Kindred Spirits

Charles stretched his arms out along the sheets, pressing his face into his pillow and letting Erik run his hand up and down his back, from the tip of his spine down to the scars at his tailbone where the sensation stopped. The sensation was different than before, stronger, sending little shockwaves across his skin that made Charles’ fingers curl into the mattress. 

Charles swallowed at the idea, because if this caress did that much, he could only imagine what would happen if Erik was a little firmer or if he used his tongue — 

He wasn’t supposed to think about those things anymore. He didn’t have the right, and

 — And Charles forgot his next recrimination in the face of Erik’s nipping the shell of his ear, a raspy moan slipping free instead. Apparently, he was more sensitive there as well. 

Charles filed away the information for later. Then he reminded himself there was not going to be one. It was more difficult now that his emotions were on the surface, refusing to go behind his blocks and shields. 

Charles was unmoored, his emotions coming back to him with far too much potency. They left him exhausted. His grief and his guilt weighed him down.

 Hope shined through too though. Affection for his students and relief that Erik and Raven were home. 

Those emotions only made his guilt worse. Charles did not want a reprieve from his suffering. Not when a good portion of his staff was dead and others missing. All because of his arrogance.

Erik ran a soothing hand down his flank, his lips stilling against his neck. He projected protection and safety, keeping him in the present. Charles opened his eyes, scrunching his face up when he was met with sunlight. He must have slept through the afternoon and the night after, his body giving out on him after weeks of Charles numbing his needs with his powers and alcohol.

He huffed and propped himself up on his elbows. Erik took the unspoken cue and pulled away. He sighed and turned himself over gracefully — and who ever imagined he might be graceful — and glared at Erik without any real heat. 

Erik answered him with a brilliant smile, pressing one hand against his cheek. Charles sensed his hope, and could not imagine why Erik felt any. Charles was coming undone, after all. “It’s Friday, we’ll have the entire weekend to prepare.”

“Prepare for what?” Charles wrinkled his nose as he rolled his wrists a few times. He tried to focus on those repetitive movements, on the stiff sheets brushing against his skin. Anything but the emotions bubbling under his skin, the guilt churning in his stomach, or worse, the longing in his chest.

“Your classes. It’s been over a month. The children are getting unruly.” Erik pressed his mouth into a thin line, staring at Charles far too intently for so early in the morning. Charles swallowed tightly, shaking his head minutely and balling his hands into the sheets. The guilt and contempt for himself overrode the affection and longing from before. His breath caught in his throat. No. No, he could never teach again. He had no answers for his students, no wisdom to share, except his regrets. No. 

“Erik, you know I can’t.” Charles whispered, his words choked off and ugly. Tears built in the back of his eyes. He blinked a few times, rubbing his face with the back of his hand. He needed to banish the tears before Erik caught sight of them.

 Erik leaned over and tugged his hand away from his face, resting them against his side instead. 

“You won’t, which isn’t the same at all.” Erik corrected him as he lifted his chin up with two fingers, so he was forced to meet his gaze. Charles made a hiccuping noise in the back of his throat, ugly and small. Erik brought a hand up, brushing the tears from under his eyes, his thumb lingering along his eyelashes. Charles allowed himself to lean into the touch, and Erik did not pull away until the tears stopped and his breathing evened out. “We both know you can’t let Sean teach reading indefinitely, and plenty of the older students need a more deft hand than Alex.”

“Hank’s hand is plenty deft.” Charles flicked his gaze down toward the sheets, a small smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. 

Erik stared at him flatly, letting go of his chin and shifting so they were side by side rather than pressed up against one another. 

Charles let out an exasperated sigh and pushed himself upright. He leaned against the headboard and closed his eyes. 

Erik was not going to let this go anymore than he did anything else. Charles might as well be comfortable while he made his point. 

“He already has his own classes and a lab to run. Besides, you’re setting a bad precedent for the children.” Erik waved a hand through the air dismissively. He twisted around so he was sitting cross-legged on the bed, his grin far too bright for so early in the morning. Charles scoffed inelegantly, giving Erik a dull stare, his shame burning in his veins and sliding up his throat, until his lips were coated in ash. 

‘I did that far more before, if you’ll recall. And –” Charles was cut off by Erik kissing him passionately, mouth resolute against his own, as though trying to erase the soot in his mind. Erik's every movement against his lips was filled with affection and concern. Erik slid an arm around his waist, his palm pressing against his hip, holding him steady both physically and mentally. Charles sighed against his mouth, his shame easing into a more manageable state. It no longer overwhelmed his senses. 

He broke the kiss and glanced up at Erik. He scowled a little, though his gaze projected gratitude. “You can’t just kiss me every time I say something you don’t like.”

“I don’t know, so far I’ve had more success with that method than anything else I’ve tried.” Erik murmured with an unapologetic roll of his shoulders, shifting a bit so they were facing each other again, without ever letting go of Charles’ waist. “We do need to talk though.”

