Chapter 4
The bar was loud, much louder than Kate had anticipated. She pressed down on her ears for a second but soon accepted she could nothing do to stop the music from vibrating against her skull. She dropped her hands to her sides and peered around the entrance. Not far away, she spotted Beca and Chloe grabbing a table in a corner that thankfully looked like the quietest place in the room.
Chloe was the first of the pair to jump from her chair, greeting Kate with a tight hug. The hug from Beca was much shorter but full of the same enthusiasm as the first.
Kate smiled as she dropped into one of the chairs across from them. "God, how I missed this."
Chloe gave her a sour face, though she was clearly stifling her laughter. "You said you walked here. You could've come here any time, Kate."
"No, what do you take me for?" Kate replied, rolling her eyes. She leaned in over the table, giving each of them a light pat on the shoulder. "It's you guys that I missed. Obviously."
"It's been like a week, Legacy. Legacy? Wait, can we even still call you that?" Beca trailed off.
"Only if you consider paying off a Bella from the eighties to say she's my mother as 'legacy' material."
Chloe raised a brow, a playful smile on her face. "Oh."
"And none of my friends agree to come to bars with me anymore. 'Kate, you projectile vomited over my carpet.' 'Kate, that carpet shampooer cost sixty bucks to rent,'" Kate sighed, throwing up her hands in exasperation. "It's not my fault they jack up all the prices in this city."
"Don't you operate one of the largest grossing companies in the city? You do call for a bit of blame there," Beca replied, pulling off her jacket and pushing it over the back of her chair.
"Oh my god," Kate's eyes widened as she digested the question. She leaned back into her chair, pushing it up onto its back legs. "My company. That is probably not great."
Chloe's jaw slacked, staring at Kate with a mix of confusion and shock. "Did you manage to forget about your own business?"
"Only that it was my problem to deal with,” Kate trailed off. She pursed her lips, glancing around the room as she tapped methodically on the table. Abruptly, she stood, hands flat on the table. “Let's get another round, Ladies, my treat."
Kate digs her fingertips into the concrete sidewalk, acid bubbling up in the back of her throat. She was surprised she had managed to hold it back this long in the first place. She tried to focus on the pain from digging into the concrete but blew chunks anyway. Though, Kate wouldn't have considered it “chunks,” considering it was primarily liquid and stomach fluids. She leaned over the sewer grate, one leg thrown carelessly into the road as she coughed up the last bit of vomit.
Kate stood, her knees unsteady under the rest of her body. She wiped her mouth with the side of her hand, stepping back fully onto the sidewalk in the direction of her apartment. She could hear Chloe and Beca behind her, calling her name and telling her to wait. She rolled her eyes, not bothering to look back as she walked. They were making a big deal out of things, dramatizing everything. In the back of her mind, she knew that wasn’t true.
She made it almost a dozen steps before she sat against the concrete wall of a building, her friends approaching her. She rubbed her face, dragging her fingers against the bridge of her nose in an attempt to keep the world from spinning. She giggled as Chloe and Beca got closer, laughing at her feeble attempt to make anything feel better. Nothing was going to make it feel better.
“Hey, you guys,” Kate mumbled, waving her hand in the direction of Beca’s coat, followed by a reaching motion. “Hi.”
“You can’t have my jacket.” Beca ignored her greetings. She stood a few feet away, holding a defensive stance as if expecting something. Contrary to her girlfriend, Chloe crouched in front of Kate with a warm smile.
“No, god. Where’s it from?” Kate amended, doing her best to ignore the implications behind the distance Beca had put between them.
“I got it from Nordstrom, but you,” Chloe reached out to push a piece of hair from Kate’s face. “had too much to drink, Kate.”
Beca’s gaze softened. “Do you have anyone you could call?”
“I like your jacket.” Kate thought Yelena would've liked the jacket. It was an olive-toned brown with way more pockets than you would ever need in a casual jacket. Yelena would've loved it. Maybe that’s why Beca was upset. Maybe Kate had said something about Yelena. But, then again, Kate couldn't really remember anything about her night up until sitting on the sidewalk. Panic settled in the base of her stomach, knowing that she’d blanked an entire chunk of her day. She scrunched her face up, groaning as she lolled her head against the concrete.
“Watch it,” Beca drew out, taking a few panicked steps back. “She looks like she’s about to be sick, and I am not getting those stains out of your sweater.”
