I’m waiting up
“Babysitting!?”
That was apparently the “very important job” The Hawkeye had asked Peter to do. The incredulous cry came from two voices, Peter Parker and Cooper Barton, while Clint leaned against the door frame of the living quarters of the Avengers and family’s rooms provided by Wakanda trying not to laugh. 4 other kids sat scattered across the room. Cassie Lang and Lila Barton sat next to each other swiping through a Wakandan holographic tablet. Nathaniel Barton was playing with some toys alongside Morgan before the girl jumped to her feet and ran at Peter the second she had laid eyes on him.
“Yes, babysitting,” Clint said with a roll of his eyes and a teasing smirk. “You three lost a child just yesterday.”
“She snuck off to see him!” Cooper defended. “It’s not our fault. And he’s here now so it’s fine.”
“Exactly.” Clint said. “Currently, he’s the only one I trust to keep you all out of trouble.”
He introduced Peter to each kid then pulled him outside to talk to him without the listening ears.
“Look, I know this isn’t what you expected,” Clint said quietly. “But after everything that’s happened, none of us feel very comfortable leaving them alone and unprotected. With all of us running around trying to fix things and put things back together and clean it all up, we can’t stay with them. I think you understand that at this point anything can happen even if the battle’s over. And who better to look after Avengers’ kids than a kid Avenger?”
“Ummm, ok? I think?” Peter said. It made “I mean I understand, Mr. Barton, Sir, and I’m happy to help, really. But you should know that I’ve never babysat a day in my life.”
Clint laughed and put a hand on Peter’s shoulder.
“Don’t sweat it, kid.” Clint said. “Cooper, Lila, and probably Cassie can help you there. Just try and keep them out of trouble and you're all set. And I promise if we need you for any Avengering, I’ll let you know.”
“Right,” Peter said, still hesitant.
“Also, they don’t know that you’re Spider-Man. But if you want to tell them they are Avengers’ kids and know how to keep a secret.”
“I think Morgan already knows,” Peter muttered quietly.
Clint laughed as they went back inside and he waved goodbye to his kids. The minute the door closed behind him Peter found himself being stared at by the 5 other kids. He had honestly no idea what they were waiting for and he had no idea what he was supposed to be doing with 5 other avenger kids in a foreign country.
“So why are you here?” The awkward silence was broken by Cassie.
“Babysitting apparently,” Peter said with a shrug. Cooper snorted.
“I mean in Wakanda,” Cassie said completely unimpressed. “I’m here because my dad is Ant-man, those three are Hawkeye’s kids and that one Is Ironman’s. So, who's your avenger Parent?”
“Uh…I’m not actually—“ Peter started to say.
“He’s my Brother!” Morgan said from where she was now perched on Peter’s hip.
“I didn’t think Ironman had a kid our age,” Cooper squinted.
“I’m not actually Mr. Stark’s son,” Peter quickly protested. “I am—was, uh His … intern?”
None of them looked like they believed him and honestly he didn’t blame them. He just didn’t exactly know how to explain who he was or his relationship to Tony Stark. Sure he could tell them he was Spider-Man, Clint was probably right they wouldn’t tell anyone. But that wouldn’t really explain how he got looped into being considered an Avenger’s kid which apparently everyone else had assumed.
“You were part of the fight weren’t you?” Lila said. “With the alien army or whatever? It would make sense. Why you were in one of the medical rooms when we got here. Why Dad seems to know you and trust you even though we’ve never met you before. So what? If you are Ironman’s intern, are you like his superhero intern? Training to be the next Ironman or something?”
“Yeah, something like that,” Peter shrugged awkwardly. “I’m Spider-Man.”
“Wait seriously!?” Cooper exclaimed. “The guy from New York with the webs and stuff? You’re like our age, right? The avengers wouldn’t recruit a kid. Believe me I tried but Dad said no.”
“It was more of a technicality,” Peter said sheepishly. “And Mr. Stark tried to bench me several times… but that never really worked. It’s not like my powers are refundable so he can’t exactly stop me.”
He moved into the room with Morgan still refusing to let go and sat on one of the armchairs awkwardly next to the girls. He really didn’t know what he was doing and was seriously hoping Pepper or one of their parents would come back soon.
“Anyways, um, What, uh, what are you doing?” Peter said, looking at the tablet in their hands.
