“What good will this do? How does father think this will help me in battle?” Loki asked Thor in an angry, but hushed tone as they both left the All-Father’s presence.
“Don't you get it, brother? He's sending women to your chambers. To –”
Loki rolled his eyes so dramatically, Thor decided not to finish.
“I don't want strange women in my room, Thor. I know that is the sort of thing you do in your spare time, but random sex with strangers does not appeal to me. It's impersonal and, to be quite honest, disgusting.”
Thor snorted. “Send them to me, then.”
It wasn't long before rumors spread all over Asgard. “Odin is hand picking maidens for the younger prince to mate with!” Your closest friend whispered as you both took your after dinner walk.
“I actually heard that he's not hand picking them. He's having his guards bring eligible women-” you started, but couldn't bring yourself to finish. The thought of all those women with Loki made you sick to your stomach.
You had developed some complicated feelings for the young prince, but you had never told anyone. It started with a book. You had been walking through the queen's garden one evening when you noticed it lying in the grass and you knew almost immediately who it belonged to.
You opened the cover just in case its owner had written a note inside, and dozens of tiny scraps of paper fell out.
“What are you doing?”
You yelped, dropping the book and whirling around to face him.
“I– I'm sorry. I thought you forgot it. I was trying to make sure it was yours before I– brought it back to you.”
Loki's face was unreadable for so long, you almost ran away, but then he grinned mischievously.
“I frightened you.”
You nodded seriously, but you couldn't help smiling back.
“Do you think they'll pick one of us?!” Your friend asked, tearing you away from your memory.
Jealousy washed over you, thick and hot and utterly miserable as you imagined listening to her gush about spending the night with Loki- your Loki.
“No. I don't.” You said harshly, eliciting a curious glance from her.
“There are thousands of eligible women in Asgard. I'm sure we will be overlooked.”
You sighed deeply.
“I must be getting home now. It's late.”
You ignored the shocked expression on her face as you stalked away, even though you knew that none of this was her fault. You just couldn't deal with any more questions at the moment. Your mind kept wandering to the next time you encountered Loki.
You'd told your friend that neither of you would be chosen because there were just so many women, but the real reason you wouldn't be chosen was far more complicated. You knew who Loki really was, and you'd promised him you would never ever tell.
It had been an accident. You were looking for a place to hide from your ex, and Loki had been trying to warm up before returning to the ball. It was unseasonably cold that night, and you remembered wishing you'd skipped the ridiculous event altogether. Going alone had been a terrible idea, especially since your ex had decided to harass you every time he saw you. So rather than continue fighting with him in public, you stealthily escaped into the palace and ran as fast as you could upstairs, not knowing where you would go. When you finally slowed down, you heard a voice from one of the empty rooms in the tower so you peered inside, curious to know who was also hiding up there.
“Get out!”
You gasped as Loki yelled in your direction. You knew he didn't actually see you. He hadn't even raised his head. But there was something…off about him.
“I—I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to snoop, I just– I was looking for somewhere to hide and–”
At the sound of your voice, Loki lifted his head slowly, revealing the brilliant blue color on his skin and the characteristic crimson eyes of a frost giant. You stifled your gasp, but he heard it anyway. His head dropped into his hands.
“Please, y/n… don't speak of this. You'd be in danger and so would I.”
The pain in his voice was so tangible, it took your breath away and you took a small step toward him.
“Loki…” You breathed, “Your secret is safe. I swear… on my life.”
You'd never been close to a frost giant before, especially since everyone in Asgard talked about how ruthless and barbaric they were. You'd imagined them to be grotesque, difficult to gaze upon. But Loki was lovely. His eyes glowed softly and his skin looked like the night sky when the moon was full. Bright and deep all at once.
“Who are you hiding from?” He whispered.
You stayed there with him, talking softly and sitting so close together that your hands brushed against each other's, then entwined almost of their own volition.
When the first maiden arrived accompanied by guards, Loki glared at Odin's men and graciously invited her inside. He knew there was no point in fighting it.
But before she could say more than the very sickening “Hello my prince” that made his skin crawl with its underlying sexual intent, he promptly sat at his desk.
“Listen…er -”
“Rosalhn,” She supplied, her voice still dripping with what he could only define as desperation.
“Rosalhn. I mean no disrespect, but this…arrangement was not my idea, and I have no intention of following through with…whatever was communicated to–”
“You don't want me?” She asked, cutting him off.
