The Motel
I felt like I’d just stepped into a trashy fanfic.
The front desk clerk hadn’t looked me in the eye the entire time I stood in the lobby, water streaming off my coat and onto the tile floor. I grimaced in sympathy for whoever had to clean it later.
‘It’s a forty dollar charge if you lose the key, checkout is at eleven. Enjoy your stay’. Her voice was as hollow as her expression, her eyes only fluttered up from the computer screen when Loki spoke. The way he managed to charm everyone he met reminded me of the cat I had when I was younger, who had everyone cooing over his handsome fur and good manners.
‘Lovely’ I huffed and swiped the key attached to a clunky plastic tag. The key, and the entire motel for that matter, had been left for dead in the 80’s. The only two things that gave away the decade we were actually in were the computer and the people.
It had been a day from hell. Starting as what was supposed to be a simple recon mission, it somehow ended in guts and blood. I was sore, tired, beat up, and a little bloody. All hope of curling up in my own bed back at the compound vanished with a rainstorm heavy enough that Stark couldn't get anyone to fly us back. We were stuck in the middle of, Iowa? Illinois? Indiana? Some god awful mid western state, in the smallest town I have ever been in, at a motel between a dairy farm and a corn field. The rain made travel difficult, even for the people that were driving. So of course, the motel only had one room left.
My boots clunked on the tile and I shook more water out of my hair as I walked, not waiting to see if Loki would follow. He gave himself away though by leaning in towards my ear.
‘Don’t act so disappointed to be sharing a bed with me darling.'
The roll of my eyes was a very natural movement when I was around Loki. ‘Don’t get your hopes up, we’re not sharing a bed.' I fiddled with the lock on room 13 before hearing a click and shoving past the entrance, eager to put some distance between Loki and I.
My bag landed on the carpet next to the couch and I began to peel my coat and boots off.
Loki had an annoying habit of staring at me. His eyes were always lingering. I’m usually very good at reading people but I could never tell what he was thinking when looking at me. I’m not sure he knew what he was thinking either.
‘You don’t have to make up the couch for me dear’ he noted as I pulled down extra sheets and pillows from the top of the closet and began to arrange them.
‘Ha, bold of you to assume I would ever do anything for you. I’m taking the couch. I’m far too exhausted to fight over the bed.’ I began pulling dry clothes out of my bag.
‘I assure you, I don’t make it a habit to fight over beds.’ He smirked. I scoffed. A very natural exchange for us.
‘I’m not in the mood for games, I’m gonna change’ I leaned back up from my bag and a shock ran through my side. I hoped he didn’t notice my wince. I made it a habit to not seem weak around him.
I tried to walk away to the bathroom quickly but my wrist didn’t follow. He gently pulled me back a few steps.
‘You’re hurt.’
‘I’m fine.’
‘You’re too brave around me darling.’ I turned to face him and searched his face. His brow was furrowed but his eyes were soft; he held back a smirk.
‘I’m not being brave, it’s probably just a scratch’ I tried to pull and turn away again but the pain in my side flared up again at the movement. I bit back a gasp.
‘You’re bleeding through your shirt,’ he noted and traced the pattern staining the stark white of my button up, ‘you midgardians are so fragile.’
‘Believe me, I’m anything but fragile. I’m going to go take,. care of., it.,’ the adrenaline was wearing off and began to wince through my words. I gritted my teeth in hopes that the pain wouldn’t show I’m my face.
Stepping back again, I stumbled slightly. I was tired, wet, sore; I wanted to curl up in the shower and wash away all the pain from the day.
Loki moved with me to steady my stumble.
‘No you’re not. You need to sit. Come.’ He twisted past me, still holding my wrist, dragging me to the bathroom.
‘I told you, I can take care of myself.’ It was a half hearted protest.
‘And I told you, you can’t. Sit.’
A groan and eye roll is all I could manage. When I placed my hands on the bathroom counter and started to lift myself up I winced again. Loki gently placed his hands on my hips and lifted me up the rest of the way.
His hands lingered, I was too exhausted to mind. His left hand began to trail up to where the blood was pooling out onto my shirt, ‘do you mind?’ He looked me in the eye. I shrugged and unbuttoned my shirt.
I’m normally a shy person, but I knew there was nothing I needed to be shy about in that moment. I pulled my shirt off my shoulders for it to rest on my elbows and straightened so that Loki could look at the wound. I looked down; ouch. It was a lot worse than I thought. ‘It’s gonna need stitches,’ I huffed out, ‘I have a med kit in my bag.’ Loki pulled away from me to go find it. I rested the back of my head on the mirror behind me and closed my eyes until I heard his foot steps come back.
‘This is going to hurt.’ He warned before he pressed a bandage soaked in peroxide to my side.
I half heartedly let out a one syllable laugh. ‘Ha, forever underestimating me. You don’t get to be where I am if you can’t handle a little pain.’
He smirked, ‘you almost seem to enjoy it. You should get injured around me more often.’
My eyes rolled away from him out of habit.
‘I can numb you a little for the stitches, I can’t promise it won’t hurt though. Don’t get too excited.’ He threaded a needle and moved in closer, spreading my legs slightly with his hips.
I don’t think I’ve ever been this close to him unless we were training. It wasn’t for lack of trying on his end. When he wasn’t staring, he was moving to try and bridge the distance between us.
He likes to see if I will get nervous if he wanders too close. I never allow him the satisfaction.
