socked foot. "I go with Mama!"
"Mama said, 'no', Lainey." Natasha shook her head, standing her ground. "You're staying here to play with Uncle Steve until I get back."
Lainey pouted when she was pried off of her mother and regained her bearings just in time to see the elevator door close behind her.
"Lainey, come on, Honey." Steve spoke gently. "Come and play. Mama will be home soon."
He had no idea if it was what he said, how he said it, or the fact that he had said it all, but right after the words left his lips, Lainey burst into unbridled tears.
And boy could toddlers cry. They were loud, emotionally hurt, and hysterical. And Lainey was, by no means, an exception. Her chest heaved up and down as sobs escaped her throat and tears poured down her face faster than she could stop them.
It was heartbreaking for Steve to have to listen to, but he knew he had to be level-headed. Lainey needed him right now and he couldn't be falling apart just because her tears were tugging at his heartstrings.
"Alright." He stood up and walked over to her, scooping her up in one fluid motion. "C'mere, Pal. It's okay." He soothed, making his way into the kitchen. "It's okay."
He figured that since it was early in the afternoon, then Lainey hadn't had her nap yet. So all this crying must've been because she was exhausted. And what better beverage to put a baby out, than milk?
He remembered back in the forties, when Bucky's baby sister, Rebecca, missed her daily naps, she cried over things she wouldn't cry over under normal circumstances. It was her body's way of trying to tell the adults to put her down to sleep so she could relax and rest.
"Here you go, Honey." He spoke after fixing her a bottle of warm milk. "Drink up."
"M-Mama….." Lainey hiccuped, eyeing the bottle before lifting it into her mouth.
Steve knew that now that she was drinking, he needed to act fast. Lainey loved her milk. She was always in a good mood after she was finished with a bottle, but he wasn't sure her good mood would last very long once the distraction was gone.
So, snagging her pacifier and carrying her over to the couch, he turned the tv on and put on 'The Wizard of Oz'. It was her very favorite thing to watch. She could just sit there and stare at the screen for hours on end watching it with him, singing all the songs and wiggling to the music.
This was perfect.
"Look what I put on for you, Honey." He nudged her once he set her down next to him.
Lainey looked up at him with sad eyes before turning her attention to the tv, slightly lighting up at the sight of Dorothy and Toto. Her chubby little hand reached up to twirl a single curl as she relaxed against the couch, drinking her milk with a content look on her face.
Steve had to admit. He was quite proud of himself for this one. He had managed to calm the toddler down without the help of Clint or Natasha. And it went smoothly. Of course it did help that Lainey was an easy baby. Too easy, in fact. She pretty much behaved all the time and was more polite than the average two year old. It could have had something to do with her upbringing, but it wasn't exactly like they could discuss it with her now. All they could do was coddle her and make her feel safe.
"Rainbow Song!" Lainey momentarily stopped drinking in order to tell him what was going on.
"I know." Steve mock gasped. "It's so pretty, isn't it?"
"Flabalous."
The blonde man let out a soft chuckle at her mispronunciation of the word 'fabulous', but didn't correct her. As far as he was concerned, she had said it the right way, and everyone else was wrong.
"Milk." She sat up and kept sipping until the bottle was empty. "All gone."
"All gone?" He asked, taking it from her, replacing it with her soother. "Here you go. Enjoy."
Lainey smiled and found her eyes growing quite heavy. She loved milk, but it seemed like every single time she drank it, she felt sleepy afterwards. That wasn't fair. Stevie wasn't tired. But Stevie didn't drink any milk. Maybe if he did, he'd want to sleep, too. A small price to pay for greatness.
What had she been so upset about anyway? Oh, right. Mama left to go to the store and didn't take her along. But she couldn't find it in herself to get upset again. Her eyelids were far too heavy for that. Maybe she'd air out her grievances when Mama came back home. That would show her.
But for now, she would sleep.
Steve noticed her new lack of energy and gently lifted her onto his lap to cradle her while she finally fell asleep to the merry little tune of munchkins singing in the background.
"Steve?"
"…..Steve, wake up."
Natasha shook the man's shoulder one last time before giving up and pulling her phone out. She had just come back from a long day of shopping, only to find her daughter and her babysitter fast asleep on the couch.
And they looked comfy. Steve was laying across the couch with his legs up and Lainey was right on top of him, her fist gripping tightly to his shirt while his hand rested gently on her back. They were so cute. Natasha couldn't help but take a picture.