“Like I haven't had to wash Aubrey’s puke out of my clothes before,” Chloe grimaced.
Beca sighed in accelerated annoyance. “Fine, but if you smell like shit after this, you aren't sleeping in the bed.”
Oh, Kate thought. Beca wasn’t upset with her, just upset with the idea of getting puked on. She should've known better than to worry because nothing had happened that Kate needed to worry about. Kate was quickly jostled out of her thoughts as Chloe’s hands patted down her sides.
“Jesus, at least by me dinner first,” Kate whined as Chloe reached into the pocket of her coat, pulling out Kate’s phone.
Chloe smiles at the success in her hands, quickly swiping it open. She expected some sort of password or protection from the owner of a tech security company but was grateful at the moment. It felt to her like Kate was a little too out of it to type in a password correctly. Swiping through her contacts, Chloe painstakingly pushed past the dozens of unanswered calls to a number she didn't recognize.
Chloe first decided to try dialing the contact labeled “Mom,” though she promptly received a message that the number had been disconnected. Chloe frowned, unsure what to do with the information she had just received. She decided it would be better to ask about it later and moved on to the emergency contact labeled “The Other Hawkeye.”
The person on the other end picked up after the second ring. “Hey, Kid. I was about to leave for date night, so you better not be calling for another one of your rants.” The man trailed off, muttering something to someone on the other end of the phone. “Is everything alright?”
Chloe stalled for a moment, realizing she was calling a strange man that she’d never heard of before. “Uh- Sorry, hello.”
The man’s voice hardened, now entirely business. “Who is this?”
“I’m-” Chloe paused, staring at the dejected woman before her. “I’m Kate’s friend. You’re in as her emergency contact. I tried calling her mom first, but it said the line was disconnected.”
He let out a breathy sigh that she could tell was filled with relief. His tone changed almost immediately, but it wasn't as lively as it was when he first picked up. “Yeah, it would, wouldn’t it. What’s going on?”
“We met up at this bar, and suddenly she’s glued to the sidewalk levels of drunk,” Chloe recollected, her voice rising as she told him. “I mean, I don't even know how it happened; she drank less than me in there. She must've been drinking before she met with us-”
“Kate, do not fall asleep here. I swear to god,” Beca interrupted, inching closer to tap Kate’s shoulder. Kate didn’t respond and instead sat, unmoving.
“Kate,” Chloe said more forcefully, reaching out with an unsteady hand.
Kate groaned, pulling her hand up to rub the side of her face. “I’m good. M’ good. I am just resting my eyes, Ladies.”
“Oh my God,” Chloe muttered under her breath.
“Just put her on the phone. Please,” Clint says, trailing off to a mumble. In response, Chloe took the phone from her ear and attempted to hand it off.
Kate grumbled, pushing away Chloe’s hand. “No, Chloe, I don't want- wanna talk on the phone.” When Chloe became insistent, Kate swatted the device to the concrete, thinking nothing of the potential damage. “Stop.”
“Hawkeye.” She heard Clint’s voice bumble from the phone on the ground. Reluctantly, she picked it up, placing it against her ear.
“What’s happening, Big Bird?” Kate asked, her voice light as if nothing had happened.
As they began speaking on the phone, Chloe stood, moving to stand with Beca a few feet away. A frown was plastered across her face, and she could not look at the woman in front of her. Beca reached to cup her face, rubbing a gentle finger across her cheekbone.
“It’s going to be okay,” Beca tells her, leaning her head in with a small smile.
“I know. I know it is. I just, I don't even know.” Chloe stumbled over her words as she spoke.
Chloe’s head immediately snapped toward Kate as their conversation was interrupted by broken sobs. Tears ran down her face, glistening in the streetlight above them. Her head was tilted back, pressing harder and harder into the wall.
“She’s visiting you guys, isn't she?” Kate asked. Whatever she had thought to say next was caught in the back of her throat, replaced instead by a strangled cough. “Fuck.”
The man said something on the other end of the phone, but neither of the girls could hear what it was. All it did was make the tears fall faster.
“She’s visiting you,” Kate repeated. Her breaths were long and shaky through her open mouth, her teeth visible past her lips, almost as if she were about to smile. She shook her head with forceful sniffle that burned the back of her nose. “I miss her so much.”
Kate opened her mouth to say more, but nothing came out. Her lip quivered. Eventually, she closed her mouth, swallowing hard with a low whimper. She dropped her head to her knees, letting the phone dangle away from her without a word.