“I … I don’t want to go back to who I was before.” Charles said softly, not sure if Erik would understand, and also sure he would better than anyone else ever would. He shivered as he glanced down at his hands, taking in the calluses on his fingers and his strong palms, the only change in him which was still apparent. 

When Charles glanced in the mirror, he saw the healthy glow in his cheeks and the brightness of his gaze, the 15 hours of sleep finally defeating the dullness which had defined his complexion over the past few months. Charles despised the breadth of his shoulders, the angle of his cheekbones, whatever sharpness he had gained traded for his old softness. He did not want to be soft anymore. “Every time I glance in the mirror and I look a little healthier, or something one of the students says makes me laugh, I feel so guilty.”

“You did nothing wrong.” Erik said in a harsh voice as he slid a hand under his jaw, his grip firm but with an underlying tenderness. Charles’ gaze darted across the room, wanting to shrink away from the weight of Erik’s expression. He did not deserve such faith anymore. Still, he found his gaze meeting Erik’s own as he let go of his jaw. He wanted to believe him. “You are not the one who made them suffer, who took away their freedom. You did not kill them. That was the human government.”

Charles bit the inside of his lip, bringing one up to rest it against Erik’s cheek, his fingers curling around his jaw. He gave him a helpless little smile, surging forward, so he ended up half collapsed against Erik. He pressed his face into the crook of his shoulder, his words muffled against his skin. “If they had not listened to me, they would –”

“Never have found peace or done the work they clearly cherished, even if it was only for a few months.” Erik brushed a hand through his hair and down to the nape of his neck, his thumb making circular motions, soothing and protectiveness. Charles closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths, the last of his tears fading in the face of Erik’s devotion. His mind was a beacon, his faith and his love a light guiding him out of the darkness of his mind, the grief and the pain. Charles lifted his head from Erik’s shoulder, glancing up at him with a hesitant smile. Erik pressed his thumb against his bottom lip, his gaze sure. “The best way to honor their memory is to keep working toward the future we want, together.”

“Even though we don’t have the same methods?” Charles asked dryly, raising an eyebrow. They worked together before, and everything fell apart before they got anywhere near the future. He gave Erik a crooked smile, tilting his head to the right as he slid further down the headboard, his pillow growing more and more enticing with each passing second. “I want a school, Erik, not an army.”

“How lucky then we can have both.” Erik said as he wrapped an arm around his waist, shifting them both so they were lying down again. Charles had several arguments about why they could not, but he couldn’t remember any of the good ones right now. 

Besides, exhaustion was overcoming him again, his eyelids growing heavy the more Erik’s solid weight was pressed up against him. 

Charles let himself drift off to sleep, the warmth of Erik’s breath and the hues of other people’s dreams lulling him to sleep. 

Erik kept vigil while Charles slept, the anguish gone from his face, the tension seeping out a little more with each passing second. He was tempted to let Charles spend the rest of the day in bed, if it would keep him like this, content and safe. 

But Erik knew Charles needed food and fresh air as much as he did sleep, especially after weeks of trying to replace both with whiskey and Cerebro. Besides, the nightmares would come eventually. 

Almost as if on cue, Charles shuddered in his sleep, his face scrunching up as he formed a fist around the air. His mouth trembled and fear engulfed them both. That would not do at all.

Erik brushed a hand along Charles’ face, tracing the sharp line of his jaw with his thumb, hoping it would be enough to wake him up. Charles leaned into his touch, making a whimpering sound and scrunching up his nose. He shifted so he was curled further into Erik’s shoulder, and he let out a low sigh. Then he flicked Charles on the nose, smiling when he huffed, blinking a few times and curling further into his pillow. 

Erik rolled his eyes and sat up further, so Charles had to roll off of him, finally sitting up with a small scowl. Erik grinned back at him, letting his fond irritation wash over him. He always enjoyed how grumpy Charles was in the morning, the complete opposite of his usual good humor or even the frightening blankness of the past few weeks. Charles smacked him lightly with a pillow, sluggishly pulling himself upright. He pressed a quick kiss to Erik’s cheek. Then transferred himself over from the bed to his chair. I’m going to take a shower, but meet me in the garden after?

Of course. Erik did not move from the bed, his gaze locked onto Charles until the bathroom door shut behind him. 

Erik slipped out of bed then, crossing the room and over to the dresser. He tugged on some jeans and a polo. He needed to find them some breakfast, and a quiet spot outside. He wanted more time alone with Charles before he went back to being the professor and him the general. 

Erik sauntered into the kitchen, relieved to find it empty for the moment. He was not sure he could handle any questions or chattering students at the moment. Erik made them some toast and scrambled eggs, humming softly to himself. He was enjoying the quiet domesticity he once believed impossible for the two of them. 

Erik sensed Charles' mind brush up against his own, and smiled softly to himself. You can do the dishes. 