“Oh!” Lila exclaimed. “Cassie’s catching us up on everything we’ve missed in the last five years.”
“You blipped too, didn’t you?” Cassie said. “That’s what I heard when they announced all the heroes who had vanished.”
“Blipped?” Peter asked.
“Yeah, it’s what they’ve started calling all of us who disappeared and came back.” Cooper said. “Not sure why, pretty weird name if you ask me.”
“Nobody did,” Lila said, rolling her eyes.
“Have you heard anything about what’s going on?” Peter asked.
“Aren’t you the superhero?” Cooper countered.
“I’ve been in, uh, well kind of unconscious for I’m not even sure how long? Um exactly how long have we been back?” Peter asked. “Besides it’s not like anyone ever usually tells me anything anyways. I mean, look, I’m here instead of in that Avengers meeting.”
Lila, Cooper, and Cassie gapped at him. Somehow they’d forgotten Peter had been out of commission and recovering like the other avengers seeing as he now looked perfectly fine despite looking like he had been on the brink of death when they first came to Wakanda and peeked into his hospital room trying to get a glimpse of the avengers.
“It’s been 5 days,” Cassie mumbled.
Peter stared at her in shock then grinned “5 days, huh? That’s a new record.”
“Record?” Lila asked.
“Oh I know!” Morgan chimed I’m finally looking from playing with the web shooters on Peter’s wrist. “Daddy says the longest you’ve slept before was three whole days. And now the longest is five. Daddy's gonna be so mad.”
Peter grinned again and pointed at her as if to say “see”. The older kids continued to stare at him and Nate seemed to not really bother with what the big kids were talking about.
Peter reached for the tablet and took it out of Cassie's hands. He turned over in his hands examining it.
“So none of you know what’s going on?” Peter asked.
“Population just doubled and governments are panicking. The Avengers haven’t released what happened to the public besides that they found a way to bring everyone back, there was a fight, and some Avengers are injured and that they are still counting casualties but they haven’t publically named anyone yet.” Cassie answered.
“Casualties?” Peter choked out.
“Yeah auntie Nat, trying to get one of the stones.” Lila said solemnly. “Among others.”
“According to Cassie, what’s happening now is almost exactly what happened when we, uh, first.. blipped?” Cooper said. “The world is basically a mess. They’ve got us in a tight bubble here. Wakanda seems to be the country recovering the quickest.”
“It makes it difficult when in the last five years there were essentially no borders.” Cassie said.
“What!?” Peter exclaimed.
“Yeah, the entire world basically opened up its borders, refugees hopping from one country to the next, half the world’s leaders were gone so the other half stepped up. No visas, no passports, no airport security, no border patrol,” Cassie continued. “No governments. Which also meant high crime rates. But on the bright side, resources were more easily shared between countries.”
“Now governments are scrambling to have systems put back into place that no longer exist.” Lila said.
“That’s — a lot,” Peter said before adding a moment later “Oh here it is!”
He had been messing with the tablet as they talked trying to figure it out. He flipped the tablet over and swiped the screen so holographic statistics hovered between them making it so they could all see.
“According to the census from approximately 5 years ago 57.5% percent of the population survived. Which means 42.5 percent of the population… died.” He grimaced as he said that. If he had died did that mean he was now a zombie? Honestly, what was his life? He shook his head and continued to shift through the information.
“They called you ‘vanished’,” Cassie cut in quietly.
“Vanished, right. I’m not sure that’s any better but ok,” Peter gulped and then continued reading through reports. “Rate of mortality increased almost 25% through lack of resources since then, birth rates decreased by approximately 56%. Makes sense when you wipe out half the population you wipe out chances of reproduction.”
“What’s reproduction?” Nate said.
Peter blinked at him, having been unaware that he was speaking out loud and was caught off guard. Cooper snorted.
“Yeah, Peter, what’s reproduction?” He teased.
“I’m not even getting paid to be here, ask your dad.” Peter blushed. Cooper, Lila, and Cassie laughed at him.
“It looks like the UN and Wakanda are the only currently decently functioning governments or governing systems now and are leading the charge at gathering a new census.” Peter said. “Wakanda has reported that previously 40.7% of its population vanished five years ago. Of those 40.7% they recently reported that they have found a full 100% return of that population.The UN has found that of the 42.5% of the total world population that vanished, they currently estimate a 100% return based on Wakanada’s numbers and the Avengers report but have a recorded census of 27.2% of the 42.5 returning.”
