Everything is gone.
May is 6 feet under. Happy is working at Stark Industries like he has been. No MJ, no Ned, no house, no records. It's like I never existed. After how badly I screwed everything up I guess it's deserved if it saved everyone and the fabric of reality or whatever Steven said. Ha… still feels weird.
The other Spider-men helped me feel like I wasn't alone. Even though they are back in their own worlds now I still have them in my heart. Even across universes I'm not alone. That's all I have to remember. That if I'm not alone, I'll be okay. . . .
I plopped the last of my boxes down in the apartment. My landlord, Mr. Kirk or something like that, muttered something about when rent was due. I probably should have paid attention.
I took in the bland space. Three rooms. The living room/kitchen, the bathroom, and my bed room. The walls were stained yellow from previous smoker inhabitants, I could still easily smell the residual scent with my abilities as my landlord probably made an attempt to drown it out with excessive air freshener. I scrunch my nose in disgust but there wasn't much to do. The floors were wooden and creaky. A rich brown color with obvious stains from who knows what. I'd rather not think about it.
All in all it just made me want to cry. This was no home. It was a house. A place to stay. A building in which I returned to for sleep and down time. I hate it! I stopped myself from continuing to unbox my things when I slammed a box a little too harshly. The counter top had a small hairline crack in it. I wince at the sight before taking a deep breath. I make my way over to the bathroom to clean my face off in hopes I could calm down a bit more.
I splashed water into my face. Cold water. It mixed in with my tears as I looked up into the mirror. My face was a bit of a disturbing sight. Tired features, dulled eyes, eye bags, sunken cheeks, and to top it all of it was red with unattractively puffy eyelids. All was nicely placed on me. A stupid kid who was way in over his head and will never able to live a normal life again. All because of the Spider-bite.
All because of Mr. Stark. All because of Quentin Beck. All because of the spell. All because I wasn't good enough.
I shouldn't have been so hopeful and optimistic. I shouldn't have been so naive. I shouldn't have…
I stared back at those eyes. Those eyes… May always said I got them from my Father. It stung to remember even May wasn't truly my Mother. Ben wasn't my Father. Mr. Stark was just my boss. Mr. Beck, if that was even his real name, was just using me. I failed all of them. I failed Mom and Dad, Ben, Mr. Stark, May, and… I couldn't- I didn't even see him coming. I was blindsided with such childlike innocence that people don't double cross, people don't lie, people don't backstab, people are never bad. That same innocence in my eyes is gone now. Dulled into a nasty Brown.
I feel so hollow and broken. I hate it. I hate it so much.
I sighed heavily. As I diverted my gaze and patted my face dry with a towel. "You're okay, Parker." I muttered under my breath. "Everything will get better."