She had been doing a lot of that lately. Since this whole de-aging debacle happened, Natasha began to see it as an opportunity to make several memories for Lainey to look back on. The poor girl only had a few pictures from her early childhood and Natasha herself hadn't gotten to experience all of that with her, so this was the perfect solution. She had printed a whole lot of them out from her phone and was going to put them all in a photo album she had just picked up. She wasn't one for sentiment, but this was Lainey. She brought it out of her.
This picture was definitely going in there.
"What time is it?" Steve groaned, his eyes fluttering open.
"It's three in the afternoon, sleepyhead." She teased. "You know, when I asked you to babysit, I never expected you to take a nap with her, too."
"Very funny." He sat up, mindful of Lainey's sleeping form. "When did you get back?"
"Twenty minutes ago. I had to put everything away, so I figured I'd let you sleep for a bit. How was she? Thanks for watching her, I really didn't want to risk her wandering off again."
"She was great." He waved her off. Watching Lainey was no trouble at all. It had been fun…..until he fell asleep. "She cried a little after you left, but it was nothing I couldn't handle."
"Well, thanks again. I appreciate it." Natasha flashed him a rare smile. "I should probably wake her up or else she won't sleep tonight."
"Yeah, it's been a while."
"Lainey?" She rubbed the child's back. "C'mon, Little One, it's time to wake up."
All Lainey did was whine and push her hand away. She wasn't in the mood.
"Well then, I guess you don't want to see what I brought back for you." Natasha shrugged, pulling the pacifier from out of the toddler's mouth.
"For me?" Came the little groggy reply.
"Just for you. But you have to be awake to get it."
"I wake up." Lainey rubbed her eyes and crawled off of Steve's lap. "Where my present, please?"
"Can I get a 'hello', first?"
"Привет, мамочка."
Natasha took a mental note of the fact that that was the first time Lainey has spoken Russian since she had been shrunk down to be the size of Thumbelina. But she didn't comment on it, because she didn't want to make her self-conscious about it.
She just found it a little odd that she had let the Russian slip from her tongue when Spanish was her native language.
Maybe she was looking too much into this. Maybe it was nothing.
"Hi, Sweetheart." She kissed her cheek.
"My present now?"
Natasha picked something up and held it out to the child, relieved when she saw the look of excitement on her face.
"Обезьяна!" Lainey squealed, taking the item from her, holding it to her chest.
It was a plush 'Curious George'. Lainey had recently become obsessed with all things 'Curious George' after Natasha had read a couple of the books to her and sat with her to watch the television show whenever it aired.
Lainey absolutely fell in love with the mischievous little monkey and had verbally expressed, several times, that the Man in the Yellow Hat reminded her of Steve. Of course, Natasha got quite a few laughs out of that one, but she could see where Lainey was going with it. Steve was patient and very loving. He always had time for Lainey, and if he didn't, he made time. He never scolded the toddler for exploring or trying new things. It wasn't an outrageous comparison.
Very observant for a toddler.
"Да." Natasha nodded. "It's George."
"For me, Mama?" Lainey just couldn't believe that something so special and so wonderful could belong to her and she was waiting for Natasha to take it back.
"Just for you. He found me, you know."
"He founded you?" Her eyes grew wide as she kept her hold on the monkey that was nearly as big as she was.
"Oh yeah." Natasha could see the twinkle in Steve's eyes as she continued to tell her tall tale. "I wasn't looking for him. I was just walking through the store when he caught my attention. And do you know what he said?"
"What?"
"He said, that he had been waiting a really long time to find a friend to go home to. I saw a whole bunch of little children in that store, so I asked him why he didn't go with one of them. Well, he said that he was waiting on someone special and asked if I knew a little girl who needed a friend, too."
If it was possible, Lainey hugged the monkey tighter to herself and nuzzled her face in his soft fur. She loved this story.
"Of course, I said yes and invited him to come home with me. And look at him now. He's so happy."
"Mama, hug?"
"C'mere." Natasha opened her arms and let Lainey fall into them.
"I love you, Mama." The girl sniffled, touched by the gesture of kindness.
"I love you, too, sweet girl." The redhead kissed the top of her head, her teary eyes locking with Steve's. "Oh, you have idea."
Maybe she wasn't failing at this mother thing after all.