Chapter 1
“I loved her so much.” Yelena whined. Clint looked forward towards her with a small nod, his features not as hard as they had been a moment ago.
“I know.” Clint responded with a small nod, still kneeling on the ice. “I miss her, too.” He nodded, and she looked down towards him, her eyes still glassy, the mascara on her eyelashes faltering for a moment with the few tears on her cheeks. She made a feeble attempt to wipe the tears from her cheeks and he looked forward towards her.
“It isn’t fair.” She shook her head quickly, looking towards him. “You got so much more time with her. It isn’t fair.” She added.
“I know.” Clint nodded, looking up towards him. His eyes were glassy. “She talked about you everyday.” He replied, his eyes looking up towards her. Yelena wore a white suit, similar to one Natasha had worn a few years ago. “She tried to find you everyday. She would’ve wanted you to know that.” He nodded, looking forward towards her, and Yelena looked down towards him. She looked down for a moment, but reached her hand down. His eyes looked into hers, but he nodded, and took her hand. She helped him stand, bruises across his face. “She wore that damn vest a lot.” Clint added, taking his arrows from the ground and she laughed under her breath, a sadder ring to it. She nodded. Natasha liked her vest more than Yelena did.
There were sounds of sirens by the streets adjacent to the skating rink, and Clint looked back towards Rockefeller Square. Kate. He remembered. “What are you going to do now?” Clint asked, looking back towards Yelena.
“I think I shall stick around a little longer.” Yelena answered, taking her baton from the ice, slipping it in the loop of her belt. “Though, thanks to you, I imagine I won’t be able to see the tree this year.” She added, and Clint smirked for a moment, but it faded after a second. He nodded. She looked back towards him as she started to walk off the rinl. “Goodbye.” He muttered the same word, and he watched her walk down fiftieth, away from the square. Clint looked around, and he passed the toy store down Rockefeller Plaza. The concrete slabs were lit up with red and blue lights of police cars… and an ambulance. Clint walked forward, and he looked at the shattered glass of one of the toy store’s windows. He passed the door as well, and his eyes took in the sight of a car crashed into one of the other windows, the front of its body hidden in the window. He slowed for a moment. There were a few drops of blood on the glass, and he sighed. Kate was fine. She was a better fighter than he gave her credit for; there were a lot of things that he didn’t give her credit for. He owed that to her. She was a real superhero now. He owed it to her to let her know that.
Eleanor. Clint realized, seeing her sitting in the back of one of the squad cars, and the officers were outside, talking to a different squadron and rounding up a few of the Tracksuits. Clint glanced around; there was an ambulance, and his eyes watched it for a moment, but it wasn’t Kate in the van, thank God. It looked like Fisk; he knew it wasn’t Kate that put him in there because his face was covered in bandages, especially by his eyes. Kate didn’t aim for the eyes. She made a point never to truly harm the Tracksuits; he was indiscriminate with where his arrows struck the Tracksuits. That was the effect of Ronin still in place. But if Fisk was already done with, where was she?
Clint looked back towards the patrol car that held Eleanor and he walked, standing beside the open window. “Where’s Kate?” He asked, looking into the car, and the woman looked back towards him, her features vindictive. It was Kate who called the cop car; Clint could see Eleanor didn’t forgive Kate for that. She held a grudge.
“I don’t know.” She replied in a cold voice, looking back towards the front of the car and Clint narrowed his eyes. He was a spy. Just as much as Natasha. He could tell when people were lying. Something changed in their features and how their eyes looked, and Eleanor was lying. She knew where Kate was.
“Where is she?” He asked, leaning forward on the window sill, his features more serious.
“Don’t know.” Eleanor replied, her features not trying so hard to hide that she was lying and Clint’s features hardened. His features flattened and he leaned back.
“You’re a horrible mother.” He replied and her features hardened, but she just responded by rolling the window up, the tint covering her features. “... shit.” He whispered under his breath, looking around, and he stepped away from the car. He looked back towards the toy store and he walked forward towards it. He tried opening through the front door, though it was a spinning door, and the glass was shattered. He forced it, and after a moment, the door revolved and he stepped into the store. The bright warm colors of Christmas lights were reduced to string lights that hung from the walls like skeletons. It was dark, and the only light came from street lamps outside and the lights of the ice skating rink. There were a few sparks that came from different lights in the building and he looked away. “Katie?” Clint called in a loud voice.