As she approached, Chloe could hear the man saying Kate’s name through the phone. She snaked the device out of Kate’s hand, putting it to her own ear as she paced the sidewalk. “Sorry, it’s me again. She won't keep the phone to her ear.”
“It’s okay, Kid.” He paused for a moment in thought. After a moment, he sighed in defeat. “I hate to ask this, but I’d be at least eight hours out from you guys. Take her home and hang around if you can.”
Chloe nodded despite the fact he couldn't see her. “Yes, of course. I might have a class in the morning, but that'll be fine. we’ll make it work,” she rambled.
“Thanks. And tell Kate we’ll be there for her birthday.”
Hanging up the phone, Chloe looked back to Kate, who was now standing. She looked shockingly sober compared to the scene they had been privy to a moment before. The only evidence of their night was the red swelling under her eyes and the streaks that stained her cheeks.
Kate jiggled the key in the lock as she pulled it out, clanking around her keychains. She could feel Chloe and Beca closely lingering behind her as she opened the door to her flat.
“Hey, Baby,” she cooed at her dog. Lucky circled around their feet the moment they stepped foot into the apartment. His persistent presence was a constant reminder that he needed to be fed. Kate crouched in front of one of the cupboards, struggling to pull out a large bag of dog food.
“Kate,” Beca cautioned, the ghost of a smile crossing her lips. “Seriously, go lay down.”
“I need to feed Lucky,” she whined, pulling out the bag with one hard tug. “He’s hungry. Look at this hungry face.” She reached out, forgetting about the food, and instead delved into the depths of Lucky’s golden fur. She gently grabbed at the sides of his face, making him look chubby as she turned his head to the other women. “He’s so hungry.”
“Oh, hey, no.” Chloe crouched in front of her, sliding the food bag out of the woman’s reach. “Don’t worry, I can handle this stuff.”
With brows pushed together with a pensive gaze, Kate worried her lip. After a moment, she seemed to accept and continued listing off the things he would need. “He needs water, but I don't see his bowl. I think h-” She paused, her face blanching between words as she attempted to push back vomit. “Ugh. He moved it. And give him a slice of pizza 'cause he's a good boy.”
Kate motioned to the leftover pizza box on the counter. Chloe nodded diligently, though she could hear Beca behind her, barely stifling her laughter.
“A really good boy,” she continued, getting up from the floor. She walked across the room, staring at the stairs to her loft for a moment before collapsing on the couch instead.
“You guys take my bed,” she meant to say, but with her head stuffed into a blanket, it sounded much more like: “Foogus cake my med.”
Chloe rolled her eyes with a fond smile. She gazed around the apartment, looking for where the dog’s bowl could be but quickly gave up as exhaustion set it. Instead, she grabbed a small bowl that had seemed long forgotten from the floor. She let out a non-committal hum as she read the gold lettering spelling “Fanny.” She decided it was good enough and wiped out the dust before filling it with water. It was then that she spotted the various whiskey bottles lined next to the sink, waiting to be rinsed for recycling.
“Wow, this thing is actually so heavy,” Beca complained as she lifted the bag of dog food into the cupboard. Chloe snapped her gaze away from the disheartening scene before her, glancing over to find Beca had scooped out Lucky’s food. “I’m surprised she even got it out.”
Chloe gave her a small smile, walking the water over with a steady hand. She saw Kate on the couch from over the counter, already fast asleep. Something about the sight made everything feel a little better. “You better get used to it. I want a dog next year.”
“No, Man, come on. Why can’t we just get a cat?”
“That’s because I practically already have a cat, Babe,” Chloe replied with a pointed look.
Beca snorted, tossing her jacket over the back of one of the counter’s chairs. “Case and point. You don’t have to walk me.”
“You know cats have bags of food like that, too, right?”
Beca huffed in leu of response, leading the way up the loft stairs.
Kate sat on a barstool, her front end hanging over the counter as she nursed a coke and lime. Music played over the speakers around the venue; all music she enjoyed, but the noise bounced around her skull like a basketball. Everyone around her was either a friend, an acquaintance, or someone she invited just to keep up appearances. For example, the man on the stool next to her had been attempting to pitch an offer to her for the past thirty minutes.
“Kate- Can I call you that? Kate?” I wish you wouldn’t. “Our partnership is mutually beneficial and has been for years. When I worked with your mother, she was ecstatic about our arrangement, I mean, a phone that comes with built-in Bishop Security cyber protection; we revolutionized the market that day.”
