3
“You seem distracted.”
Matt stopped spinning his beer bottle. “Hm?”
“C’mon, man, I know you heard me. You hear everything.”
“Not if I’m not paying attention.”
Foggy didn’t respond. Matt knew he was giving him the stop bullshitting me look. “Seriously, man. You’ve been quiet. Your brooding has elevated to a new level. I’m starting to get worried. Last time you were dodgy like this, you were–”
“Running around town in a devil suit, yeah, I know.”
Foggy scratched at the stubble on his chin. Based upon the sound it made as his skin brushed the hair, it was longer than usual. He must have been trying something new. Foggy was usually clean-shaven. “And you didn’t tell anyone for months.” A beat. Foggy leaned in. “Is it Fisk? Did you find something new?”
“No. He’s staying put.”
Matt hadn’t expected Fisk to sit around in prison so long. But despite his earlier movements, rumblings in the criminal underworld that he was making more connections and planning something big, he’d been more or less silent. That in itself was probably reason for concern, but because Matt couldn’t exactly roll into Ryker’s without, one, confirming any suspicions Fisk had that he was Daredevil, or two, announcing that he was still alive after Midland Circle, he was forced to sit back and wait for news.
“Okay. Then what’s got you clutching your beer like someone’s going to take it from you?”
Matt clutched everything like that nowadays. His beer, his cane, his glasses, his son. Ever since Peter came into his life Matt started treating things like they were precious, because after spending years trying to convince himself that connections were dangerous and his friends were probably better without him, he finally knew what it was like to have something he absolutely couldn’t bear losing.
Matt heard Foggy shift on his barstool and he knew his friend was getting impatient. “I’m very understanding, Matt. Like, very. I don’t always condone the things you do but I know why you do them. And I get where you’re coming from. But I can only be that awesome, amazing, understanding friend when you tell me what’s going on .”
“I know Fog, I do. I just…I can’t tell you. Not yet.” He couldn’t tell Foggy about Peter. He hadn’t talked to Jessica. Every time he told himself he’d bring it up he just didn’t. He got busy spending time with his son and gently pinching his chubby cheeks and feeling the way his meaty baby hands wrapped around things with a grip strength much too impressive for a three month old.
Three months. It had been another month since Peter’s last doctor’s visit, and two since Matt told Jessica he was alive. Matt didn’t know how he got through his days before Peter. Now that he had a child, time flew by. Peter’s developmental benchmarks became how he told time. Pete rolled over yesterday, something Doctor Wynn said not to expect for another month (unless Peter was so scared of getting a shot that his baby adrenaline forced another roll out of him. That was a one-time fluke, apparently). Jessica caught the true event on video. It’s not like Matt could watch said video, but Jessica’s narration of “Holy shit, did he just roll over? Fuck, he just rolled over!” was telling enough.
Time was moving fast, Peter was growing up, and Matt was so focused on being there for him while also restarting his legal career that he just hadn’t gotten around to asking Jessica if he could tell his friends about their son.
Foggy breathed deeply through his nose. “But there is something you’re hiding from me. And Karen.”
“You’ll know about it, Fog. Soon. I just need a some more time. This isn’t like Daredevil. I want to tell you about this. God, I want to.”
“Wow, you must mean that. You just used the Lord’s name in vain.” Matt reached over and slugged Foggy’s shoulder. Foggy chuckled and shoved him off. “Fine. Keep your secret for now. But you said you’re going to tell me eventually, and I’m holding you to that. I can’t handle another reveal like the Devil one.”
“What, you didn’t like finding me half dead in the middle of my living room?”
“That was more than half dead, buddy. More like three-fourths. Maybe even seven-eighths.”
Jessica didn’t get a lot of knocks on her door nowadays, not since emphasizing strongly to all of her contacts and referrers that she was doing business strictly over the phone and through email for the time being. If someone was determined to meet up, it happened at a public diner or a park bench. Having Peter around made her much less willing to invite strangers into her home.