The heat of the wound turned to ice and I gasped at the sudden change, as Loki gently traced his fingers around it to numb the area the best he could.
‘Do you play doctor often?’ I offered to steer the conversation in a different direction as he started to pull the needle through my skin.
‘I don’t make it a habit to heal people, I’m usually the one inflicting the wounds’, he paused and I watched his eyes trail across my torso and up to my chest. I suddenly felt very exposed. ‘You have a lot of scars. Are they all from missions?’
‘Most’ I said quietly. ‘You don’t scar easily, do you?’
He politely elected to ignore the way I was avoiding the subject of my scars and shrugged. ‘I told you. Midgardians are fragile. If someone wanted to leave a mark on me they’d have to be very insistent.’
I hummed in response. He lightly put his hand on my lower back and pulled it so that I was curved for him to see the rest of the stitching.
‘I don’t see you leave the compound much.’ It wasn’t a question but he was waiting for an answer.
‘I don’t have much to leave it for’ I offered. He pried too much. ‘There’s a bookstore I don’t mind wasting time in a few blocks away though. The kind you’d walk by a thousand times before you noticed it.’
This time he didn’t ignore my change of subject. ‘I hear most of everyone at the compound doesn’t have much to leave for either, no family or such. You’ve never talked about it, so I can assume it’s the same for you?’
I couldn’t tell if he was interested or just trying to distract me from the stitches weaving through my skin. I acted disinterested at the topic of family, ‘yeah, you can assume.’
He nodded slowly as he tied off the thread. ‘You don’t talk much about your life on the outside.’
‘That’s because there’s not much to talk about. I can handle the rest thanks.’ I shoved off the counter in an effort to push him away but he barely moved.
He lifted a hand to my chin, lifting it slightly and traced his thumb over my lip.
'You split your lip open too, I could numb that as well if you like.' There was a hint of playfulness in his voice.
'I told you, its fine.' I slapped a bandage over Loki’s handiwork and nudged him out of the way. He gave in and left me to change.
I stepped out, ready to flop onto the couch and put the day to rest. When I turned, I saw Loki was already laying on the couch, book in hand.
‘Move’ I said. I was done with him today. I crossed my arms, he didn’t even look up at me.
‘Take the bed’ is all the told me.
‘I told you, I’m not about to fight over sleeping arrangements. And don’t start doing that.’
‘Doing what?’ He turned a page.
‘Treating me like I’m a ‘fragile midgardian’. I don’t need you to give me the bed just because you’re pitying me.’ I huffed.
This time he looked up, ‘pity you? You never give me much to think of when it comes to you, so why would I pity you?’ He began to stand up and put his book down.
‘And what is that supposed to mean?’ I stood my ground as he stood up inches in front of me.
‘You’re a guarded person’ he huffed out. ‘I can charm anyone into telling me every detail of their lives. You don’t even let me see what you’re feeling. Every action and word you offer is designed to push me back.’
I felt small, standing underneath him with my head tilted back. I searched his eyes, trying to understand what game he was trying to play. ‘I can’t figure you out.’ Is all I could manage to retaliate.
‘People are not yours to figure out, dear. You act like everyone around you has an ulterior motive. The world isn’t against you’ he raised his arm to,
Well,
I wasn’t sure why he raised his arm because I instinctually flinched my head to the side, averting my eyes. His hand now hovered near my shoulder. He was staring at me again. Trying to read something on my face. I wouldn’t let him.
‘I’ll take the bed,’ I finally said as I stepped away to put distance between us, ‘not because you won, but because I’m exhausted.’
I walked towards the bed and found that my wrist had betrayed me again. I huffed but didn’t look at him. I longed for the past when he let me change the subject without acknowledging it.
‘What are your other scars from?’ He finally said. Softly. I don’t think I’d ever heard him speak softly with the undertone of kindness; his voice was usually carried by sarcastic or flirtatious tones.
Rejecting every instinct in my body, I turned on my heels to face him. I still couldn’t read his face. ‘It’s the reason I have nothing to leave the compound for,’ I finally offered. He looked into my eyes and I fought the urge to look down at my feet, ‘I had a dad, as most people do. He wasn’t kind to my mom. I interjected when I could, and when I did he wasn’t kind to me either. That’s that.’ In habit, I didn’t allow any emotion into my words or onto my face.
He stepped closer with hesitation. I moved my eyes from his to watch him move. When he finished closing distance, he said ‘do you think I would hurt you?’
I furrowed my brow at the question and brought my eyes up to his again, ‘that’s a ridiculous question, no one hurts me.’
I watched him raise his hand to tuck a piece of hair behind my ear, I stood my ground. ‘Because you don’t let people get close enough to do so’ again, not a question. I felt more exposed than on the bathroom sink. It went against every instinct I had to let anyone see me this transparently. ‘I want to get to know you, if you’d let me some time.’ His hand lingered in my hair.
I searched his eyes again. Usually, I could find at least three different emotions on his face. This time, all I could see was warmth.
I finally opened my mouth to speak, ‘another day, I’ve got too many issues to sort out tonight.’ I offered the ghost of a smile and made my way to the bed, I could tell he was still staring at me. ‘You don’t have to sleep on the couch though, the beds big enough. As long as you aren’t one of those annoying people who move too much in their sleep.’ I said without looking at him, climbing under the sheets and turning the light switch off near the entrance with my magic.
I heard a small one syllable laugh, a shuffle, and then felt the blankets rustle on the the other side of the bed.
I was too exhausted to think anymore.