“Right, of course,” Kate muttered, pressing her chin into the counter.
He opened his mouth, about to begin speaking again, but was quickly interrupted by the venue doors opening.
“Kateeee,” Beca called out from the door, the rest of the Bellas trailing behind her. Kate’s annoyance dissipated the instant her attention was drawn to the group.
Kate spun around in her chair, placing a quick hand on the man’s knee. “Just a minute.”
Kate stood to greet the shrill group of women with a smile. Chloe took her into a hug, followed by many of the other girls. Stacy and Flo had moved to procure a nearby table, dropping their things in the seats. Beca sat on the stool next to her, Chloe leaning heavily into her.
“I know you said no gifts, but I’m pretty sure we all got you a little something,” Aubrey smiled, holding up a gift bag. Her eyes drifted to the large table covered in gifts of various sizes. “And I’m sure that's not a surprise since it looks like everyone else had the same idea.”
After a moment of idle chatter, the man behind her cleared his throat. “Anyways, Kate. Looking at this last quarterly, I think it’s time we discussed the plans I started with your mother. As acting CEO, you own over thirty-five percent of my company’s stock, and with my facilities, I think it would be mutually beneficial to-”
“Rodney.” Kate sat back in her seat, doing her best to ignore the glances from the girls around her. “I know what you’re asking for, and I won’t do it.”
“I think that you should reconsider,” He chuckled. “The other day, when I stopped by during your absence, I spoke to Dee about-”
“You shouldn’t be speaking with Dee about anything you haven't passed by me.” Kate took a sip of her drink, wincing as the lime juice dripped around the rim; her lips were still sore from rubbing away mucus and tears. “I will not be doing a merger. Not only does Bishop Securities get a major tax write-off from a partnership, but I also receive dividends I prefer not be paid by my own company.”
“That may be, but with my facilities and your workforce, we could up the production exponentially and lower the prices of our collaborative product, widening our sales market without losing money. This is a real opportunity, Kate.”
“There's a reason you only decided to push this idea after my mother's bereavement of the company,” Kate replied, a bite to her tone. “If you think to call me Kate again, you will lose the only thing keeping your business above bankruptcy. And I’m not sure if you noticed,” Kate waved a hand to the party around her. “But it’s my birthday.”
“Right. Sorry to bother you,” He glanced around with a sigh as he stood. “Ms. Bishop.”
He pivoted on the ball of his foot, sitting back with some of his other colleagues and work partners that had been invited alongside him. Kate sighed as she watched him walk away, curling her knees into her chest, her heels digging into the seat.
“So, what was all that, then?” Amy asked, leaning in as some of the girls pushed in around Kate.
“Nothing, really,” Kate replied quietly, her voice dejected. She glanced at the door behind the women in front of her. “Just business stuff, unfortunately.”
Aubrey frowned, giving her a concerned look that she didn’t meet.
“You’re looking a bit down, Legacy,” Cynthia noted, taking the seat Kate’s associate had just vacated.
Kate let out a sigh that slowly turned into a light chuckle. “No, it’s just been a long day. Honestly, I put together this whole party super last minute, and now I don’t even know if it’s good enough. The streamers could be, like, two inches lower, and the whole thing would look so much more put together. And the tablecloths are the wrong shade of purple, and I’m playing music off my iPod instead of hiring music-playing people,” She rambled, not needing to look at the imperfections as she described them; she’d been memorizing every fault since she stepped through the door. “And that.”
“Music-playing people? You were in a band.” Beca paused, a strange look on her face as she glanced around. “Wait, were we a band?”
Chloe shook her head with a bemused smile pursing her lips.
“No, but Kate, we could sing for you!” Aubrey beamed, clapping her hands together. “We could totally sing anything you want, and I’m sure we could come up with some last-minute choreography.”
“No, as hilarious as that would be to watch, that's okay.” Kate finally gave them a small smile. “Honestly, I think I’m just psyching myself out.”
“You know what I could give you?” Amy said suddenly, holding her hands up as if she’d just gotten an idea. “I think you need a little something. I could give you a bit of my confidence if you wanted. I have plenty on me.”
Kate’s face blanched. “No! No. I’m actually good on that one. I’ve heard where your confidence comes from. No.”