One the days that she did need to go meet a client, she either asked Claire or Trish to babysit. Trish wasn’t usually available; her upscale radio show host life was apparently very demanding. Claire helped out whenever she could but Jessica knew she was overworked and exhausted and she didn’t like guilting her into watching her kid.
Matt was a new possible addition to the babysitter list, and one Jessica was still hesitant to utilize. No matter how many times he asked to come over or offered to watch Peter when Jessica needed a break, she still couldn’t bring herself to pick up the phone. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust Matt– if someone was going to watch her son, the boy’s highly combat-trained father was by no means a bad option. But calling him still felt like giving up, in a way. Sort of like she was admitting she couldn’t do it on her own.
She knew that was foolish. Peter’s father wanted to spend time with him. But swallowing her pride was one of Jessica’s least favorite and least practiced activities, and two months of sort-of-coparenting wasn’t going to immediately wipe that away.
So when someone knocked on her front door she knew she was going to need a babysitter, and she hoped it wouldn’t have to be Matt.
Through the fogged glass of her door, Jessica saw fair skin and bobbed hair. Jessica swung the door open with little fanfare and stared blankly at her sometimes-boss. “Hogarth.”
“Jessica. You haven’t answered your phone today.”
“I’ve been busy.” Busy folding burp rags and cleaning bottles. Her place was a wreck. Sometimes the undone chores got out of hand. “You don’t usually track me down at home when I ignore you.”
“I don’t have time for you to ignore me right now. I need a PI.”
“Yeah, I gathered that.”
Hogarth rolled her eyes and tried to push her way inside. Jessica managed to block her with a hand on the door. Peter was napping in her bedroom, and Jessica might seriously lose her mind if Hogarth’s clacking heels woke him up.
Plus, Jessica hadn’t exactly told the attorney she had a kid.
Hogarth didn’t ask too many questions when Jessica stopped asking for cases, and seemed to care even less when Jessica switched her tune after Peter’s birth and only asked for low-profile ones. Jessica wasn’t exactly a great employee, and even before Peter tended to disappear for weeks or months at a time. The inconsistency was to be expected.
So Hogarth being desperate enough to show up on her doorstep after one day of ghosting was…intriguing.
“Seriously. Why come all this way?”
“Please,” she said, nodding to Jessica’s arm, “Let me in. We need to talk.”
“Mmh. No. Talk here. Make it fast.”
Hogarth’s lips pulled tight like she was about to start a fight, but she conceded after a few seconds. “I’ve been hired by someone. A big spender.”
“Okay? Isn’t that, like, your whole shabang?”
“Usually, yes, But this one is trying to pay me in increments, all funds transferred from international banks.”
Hogarth didn’t always represent the nicest of people, but someone pulling money from so many places wasn’t usually doing anything legal. “So, it’s a little odd.”
“No, Jessica, you’re not understanding me. I haven’t even done anything for them yet. It’s not abnormal for a client to want me on retainer, but the amount of money they put in the trust account, it’s absurd. And the man they want me to represent…He doesn’t exist.”
Now that was something worth looking into.
Jessica peeked over her shoulder. She couldn’t quite see into her bedroom, but the apartment was silent. Peter was still asleep. She made to close the door behind her and fully step into the hall but Hogarth had apparently had enough of her antics. The bitch moved quick in her stilettos and managed to duck under her forearm and force her way inside. “Seriously, Jessica, you act like I’ve never been– what in the hell is that?”
Hogarth’s eyes were trained on the bassinet next to Jessica’s desk. It wasn’t the only baby-related thing strewn about the room, but it was definitely the most obvious. She clutched her leather tote to her chest like the idea of young children frightened her. “Would you like to tell me why you’ve switched from Private Investigation work to running an illegal daycare?”
Of course, of course, Hogarth’s obnoxiously loud voice woke Peter, the most noise-sensitive baby on the planet, and he started wailing from his crib.