Erik made his way to the garden, to the same spot they had sat the day before, when Charles finally let himself come apart at the seams. He brushed his fingers along the edge of the bench, the stone cool beneath his fingertips. His gaze caught on a piece of iron which had come loose from the bench. It slowly rose up from the ground, spreading out and becoming a makeshift table. 

A breeze passed by and Erik shivered, wondering if it might be too cold to eat outside. Autumn was quickly giving way to winter, and he had not brought his coat or reminded Charles to wear one. 

Then Charles was in front of him, his eyes bright and lips chapped from the chill in the air, holding two mugs out toward him, and Erik forgot to mind the breeze. 

He gave Erik a small smile, gaze nervous but hopeful as he set the red mug down on the table. The scent of coffee rose up from it and permeated the air around them. Erik waved his hand, and the coffee slid across the table until the mug came to a stop by his hand, steam still rising from the top. 

Charles reached for his own tea, biting the inside of his lip as he caught Erik’s gaze with a warily optimistic one of his own. “So, what do we do now? How do your goals and mine ever align enough for you to stay?”

“We have the same goal. We just have different means.” Erik insisted as he teached for his free hand, staring at Charles in open bemusement. He had not expected Charles to be focused on the future already, but maybe he should have been. 

Charles was a planner at heart, carefully considering every possibility until he found one he liked, or at least one he could live with. 

Erik pressed his mouth into a thin line, gaze sharp and considering. The problem, of course, was that Charles did not consider every possibility. He trusted people too easily, offered compassion when it was undeserved. 

But that was before everything fell apart twice over, and maybe new possibilities had made themself visible to Charles now. “Though I hope recent events have made you more open to mine.” 

“I still believe humanity is better than their worst instincts.” Charles told him in a firm voice, holding his gaze with a steady one of his own. He set his tea down and reached a hand out, clasping Erik’s own across the table. 

He smiled crookedly, his gaze sharper and a little less kind than it might have been once. “But I’ll admit I can’t say the same for their governments. I won’t stop you from protecting us, as long as you don’t put my students in danger.”

Erik returned his smile with a relieved one of his own, some of the knots in his stomach coming undone. It was a start, if nothing else. Charles might still have more faith in humanity than Erik, and he likely always would. His hope was too strong to ever be completely destroyed. 

But he was willing to work alongside Erik and his Brotherhood, to let them fight while he pursued his goals. Erik suspected Charles would have his limits, lines he was not willing to cross. But they wanted the same future, where mutants were safe and free to live without fear or persecution. 

That was always true. Everything else was secondary. Methods could be debated and changed, lines changed, as long their values aligned. Erik leaned over and pressed his thumb against his bottom lip, his gaze intent. “And if they want to join my side of things, when they're old enough?”

“I can’t stop them, I can only try to steer them away from violence.” Charles shrugged carelessly, his words airy, in sharp contrast to the severity of his gaze. Erik grinned in spite of himself, at the confidence of Charles’ mind and his faith he could show them a better path, that there still was one to follow. Erik knew that same confidence would create conflict between them in the future, but he still preferred it to a Charles who did not argue with him at every turn. 

Charles grinned at the thought, his own mind glowing with warmth. He grasped Erik’s hand a little tighter than before, lacing their fingers together. 

“Until violence becomes necessary.” Erik added before he could stop himself, and Charles rolled his eyes at him, gaze flat. a flicker of fond annoyance passed between them. It was all so familiar, and Erik could not help but smile, the last of the knots coming loose. Charles would be alright, and they would be together. “We have the rest of our lives to convince each other. We have more immediate problems to focus on.”

“Such as which classes you’re going to be taking over? Charles asked as he cocked his head to the right. A small smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. Erik shook his head, reaching for his coffee. He took a long swig of it.

 He planned on taking over some of the students’ training alongside Raven, suspecting Charles was too soft on them. Maybe a few language classes as well, once he was more settled here. For now, the Brotherhood and Charles both came first.

“More so what classes you want to get back to first.” Erik said casually, staring at Charles with intent, waiting for the same spike of uncertainty and fear from the night before. It never came, Charles instead gracing him with a tight smile. hope and yearning rose up in both their minds, alongside a wave of anxiety. Erik squeezed his hand. He leaned over so he could press their foreheads together, his voice little more than a whisper. “It’s alright if you’re not ready yet.” 

“Hmm, you would be.” Charles pointed out with a small sigh, remorse flickering to life in his gaze. Erik caught his mouth in a fierce kiss, pushing his affection and his pride to the forefront of his mind. He let them both wash over Charles. 

He broke the kiss only when the shame subsided, still lingering along the edges, but no longer overtaking his hppe. Charles shook his head, his gaze softening as he shifted back so they were no longer pressed together. 

Their hands were  still intertwined, neither of them willing to be apart yet. 

“We’re different people.” Erik said bluntly as he reached for his fork, suspecting the eggs would grow cold if they did not start eating soon. His gaze was kinder than his brusque words. He tilted his head to the side, the other fork floating through the air and landing on the other side of the table. 

