Chapter Three
THEN.
At approximately 5:18 am on a Tuesday, Matthew Murdock understood the meaning of Hell.
A floor above the near empty hospital waiting room, he heard your heart transition from weakly beating in your chest to only quivering, the blood that was left in your veins rushing no more.
He knew you didn’t have a pulse before a single alarm made a sound.
He clasped his hands in prayer but he could not hear himself over the nurse quietly counting chest compressions, the bending and breaking of your ribs one hundred times each minute that passed.
The names of the saints eluded him as the high pitched whine of a charging defibrillator echoed in his ears and again, before anyone in the room, he knew the delivered shock to your heart had not worked.
By the time Karen and Foggy rushed into the waiting room after Matt gave himself the task of calling his friends in a futile attempt at distraction, your heart had been restarted twice, your pulse found and lost again, and now your heart did not beat nor quiver at all.
Foggy’s nervous chatter and Karen’s sitting and standing every time a nurse or doctor went by the room were no match for the ungodly sound of a human hand manually pumping a still heart in your now opened chest, giving you one last chance to fight for life.
Hell was not a fiery pit awaiting the souls of the damned and condemned.
Hell was sitting in a hardback chair, an uninvited audience member to a symphony of sounds no waiting loved one should ever have to hear.
Hell was hearing a doctor sadly ask a nurse how much time had passed since your heart stopped for the third time, driving the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen to his knees.
Hell was Foggy preventing him from crawling across the waiting room floor to get to you, to hold your hand, to let you know that if your body simply couldn’t hold on any longer that it was okay to go with his hand in yours, not alone in a room of strangers.
And then there was a sound, an impossible sound.
The joyous sound of your heart slowly but surely beating again on its own, a strong rhythm registering on the monitor against all odds, stabilizing long enough for the doctors to begin closing you up and tending to your other injuries. Matt could barely find the words to explain to his friends that you were still here when two doctors emerged from the room, discussing your injuries.
Hell was one word uttered between the two of them, a word the nurse didn’t mention on the phone, a word that stole the momentary joy of your immediate survival.
He wasn’t there.
He wasn’t there when someone left you in the middle of the street.
He wasn’t there when someone was found you.
He wasn’t there your heart stopped for the first time in the back of an ambulance.
He wasn’t there when someone did this to you.
Matthew Murdock was in Hell.
NOW.
“I don’t care how many kisses you give me Matt, I can’t stay in today and neither can you.” You said with a small giggle for the second time that morning. With a final sigh, Matt’s arm gently snaked around your waist, holding you close.
“And here I was hoping I could have you all to myself today sweetheart.”
“Nice try but you have work Mr. Murdock and I have errands to run and grocery shopping to do.”
Today would be your first day out of the apartment on your own since that night. Behind the playful morning banter and all so enticing kisses, the nerves were there for both of you in those last minutes, moving slower than usual.
“Is your phone charged?”
“Yes and I promise to call you when I leave, when I get there, and when I get home. And no, you can’t parkour across the city to make sure I get there, you have clients all morning.” You finished for him, straightening his tie.
“I can try.” Matt chuckled a little but the smile he had slowly faded, standing so still in the open doorway, unable to take a step.
“I’m right here Matty, and I’m going to be okay.” You said softly, taking his hand in and gently placing it over your heart, before putting your hand on his chest. You two stayed like that in the doorway, frozen in each other before Matt kissed you on the forehead, and left.
Right on schedule you called Matt when you left, assured him that you were okay as you walked in the sunshine, your anxiety still very much present when the odd head or two turned in your direction as you passed.
You grew up in this city and you would walk through it with your head fully held high one day even if you were hidden under a baseball cap and sunglasses for right now. The errands were easy enough, groceries for dinner, picking up some supplies for your next big work project.
Withdrawing money out of a bank account Matt had no idea about and for what Matt could never know.
“Everything okay? I’ll be home around six.” Matt said in your promised third call.
“ I’ll be home soon, I just have one last thing to check off my list. I’ll call you when I get home. “ You said, as you two exchanged quick goodbyes as he had to get back to work.
Cash in hand, your last errand was an appointment, an idea that came to you in the middle of the night.
You couldn’t get close enough to follow his whereabouts in a more efficient manner but there was someone who could.
Although everything inside you screamed to turn around rather than get someone involved in what you were doing, you lifted your hand to knock on a somewhat familiar glass door, pausing to read the name one more time.
Alias Investigations.
Surprise! I know this chapter is kind of all over the place but I wanted to update this while I had some free time :) Hope you enjoyed it!