Her Hero
“Hey Mama?” You and Nat hear from the backseat. You had picked your daughter up from school and were listening to music in the car on the way home.
You reach to turn down the music and Nat looks her in the rearview mirror.
“Yes, detka?” Nat responds to Ali.
“We talked about what we want to be when we grow up at school today,” Ali explains.
“Oh yeah? That sounds interesting,” Nat says with a soft smile. One that she reserves for speaking to you and your children.
“I want to be an Avenger!” Ali says excitedly from the backseat.
“You can be anything you want to be, baby,” you reply.
“I want to be like Mama!” Ali says and you can’t help but smile at that.
You look at Nat and you see her jaw clinch just briefly before she hides it with a slight nod. Ali drops the conversation for now, her focus shifting to the buildings you pass as you drive down the road.
Later that night, you enter your bedroom to see Natasha already laying down under the covers. She’s been quiet all night since the conversation in the car.
“She’s finally asleep. That kid can really squeak a lot of stories out of me,” you say with a laugh. And Nat just hums in response.
You get ready for bed and crawl next to her. When she doesn’t turn over and pull you into her embrace, it solidifies your worries that she’s upset about earlier.
“Hey Nat, are you alright?” You ask her, touching her shoulder gently.
“Hmm, oh yeah, I’m okay y/n. Just tired,” she replies quietly. To anyone else, her voice may have sounded normal, but you could hear the buried worry etched into her cadence.
“Natasha,” you try to get her attention. “Can you look at me?”
She turns slightly to face you and you look her face over. Her eyes are slightly red rimmed and puffy. The usual sublime smile that her lips curl into at the sight of you is missing and in it’s place is a neutral line of your wife’s lips.
You move your hand to softly graze her cheek and she closes her eyes at your touch, leaning into your warmth.
“My love, what’s going on?” You whisper ever so quietly. Her eyes open again and their green color is accented with deep emotion. Tears begin to form in her eyes.
“What Ali said today,” she begins and you nod encouragingly. “She can’t be like me. I don’t want her to be like me. I’m not someone a child should ever want to be.” She says the words so quietly, so self consciously.
“Nat-“ you try but she interrupts you.
“I’m not a good person, y/n. She can’t be like me,” she repeats and your heart sinks. She sits up to lean against the headboard. You follow in suit.
“I know you don’t want to hear this, Natasha, but I think you need to. You, my love, are an amazing person. One of the best, no actually, the best person I have ever met,” you explain.
“No,” Nat says defiantly, her arms crossed at her chest.
“Yes. I do want Ali to grow up to be like you. That means she’ll be a loving, determined, passionate, empathetic woman,” you explain and she shakes her head.
“But the things I’ve done, y/n,” Nat says.
“Natasha, you are not defined by that. Who you are is not what you did. You were put in an impossible situation and you had to learn how to survive,” you plead for her to listen to your words.
“And despite everything, you found a way to live and to love. You found a way to love me. And to love our daughter. You are such a wonderful woman,” you still aren’t sure if she believes your words, but she uncrosses her arms and in turn opens herself up to you again.
“I’m sorry for shutting down on you,” Natasha says after a few moments of silence.
“It’s okay, baby. As long as you hear what I’m saying now,” you ease her worries.
“I hear you. Not sure if I believe it all, but you made some decent points. I certainly love you and Ali more than I ever thought I would be capable of loving anyone,” Natasha says, her voice thick with honesty.
She scoots closer to you and leans her head onto your shoulder. You wrap your arm around her waist and pull her as close as possible. Your cheek brushes against hers.
“You’re her hero, Natasha. That’s why she wants to be like you,” you tell her.
“Well I may be her hero, but so are you. We’re co-heroes,” Natasha says and you both laugh. You relish in the sound of her deep chuckle.
She turns her head and you two are so close that her nose brushes yours.
“Y/n, you are my hero,” Natasha says more seriously and your heart warms. “Thank you for saving me.”
“Thank you for loving me,” you reply and she smiles as she leans in for a kiss, whispering an I love you too before her lips connect with yours.