Charles pushed the fork aside and reached for a piece of toast instead. He tore it up into smaller and smaller pieces until Erik pressed a hand against his wrist. “We both have our own strengths, Charles, even if you can’t remember yours right now.”

“And if I never do?” Charles asked softly, glancing hesitantly at his eggs as he moved them around on the plate. He did not take a single bite.

 A resigned despair rose up in his mind, an expectation of being left which had been there long before Erik. He squeezed Charles’ hand, staring at him intently until he met Erik’s gaze with a tremulous one of his own. 

“I’m not leaving either way. But you’re already starting to.” Erik pressed a hand against his cheek, pushing the ridiculous little hedgehog to the front of his mind. He reminded him how he reached out to his students and to Erik when his emotions were buried under ice and sheet metal. 

He showed Charles the hope in his gaze and the warmth of his smile, the resigned way he forced himself to eat just to make Erik and Raven happy. How his grief was born from his compassion as much as it was his suffering. 

Charles might have tried to numb all the best and worst parts of himself, but he had never succeeded. He was too stubborn to lose himself for very long. “You’ll be running this place again before I finish the new security system.”

“You hope.” Charles corrected him in a clipped voice, but his gaze was more amused than anything else, a certain delight he always took when Erik was sure of things, his confidence apparently charming until it was not. 

Erik pushed the plate toward Charles, his fork turning in his hand so the prongs were angled toward the eggs. Charles snorted and took a bite, chewing pointedly as he glared at Erik.

“I know.” Erik corrected him, his confidence bordering on arrogant as he smirked over at Charles, letting his own faith bolster Charles’ self-confidence little by little. He called Charles arrogant once, but what he had not explained was that he was right to be. 

They were equals, the same at the core. It was why Erik knew Charles would find his way. 

Charles leaned over across the table suddenly, kissing Erik desperately. It was a thank you and a vow all in one. Then he went back to eating his eggs. Erik tried not to stare with too much awe.

Charles shifted against the headboard, glancing over at the mirror and then away from it, worried this might be a mistake. It had been a few days since he stopped suppressing his emotions, and while he had yet to get back to the classroom as quickly as he and Erik hoped, he was getting back to his life. 

He had spent the past few days catching up on lesson plans. He slowly integrated himself back into life at his school. He joined Hank and Alex for lunch. He left his office door open, students slowly coming to him with their questions and their fears. 

Charles found he was feeling more and more like himself, and he caught Erik watching him with pride when he stopped by the study or his physical therapy sessions. Charles sensed something else from Erik when he stretched and his shirt rode up. his desire was as overwhelming as it had been before Cuba. 

It was that rush of need which led Charles to where he was now. Lying naked against their sheets, which pooled around his waist. 

He forced himself to look in the mirror this time, his mouth pressed into a thin line. He took in his pale skin, how his muscles shifted underneath. He was still recovering psychologically from Cuba, his body not always feeling like his own. 

The three months he spent in a cell had not helped matters, the body in the mirror more of a stranger to him than ever. In appearance, but also in behavior, his senses numbed alongside his emotions. For weeks he had not experienced anything, no pain but also no pleasure. 

But now Charles was much too sensitive, the silk of his sheets brushing against his chest making him shiver. He had no idea how he would react to more than that, to Erik . 

They spent the last few nights together, but outside of the small overtures from Erik a few days ago, they had been platonic. Charles had no idea what Erik thought of him now. Or if he liked the short hair and broader chest, the newfound sharpness which still lingered in his frame. And those were the mild differences. 

Charles still had enough time to grab some pajamas from his dresser, but Erik’s mind was close enough he did not want to take the risk. Besides, as nervous as he was, he also wanted to take this step. 

He had not been with anyone since Cuba, and he missed Erik. he missed the feel of his body pressed up against his, the intensity of his gaze in bed, the weight of his cock in his mouth. 

And Charles wanted to relearn his own body. He read a few pamphlets the hospital provided and searched out medical texts and first-hand accounts. But his attention had been taken up with building the school and finding students and teachers. 

Going by Erik’s mouth on his neck this morning, Charles suspected he had new erogenous zones, heightened areas of sensitivity or ones no one had paid enough attention to before now. Charles hoped Erik wanted to now. He supposed he would know in a few seconds. 

The door flew open almost as if on cue, Erik standing in the doorway, looking unfairly handsome. The fluorescent lights gave his tanned skin a warm glow, outlining his lean frame and the firm muscles of his chest and thighs. 

Charles swallowed and sat up a bit straighter. He tried to give off an air of confidence. Erik stared at him from the doorway for a few seconds. His bemusement and curiosity filled the room, but did not give Charles any answers. 

Finally, Erik came inside, the door pulling shut and locking behind him. He made his way to the edge of their bed. “Charles, this is a surprise.”

