we all lost people
She gets why Tony loves drinking. Ikol gets it because as he takes another shot, nothing matters. Not the fact that she’s dying and the alcohol is probably killing her faster, not the fact that her brother hates her and the only person that truly likes her is her damn dog that she barely remembers.
None of it matters, not even when some girl asks if Ikol wants to “take another”. They thought that she meant another shot, Ikol didn’t expect to be huddled in a gross bathroom stall with her and staring at a white line balanced on her hand.
“what?” she asks once she sees Ikol’s hesitation “you wanna try something else? I got Molly”
Ikol frowns “I don’t know what that is”
She smiles as she digs in her pocket “it’s amazing”
And it was, it is amazing. Ikol thought alcohol was enough but now that he feels this. Her body light but heavy at the same time, like a cloud. She’s sweaty but she doesn’t care because her entire body feels like she’s not dying anymore. She feels good, so does everything else.
Cold water feels amazing in her dry mouth, the cool air freezing against her sweaty skin, the concrete walls feel so soft and she can not stop touching everything.
She sighs as she finally makes it to the lounge, flopping down on the couch and not even noticing that she basically kicked Tony in the process because, honestly she didn’t even notice Tony there. She didn’t notice Sam in the kitchen either.
Tony says “hello” and it almost sounds like a question. Ikol opens her eyes and looks at him, his brows furrowed and his body tense as he stares at her.
“hi, figure out how to save me yet?”
Tony blinks at her, looking at Sam now sitting across from them and then back at her. “Kol?” he questions, his eyes widening “how..” Tony trails off, remembering that Ikol is a shapeshifter. “I didn’t know you could change your gender”
“appearance” Sam corrects “not gender”
Ikol lays her head in Tony’s lap and places his arm across her stomach, sadly Tony lifts his arm away like it hurt to touch her, asking “what are you doing?” hurriedly.
Ikol frowns up at him, barely registering the laugh from Sam. “feels nice” she explains and tries to grab his arm again but he doesn’t let her.
That’s when he finally notices her huge pupils, “what are you on?” he questions, also noticing that she has that frown, the barely noticeable frown when you’re not sober. The drug frown.
“something called Molly” she slurs, “is it supposed to feel this good?”
“it’s a sex drug so yeah” as soon as that word comes out of his mouth Ikol’s eyes brighten.
“oh my god” she exasperates as she drops her head back down into Tony’s lap “that sounds amazing”
“ok” Tony suddenly starts shaking his leg, making Ikol groan “get off of me, i can feel your horniness from here” Ikol doesn’t move though “seriously, Kol, get up”
“make me” Ikol replies and Sam bursts out laughing. Tony glares at him meanwhile Ikol just continues looking at Tony. Because Tony is nice.
Tony is nice to her, he checks on her, helps her, chases after her when no one else would, apologizes to her. He cares about her. Tony might be projecting his deceased girlfriend onto Ikol since she came back, but she doesn’t really care.
Tony is better than anyone else-
It seems Tony got tired of waiting and just stands up without warning, making Ikol’s head bounce off the couch a little painfully. “ow” she whines and Tony completely ignores her, going upstairs to his room.
Ikol frowns looking at Sam, who interrupts her by saying “don’t even ask me” and she pouts.
“you don’t know what I was going to ask”
“either you were going to ask about Tony or me”
she pouts even harder at that “I was only joking” she explains, because she was. Everything does feel good but she doesn’t feel that good.
Sam looks her dead in the eyes as he says “well he’s still healing from losing Pepper” his tone suddenly drops a bit as he says “we all lost people”
That hurts, she can’t help but think Sam hates her for coming back instead of Steve. She doesn’t show it though, she simply nods and stands up, announcing “I’m going to bed”
Sam calls out “good luck sleeping on that stuff” a sarcastic tone to the sentence, and he was right. It took hours for her to fall asleep and when she did fall asleep, it wasn’t a good sleep.
She woke up somewhere she didn’t recognize, but judging by the wooden walls, the fireplace and all the fur. She was still on Asgard, in the Healers Quarters.
She instantly gets up, wanting to get out of there before it happened- “My Liege” she spins around to see her, Gullveig, the best healer in Asgard. “how are you feeling?” she reaches over to touch Ikol, to use her seidr and check on them but they flinch away.
“Don’t” they stand up, backing away from her “no, no I don’t-“ they shut up as it happens.
Gullveig places a hand on their arm, quickly backing away with a yelp. Her face falls, eyes wide as she stares at them, asking “what has happened to you?” in a shaky voice. She continues backing away from Ikol, like just being around them hurts.
“what did you see?“
“go” she commands coldly “get out”
“No wait-”
“get out!”
She shouldn’t have taken that stupid pill. She should have stayed home last night.
She knows that, but for some reason they all have the need to tell her so. “shouldn’t have went out last night” Natasha sing songs and Ikol groans, continuing to the kitchen.
Tony butts in,“shouldn’t have taken that molly actually” he corrects as Ikol grabs a bottle of water from the fridge.
“I know” she deadpans and flicks the cap off “don’t have to tell me”
“Don’t listen to them”
She catches a glimpse of black in the corner of her and spins around to catch it but, once again, there’s no one. She blinks, taking a sip of her water as she continues staring at the counter like someone will appear out of thin air.
“stop checking out Tony” sam commands and Ikol snaps out of it, looking up at the man wearing a smirk, trying to stop himself from laughing.
“I was joking last night” only a little bit though.
Tony chuckles “don’t have to be ashamed Kol, I’m irrisitable”
“you are irritab-“ Kol stops, her stomach throbbing and something rising up her throat, she tries to swallow it, ignoring Tony say something smartass to her because she suddenly leans over and throws up in her own hand.
She groans in disgust and goes to the sink to wash it off when suddenly she’s leaning over and puking so hard that her stomach cramps. Her entire body aching as she gags and strains to get the drugs out of her system.
And once she finally finishes, she almost falls asleep standing up like a horse. She would have if Tony didn’t tap her back softly, making her flinch so hard that she hits her elbow on the tap. “ow” she mumbles despite not feeling it.
“sorry” Tony suggests “but you should go to sleep”
She’ll have no problem doing that, she can barely keep her eyes open already. “mhmm, yeah” She doesn’t even know that she replied to him.
Tony stands there and so does she, she doesn’t move other than swaying slightly in her spot and Tony can’t help but laugh. “c’mon” he grabs her arm and places a hand on her back.
“where we going?” she slurs
he says “you’re going to sleep” softly as he leads her to the elevator “I think you’re still drunk” Tony’s alcohol sometimes kicks in after he pukes too.
Ikol nods, her eyes closed the whole time. Trusting him to lead her safely to her room “you’re nice” she mumbles as he opens her door and carefully leads her to the bed “no one else is nice to me”
“yes they are”
“nuh-uh” she mumbles, letting Tony sit her down on the bed “they all ignore me, except Sam”
“Bruce and Nat talk to you” she lays down and Tony throws the blanket over her out of habit.
She sighs with a loud sigh, “I feel sick”
Tony rolls his eyes “well don’t puke yet” he says and grabs the garbage from the bathroom along with a cup of water. When he gets back she’s asleep, soft puffs of air coming out of her mouth and Tony thanks whatever god he can think of first.
He doesn’t feel like being a caretaker today.