“That would be the sole patron of my illegal daycare.” Deciding the jig was up, Jessica retrieved Peter from her room and brought him into the office. “Hogarth, meet Peter. Peter, meet the evil lady with knives for shoes.”
Hogarth stepped forward slowly, sort of like she was approaching the glass of a shark tank. “Jessica Jones. What did you do?”
Jessica shrugged. Peter bobbed with the movement and made a noise that sounded suspiciously close to a giggle. “Got knocked up.”
“You’re telling me that thing is yours? Good lord, Jessica, I figured all the booze and superpowers would have destroyed your reproductive system by now.”
“Did you come here to tell me I’m a sloppy whore or to ask for my help? Do you wanna figure this out or not?”
Hogarth looked like she’d rather just up and leave than do business with a baby in the room. But whatever nerves that forced her to Jessica’s apartment in the first place reared their ugly head and she, ever so slowly, took a seat on the edge of Jessica’s couch, careful to avoid the pile of clean baby onesies and socks sitting near the edge. She pulled a thin file out of her bag. “This is what I have on the client.”
Jessica switched Peter to her left arm and grabbed the file with her right, taking a seat behind her desk before flipping it open.
“I was hired by a corporation I’ve never heard of, Sloan Limited. They want me on standby to represent one James Wesley, as well as anyone else they deem in need of council. But he was their main man. You heard of him?”
Jessica shook her head. His name was on the contract, but almost nothing else. It didn’t even explain why exactly they wanted Hogarth representing him. “Is he a criminal?”
“Not that I know of. But he’s not anything else, either. I tried looking him up and aside from a public affiliation with that company, he’s got no history that I can find.”
Jessica snorted. “That’s not saying much.” She flipped to the only other page in the file, a paystub for the trust account. The multiple trust accounts Sloan was using to pay Hogarth. “Holy shit. I think they added a few too many zeroes.”
“My highest paying clients don’t even pay me that much, especially not when I’m on retainer, no services rendered. Something’s not right with this. I need you to look into it.”
“It can’t be today. I’m gonna need to hit the city archives and I can’t take Peter with me.”
Hogarth looked infinitely relieved to have said her piece, already re-closing her bag and prepping to bolt. “Why not? You don’t have one of those woven baby carriers the hippies love? Take him with you. ”
Jessica blinked. “Do I look like I own a baby carrier?”
“Well shit, Jessica, I didn’t even know you owned a baby. But fine, whatever. Find yourself a sitter for tomorrow. We need to get on this.”
“The pay better be something special.”
“You’ll be able to buy all the diapers your heart desires.”
“So, like, a week’s worth of diapers. You’ve obviously never had children, Jeri.”
“And thank god for that. Call me when you find something.”
Matt leaned his cane against his seat so he could readjust his tie. He was still reacquainting himself with business attire– after wearing nothing but sweats and t-shirts for the months after Midland Circle, it almost felt strange to be back in a collared shirt and loafers on a daily basis. Today in particular the stiff fabric was literally and figuratively rubbing him the wrong way. His nerves were shot; he was going to babysit Peter later.
In Jessica’s apartment. Alone.
Her call the night before had caught him off guard. He already had plans to come over and see Pete the next day after his morning work meeting, but Jessica said she was taking on a new case and needed some time away for research. Matt didn’t think it was possible, but she almost sounded shy when she asked if he could watch Peter on his own for a couple of hours.
He tried not to sound too excited when he agreed. This was a big step. Jessica was trusting him with their son, and he didn’t even have to beg for the chance.
He’d been psyching himself up for the experience since he rolled out of bed and was having trouble shoving his blood pressure back down in time for his meeting. Matt Murdock, Attorney at Law needed to reenter the legal world if he was going to provide for his son, and that meant reaching out to his old connections from before Midland Circle. He’d had a rather successful run doing pro bono work for Hogarth, Chao and Benowitz and figured that was as good a place as any to start.