Charles bit his lip and pushed the sheets down a little further, so they rested just below his hip bones. Erik’s gaze followed the sheet down his body. His expression was still, his mind giving away nothing. He shifted so he was facing Charles, their gazes meeting across the bed. The air around them grew heady.

Charles swallowed, still unsure as he reached a hand out toward Erik. He brushed his thumb along the inside of his wrist. “An unwelcome one?”

“I didn’t say that.” Erik snapped in a tone which made it quite clear he was offended by the very idea. Relief bloomed in his stomach. Erik moved until he was hovering over Charles, one hand brushing against his jaw. He let his gaze sweep over Charles’ body, taking in the smooth muscles of his shoulder and his chest, the callouses on his hands and the new scars from his three months in hell

Erik pressed a kiss to the one along his shoulder, tender and reverant, the same way Charles caressed each of his. 

Charles shivered under his touch. Erik pulled back so they were eye to eye, his hand pressing against his jaw.  “Are you sure? I wouldn’t expect you to be ready, after what you’ve been through.”

“I need to get out of my own head, love.” Charles whispered and leaned in. He captured Erik’s lips in a fierce kiss, curling his fingers into his sweater and pulling him closer. He broke the kiss with a gasp. His mouth found Erik’s cheek instead. He bit the fragile skin where Erik’s jaw met his neck. Erik howled, his hands forming into fists. 

Charles pulled back and grinned, a little smug as he licked his lips. Erik met his gaze and Charles caught the lust which was quickly rising up, threatening to eclipse the concern. He leaned back against his pillow, putting more space between them. He glanced up at Erik more earnestly  than before. “Not like that. I miss you. I miss touching you.”

“Alright.” Erik cut him off with a smirk, his desire overtaking every other emotion. He pulled his shirt off in one go and knelt above Charles, his strong legs surrounding him on the bed.

 Erik sighed and slipped off the side of the bed. He shed his jeans and his boxers, so he was naked in front of him. Charles took a second to drink him in, the lean lines of his frame, the way his muscles shifted. Erik sat back down on the bed and hovered over Charles.

Then Erik was on him, his mouth finding the shell of his ear again. He nipped at the sensitive skin. Charles let out a little gasp, gripping Erik’s shoulders and trying to pull him closer. He did not care that it was impossible. Erik could only be closer if he was inside of him, and Charles shivered at the thought.

 Erik pulled back and grinned, leaning over and biting Charles’ bottom lip. He brushed his hand against his jaw. “Hmm, here? What about here?” 

Charles did not have time to ask where he meant, because Erik pressed several kisses down the side of his throat. Charles found himself gasping and writhing against the sheets. Erik slid his hands between them, his fingers spreading across his ribcage. He brushed his thumb over his nipple and Charles moaned, eyes wide as he pressed his body up against Erik’s own, surprised by his own reactions.

 Erik grinned much too proudly, worrying the length of his neck. Charles closed his eyes and moaned. He dug his fingers into Erik’s shoulders. “Oh, Yes! That is delightful.”

“Perfect. I’m going to find every inch of your body that makes you shudder like that, until you don’t remember your own name.” Erik murmured with a heated stare, sitting back so they were no longer pressed together. Charles shivered from the chill and the lack of contact. His eyes were half-lidded as he glanced up at Erik. Erik, who gazed at him with complete adoration, as though he never saw anything quite so lovely. 

Charles bit the inside of his lip. A part of him wanted to shrink away from that look. He did not deserve that much affection anymore. He did not deserve to be so happy when –

Except no. Charles would always mourn for his lost friends and the mistakes he made, but he would not punish himself anymore. He needed to let himself grief, but he also needed to allow himself to love, to trust. Charles would not let terrible men destroy him, snuff out his affection and his hope. 

They tried, but he survived. He survived and now he was going to live, to thrive. That started right now.

“And when do I get to return the favor?” Charles asked in a coy voice, sitting up a little so he could slide his hands down Erik’s chest. He rested his hands against the muscles along his hips. Erik met his eyes, trailing one finger down his cheek. He somehow understood the weight of this moment. He kissed Charles again, pulling them both down against the sheets as he did.

“When I’m satisfied I’ve thoroughly ruined you.” Erik whispered into his ear, his breath hot and sending electricity down Charles’ spine.

 Erik captured his mouth in another fierce kiss, running his thumb across the sharp lines of his clavicle, the other sliding down toward his chest at an agonizing pace. Charles shuddered and lost himself to the sensation and the feeling of love which permeated their bedroom. 

Everything else could wait.

******

Charles stared at the door to the classroom, biting the inside of his lip as he reminded himself he enjoyed teaching, that he was allowed to despite his loss. Now that he let himself feel again, Charles realized he missed his students and their never ending questions and bright smiles, their wonder at their own abilities most of the adults here were only beginning to relearn. 

He liked helping the older students solve their problems and serving as a sounding board for their insecurities. He found creative ways to develop their gifts without boring them.