Suddenly, Loki realized that even though his intentions were pure, at least some of these women were going to be angry anyway. He sighed.
“I didn't say that. But Rosalhn, we don't even know each other. Are you telling me that you actually want to- to- have sex with me when you don't know anything about me?” His face flamed as he spoke and he cursed himself for being so damn sensitive.
She huffed, turning toward the door.
“Not anymore. You probably aren't very good at it anyway,” She muttered as she slammed the door behind her.
“That went well,” Loki sighed, vowing to make the next one feel wanted even if he wasn't going to complete the transaction.
As he lay on his back staring at his ceiling, he thought about y/n and wished, not for the first time, that he'd had the nerve to ask her for a date. But she knew. She knew what he was, and there was no way she could ever want him.
Over the next few days, you tried to distract yourself, but you couldn't help noticing the steady stream of women coming and going from Loki's chambers. Gods, he must have such stamina, you thought. Usually that kind of thought put a smile on your face, but now it made you want to scream.
“Y/n– come with us.”
Odin's guards stood on either side of you, and your heart leapt into your throat. There was no way you'd been chosen to go to Loki's chambers, so where were they taking you? You hadn't said a word about Loki's secret heritage…had he mentioned that you knew?
“Where are we going?”
Neither of them answered you, so you nervously followed them as they brought you to Loki's door.
Relief washed over you until he opened the door and you saw the expression on his face.
“No. Not her. This– this has gone too far,” he said angrily.
You tried to control your facial expressions as your heart broke into pieces inside your chest, but your eyes welled with tears anyway.
Loki looked down at you and his eyes softened even though his lips were still pressed into a hard line.
“Get lost,” he muttered, waving the guards away in irritation.
A single tear trickled down your cheek as you turned to leave, but Loki gently grasped your shoulder.
“Wait–”
“Loki, I didn't ask to be here,” You whispered, “I'm sorry I'm not what you wanted.”
The hand that grasped your shoulder slipped down your arm and gently pulled you back to face him.
“That's not what I meant when I said ‘Not her.’ Odin has been sending women here to- to-” Loki closed his eyes and took a breath, and you finished his sentence.
“To have sex with you. I know. To your credit, they've all looked very happy when they leave your chambers.”
You hadn't meant to reveal that you'd been watching his chambers so closely, and you had hoped that he wouldn't pick up on your jealous tirade, but he did.
Loki raised his eyebrows, and you saw the corner of his mouth twitch.
“Y/n, the entire kingdom is watching this madness. Every woman who leaves my room is tainted now. Everyone thinks I used them for pleasure and tossed them out, and they let me do it. Even though it didn't happen that way, their reputation is stained. I–I didn't want that for you. You deserve better.”
Loki was silent for a few moments, and you didn't know what to say, but you needed more information. You needed to know what had happened.
“It didn't happen that way?” You asked, knowing how desperate you sounded.
Loki rolled his eyes and laughed half-heartedly.
“The first one was very angry with me. She was offended when I told her that I didn't want to have random sex with a stranger. I was going to offer her dinner or something, but she insulted my abilities and left. I decided then that I would tell them before they entered my chambers that I was not playing Odin's game. Most of them came inside, had a glass of wine, and talked to me about their crush on Thor,” he admitted, grinning.
“So, you didn't want any of them?”
Loki knew that this was his chance. If he didn't take it, he would not have another with you.
“No, y/n. I didn't. I have been quite preoccupied with thoughts of another,” he said softly, his eyes locked with yours.
“Why didn't Odin send her?” You stuttered, hoping you already knew the answer.
Loki paused, reaching out to take your hands in his.
“He did.”
“W-what did you do with her?” You asked, blushing deeply.
Loki's hand slipped down to your waist and he pulled you closer- close enough that you could feel his breath on your neck. You shivered.
“I kissed her for the very first time,” he whispered just before his lips met yours. “Then we held hands and watched the sun set from my balcony.”
“Y/n, I have wanted this since that day in mother's garden. And then when you saw me in the tower, and you still sat beside me and held my hand, I think…I think I fell in love with you,” Loki admitted.
You couldn't stop the smile that spread across your face. “I think I fell in love with you that night too, Loki. Everyone else was at the ball dancing and drinking, and you were there when I needed a safe place to hide.”
You didn't see much of the sunset, but you didn't really care. You were too busy kissing your prince.