The door to Hogarth’s office opened behind him and he turned in his seat, playing the part of a blind man trying to identify the newcomer. He had it pegged as Hogarth almost immediately; she always smelled like pen ink and Burberry perfume. “Mister Murdock, good morning.” She passed behind his seat, which was situated in front of her desk, to drop heavily into her own on the other side. “My meeting ran long and I couldn’t find a great time to pop out. I hope you haven’t been waiting too long.”
He offered a small smile. “Not at all. I completely understand.”
Hogarth got herself situated and leaned back. Matt heard her spine pop. She must have spent a lot of time hunched over files recently. “I was glad to hear from my assistant that you requested a meeting. I must say, we’ve missed having you around.”
Matt laughed. “Is that so?”
“What can I say? You closed an eleven million dollar case for a family in need before dropping off the face of the Earth. Most would say you made an impression.”
“I’m glad to hear that. I’m hoping I can utilize that impression now, actually.”
Hogarth stilled– not harshly, but as if she was giving him her attention. “Oh?”
“I’m looking to reenter the playing field. Maybe help HC&B out, lighten your workload.”
“You want me to hand you the runoff cases.”
“I wouldn’t mind a referral or two, if you’d be willing.”
Hogarth huffed. “Mr. Nelson gets the referrals. You get the ones he’s too busy for.”
“That’s okay. I’m not picky.”
“So you wanna come back pro bono?”
“I wouldn’t be opposed to the occasional paying gig, but pro bono isn’t off the table.”
“Ah. So you are picky. It’s okay to admit wanting payment for your services, Mr. Murdock. You did get the law degree, after all.” Hogarth shuffled some papers, clicked a pen and began writing something down just as her phone chimed loudly atop her desk. “Excuse me, I have to take this. I’ll be back in just a moment.”
Hogarth stepped out of her office and Matt was alone again. He tried not to listen in on her conversation; on days like today when his mind was moving a hundred miles a minute, it was hard to keep his senses in check. After he intentionally turned them on, he sometimes had trouble turning them off.
Hogarth was back in the office a couple minutes later. “So sorry, that was my PI. She always manages to call at the most inconvenient times.”
Matt tried not to outwardly laugh at the irony. He knew Jessica independently contracted with Hogarth, and Jess mentioned she was taking a new case. If the attorney sounded this exasperated, it was definitely Jessica on the other end of the phone.
“That baby of hers has her moving even slower than usual.”
Matt froze in his seat, hand gripping his cane.
“But that’s to be expected, I guess. Kids will be kids.”
He tried not to let his knuckles go white. “She’s a new mom?”
“To put it loosely.”
Hogarth knew about Peter. Jessica told her Sometimes Boss about Peter. All the while, Matt was playing it so safe that he hadn’t even told his two best friends about his son’s existence.
“Anyways. I’d be happy to have you on the payroll, Matthew. But we’re not looking to take on any new full-timers–”
Matt cleared his throat, trying and struggling to refocus himself. “O-of course. And I’m not expecting a corner office. Just for a case to be thrown my way every once in a while when you’ve got your hands too full.”
“That I think we can do.” She finished writing whatever she’d been in the middle of scrawling out when Jessica called and slid it across the desk. “Those are the phone numbers for Payroll and the Records department, call them when you get a chance so they can get your bank info. And…And you can’t read any of that. Oh my god. I’m so sorry. Let me just–”
“Please, it’s perfectly fine.” Matt felt around for the paper and folded it up before sliding it into his jacket pocket. “I’ve got some lovely seeing friends who’ll put the numbers in my phone for me. No problem at all. Thank you for your time, Miss Hogarth.”
Matt could tell she was still shaken by her own ill manners, but to him it was more amusing than anything when his blindness flustered people. A lifetime of being handed things he couldn’t look at had softened the blow of his particular condition sometimes being overlooked.