They laughed together briefly, but Kate trailed off before the rest, her gaze flittering over their shoulders into the crowd. After a moment, a tall, dark-haired woman approached them, dragging a shorter girl behind her. The woman pushed through the group, leaning heavily into Kate’s side, an arm slung around her shoulder with a drink in hand.
“Katieee,” America drew out, pulling her closer by the neck. “Happy birthday. You’re the ripe old age of 25; hope you've got life insurance on that body of yours.”
Kate opened her mouth, but the words wouldn’t come. She glanced at Cassie, who showed nothing but a smile, and then at the two women beside her. She couldn't explain it, but a pit welled in her stomach.
“Oh, come on, we're way past that. She’s gotta get on that will of hers. You better sneak me in there, Rich Girl,” Cassie laughed, tapping the end of her shoe against Kate’s.
Next to her, Chloe and Beca shared a confused glance with each other and then searched their friend’s faces for clues. Aubrey shrugged equally confusedly, while Amy didn’t seem to be paying attention.
“Did you guys seriously go get drunk before coming to greet me?” Kate asked, referring to their demeanors, though her eyes drifted to the glass in America’s hand.
“No, she’s just fucking with you.” America reached out to flick the side of Kate’s head with her finger. “And I’m just happy I can sit with you like this without an angry pomeranian on my heels.”
Cassie smiled, glancing between the two of them with an expression Kate couldn't quite place.
American brought the glass over to Kate’s eye level. “This, I actually brought for you, though.”
Kate frowned, glancing away from the woman and the offering in her hand. “I’m good tonight, Meri, okay?”
“Hey,” She says softly, tapping the damp glass against Kate’s face. “It’s your birthday, and no one’s gonna be mad if you act like it. Not even me. It’s not like we’re at my place, plus this place has got hardwood.”
Kate reluctantly took the glass, eliciting a smile from the other woman. She let out a shaky breath. “You guys get out there and have fun. I’ll be out in a bit.”
“If you insist,” America replied, pushing away from Kate. Before she left, she reached a hand out, giving the woman's shoulder a light squeeze. “Smile some, Katie. It’s a good party.”
“You two seem close,” Chloe said as they watched the two women walk away. Her face wasn't nearly as suggestive as her words. Kate could feel the concern reverberating off of her.
Kate’s eyes widened as she placed the drink on the counter. She dug into her hand, grinding her thumbnail against her skin. Everything around her felt distant, like every person, every object, and every sound around them was in a different room. She focused on the pain in her hand, a ringing building in her ears as she thought. She ignored it the other day, but this was too much. How much time have I been losing? What happened with America that made her act like that? To make her look at me like that? Was it just those two moments that I lost? How much more can’t I remember?
“Kate?” Chloe repeated. Kate’s gaze snapped up to her, pulled from her thoughts.
“Uh, Yeah. I mean- Fuck. No. We- No. We aren’t close. I don’t know what that was.” They would've thought she was lying if they hadn't been looking at her face. Her eyes were narrow and distant, and her body shook with every breath. After a moment of silence, it evened out. She took a deep breath, letting the knits fall from her face. “I don't want to think about any of what just happened. You guys should go out too; have fun and all.”
Some of the Bellas reluctantly left. Some went to get drinks, and others went to dance. However, Beca, Chloe, and Aubrey lagged behind, still standing around Kate.
Kate sighed. “Never mind any of that, okay?”
“Hey,” Chloe said, her voice soft. She reached out a hand to rub her shoulder. She wasn't sure what else to do in the situation. She had no idea what had just conspired in front of her. “It’s okay.”
“Let’s just go. I have a friend here I want you guys to meet.”
Kate stood, making her way across the room. She didn't look back to check if they were following her; she didn’t need to. She would have come over here by herself anyway. She spotted the Barton’s small, quiet booth in the corner of the room.
“Kate! Happy birthday, Kiddo,” Clint called as they approached, flagging them down with a broad wave. Laura sat beside him with a glass of wine while her two eldest sat across the booth. Kate looked around for Nate and eventually spotted him by the gift table.
Kate smiled as Laura got out of her seat for a hug. “Hi, Sweetheart.”
“Hey, Guys. These are the girls I told you about. Now you can uh, meet the girl that called you last week, Clint,” Kate replied, rubbing the back of her neck.
“Oh my god, you’re actually hawkeye? I thought that was one of her bits.” Beca’s jaw dropped. “Kate, you didn’t tell me you were friends with him.”
