Fractured

After that night, there was a change and all in all, things seemed to start settling into something positive. The raids on Hydra bases had been numerous and gave the team multiple chances to grow as a unit and learn to work together. In the field they could see more of how the rest of the team could handle themselves and their strengths as well as their weaknesses. It was a great way to also learn how Bucky operated as his fighting style was slightly different from Steve’s. But it also created the best bonding environment as after another successful fight they would sit around the tower, laughing and eating as they recalled moments from the fight together. A habit that Thor had insisted upon, as it was custom in Asgard and the team had adopted it rather easily. It was a nice change from everything. Each had been one their own in one way or another, but now they had others to rely on.

And none was more evident than the friendship that was born between Tony and Clint. The deal they had both made had been honored…for the most part. It had it’s moments where it was tested and there were times that one party may have overstepped, if only a bit. Clint had caught Tony in a good mood, which wasn’t exactly all that strange, except for when Tony suggested they build a slide from the top of the tower to the bottom for easier exiting. Then Clint smelled the vodka on his breath and locked Tony in his room before hiding all the alcohol from his bar. On the other Tony had noticed how Clint hadn’t slept for three days and drugged his coffee so he would finally get some rest. Neither side had been happy with what the other had done but the smug look on both sides had reminded them that they were just looking out for one another.

Overall, everything was well.

Until Ultron.

It started with the raid that finally led to the location of the scepter. Despite being thrown off his feet by some cocky kid and blasted in the side with new Hydra technology, they had managed to retrieve the damn thing back. A final victory over Hydra and stopping the creation of new, deadlier weapons. Thanks to Dr. Cho, Clint had healed up to 100% and the time to celebrate was finally there. It was a whole party with trusted former SHIELD agents, friends and potential new teammates in the midst. But in the end, the original team remained. And Clint had to say, he was rather proud of how Tony seemed to limit himself. The man had been babying his drink all night. Maybe…just maybe things could start going in their direction.

Except for the army of robots that attacked and Tony and Bruce’s new pet project was brought to light.

Ultron.

And it kept getting more and complicated. The speedster had a twin sister who had messed up the team badly with her weird magic (Clint hated magic) and now with Hulk having rampaged and caused chaos thanks to her, the Avengers needed to get off the grid. Fortunately for them, Clint knew a place.

But damn was he terrified about revealing it to the team. Most importantly, though, he worried about how this would change things for his family.

After this they wouldn’t be able to remain anonymous. Something he had worked so hard to do since he and Laura got married. There had only been four people at the official wedding – Natasha, Fury, Coulson and Hill. The rest of SHIELD hadn’t known. There wasn’t even an official file on any of this. For all intents and purposes, Clint was a bachelor and Laura had retired from SHIELD after a mission had left her nearly compromised. And it had worked. Clint never worried about anyone finding out about her or Cooper or Lila. Their survival required him to be able to keep them hidden from the world with no trackable record back to him.

And while he didn’t think that with the Avengers finding out about them would put them in any immediate danger, he still worried about what this meant. More people knowing meant more opportunities for potential mistakes or slips. He could get too comfortable talking about them and not realizing who or what may be listening. And the Avengers were sure to make more enemies, especially powerful ones. Clint was lucky he managed to keep his family hidden from Loki. It had drained him, to get sure, but he never slipped.

He didn’t know what he would have done if he had told the god about them.

As He landed the quinjet in the field outside of his farmhouse, Clint could feel his heart beating against his rib cage like it was about to jump out at any moment. This was it. There was no going back. He had to trust his team that they would keep this secret for him. He didn't say a word to any of the Avengers except for Natasha as he helped her up the stairs and through the front door. He could feel the confusion falling off of them but She knew that all would become clear in a matter of moments. Especially when he called out to Laura she emerged from the kitchen. And of course his voice calling for his wife drew the attention of his two kids who came barely down the stairs and nearly tackled him to the ground. In a way, Tony was right. Laura had been a SHIELD agent but she wasn't anymore. Now she was just Laura Barton. His wife. His world.