“What?” Lila and Cooper asked.
“It means they're still trying to get an account of who has returned and where they are located.” Peter explained absentmindedly.
“How’d you find this?” Cassie asked. “We’ve been trying to figure out what’s happening since we got here but nobody would tell us anything.
“Oh that wasn’t public knowledge yet. I just kinda hacked into the UN database.” Peter said sheepishly.
They all blinked at him.
“You hacked a secure network?” Cooper exclaimed. “And on Wakandan technology. You’ve been here for like two seconds.”
“It really wasn’t that hard.” He shrugged.
“Oh here it is, the statement released by the avengers.”
He clicked on the video and an image of Sam, Colonel Rhodes, Clint Barton, Queen Romanda, and King T’challa stood behind a podium.
“Two days ago, I found myself in the middle of what I remembered to be a Battlefield along with many others. Only the battlefield was no longer there. For me it felt like seconds but I was unaware that five years had passed. I was then transported into another battle field which many of you may have seen on the news at the Avengers compound.” Sam said. “I like many of you had many questions. As to what had happened and how I got there.”
“The Avengers who had survived Thanos’s initial snap five years ago recently figured out a way to undo those drastic effects. We are sorry that it took as long as it did. But each of us were missing friends and family. People who were important to us. As with most things like this we were met with opposition. Once we brought everyone back, the same army as before attempted to stop us. However, with the help of those who returned we were able to stop the enemy and would like to assure the public that this particular enemy has been defeated and Thanos is dead. The mission that we set out to do was risky and we lost friends, and fighters along the way. But it is complete. Those who were vanished have returned and are here to stay.” Rhodey said.
“At the time being, we still have fellow avengers and fighters injured and in critical condition. Once things have stabilized we will announce casualties,” Sam continued. “We ask that you remain hopeful and thank you for your continued support.”
“We recognize that many of you who have returned have found yourself in a place that is no longer familiar, for example you returned to your home, work, or school to find it occupied in some other capacity or completely abandoned. If this is the case, we ask you to make your way to the emergency displacement centers organized by the UN, Wakanda, and Stark Industries. For those who have returned in a secure location and with family. Or to family and friends who have reunited and found those in your family who have returned, we ask that you take the survey on the Stark Industries Public Relations website created by both the UN and Stark Industries and report the names of those who have returned.” T’challa added. “Eventually, representatives will be sent to the last known locations of every vanished if a report has not been made through the survey. Or the locations provided in the survey for a more accurate census.”
“We will take no further questions at this time,” Rhodey concluded.
“They didn’t tell anyone, like, anything.” Lila said in disbelief.
“It’s not like they can say what actually happened, “ Peter shrugged. “It’s enough to keep people pleased for now. Most people are going to be worried about family and friends anyways, they won’t care too much about the details.”
“Why didn’t they have Captain America make this announcement?” Cooper said. “ Why would they have the Falcon and War Machine do it? And Why was dad there if he didn’t say anything?”
“No, it's actually smart,” Peter said. “I think Mr. Wilson was one of the vanished so it would make sense to have one of them report, to show that everyone is back. Plus he is a US Veteran. So he has some credably assuming they're just ignoring the whole accords fiasco from 2016.”
“With the Snap five years ago the UN decided to abolish the accords,” Cassie added. “Tony Stark insisted on it. He blamed the accords for not allowing the Avengers to have a united front.”
“Yeah I can see that,” Peter said. “And it’s obvious why they had Colonel Rhodes speak as he is still active in both the military and avengers. They had your Dad there to represent the original avengers. Plus King T’challa who also returned and the fact that Wakanda is clearly leading the worldwide cleanup. It makes sense and it shows that united front that was missing 5 years ago.”
“Were we even supposed to watch that?” Lila asked. “Dad has kind of been refusing to tell us anything.”
“Yeah well you know as much as the public now, actually since you're here you probably know more already,” Peter said with a shrug. “Besides, my only instructions were to keep you out of trouble.”
“That’s boring.” Cooper said. “Are we supposed to be stuck here all day?”
“Can we go see the alpacas?” Morgan pleaded. “I’m Bored.”
“No! I want to see the goats!” Nate cut in.
