Arlong Park part 23
Arlong: King of the pirates? Don’t be foolish. A puny human like you couldn’t possibly conquer the whole sea. You can’t even crush a pillar with your jaws.
Morbius: You're saying that like it's a common thing anybody can do.
Sanji: He’s right. There’s no way a human could do something like that. If those jaws got a hold of you, they’ll snap right through your bones like a butcher.
Luffy: Yeah, so what?! Quit your bragging!
*Luffy punches some debris.*
Luffy: You’re not that awesome! Besides, smashing stones with your teeth isn’t that smart.
Morbius: Oooh, shit. He's got you there.
Yosaku: Way to go! You’re the best, big bro! Tell it like it is!
Johnny: Yeah! What idiot bites a rock anyway?!
Arlong: Fools… That’s not the point! Every member of the human race is ignorant and weak. What good are you if you can’t even pull yourself out of the water or handle a little bite?
*He lunges at Luffy and Morbius and tries to bite them again, but they move out of the way. Luffy then stretches his arms and grabs some nearby swords.*
Luffy: As a matter of fact, I’m worthless without my friend to help me out!
Sanji: No way. Luffy’s a swordsman?
*But all Luffy does is just swing them around wildly.*
Luffy: Take that! And that!
Arlong: Is this a joke? Whatever it is, it isn’t sword play.
Morbius: Have a piece of this!
*Morbius starts punching wildly alongside Luffy. Neither of them landing a hit on Arlong.*
Arlong: And those punches are just pathetic. You’re both just flailing around like children playing pirates!
*Arlong uses his saw-like nose to break one of the swords Luffy is holding and then punches Morbius.*
Arlong: I hope you realize this isn’t a game.
*Luffy swings the other sword but Arlong catches it with his teeth and breaks it too.*
Arlong: That’s enough. Now, die!
Luffy: Shut your face!
*Luffy punches Arlong in the face.*
Morbius: And go fuck yourself!
*Morbius then scratches his chest. Their resulting attacks make Arlong’s teeth shatter and make him bleed.*
Villagers: They just shattered Arlong’s teeth and made him draw blood!
Morbius: Not so good looking without your teeth now, bitch?
Luffy: You’re right! I don’t know how to use a sword, you bastard!
Morbius: Huh?
Usopp: Wait, what exactly is he trying to say here?
Luffy: I’m a terrible sailor. I definitely can’t cook. I don’t know anything about science. And I can’t even lie!
Usopp: Hey!
Morbius: I mean that's true, but where are you going with all this?
Luffy: And without my friends to help me, I would have been dead a long time ago!
Arlong: Shashasha. So you fully and out how pathetic you are? You may be a fool, but you certainly are honest. How must your crew feel tolerating this idiocy day in and day out? I bet they’re sick of it. But that makes me wonder why they tried so desperately to save their halfwit leader. Someone like you doesn’t deserve a ship or a crew. What good is a helpless, rubber brained captain and his pale sidekick to them? What can you possibly do?
Luffy: I can kick your ass!
Sanji: Well, get to it. Ya numbskull.
Zoro: If he does, I’m gonna kill him!
Usopp: I’ve got your back, Luffy!
*The villagers cheer for him.*
Johnny: Get em, big bro!
Yosaku: Yeah! Go for it!
Morbius: So this is the audience? I'm doing stuff too, you know!
Arlong: Cheer all you want; but it won’t change a thing!
*Arlong suddenly regrows his teeth.*
Luffy: He’s got new teeth!
Morbius: How the hell did you do that?!
Arlong: I’m a shark. New teeth will grow, one after another. And with each set they become stronger and stronger.
Morbius: … that is scientifically possible.
*He then takes them out.*
Arlong: Endlessly.
*Another set of teeth grows.*
Arlong: As many as it takes.
*He takes out that set and grows another one.*
Arlong: This is but one of the many gifts we fishmen possess.
Luffy: That’s so cool!
Morbius: I do admit, that is impressive.
Arlong: If neither of you haven’t realized that fishmen are superior, you will soon.
*He holds out the pairs of teeth like weapons.*
Arlong: Tooth attack!
*Arlong then tries to bite down on both of them with his mouth and the teeth in his hands. He manages to bite Morbius’s arm and kicks him into the water. Arlong then starts to bite Luffy.*
Johnny and Yosaku: Big bro Luffy!
Fishman Pirate: Arlong… please… it hurts…
*Arlong realizes that he was actually biting one of his men, with Luffy using him as a shield.*
Arlong: What?! My brother!
Luffy: Phew.
Arlong: You’re dead… You stretchy freak… How dare you use my injured brother as a shield!
Luffy: What are you talking about? You’re the one who attacked me, don’t you remember?
Usopp: That was pretty scary.
Arlong: Don’t move a muscle, Rubber man.
Luffy: Hey. Now that’s an interesting idea.
Johnny: He’s got an idea?
Yosaku: It’s in his brain.
Sanji: Did he come up with some secret scheme?
Arlong: Tooth attack!
*Arlong tries to bite Luffy again, but he dodges Arlong’s teeth before moving him in the face. Shattering his teeth again.*
Luffy: Alright!
Arlong: You fool. There’s no point in crushing my teeth. You don’t get it!
*But everyone else is confused when they see Luffy.*
Yosaku: Uh, big bro Luffy, that can’t be very sanitary.
*Morbius climbs out of the water.*
Morbius: I'm getting sick of being thrown into the wat- what the?
*Luffy has one of Arlong’s sets of teeth in his mouth.*
Luffy: Now I have shark teeth!
Zoro: Really, what were they expecting? It’s Luffy.
Arlong: How long do you intend to keep fooling around?!
*He then charges at Luffy and bites him on the shoulder.*
Luffy: Aaaaahhhhh! A shark bit me!
Johnny and Yosaku: So stop playing games!
Morbius: Yeah, all you did was put shark teeth like dentures! Take this seriously!
Luffy: Well it’s not like I’m having fun!
Arlong: Tooth attack!
*Arlong then bites down on both Luffy and Morbius.*
Johnny and Yosaku: Oh, no!
*But then they both bite down on Arlong.*
Luffy: Gotcha! And now we’re even! Hahahaha!
Morbius: Not so funny, is it?!
Arlong: So you used my teeth. But your puny jaws aren’t strong enough. And your teeth may be sharp, small human… hm, ggr. But your bite is not as strong as mine! Now listen. Sharp as my teeth are, they’re only useful when they come with powerful jaws like mine. Then they're deadly!
*Arlong bites down on Luffy’s elbow while he uses one of the other set of teeth in his hand to bite Morbius’s arm as well.*
Yosaku: Ah! They’re both gonna get their arms bitten off!
Luffy and Morbius: Aaaaaaahhhh!