The dumbfounded faces on his team were definitely a sight to revel in but he was glad that when he asked for them to keep it off the record and on the down low they seemed to understand. Lila was already trying to pull Natasha away for aunt-niece bonding time and Cooper wanted to show Tony his science project he was working on while Bruce and Bucky got better acquainted with the misses. Overall, it went better than he expected. He was finally able to pull Laura away after showing the team around and letting them get comfortable. She had been worried when he told her about his run-in in Sokovia and wanted to prove to her that he was okay. “See, you can’t really tell the difference.”

Laura still gave him a skeptical glance, but he couldn’t blame her – he had often lied about how fine he was on many missions they had shared together. She knew exactly how he could be and looking at him now, she was already seeing something else that she knew of him too well. The worry he had about his team. He had said so himself – they took a big hit. That’s why they were all there now. “They need you. You look out for them. But who’s looking out for you?”

Clint’s thoughts went to Tony and Natasha. The two were the biggest riders of him, making sure he was taking care of himself while he worried about everyone else. He smiled gently as he stood up and placed a kiss on Laura’s forehead. “You should use Bucky’s strength while he’s here to move that stuff around for you.”

“You mean the stuff you promised to move the last time you were here?”

Clint chuckled as he pulled her closer. “Yeah, well, I’m a little preoccupied at the moment.”

Laura laughed as she shook her head. “You got a team to take care of right now, Clint.”

She put a kiss to his lips before pulling away and heading down the stairs to take care of dinner. Clint, meanwhile, found himself wandering outside and being overrun by his two kids with Natasha and Tony not far behind. “Dad, Mr. Stark said he could make me a jetpack!” Cooper announced rather excitedly.

“He did?” Clint asked, eyeing Tony and noticing the sheepish look on the man’s face. “Maybe when you’re older. Why don’t you two go help Momma with getting things ready for dinner, ‘kay?”

He squished them and kissed their cheeks before pushing them towards the house. “I can’t believe how big they’ve gotten,” Natasha smirked as she crossed her arms, “Last I saw Lila she was still clinging to your calf.”

“Yeah, well, they grow up so fast,” he muttered, maybe a bit more sadly than he wanted. He had missed so many milestones already because of SHIELD and now the Avengers, but he wanted to make the world a safer place for them.

“So…this was the classified location you had been relegated to?” Tony asked.

“Emphasis on the classified,” Natasha added as she nudged Tony.

“Oh don’t worry, I don’t think anyone would believe me if I told them. You know, Barton, I could make them their own wing…”

“No,” Clint cut off rather quickly. Tony looked at him perplexed as Clint cleared his throat. “I appreciate the offer, Tony. I do, but this is the safest place for them. Off the grid and away from prying eyes.”

He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and he reached in, wondering who it was texting him. It was Laura. Fury had reached out to her and was on his way but didn’t want the rest of the team to know. This is really turning out to be a party. “I need to take care of some things,” he excused himself.

Tony and Natasha had let him go but they could both see in his shoulders that there was something still tugging at him. “You think he would seem a bit more relaxed now that he’s home,” Tony commented, turning to Natasha.

“He’s worried,” she explained. She had seen him like this multiple times over the years they had worked together. “You have to understand that this took a lot of courage. He’s incredibly protective of Laura and the kids. With the amount of enemies he alone has made, he can’t afford for anyone to find out about them.”

Tony watched as Clint scooped Lila up from the ground and carried her back inside when she had run to grab him. He thought about his own dad, a founder of SHIELD and how he struggled keeping up a family while serving his country. Not well, but he tried. “I don’t know how he can do it.”

“It takes a lot of sacrifice,” Natasha added, “He almost missed Cooper’s birth because we were in mission. He tries to be home as much as he can, but the world doesn’t stop.”

“Why doesn’t he just step down and retire?”

“He does this for them, Tony. Taking care of threats, saving the world…it’s so when they grow up the world will be a better place.” Tony gave her a look and she just grinned smugly. “I asked him the same thing. It was right after Lila was born. The idiot thought taking a bullet for me was a good idea. I told him he should stop being reckless and he has a family to think about. Clint is many things. Stubborn, fearless and devoted. Especially to them. He told me he’ll do whatever it takes to make sure that they can live in a world where they don’t have to look over their shoulders like he did when he was growing up.”