Charles even enjoyed the minutiae, creating lesson plans and grading papers, figuring out what style of learning worked best for each student. Besides, Sean was running out of ideas for lessons. And he had his own responsibilities at the school. Charles needed to do his part, so rather he wanted to or not was besides the point. 

Still, Charles found himself nervous about taking over his class again, worrying he would have lost a step, or that his students would no longer recognize him as their once beloved Professor. Bold of you to assume you were beloved. Charles scoffed as Erik’s voice filled his mind, thankful for the temporary link he formed between them.

 Charles set it up so he was still only hearing what Erik wanted him to and vice-versa, surface thoughts and emotions shared between them. Charles appreciated the support, and he suspected Erik liked being able to keep an eye on him now that he was no longer projecting his every emotion out to the other man. 

It’s only bold if it’s not true. Charles grinned as he sensed Erik’s dry laugh in the back of his mind, the sound giving him enough confidence to finally slide through the door.

 He smiled as the students twisted around from where they were sitting in a semi-circle and whispering amongst themselves. The room fell silent for a moment, and then Warren threw his hands up and ran across the room, using his wings to propel himself into Charles’ lap. The rest of the students followed after him with half hugs and excited cries, and some of the last knots on Charles' heart came undone. 

Charles lifted Warren up and let him practice flapping his wings a few times, before setting him down on the ground next to Amara, careful not to ruffle his wings. Then he turned so he faced the entire kindergarten class, his smile genuine and warm. “Good morning, class.” 

“Does this mean you’re not sick anymore?” Roberto asked as he crossed his legs underneath him, glancing up at him with obvious interest as he rested his chin on his hands. 

Charles gave him a bright smile and nodded a few times, tilting his head to the right as he glanced over at the bookshelf. Amara rolled to her feet, crossing the small space and grabbing one of the books off of the shelves, holding it up to Charles like it was some kind of prize. In some ways, it very much was.

“I’m doing better, thank you Roberto.” Charles assured him as he took the book from Amara, glancing at her and giving her a grateful smile as he set the book down in his lap. He glanced down at the title, Father Bear Comes Home and flipped over the page Sean dog-eared, carefully unfolding it. 

He suspected the crease might be permanent, and decided not to mind. It gave the book character. “Now, why don’t you tell me about what you read with Sean yesterday?” 

“We read Little Bear, but he read most of it.” Monet told him as she wrinkled up her nose, crossing her arms as she sat down on one of the pillows on the floor, pulling on the threads. Charles nodded, pursing his lips as he opened the sequel open to the first page. 

He held the story out so they could all look at the title page and the illustration of Little Bear standing alongside his mother, both of them staring at a photo of his erstwhile father. Charles idly ran his hand along each word, so the children could follow along, mouthing each word with care. 

“Hmm, I see. He does have a good bear voice.” Charles mused as he imagined Sean acting out each line. He let out a huff of laughter, turning the page until he was at the first chapter, turning the book to face the children once again. 

Charles pressed two fingers under his chin, flicking his gaze across his pupils with a thoughtful expression. “But how about today, we all take turns? That way we can all be surprised.”

“There are a lot of R’s.” Warren murmured as he glanced at the first page, his voice filled with trepidation as he pressed a finger against where the word ‘fisherman’ was printed in big, bold letters. Charles nodded, meeting the boy’s gaze and making sure to give his fear the weight it deserved. 

“Well then we’ll just work through them together.” Charles assured him with a small smile, tracing over the ‘R’ and making a mental note to add speech therapy to his next round of classes. They would need to hire more teachers, and – 

And the idea made Charles halt, his mind coming up against a fresh wave of guilt. He had more teachers once, and his own carelessness led to their deaths. He should not even be thinking about hiring anyone new or letting the students stay here until he could ensure the school was safe, and – 

We’re not safe anywhere, Charles. At least here we have a fighting chance. Erik’s voice cut through his shame, sharp and blunt, cutting through his grief so he could think more clearly. Erik was right. The attack happened because the school was fighting for mutant rights, because his dream was a threat to people who wanted to persecute them. It was arrogant of him to think otherwise, but it was not naive of him to believe the school mattered, that the children in front of him did. It never was. 

He turned his attention back to Warren, whose wings were drooping, his gaze still terribly unsure. “But what if I can’t?”

“Then that’s all right too. What matters is that we both try our best.” Charles kept his tone reassuring and warm, patting him on the shoulder a few times. He sighed inwardly when Warren gave him a toothy grin in return, shaking his feathers out so they spread out across the reading area. 

Amara shuffled toward him to avoid being hit in the face. Charles gave him a warning glance, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. Warren whispered a sheepish apology to Amara, who was already stacking up the pillows together in a rather unsteady tower. 

Charles clapped his hands together, flicking his gaze across the circle until all the students met his gaze. “Now, who wants to find out why Little Bear is going fishing with his friend Mister Owl?”