Kate always hated when he called hre that, so he did it more to tease her. “Kate.” He called in a firmer voice, and he tried the light switch on one of the walls. It turned the Christmas lights on around the store, coloring the building in dull pastels. It wasn’t as dark as before. There was the sound of something falling and Clint looked back, his eyes searching the room. There was this lead feeling inside of him. He knew to trust his instincts. It was all he had to rely on; Thor relied on his powers. Steve relied on his powers. Natasha relied on decades of training. He had a stick and a string: he relied on his instincts. And his instincts told him that he had to find her fast because something was wrong. There was a heavy feeling, like a sludge passing through his gut. Something was wrong. He heard something else fall and he looked behind him. “Katie.” He called once more, the dull Christmas lights barely lighting the toy store. He passed a giant toy soldier that stood in one of the windows, and he heard a few police following him in, but they only stood at the entrance, while he ventured deeper into the store, looking for his partner.
Finally, when there was the sound of another thing falling, he looked back, and he saw her, limping, trying to make it to the entrance. Her hand held her abdomen, where there was a cherry shade of blood. His features hardened and he ran forward. “Kate.” He exhaled, and she looked up towards him.
“Hey.” She managed, her voice a little weaker. She almost lost her balance, but his arm slipped under hers, helping her stand.
“What happened?” He asked quickly, looking down towards the blood spilling from her stomach, her hand holding the wound.
“You’re right.” She muttered, looking up towards him. “That arrow’s too dangerous.” She nodded, and he looked down towards her, his arm under hers, helping her lean up. Her head was light, most likely due to the blood loss. He looked down towards her; she winced every few seconds in pain, but the adrenaline was likely freezing her nerves, taking away a good percentage of the pain temporarily.
“I told you not to use that one.” He replied, looking down towards her, making sure her eyes were open.
“It took Fisk down.” Kate replied, her voice a little tighter with pain, and he looked down towards her.
“You took Fisk down?” He asked, and she looked up towards him for a moment with a shaky nod. “All by yourself?” He said with a raised eyebrow, and Kate nodded, but he felt her go a little lighter for a moment, and his grip was tighter, helping her stay up. Make it to the EMS outside. He ordered himself. She was bleeding a decent amount. “I don’t believe you.” He said in a teasing voice, trying to make her focus so she didn’t pass out, and Kate scoffed quietly, rolling her eyes.
“I’ve got the broken ribs to prove it.” Kate muttered under her breath, and he looked down towards her with a small, sadder smirk. Her eyes swerved half-hooded for a moment and he looked down towards her, his expression deep with worry. He nudged her gently, and she nudged him back. “Ow.”
“I don’t care, stay up with me.” He replied, and she looked towards him with a roll of her eyes, though her eyes were still half lidded.
“You need to work on your bedside manner.” Kate murmured and he almost smiled but he didn’t. “Shit. My head hurts.” She muttered, and he looked down towards her, his eyebrows furrowing together with concern. He looked up; they were still pretty deep in the store, not close enough to the exit as far as he was concerned. Not close enough to the EMS trucks, if there was more than one. He’d drag Fisk out of the ambulance he took out if there was only one out there. Kate was worth so much more.
“Hey, eyes on me.” He demanded, but she shook her head, growing limper for a moment.
“... no, I don’t feel good.” She whispered under her breath, and he looked towards her, but her eyes shut for a moment, and she went limp for a second. He reached forward to catch her as she fell forward, calling her name, but she was limper. His arm was under her shoulders, but they weren’t standing as much anymore. She was sitting, leaning against one of the giant wooden soldiers that stood in the windows, taller than Clint. Her eyes were hooded. Clint knelt beside her, nudging her.
“Hey, kid.” He called in a loud tone, but it hid how his features were more desperate. “Hey.” He nudged her again, and after a moment, her head raised from leaning on his shoulder.
“... fuck.” She murmured under her breath, her hand on her wound limper.
“Hey, language.” He called, - God, he sounded like Steve now- looking forward towards her, but even she could hear the thick worry -fear, maybe- in his voice as she came to again. “Eyes open. On me.” He said in an order, not a request.
“... I think I get an excuse this time.” She muttered, and he almost smiled, but he just looked down towards her. Kate shut her eyes for another moment, and he nudged her again, and she exhaled in pain. “Ow.” She said, her voice raising for a second, but he looked unapologetic. She nudged him back, but she could barely manage a tap; she was too tired.
“Deadly.” He replied in a teasing voice, distracting her from the growing pain in her side, where cherry red blood spilled from her flish onto the jet black, shiny floor beneath them, still stained with toy boxes and debris from the fight with Fisk. “Let me take this.” Clint nodded in a gentle voice, taking her hand from her side, and he replaced her hand with hers. His putting pressure on the wound was much more effective than her weak attempts to hold the blood back. Kate’s head was limper for a moment, leaning on his shoulder, but he just looked down towards her wound. There was a fairly sizable piece of shrapnel, born from the ‘too dangerous’ arrow, lodged in her side. It was the size of her fifth finger. There was blood coating the metal in a cherry red color. Crap. He thought, looking down towards her face, her eyes shut again. “Hey. Eyes open.” He ordered in a firm voice.