She led him back to the lobby, where Hogarth’s assistant escorted him to the elevator and sent him on his way, but not before offering to call him a cab. He waved her off with a thank you and a smile. He wanted to walk– he needed time to clear his head before he made it to Jessica’s place.
He was going to get some true alone time with his son.
His son that Hogarth knew existed, but obviously didn’t know was his.
So Jessica wasn’t putting everything on the table just yet. But she’d still shared more than he had, and he wanted to know why.
“Peter, please, don’t make this any harder than it needs to be.”
Peter just looked up at Jessica from his playmat in the middle of the office. Strictly speaking, he wasn’t doing anything particularly heinous, but the way he nailed her in place with those big brown eyes should have been a crime. Jessica spent a lot of time with Peter. A lot. She was about to leave him. Only for a few hours, just part of a day, but it killed her.
Not to mention Matt was on his way over and Jessica was sort of freaking out.
It’s not like Matt was never over. Matt came to Jessica’s to see Peter several times a week. As often as they could make it work. It wasn’t as if they were new to each other. But Matt coming to watch Peter on his own was new and that was enough for Jessica’s separation anxiety to mix with her social deficiencies and create the perfect storm of oh my god, Peter’s father is going to watch him alone for the first time.
Jessica heard a key turn in the lock and jumped. Honest to god jumped.
Right. She gave Matt a key.
Matt made a beeline straight from the front door to the middle of the office, folding his cane and setting it on the couch on his way to the floor. He sat crisscross on the hardwood next to Peter’s playmat. “Hiya, buddy.” Peter giggled so hard when Matt grabbed his toe that he fell off his hands and down onto his belly, which only made him laugh harder.
Matt twitched in Jessica’s direction, sort of like he just realized him barging in and not even saying hello might have been rude. “Hey Jessica.”
“Matt.” Babysitter now present, Jessica slipped on her jacket and wandered into the kitchen to make herself a cup of iced tea to-go. “How was the meeting?”
“Good, I think. Hogarth said she’d keep me on the list of outside help.”
Jessica paused. “You were meeting with Hogarth? ”
“Uh, yeah. Did I not mention that?”
Jessica came back to the living room. Matt was on his stomach now, even with Peter. The goofy grin he always got when he looked at the baby was plastered across his face. Matt wasn’t usually a smiley guy, but the second he got anywhere near Peter you’d think he was auditioning for a toothpaste commercial. It was endearing, the way he couldn’t keep his brooding mask in place around his son.
“No, you didn’t.”
“She was my best option. Foggy was giving me cases from HC&B before…Before everything with Midland Circle. That’s how I got yourcase, remember?”
“Oh yes, Matthew, I remember.” Jessica motioned down to where he was sprawled out on the floor. Pete was gnawing on his jacket sleeve. “Sort of hard to forget.”
She almost had her messenger bag packed when Matt cleared his throat. “I actually wanted to talk to you about that.”
“About us having sex and ending up with a kid?”
“About your case , Jessica. Hogarth in particular.”
“What about her? Did she say something unsavory about me?”
“I wouldn’t call it unsavory. But she did mention you in passing after you called. Said that that baby of yours is slowing you down.”
Jessica had almost managed to forget about her slipup. “She did seem surprised by the bassinet.”
Matt’s lips were pursed. “I sort of assumed we weren’t telling people.”
“We aren’t,” Jessica said, maybe a bit too quickly. “We weren’t. I don’t know, Matt, I didn’t mean for it to happen. She came here without telling me first and just barged in.”
“Hogarth came to you?”
“That’s what I’m saying! Since when does she do that? Whatever. I didn’t mean for her to find out about Peter. It’s the last thing I wanted, actually.”
Matt raised a placating hand. Peter’s eyes tracked it all the way up. His little mouth opened in an o , like he was just so blown away by the movement. “I’m not mad, Jessica.”
“You’re not?”