“I do! I wanna read first!” Monet cried out as she twisted around so she was closer to Charles, folding her hands in her lap to keep from grabbing the book. She shot Charles a pleading glance, her practically rocking back and forth in her seat. “Please?”

“Of course, Amara, and thank you for asking so nicely.” Charles said as he handed her the book, making sure it stayed open to the right page. He listened intently as she went over each word, gently correcting her when she mispronounced something, and helping her sound out each word. 

You spoil them. Erik’s mind shone with fondness, and Charles pictured him in the doorway, shaking his head and pinching his lips together to keep from smiling. 

I give them a healthy learning environment . Charles sent the thought with a wry smile, and turned his attention back to his class where it belonged. They slowly made their way through the next few pages, each student taking their turn until the book made its way back around to Charles. He frowned, wrinkling his nose as he ran his hand over a word on the page, showing it to his students.  “My, now have any of you seen an octopus before?”

“No!” Roberto cried as he threw his hands out again, and Charles handed him the book, making sure he had a strong frip before he let go. Charles pressed two fingers to his temple and wiggled them both. An octopus rose up in the air between him and the students, waving one of their eight arms at his pupils, who all waved back enthusiastically.

 Erik scoffed in his mind, the sound not at all hiding the pride and relief in his mind. That shade of pink is all wrong. Charles cheerfully flipped him the bird in his head, though the image was wrapped up in affection. 

Erik slowly receded from his mind, and Charles found it was not as difficult as he expected to get through the rest of his class, nor the biology lesson he had with the high school class. 

And so his day went, students lining up at his door or following him outside for flying lessons, Charles reaching out to Erik every so often to let him know he was alright. More than alright, even, his enthusiasm only growing as the day drew to a close.

His mind was buzzing with ideas for new classes and papers by the end of the day, and when he joined him in the study for dinner, Erik dutifully asked him about each one. Charles spoke more than he had in weeks, going on and on until his voice started to give out. 

That was when Erik leaned over and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips and a glass of water in his hand, much like he had most nights before Cuba. Charles smiled against his lips, and for the first time in over a year, he did not mind feeling like himself. 

Time moved swiftly once Charles was back teaching, Erik’s rescue missions and protests and Charles’ classes and papers taking up most of their time.

 Before Erik knew it, winter had given way to spring, and he had been at the mansion for nearly as long as he had been before Cuba. In some ways, Erik felt as though he never left, his evenings once again spent with Charles, the two of them near inseparable after dinner. 

 In other ways, everything had changed, the once empty halls filled with students who followed Charles around like ducklings, the bunkers transformed into the base for his Brotherhood.

They tried to keep their work and relationship separate at first, but they bled together as easily as their minds and their bodies. Erik took over training the older students, focusing on combat and protection, because he would not allow anyone to be taken from their home again. Not without a fight, at any rate.

For his part, Charles came back from Cerebro with tired eyes and lists of labs to destroy and politicians to keep an eye on, handing it to Erik wordlessly. He still pushed for peace, publishing his papers and arguing about methods, but he allowed Erik to follow the path he had started in Cuba. Erik did his best to return the favor. 

It was a compromise Erik suspected would come to a head someday, either one of them bending or their bond breaking once again, until another time came when they were on the same path. It was more than Erik ever expected, and he would not ask for more than having Charles by his side and in their bed where he belonged.

I would ask you to teach German and French next semester. Charles’ voice rang out in his head, lilting and warm, and Erik let out a huff of laughter. He sensed Charles brushing along the edges of his mind and welcomed him, but he had not realized he was listening so closely. I wasn’t, you were thinking too loudly. 

Erik snorted, shaking his head as he sauntered across their bedroom, slipping through the bathroom door and pressing a kiss to Charles’ cheek, resting one hand on his shoulder. Charles twisted his head around, tugging on his sweater, and Erik took the hint and leaned over to give him a proper kiss. 

He broke it after a second, taking a step back and glancing at both of them in the bathroom mirror. Charles ran a hand through his hair, and Erik noted it reached the nape of his neck again, his bangs artfully framing his face and his bright eyes.

 Every inch represented another day Charles got back to Erik, his hair growing alongside his hope and optimism. It was a trite thought, the kind of thing he would mock Charles for, but Erik still found himself toying with the end of one brown lock. “Your hair is almost back to normal.” 

“It’s never going to be back to normal again.” Charles murmured with a painful little sigh, his gaze taking on a more melancholy bent as he gazed into the mirror. His hair was threaded with grey now, little streaks which added a worldliness to his face, a certain wisdom which Charles did not have before. 

Erik shook his head, letting go of the brown to reach for some of the grey instead, shifting the hair back and forth between his fingertips.

“You’re hardly the first man to get gray hair.” Erik scoffed as he gave his hair a small tug before letting go completely, Charles’ hair now in complete disarray. Charles made a put upon noise and reached for his brush. 