It made sense in Tony’s head and explained a lot about why his own father decided to spend more time in his lab building things for SHIELD than with him. Protectors until the end. “It’s a wonder how you and him didn’t wind up building this farmhouse together,” Tony commented in a teasing tone.

“Yeah, well, Clint’s not really my type.”

“And what is?”

“You’re the genius, Tony,” Natasha smirked as she nudged him, “You figure it out.”

Tony watched her with curiosity as she gave him another passive smile before heading into the house. He was about to follow when Laura had asked if he wouldn’t mind looking at their old tractor in the barn. “Yeah, I’ll take a gander at it.”

And when he walked in and found Nick Fury waiting for him instead, Tony was quite sure that Laura had to have been some sort of SHIELD agent. Only someone with spy-level skills could pull off a stunt like that. It looked like their moment of rest was not going to last long in the slightest. He understood why Nick wanted to talk to him first – after all, Ultron was around because of him. Sure, Bruce had a hand in it too, but Ultron had been Tony’s brain baby. It was his project that was threatening to destroy the world. And that little witch’s mind games on him had thrown him for a loop, to be sure, but he was able to distract his yearnings with the plans and the missions to try and stop Ultron. But as he stood there talking to Fury he could feel his hands shake. That pain in his body yearning to be numbed. That voice in the back of his head reminding him that this was all his fault. He had shoved his hands into his pockets as they entered the farmhouse and he tried to distract himself with darts. Why he thought it was a good idea to play darts with the greatest marksman in the world, he would never know. But as the team and Fury spoke he noticed something.

Clint, watching his hands as he pulled the darts from the board.

Shit.

Fury was starting what they could only assume was some Captain America-level pep talk when Clint had pulled Tony aside. “You good, man?”

“Yeah, I’m fantastic. You know, the world has a new threat from some genocidal artificial intelligence that I gave birth to, but other than that, I’m great. What about you?”

Clint didn’t respond. He just glared at him with a knowing gaze. “Your poor kids. If that’s the look you give them when they’re in trouble…”

“Tony…”

“You know, I’m starting to see it more and more. How did I not put two and two together…”

“Tony…”

“I mean the looks, the protectiveness, the giving a damn about lost causes….”

“You really like avoiding talking about things by talking about anything else, don’t you?”

“Was that your spy powers or your dad powers activating there?”

Clint just rolled his eyes and shook his head. “You’re hands are shaking and you’re sweating. I know detox when I see it.”

Tony hadn’t even realized he was sweating until he felt how the shirt he was borrowing from Clint was starting to feel a little heavier. “How long?”

“How long what?”

“How long has it been since you took a drink?”

Tony took a moment to think about it. “Probably…a week ago?”

Clint’s face turned to that of bewilderment. “I thought you had a drink at the party the other night.”

“Sparkling cider. I was trying to keep up appearances.”

Now Clint was definitely impressed. He for sure thought it was champagne. “You know if you need to sit out for a bit longer the rest of the team can take care of this.”

Tony shook his head. “Ultron is my responsibility. I brought him into this world. I need to take him out.”

Clint was studying Tony. “That’s why your body is craving it, isn’t it? You’re blaming yourself.”

“What? No!” Clint just shot Tony a knowing look. “That’s right, I forget. You and Natasha work together. She gave you all her secrets on reading people. Alright, fine. Yes. I blame myself. I wanted to stop another New York from happening but instead, I caused it. There. Satisfied?”

“No,” Clint replied, making Tony slightly confused, “Because you shouldn’t blame yourself. You were just trying to do what you do best – invent something to keep the world safe. You built your suit. You built War Machine…”

“Technically Rhodey stole that from me…”

“Regardless,” Clint cut off, “Ultron was an accident and even geniuses like yourself are not perfect. We’re going to stop him. And when we do you we can all look back on this and laugh and use it as a means to poke fun at you.”

Tony groaned as Clint smirked. “Just don’t tell Rogers. I don’t want to hear a lecture from him about this.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it, pal,” Clint smirked as he nodded back to the kitchen. “Let’s go take down this son of a bitch.”

“You know, you should really watch your language with your kids around.”

Clint laughed as he patted Tony on the shoulder and pulled him back to the team.

It was time to go to work.

TBC…