Asgardians are funky lil dudes
Loki sat on my bed, and I stood in front of him. He didn’t look like the homicidal maniac that almost killed me as a kid. He looked… depressed. Like, really depressed. I hoped that he didn’t remember me from the Stark Expo.
“My brother is in his room if you want more proof. Although, I’d knock.”
“I believe you, Loki. I really do. I just want to know what happened.”
He leaned back, looking at the ceiling.
“It started when Odin died. My daughter, Hela, was freed from Hel. She was destined to destroy Asgard. Thor and I tried to escape to Midgard, but we ended up on Sakaar.”
“Sakaar?”
“I’m getting there, be patient. Sakaar’s ruler, the Grandmaster, was a twisted man. He had a fighting tournament. I found out his weakness, and it was something I could offer,” Loki grimaced. “Thor landed quite a while after I did, and he was entered into the tournament. There, he met the last Valkerie, Brunnhilde. Banner was on the planet as well, and the four of us escaped back to Asgard.
“Hela had taken over Asgard. It was her destiny, and I couldn’t be a prouder mother. But, it was our home. She revived my son, Fenris, and used him to her bidding. He’s a giant wolf, by the way. Well, we realized that Ragnarok had to come either way, so after I pocketed the tesseract, and we let the planet get destroyed.”
I blinked. “Wait, did Hela and Fenris die?”
“Well, yeah. They’re in Hel, so they’re fine. I really need to visit. Anyway, we gathered the Asgardians onto our ship, and we escaped. That’s when I met with Thanos again. He took the tesseract, killed half of our people, and killed me.”
“How… are you here, then?”
“My daughter is the ruler of Hel. I have my ways. I came here, and Thor made me help the Avengers win against Thanos. They used my influence to revive everyone they wanted. I decided to stay here, as I am not exactly welcome in New Asgard.”
I shook my head. “I have so many questions. One, you said mother. Two, your kid is a wolf? Three, you can just go to Hell? You just broke out of Hell?”
“I answered your questions,” Loki said, standing. “Am I free to go?”
“Oh, uh, of course.”
Loki left, leaving me with waaayyy too many questions. So, I knocked on Thor’s door.
“Hold on!” Thor shouted. I heard a lot of commotion inside.
Thor opened the door, shirtless.
“Parkerson!” He hugged me, squeezing way too hard. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”
“I was just talking with your brother, and I-”
Bruce, in his half-hulk form, leaned over Thor, also shirtless. “Oh, hi, Peter.”
Oh my god. I pulled away. “Uh, how about I let you… let’s- let’s meet downstairs.”
We sat downstairs a few minutes later. They both put shirts on, thank god. They sat on the big couch, and I sat on the coffee table.
“So, you were talking with my brother?”
“Yeah, he left me with a lot of questions. He went over what happened on Asgard and how he got here.”
“Well, what are your questions?” Bruce asked.
“First, he said that he’s Hela’s mother.”
Thor smiled. “That’s true.”
Bruce elbowed him.
“Oh! Well, Loki’s a shapeshifter. That’s how that happened.”
“Okay… wow. Uh, he also said that Fenris is his kid.”
“Also true.”
I blinked and looked at Bruce. He shrugged.
“And Hela is ruler of Hell?”
“It’s not our version of Hell. Theirs is different. It’s spelled with one L,” Bruce offered.
Thor leaned forward. “That’s true as well. I try not to question my brother’s choices in partners. It’s not my place. Yes, my niece is ruler of Hel. She’s quite good at it. Loki was able to get out of Hel because she’s his daughter. I’m sure she would do the same for me, if I ended up there. She’s great, once you get to know her.”
“You do realize she destroyed your planet, right?” I asked, absolutely dumbfounded.
Thor waved a hand. “Eh, It was destined to happen. We don’t hold it against her.”
Bruce waved to someone behind me. Two hands were on my shoulders. My spidey-sense didn’t go off, so I turned.
Natasha.
“Hello, Natasha,” Thor said. She flinched.
“Don’t all-speak me. It’s weird.”
“What’s all-speak?” I asked. Thor smiled.
“It’s an ability that Asgardians have. We can hear any language as our own, and whatever we speak is heard in the target’s native language. I mainly use it to mess with our bilingual friends here,” He gestured behind me.
“And it’s annoying as fuck,” Natasha said, pulling away. “Come on, Peter, I have to introduce you to the new members.”