“Sure, we can do both, just give me a second,” Peter said. “I want to see if I can— YES!”
He pressed something on the tablet and it started to ring.
“Are you calling someone right now?” Cassie said incredulously. “How’d you even do that?”
“I hacked it.” Peter said again.
“Dude,” Cooper stared at him.
“Uh hello?” A face appeared of a filipino boy with a round face.
“Dude!” Peter greeted the boy standing up.
“Dude!” the boy said. “Peter! Is that you?”
“Ned! Yes, it's me!” Peter exclaimed.
“Dude, I saw you go into space and I thought you were dead. Where were you? What's going on? I mean I saw the avengers thing and it's been like five years and no one knows anything. I literally just finished building this phone to see if I could call you but you never answered your phone! So I thought you died in space.” Ned yelled.
“Dude I did die in space! I got all dusty and it sucked man.” Peter said. “But I’m in Wakanda now. I’ll tell you more later, they got me on babysitting duty. I just wanted to make sure you were ok. And could you try to get a hold of May for me? I haven't seen her yet but Happy and Miss Potts, I mean Mrs. Stark said she was ok.”
“Dude, Wakanda?” Ned exclaimed. “I mean yeah I can totally call May, but what do you mean on babysitting duty?”
“I’m pretty sure I wasn’t actually supposed to say that but I’ll explain later! Basically there was a purple alien named Thanos and he tried to get rid of half the universe and I guess he must have succeeded. But then Mr. Stark and the avengers did something and now we’re back.” Peter said. “But the kids are getting bored so I gotta go and take them to see the goats.”
“Dude what is your life,” Ned said. “I didn’t follow any of that.”
“Honestly man, I don’t really get it either. But you’re ok right? Like you’re not hurt from, like, dying or anything?” Peter asked.
“No no, I’m fine,” Ned said. “You know how it is, you like died too, right? It was just like I blinked and woke up and five years had passed, you know?”
No. He did not know. He didn’t blink and wake up. He felt like a sculpture being slowly chipped away. And then sharp sudden pain like a million pushpins being shoved into his body at once to piece him back together.
“You— you didn’t feel anything? Like at all?” Peter said.
“No? Why did you?” Ned said with wide eyes.
Peter could feel the eyes of the Barton Kid’s and Cassie all staring at him with uncertainty too. The Barton’s must not have felt anything either.
“Nah, man,” Peter said as lightly as he could. “Just wanted to make sure it was the same for everybody. Look I really gotta go. Just wanted to make sure you were ok.”
“Yeah, for sure, man,” Ned said. He could read Peter like a book. And Peter knew that he knew he was lying. “Call me later and you can tell me everything.”
Peter hung up and turned to all five of the kids who were staring expectantly at him.
Cooper and Lila glanced at each other. They had picked up on the change of his mood when asking his friend if it had hurt. But they weren’t sure what to make of it or what to do about it. But Peter spoke up before they could say anything.
“Let’s go see some goats.”
It was Morgan who led the way. Once again, shocking Peter with her memory. She pointed them down twisting hallways and through a large wide courtyard and down a footpath on a hill. Apparently this wasn’t going to be her first time seeing the local wildlife.
“I tried to ask Mommy if we can bring one home but she said we already had an alpaca,” Morgan said as she swung on Peter’s arm. “I don’t get why we can’t have another one.”
“You have an alpaca?” Peter said.
“Lucky,” Nate said. “We live in a farmhouse but we don’t even have any animals.”
“Yeah!” Morgan said. “His name is Gerald! We’ve had him for forever.”
Peter froze in front of the field of animals they had finally reached while Morgan and the others ran off following a nice farmer that was tending the field and willing to show them around.
Peter couldn’t bring himself to move because the alpaca Morgan had just referred to had actually been Peter’s idea.
He bounded into the lab at the compound with his mask swinging in his hands and the rest of his suit covered in dirt, manure, fur and a chunk ripped out the side. But He was smiling from head to toe and bouncing like he was about to burst with excitement. To Tony Stark, the previous sole occupant of the room (and anyone else if there were to witness such a sight) he looked like a chihuahua. Or more accurately an over excited golden retriever. It didn’t help that he smelled like a wet dog too.
“Mr. Stark! You will not believe what happened to me—“ he was about to continue when Mr. Stark interrupted him.
“You fell into a petting zoo?” He said crinkling his nose.