“We sort of need to talk about that. When we start telling people.”
“Well some people already know. Just, you know, as a result of being a person with friends and a child.”
“Like who?”
“Hospital and nursing staff.”
“Okay, people not covered by patient confidentiality laws.”
“Trish. And Claire.”
Matt’s eyebrows shot up. “ Claire knows?”
“What?” Jessica said, eyeing his body language. He seemed tense. “You surprised?”
“No, just–”
“Oh my god, no way. You two had a thing, didn’t you?” Jessica knew she hit the mark when Matt sat up. It wasn’t quite a scramble, he was too graceful a guy to scramble, but he was definitely poised to defend himself.
“It wasn’t even a thing, really. She…she found me in a dumpster.”
“Wow. Romantic.”
“I was almost dead. She patched me up. Did it again a few more times after that. Something almost came of it, but it was pretty much over before it began.”
“Huh. I always wondered what the connection was between you guys.”
Matt relaxed after realizing Jessica wasn’t going to pry. “What about you? How do you know her?”
She fidgeted with the strap of her bag. “Through Luke, actually.”
Matt’s head tilted in that way it did when he was listening to something. He smirked and Jessica knew she lost. “So I’m not the only person that had a thing with someone.”
“Yeah, Yeah, it’s a whole relationship square. The point is, the only people that know are Trish and Claire, if she hasn’t told Luke.”
“And now Hogarth.”
“Yes,” Jessica conceded. “And Hogarth.”
Peter switched his attention from Matt’s sleeve to his own hand. He rolled over onto his back and his devil horn beanie went crooked. Matt reached out and righted it. “It feels wrong, keeping Peter from the people we care about.”
Jessica considered that. Neither Jessica nor Matt had much family between them, but the people Jessica did still have around were covered. Her sister knew about Peter. Her friend knew about Peter. She hadn’t told her coworker-slash-friend Malcolm, but that was more of a result of him being on some sort of wellness journey out west than her wanting to hide it.
Matt, on the other hand, was implying that he hadn’t told anyone. Jessica didn’t know Matt long before Peter happened, barely days, but she knew by the horrified looks on his friends faces when he didn’t come back from Midland Circle that him, Karen, and Foggy were more than close. Family wasn’t just blood, and that trio proved it.
Jessica looked to Peter. Looked at how he reached for Matt, made grabby hands at him. He basically started glowing every time Matt walked into the room. So young, and he could already tell how much his dad loved him. If Matt could make him this happy, then Matt’s friends could only add to the circle of people in Peter’s corner.
“I think we should tell them.”
Matt’s head shot toward Jessica. His glasses were off, eyes aimed somewhere near her shoulder. He used to keep them on around her most of the time, but after Peter developed a fascination with them and snapped his last pair in half, he gave up on wearing them in the apartment.
“Not everyone,” Jessica clarified. “Just, I don’t know, I guess the main people. The ones that matter. I’m still not gung-ho on advertising it, not with my past and your stuff with Fisk. By the way, is that still a thing? Have you heard anything?”
“No, it’s been mostly quiet, Quiet for Fisk anyways. But I feel the same. There’s too much at stake to run wild with it.”
Jessica’s phone buzzed in her pocket, an alarm she set earlier reminding her that her appointment at the city archives was in twenty minutes. “Look, I’ve gotta dip. We can talk more later, yeah? I’ll call in a bit and check in.”
“We’ll be fine.” Matt scooped Peter into his lap and sat him up so he could watch Jessica walk out the door. Peter threw his feet down and bounced a little, Matt’s movement combined with the sounds of her boots zipping getting him excited. Matt waved at Jessica with one of Peter’s chunky hands. “Say bye to mom, Pete.”
“He’s three months old.”
“You can never start teaching manners too early.”
“Good lord.”
“Yes, he is.”
“Alright, that’s it, I’m leaving. Don’t do anything annoying while I’m gone.”