Erik gave him a more genuine smile, resisting the urge to reach out and muss it up further. “Besides, I think it suits you, gives you an air of sophistication.”

“That’s easy for you to say, when you look exactly the same.” Charles scowled at him without any real heat behind it, a smile in his gaze even as he poked Erik in the chest with his brush. Charles’ mood always improved with the weather, the warmth of spring washing away the last of his exasperation. 

He wondered if Charles had been like this before, his own memories of him from before Cuba colored with love and regret to remember his moods as clearly as he would have liked. Erik supposed that no longer mattered, when Charles was right in front of him, humming something under his breath as he ran his fingers through his hair for the third time. “What are you smiling about?”

“You.” Erik admitted in a put upon tone, leaning against the vanity and staring at Charles out of the corner of his eye. He was smiling because Charles was here, fussing over his hair and still a little grumpy from waking up, had been that way everyday for months. Erik grew used to having Charles back, but he still remembered those days when he woke up to an empty bed and an even emptier Charles.

“Flattery will get you everywhere, but I have training with Alex and Scott at 9, and I can’t be late if we want the garden to survive.” Charles said cheerfully and with a touch of regret, his gaze taking on a more playful bent. 

Erik shook his head, mouth pressed into a thin line, not sure if he was annoyed with Charles for being purposefully obtuse or Scott and Alex for scheduling training so early on a Saturday. Maybe both, he decided, but being annoyed at Charles was its own kind of luxury. He took a few steps back until he was in the doorway again. 

Charles followed him, apparently giving up on trying to salvage his bedhead into something respectable. Erik sat on the edge of their bed, reaching a hand out and linking his together with Charles, so they rested in the air between them, as they had so many times before him. “I didn’t mean — you’re so much like yourself.” 

“You’re just noticing?” Charles grinned playfully at him, his gaze light as he laced their fingers together and brought his other hand up to rest against Erik’s shoulder, his thumb dipping under the collar of his shirt. His gaze turned more contemplative, a ruefulness to his smile which had not been there a second ago. “You were the one who got me here.”

“All I did was stay.” Erik shrugged carelessly, but his gaze was intent when he met Charles’ own. Erik stayed because he believed in Charles, trusted him to find his compassion and his hope again, even if the latter was more tempered than before.

 He stayed because he left when Charles needed him before, and he would not make the same mistake again. They needed each other, were two halves of the same story, pulled apart but always coming back together in the end. 

“About me, maybe.” Charles conceded with a sly smile, shaking his head so a few strands of hair fell across his face .He let go of his shoulder and his hand, transferring himself from his chair and back to the bed with ease. He propped himself up against the headboard, one arm stretched out across the back, his lilac sweater riding up a little to reveal a sliver of pale skin. “Everything else is still a question mark.”

“If you believed that, I wouldn’t still be here.” Erik reminded him as he twisted around so he was facing Charles, not able to stop the challenge which sparked in his gaze. He cocked his head to the right, expression deceptively neutral. “What will you do, if there is a war?” 

“I’ll feel a great swell of pity for the man who comes to my school looking for trouble.” Charles said plainly, his own losing their usual warmth, replaced with a cool pragmatism few besides Erik ever got to see so closely. 

He took in that expression, at the protective fury which rose up underneath it, and found himself pushing Charles into the mattress, his lips hot where they pressed against his jugular.

 Charles let out a guttural moan, wrapping an arm around his waist and pulling him closer. He glanced up at him with half-lidded eyes, letting out a breathy laugh as he traced his jaw with his other hand . Really, Erik? That’s what you find irresistible?

“I was wrong about you, actually.” Erik whispered against his jugular, sliding one hand down his chest, running his nails along his ribs in a way which made Charles shudder, his own hand sliding down his back as if he could find purchase. 

Erik kissed him, soft and lazy, as though they had all the time in the world. Erik hoped they did, this time. He broke the kiss, sitting back so his thighs were splayed on either side of Charles’ hips. “You’re better than you were.” 

“So are you.” Charles told him as he pressed their foreheads together, his hands coming up to rest against Erik’s waist. Charles was right. Almost losing Charles’ had changed him, taught him how to make space for Charles to be vulnerable, the same way Charles slowly taught him to open up over the months before Cuba. 

Charles and Erik helped each other grow, sometimes painfully and sometimes beautifully, but they were always better for it in the long run. Erik smirked at the idea and pushed Charles down against the sheets, who gazed up at him and caught his mouth in another kiss. I love you. 

I love you too. Erik pushed his longing and his tenderness to the forefront of his mind, letting his love for Charles heighten every kiss, every touch between them becoming more potent than it would be with anyone else. Charles smiled against his mouth, his own affection weaving through Erik’s mind, so earnest and powerful it was almost overwhelming.

Erik remembered how he almost lost this emotion, every emotion and every wry smile, and kissed Charles more fiercely than before. 

Erik vowed not to let them lose each other again, and Charles echoed the sentiment, their futures finally aligned.