“Yeah!” Peter said with excitement much to Tony’s surprise. “Wait did Karen tell? Oh come on!”
“No, you just smell like it,” Tony said. “You’re being completely serious with me right now?”
“Well, yeah kinda,” Peter said with a shrug and then pushed into his long tale. “I was swinging over here because Happy and Rhodey bet that I couldn’t do it. And I passed this Alpaca farm! It was so cool! I didn’t know they had alpacas in New York! Did you know there were alpacas in New York? Anyways, I stopped to say hi to them but then I guess I looked a little scary with my mask on and stuff and they ran off. The farmers got kinda mad at me so I tried to help them gather them all back up but one of them really didn’t like me and you know how everyone’s got like a fight or flight mode? Well this alpaca definitely had fight and I couldn’t hurt an innocent helpless animal—“
“Definitely not innocent if you lost a fight to it.” Tony said, raising an eyebrow.
“Mr. Staaarrrkkk,” Peter whined. “That’s mean, anyways I managed to get him back to the farm, but he kinda ate my suit.”
“You’re telling me a goat—“ Tony said.
“Alpaca,” Peter said.
“Adult. Talking.” Tony reminded him, rolling his eyes. “You’re telling me a goat ate my multimillion dollar suit.”
“Alpaca… but Yes?” Peter said.
“Then why do you look so happy?” Tony asked, incredulously.
Peter’s eyes lit up like it was finally his time to shine despite the fact that he had been holding a majority of this conversation by himself. “The farmer guy said I could have him!”
“You better have not brought a goat with an appetite for multi million dollar super suits to a facility that manufactures and holds multimillion dollar suits,” Tony glared at him.
“Oh, come on!” Peter said. “It’s not Gerald’s fault. I just scared him.”
“Gerald.” Tony said.
“Yeah that’s his name!” Peter replied.
“You did not name a suit-eating goat Gerald.” Tony said.
“Alpaca!” Peter insisted. “And yeah why not?”
Tony pushed past Peter and headed outside.
“I swear, Parker, if I find an alpaca outside, you’re fired.”
A hand grabbed Peter and pulled him forward and out of his thoughts.
“C’mon, Petey, don’t just stare, the nice man said we could pet them!” Morgan said, pulling him towards an alpaca with fluffy brown and white fur.
He let the little girl tug him along from alpaca to alpaca. He kept his eyes and ears open for the Barton kids and Cassie. He was not about to meet the fury of two avengers if he lost their kids while getting distracted by alpacas.
“Hey, Morgan?” Peter asked while squatting next to her to pet a baby alpaca she was looking at. “Your alpaca, do you know where and when your dad got him?”
Because Peter very distinctly remembered Tony making him give Gerald the alpaca back to the farmer because there was no one at the compound to take care of it and May most definitely hadn’t allowed him to smuggle into their Queen’s apartment. It was rude honestly.
“I don’t know, we’ve always had him.” Morgan shrugged.
So at least before she was born or old enough to remember then, Peter figured.
“Hey! Can I ride an alpaca, too?” Morgan said suddenly.
“No. They aren’t horses, they don’t like that,” Peter explained as gently as he could. As much as he loved the idea he did not want to play alpaca wrangler again. Then he processed exactly what she said. “Wait, did you say ’too’!?”
She nodded and pointed behind him. He whirled around to see Cooper putting Nathaniel on the back of an alpaca.
“Wait! don’t!” Peter shouted.
Which not only startled Nathaniel who was trying to gain his balance but also both the alpaca that Morgan was petting and the one Nathaniel was attempting to ride. Nathaniel tightly gripped the fur of his alpaca which did not help the situation.
Peter quickly wrapped an arm around Morgan’s stomach and pulled her up and out of the way of her alpaca kicking in her direction while simultaneously reaching out a hand and sending a web to latch onto Nate and pull him off the alpaca before it could buck him off and send him flying for a literal taste of Wakandan soil.
“Woah! That was so cool!” Cooper yelled.
Peter had to disagree. It was not cool. It set off a train reaction. The two four year olds and Alpacas started screaming. All the alpacas started running in several different directions which in turn caused Peter (still holding the two little ones), Lila, Cooper, and Cassie to start dodging rampant alpacas.
Peter turned to look at the farmer who simply glared at them.
“Not again,” Peter sighed.