“ANTHONY EDWARD STARK!”
Tony can hear from the clacking of the weight of those highly uncomfortable six-inch heels that this is not a happy walk. This is a barge. Pepper is furiously barging in toward him. Jumping from forty-two floor might be a stupid thing to do, but it would be worth it if Pepper pokes a hole in his forehead, no?
“Tony!” Pepper’s black pointy shoes come into view, she heard a tired sigh from behind the couch “for god’s sake, Tony. Get out from behind the couch”
Peeking one eye out, Tony smiled at her nervously “Pepper, Peppy, Preppy Pinhead Potts. In my defense, it wasn’t my fault”
“You were caught on tape challenging The Wakandan Prince for Trial by Combat!”
“As a joke” Tony defends himself “he was telling me this ritual, so I ask, if I win against him, I get to rule Wakanda?”
“On live tv?” Pepper shrieked
“The reporter took it out of context!” Tony explains exasperatedly
“Tony, you said you want to make a clean energy resource. Does it occur to your tiny little head that means you have to play nice with potential investors?” Pepper gritted her teeth “Contrary to your belief, not everything is about you, Tony”
“Well, it should” Tony crossed his arm childishly
“We are meeting the French investor next week, I’m expecting you to be on your best behavior, or help me god, I will make Jarvis plays Dora the Explores every time you walk into any room in the tower!”
“You can’t make me”
“Director Fury already give a go-ahead and cleared you out from any mission for two weeks. Nat and Steve will also be in the tower watching you on your best behavior”
Tony paused and then groaned, slumping forward and resting his forehead on the back of the couch.
“I’m expecting you to speak French fluently for the investor meeting” Pepper smiles almost innocently “oh and Tony, no stupid guillotine joke”
“Learn proper French, Tony. Stop making stupid jokes Tony. Well, just wait, Peppy Buzzkill. I will French the shit out of you!” Tony mockingly screws the screwdriver to his earpiece
“You know we all can hear you grumbling, right?” Nat raised one of her perfectly arched eyebrows in amusement
Tony just shrugs and finished screwing the earpiece and connecting it to his phone. Tapping a few buttons, he put the earpiece to his own ears and look at Nat
“Bonjour” The man winked at her
“So instead of learning, you choose to put Jarvis on your ears?”
“No, Jarvis is too advanced for that. I let him generate from online and whispered it in my ear” Tony smiles smugly
“Hey, guys” Steve approached them, wearing a tiny tee-shirt that was clearly way too small for his figure, hair still damps from his shower making Tony almost out of breath, and forgot about the French words in his ear.
“What are you doing?” Steve was clearly oblivious to Tony’s silent gaping like a fish out of the air
“Watching Tony learning French” Natasha sipped on her tea
“Oh, do you need our help? I picked up some foreign languages during the war” Steve grins showing a toothy smile that is too white and too perfect for Tony's liking
“Yeah, sure. come join us” Tony shakes his head “want some tea? Nat just brew a new batch” Tony grabs another spare cup on the table between them
“So, what’s your level in French? Advance? Beginner?” Steve sits next to Nat observing the man
“So far I can say Bonjour” Tony shrugs
“You didn’t say any word, you just repeated what Jarvis says” Nat grins
“Same thing” Tony waves dismissively “how about you pretend as the reporter and asked me a few things in English? Then I will ask Jarvis to translate it into French”
“Okay,” Steve nodded and reach for the list of questions that had already been approved by Pepper “So, Mr. Stark, Welcome to Paris, how are you enjoying your stay so far?”
“Merci beau cul, je…” Tony’s answer got cut by Natasha’s loud snorts “what?”
“’ Beaucoup’ means ‘very’, while ‘beau cul’ means ‘nice ass’” Steve gulped, feeling uneasy
“Oh… Noted. Next question”
“So, how excited are you to have the first overseas StarkExpo in Paris?”
“Je suis excité” Tony winked at Steve, unaware of how it turned Steve's face into fifty shades of red while Nat’s snorts just turn into full-blown laughter
“What? Did I say it wrong?” Tony frowns and looks at his phone for the pronunciation
“No, it’s perfect” Steve cough a little and glares at Natasha who is still laughing
“Well, Steve, are you going to help him or not?” Natasha looks at Steve with a meaningful look
Tony looked at them both in confusion “help me with what?”
Ignoring his question, she continues with a grin “How excited are you really, Tony?”
“Je suis trés excitée!” Tony exclaims, turning to the blond in front of him looking miserable
“What? Am I not saying it right?” Tony looking at the phone in confusion, keep repeating “Je suis excite” to Steve
“My ears are ringing” Steve muttered to himself, glaring at Natasha who is clearly having the time of her life tormenting Steve.
Natasha looked at Tony with an amused smirk “well, you’re not wrong” and she faced Steve again “And how about you, Cap? Are you très excité?”
If looks could kill Natasha would be dead by now.