EIGHT
True to her words not a minute longer Natasha and Bucky had once again appeared on the platform and Wanda’s face lit up as she saw them as she was waiting anxiously. Her smile was gone the minute she saw their expressions and was now filled with questions and confusion for she hasn’t seen Steve appear yet.
She was on her side in a flash, “What happened, Nat? Where’s Steve, shouldn’t he be with you by now?” She asked not understanding the situation they were in. Natasha just gave her a sad smile telling her that she wasn’t ready to talk and she respected that her gaze went to Bucky and he just gave her a defeated look.
Wanda just led her back into the cabin knowing that the trip didn’t go well by the looks of it she let it go for now knowing that she’ll spill everything out when she was ready. Natasha hasn’t been herself the entire day and the worried look Bucky throws at her from time to time didn’t go unnoticed by her.
She gave her the space she needed and let her be for the entire day, but she noticed the sun was about to set she started looking for her and that’s when he saw Bucky heading to the lakeside and decided to follow him. There they found Natasha standing on the lakeshore looking at the horizon waiting for the sun to set. She could see her solemn look and couldn’t help herself but ask what happened this morning.
“Are you ready to talk about it Nat?” she just gave her a nod indicating that she had thought this through. Bucky gave out a sigh as if anticipating what she had on mind. Wanda could see the worried look in his eyes and the sadness he felt for her.
“Why was Steve not with you when you came back this morning? Did something happen? It’s not like him to just stay and not be with you.” “I mean the guy couldn’t even stay still the minute he couldn’t see you.”
“I saw him Wanda, but I didn’t have the heart to show myself to him. He’s finally getting the life he deserves and I just can’t drag him back here and deny the life he could build there.” She said solemnly. After hearing this Wanda couldn’t believe it, how could he build a life in the past without having Natasha in it? She had seen them together when they were on the run, she saw how Steve was when he was with Natasha and she can say in confidence that he would not make it without her by his side. She could tell through observation, that, and when she accidentally tapped into Steve’s mind one time, he was in a whirlwind of emotion it was a mess, the always calm and collected Steve Rogers burst out in full emotion just because he couldn’t find Natasha. It turns out she went to meet her contact in secret for the arrangements of another hideout. After that incident, Steve made sure it would never happen again and made Nat swear to tell him before she makes another move and that she always checks in, which he extended to them to cover up the moment when he lost his cool.
She was about to scold her but Bucky beat her to it. “You should’ve told him, Natalia,” Bucky uttered in frustration. “That punk was out of his mind, if you showed up in there he wouldn’t hesitate to come back with us.”
“James, I know how much you want him here and I do too trust me, but after seeing him with her I know he is happy.” She told him calmly, but they didn’t miss the hurt in her voice and that pained them as well.
“Still Natalia, If he had seen you and knew you were alive he’ll be out of there not a second longer. You haven’t seen how he was when he thought you were gone he was a hollow shell with nothing on the inside living without you was a chore that he had to do. It was like you took him with you, he died with you that day Natalia.” Hearing that from James almost made her dash to the time travel machine and drag him back with her, but that thought was immediately washed away the moment she remembered how he looked at Peggy, that look was supposed to be for her, only for her she thought to herself bitterly.
“James I’ve seen how he looked at her, he’s happy and I can’t take that away from him, and if what you say is true I can’t just show myself in front of him and take him away from the life he was building. I won’t do that to him and I’m simply honoring my word.”
Bucky released a sigh of frustration, “I still think you’re making a mistake, just letting him settle for something less.” That’s the last thing he told before retreating from them frustratingly.
Natasha was good at concealing her emotions and right now Wanda was finding it hard to read her by merely looking or observing her. She doesn’t understand Natasha’s response to the situation and why was she not listening to Bucky when she could bring him back and be with him and just be happy, live the life that they both truly deserve.
She wanted to understand her badly and this curiosity led her to Natasha’s thoughts without realizing her magic was doing it for her she tapped on her mind and there she saw the answers she was looking for. While Natasha was lost in her thoughts Wanda started wandering around it and saw Steve and Nat talking one night. The place was unfamiliar to her, but it was a room filled with screens and Natasha was sitting at the conference table with two slices of sandwiches. She took a bite and glanced at it sadly when she felt Steve’s presence in the room.
“You know you have to eat something else other than a peanut sandwich right?” he looked at her concerned while placing a plate of pasta in front of her. “Thanks.” She muttered politely and started digging in as he looked at her lovingly. “What?” she asked him teasingly when she felt his stare. “Nothing, you look beautiful eating.” He said gushingly and that brought a smile to her face.
“Steve, thank you. Not just for the food but everything. For staying here with me and helping me do all of this.” She said with full of sincerity and gratefulness and this somehow brought him comfort. “Anything for you Nat and besides it’s not like I have somewhere to be other than beside you.” He responded lovingly.
They fell into a comfortable silence as they ate when Natasha broke it. “Steve?”
“mhmm?”
“What will make you walk out of this?” She asked out of nowhere and this filled him with curiosity.
“Walk away from what?”
“From this, from me, from us?” she told him nonchalantly, but deep inside she was curious about his answer.
“hmm, probably nothing Nat, I have you and there’s nothing you would do that’ll make me walk away from us. I can’t imagine not having you in my future, I can’t make it out without you Nat. I just love you too much” He answered her confidently, but also got curious. “How about you Nat, what will make you walk away from us? And you be honest with me.” He asked her teasingly.
“You know I’m always honest with you Steve and even if I’m not being truthful I think we both know each other so well that we could catch up on those lies.” She smiled at him and that caught Steve off guard, her seriousness got him all worked up, and couldn’t wait for her response.
“So to answer your question which, is mine by the way. I think I’ll walk out on us the moment you stop loving me, or the moment you’ll stop needing me when being with me doesn’t make you happy anymore.” She said smiling at him genuinely. “I just have to give that respect to you and myself. I don’t want to force you or obligate you to be with me when you don’t want me in your life anymore.” She stated wholeheartedly and he was slightly taken aback by this, but recovered quickly and glanced at her full of love and gathered her in his arms. “Well, I guess that won’t be happening then, because I will always want you in my life, Nat. I want you and I want you with me for the rest of my life that is if you’ll have me,” he told her with full of sincerity and honesty which warmed her heart and made it skip a beat like he always does in every little thing he does for her. “Then I guess you’re stuck with me, Rogers.” She added teasingly making the whole situation a lot lighter Steve tightened his embrace and they stayed in each other’s arms for the rest of the night until she let exhaustion engulf her while remaining in his safe embrace.
When Wanda was out of the trance witnessing that whole conversation between Nat and Steve, she felt guilty like she just invaded an intimate conversation between the two. She looked at Natasha who was still lost in her thoughts and called out for her.
“Nat, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it, I was curious and I didn’t know my power started taking me in your thoughts and I accidentally witnessed your thoughts.” She said apologetically and Natasha just looked at her and smiled at her sadly.
“It’s fine Wanda, I guess now you finally understand my decision.”
“I do Nat, but I guess there’s more to it, is there?”
She just nodded, and Wanda understood that she wasn’t ready to share the other reason for her decision and respect that. She knows that she’ll tell her once she was ready and when the time comes she will be there for her, right by her side.
She gathered Natasha in her comforting embrace and stayed by her side witnessing the beautiful sunset by the lake.