“God. You’re bossy today.” She muttered under her breath, her eyes half open now, and he rolled his eyes, trying to make it seem as if he wasn’t worried or scared. It was a feeble attempt. She could hear it in his voice; she’d known him a week now. She knew ways to get inside of that thick, vibranium armor he wore around his heart like a cage. There were things she hadn’t told him, but he didn’t need to know that, and she didn’t talk about those things to herself, either. Why would anyone care about her?
“This from the arrow?” He asked, looking down towards the scrap of metal in her side, and the blood still dripping from her side, the blood staining the prideful purple color of her uniform. Clint was pretty sure Misty hadn’t made these uniforms for blood to wash out. He’d have to ask her to make another one for Kate. He just needed to get Kate out of here. She would get out of here. Kate nodded weakly, growing tired. Her head hung forward for a moment and he called her name. “C’mon, kid, stay up. I’m not letting you bleed out on your first mission.” He shook his head, pressing his hand firmer on her wound to apply pressure, and she knitted her features together tightly in pain at the pressure.
“Ow.” She muttered and he looked down towards her with a briefly apologetic gaze, but looked back towards the exit; they were fifty feet or so into the restaurant. He didn’t want to try and carry her and make the pain even worse, or shift the metal and make it cut into an artery. That would kill her. If the metal had struck an artery, she would be dead by now; if he carried her and the metal shifted and struck an artery, she’d bleed out in his arms. He wouldn’t be able to live with that. And he wasn’t letting her die. He had to take the metal out, or get the EMS to him. And they wouldn’t hear him, not with all of the sirens outside.
“We gotta get this out.” Clint replied, and she looked forward towards him.
“... that sounds like a bad idea.” She whispered, but her voice was growing weaker, her head growing lighter. She was losing time, and he was growing more desperate.
“You know me, I’m known for my bad ideas.” He replied with a shrug, trying to cheer her up, and she smirked for a moment, but just a moment. It hurt; the adrenaline was dying down and it was being replaced with pain.
“Usually the explosive ones.” She murmured under her breath, and he smirked, looking forward towards her.
“Looks like we know where you got it from.” He replied, and the corners of her lips curled up weakly for a second, but her eyes shut again and he looked down towards her. When his hand shifted the metal for a moment, she exhaled sharply in pain, opening her eyes again.
“That hurts.” Kate whined, and he looked down towards her sadly.
“I know. I know it hurts, but we gotta get this out so I can get you to that ambulance outside.” He replied, and she looked up towards him. He was making sense. She knew he was making sense. She did not care. It hurt so much. All that her mind paid attention to was the pain, and not the logic that Clint was thinking of. “It’ll hurt for a second,” He added, looking down at her, her features still knitted tightly together in pain. “Just a second.” Clint nodded, his other arm around her shoulder, letting her sit up more so that she didn’t fall unconscious again. Her head leaned partially against his shoulder when her head grew lighter. “And y’know what? After this, I’ll endure pepperoni pizza for a month.” He nodded, looking down towards her, and she shut her eyes, her features in pain for another moment. He felt so helpless.
She loved pepperoni pizza; he absolutely hated it. But if she didn’t die right now in his arms, he would do whatever the hell she wanted. “You don’t mean that.” She whispered under her breath, cracking her eyes open, and he looked towards her with a shake of his head and a small smirk.
“Swear. And I keep my promises.” He nodded, crossing his heart, and she rolled her eyes weakly, but shut them again after a few moments. “Just… c’mon, ask me anything.” He shook his head, his hand still on her wound, keeping pressure in an attempt to slow the breathing.
“... my mom. I called a car on my mom, where’s my mom…?” She whispered, looking forward, her eyes cracking open and looking up towards him. He looked down towards her sadly. “She saw Fisk and me… why isn’t she here…?” She asked weakly, and Clint took grip of the metal shrapnel, preparing to take it out, like ripping off a band-aid.
“They’re processing her right now.” He lied; he didn’t want to tell her that her mother saw that she was hurt, but just didn’t care. So he lied; he was good at that now. He was a spy, after all.
“... I shouldn’t have called that car-”
“No.” He replied, looking down towards her. “You did the right thing.” He nodded, looking down towards her, their eyes looking into each other’s. “I’m proud of you.” He added, and her eyes were glassier for a second, but he held the piece of metal, and he removed it halfway while she was distracted. Kate yelped in pain, her eyes screwing shut in pain after he did so.
“Ow.” She yelped in a whine, her breath quick, and he looked down towards her with an apologetic glance. But it was better to have done it while she was distracted: it was like ripping a bandaid off. He tried to keep pressure, though half of the metal was still held in her side, still hurting like hell, and it was still bleeding. She felt him try to take the rest of the metal from her side, but she shook her head quickly, a tear or two falling down her cheeks. “No, no, I can’t, I can’t do this.” She shook her head quickly, and he looked down towards her, his features soft.
