Keep the Faith
The one where Thor and Loki talk and Loki is disappointed in the fact that Thor is no longer an idiot.
“How do you do it, Thor?” Loki asked before he could stop himself.
“Do what?”
“Trust me? After all the times that I betrayed you, why would you still?”
“Loki, I don’t.”
For a second it felt like someone had stabbed him through the heart and twisted the blade. It was fair, he knew. But he never thought that Thor would say it out loud, even if it was nothing short of what he deserved. He was given Thor's trust as many times as he had betrayed it. Every single time they seemed to have resolved things, Loki would find a way to get them back where they were before. Loki had convinced himself a long time ago that it was in his nature to betray. God of Mischief with Jotun blood. Nobody would expect him to be anything more than a backstabber and a trickster. But somewhere deeper than his thoughts he knew that it was nothing but fear that led him to hurt Thor over and over and over again. He was scared to be hated for being who he was (what he was), so it seemed better to just give people a reason. Yes, they hated him, but only for his actions. It didn't hurt that much. Everytime he felt the slightest bit of regret, he found some comfort in that.
Loki realized that they had been quiet for some time.
“It seems, you are no longer the fool that I took you for.” He said.
“It seems not.” Loki could hear the hurt in that. (You did that!) He tried to push it away.
Loki felt he was tearing up. He couldn't get himself to look at Thor right now. He knew that in his eyes he could see every chance that he got and every chance that he wasted. He couldn't afford to think about all the times that they could have been brothers but were nothing more than strangers, because of him. And as always, when he didn't know what to do, he walked away. (Pathetic).
“Loki,” Thor said. Loki froze in the doorway but didn't turn around. It took him a couple of seconds to say yes without making it sound like a sob. He hoped that Thor didn’t hear the slight tremble in his voice.
“I may not trust you, but I need you to know, I'll always have faith in you, brother.”
Loki wanted to look Thor in the eye to see if he could find something that said he was lying. But he couldn't make himself turn around and he knew Thor was telling him nothing but the truth. Besides that, he was afraid he would break. He held his tears back for another second, and nodded only slightly. He walked (ran, escaped) to his room where he sat down on the bed.
“Faith, huh?” He murmured under his breath. He wanted to prove to Thor that he at least deserved that faith, if only it weren't so easy to betray. If only lying were hard.
He poured himself a glass of wine but ended up drinking the whole bottle. He really didn't want to feel anything tonight.