“I know, but you’re bleeding, kid. We’ve got to get this out so that I can get you outside to the ambulance.” Clint replied, his voice more apologetic, but she shook her head quickly, another few tears rolling down his cheeks.
“No, I’m gonna bleed out, I’m not gonna make it out there.” Kate shook her head quickly, her voice wavering.
Clint shook his head quickly. “Hey. Not gonna happen.” He shook his head, looking down towards her, seeing the few tears rolling down her cheeks, pale from the blood loss. “No Tracksuits hurt you while you were with me, right?” He asked, his eyes looking into hers with a serious expression. She looked up towards him, her features more scared, but there was something accepting in her face, and that scared him. It was almost like she knew she’d die here and she was okay with that because she brought down Fisk to do so. It would be an honorable death. He wasn’t okay with her dying here, and he wouldn’t let it happen. “You’re not gonna die here.” He shook his head; it was a swear. “I keep my promises, right?”
“... right.” She whispered under her breath and he nodded.
“Yeah.” He praised. “Where are we gonna walk the dog when we get home?” He asked abruptly and her eyes cracked open, looking up towards him.
She knew he was trying to distract her, so it wouldn’t hurt as bad -so she wouldn’t be as scared- when he took the shard of shrapnel out. “... fiftieth. By St. Patty’s Cathedral.” She murmured, and he looked down towards her with a sad smile. She knew the city like the back of her hand, almost better than he did. Only almost. “He likes all the smells of the tourists.” Kate managed, her voice a little more in pain, and he prepared to fully remove the shrapnel. She was still terrified, but less so than she would be if she knew when it was coming. “... it’s his favorite spot.” She whispered, her eyes shutting again for a moment, but he just nudged her until her eyes opened again.
“We’ll take him there when we get home.” Not ‘if.’ ‘When.’ He was getting her out of here. And then, there was another sharp pain as he took the metal from her side and Kate whimpered in pain quickly, sitting up for a moment because of the pain, but that only made it hurt more. “That’s it.” He promised, tossing the shrapnel aside and hearing it clink against the ground. “No more pain.” He promised, and she scoffed quietly under her breath, through the pain, in an attempt to make the worry on his face lessen. Even when it hurt so much, she still put him first. She was so good.
“... easy for you to say.” She said, shutting her eyes for another moment, another tear rolling down her cheek, and for a second, he smiled sadly. It was only a second. “Ow.” She exhaled, another wave of pain lacing up her spine. He held his hand over her wound, slowing the blood flow. “I hate your arrows.” She muttered under her breath as he reached down, his arms holding underneath her legs and her arms. He needed to get her to the ambulance. She had lost at least a pint or two of blood already: he could tell by the limpness in her limbs, and the tire in her eyes.
“Technically, Stark made that one.” Clint replied with a sad smile, and she nodded as he carried her in his arms. Her head leaned into his chest as she started to get more and more exhausted. “Hey, hey, stay up with me.” He replied, less of an order, more of a plea.
“I’m tired.” She complained under her breath and he looked down towards her as he walked towards the entrance of the store, his pace quick.
“Stay up with me.” He ordered, and she cracked her eyes open, her head leaning into his chest because she didn’t want to waste energy keeping her head up. “Remember; pepperoni pizza for a week.” He said, trying to keep his voice in a light tone to hide the glassy layer over his eyes. He was scared.
“... and garlic knots.” She whispered under her breath, and he looked down towards her with a curl of his lips, and he nodded quickly just as they walked into the night air.
“And garlic knots.” He swore, looking forward; some of the cop cars were gone, but not many, and there was another ambulance.
Kate knew nothing; her eyes were shut once more. It was a blur. She felt Clint’s arms around her disappear, and she cracked her eyes open. There were bright, bright lights above her and she almost winced. But the people sitting beside her in the ambulance weren’t Clint. They were paramedics in scary outfits with masks over their noses and mouths, making them seem less human. She was scared, and she raised her head, and her eyes found Clint, standing outside the ambulance, his features making it clear that he wanted so badly to be there with her, but he wasn’t family, and only family was allowed. “... wait, please… Please don’t leave me alone, I’m scared.” She managed, looking towards him, using whatever strength remained to speak. His features softened; he didn’t care if he had to fight someone to sit beside her. She was scared. He wasn’t leaving her alone.
“Okay.” He nodded. “I’m not leaving you alone.” He swore, his fingers lacing with hers, squeezing her hand gently. Kate nodded, leaning her head back on the stretcher of the ambulance. She shut her eyes again, but this time he didn’t nudge her to stay awake, just held her hand.