Before she could reply, Kate spotted Nate out of the corner of her eye running towards her with a small, white bag in his hands. He thrust the bag into her arms with an ear-to-ear smile. “Open it. Open it, Katie.”
Kate rolled her eyes, smiling at him. “Okay! I’m opening it.”
Inside the bag and under the colorful tissue paper was a box. She eyed it suspiciously before slipping off the lid. Inside was a stack of kid's drawings, some more obviously drawn by Nate than others. There were a few signed under Lila and one by Cooper. One she really liked was a drawing Nate did of her with him. There were few defining features, and they looked vaguely like stick figures, but Kate loved it nonetheless.
What caught her eye, though, was one drawing with a much higher quality than the rest. Towards the end was a portrait of her, done in a way that looked almost professional. Every feature of the drawn Kate’s face was perfect. The attention to detail was impeccable. Her eyes drifted to the corner of the page where a note was written: маленькая птица.
The paper shook slightly in Kate’s grasp. The people around her stared at her. She knew it was because of her sudden lack of speech or liveliness, but she couldn't bring herself to say anything. The drawing was like looking into a mirror.
“I asked Auntie Lena to draw that one,” Nate barreled on, staring intently at her face, waiting for a reaction to his gift. He placed a small hand over the corner of the drawing, pulling it downward so he could see. “It’s pretty good… But I like mine more.”
Kate didn’t reply. She couldn’t look at him. She couldn’t bring herself to take her eyes off the paper in her hand. She knew it wasn't true, but she had herself convinced that it would vanish from her hands the moment her eyes left it. Maybe it was easier than accepting that if she looked away, the glances she’d find her friends giving her would be unbearable.
“When is she gonna get here?”
“Nate, Honey,” Laura began, but trailed off before turning to her husband. The damage had already been done. “I thought you were going to sneak that one out of his pile.”
Clint muttered something to her that Kate couldn't hear. However, context clues made it clear that he had thought the opposite.
“I’m waiting for her too, Buddy,” Kate finally settled on. Of course, she was; why else would she do all this? She broke her gaze away from the drawing, giving him a small smile before slipping the papers back into the box.
“Well, she’s taking forever.” Nate looked lost in thought for a moment before looking up with searching eyes. “She’s never been late to anything before.”
Kate’s face went blank. She stared at him momentarily, blinking rapidly as if it would push down the sadness behind her eyes. She glanced up at the decorations, the streamers. The decorations she’d been worried about this whole time. She bowed her head, refusing to look Nate in the eye. I have been fooling myself. She was never going to come.
“Yeah. You’re right.” She took a step back, gripping the bag in her hand tighter. Nate looked at her with confusion, but she couldn't find an explanation. She turned on her heel, dropping the gift bag onto a table. She briskly walked through the crowd, pushing past the people around her.
Chloe immediately made a move to follow her, but the woman in the booth quickly put a stop to that.
“Hey, Girls, I’m sorry, but I think space is something she desperately needs right now,” Laura said cautiously, catching the three’s attention. “She’s going through a rough patch, but of course, you already knew that.”
Chloe bit the inside of her lip. “You probably know her better than we do. The real her, anyway, long story.” Laura nodded along with what she was saying. Chloe was sure they knew about Kate’s secret identity by that alone. “Do you think she’s going to be okay?”
Sadness panged across Laura’s face with a sigh. “These things are complicated. She just needs some time. Kate has the biggest heart out of anyone I know, and I do not doubt that she filled every inch of it with that woman.”
“No,” Beca said suddenly. “Because what was so special about her? No offense, but the things we saw were weird as shit.”
“As much as we hate seeing her like this, the things we saw over just a brief period were borderline an issue of safety,” Aubrey nodded.
Laura sighed, pausing for a moment. She looked around the table at her children and then at her youngest, who had been running around in circles like an airplane. “Cooper? Lila? How about you guys take your dad and your brother over to get some punch.”
Reluctantly, they got up from the booth. It was apparent from their expressions that neither Clint nor their kids had a clue what they were talking about. Laura muttered something along the lines of “I’ll tell you later” to her husband as he left the booth.
Once they were out of sight, Laura readily spoke on the topic with a sad smile. “I knew Yelena’s sister for a very, very long time. She was the aunt to my children. And before her passing, she confided in me about her sister. The way the two of them grew up and lived for a very long time, they never learned how to love people."
“So, what? That made her draw stalker-y pictures of Kate naked and sleeping?” Chloe cut in with a pointed look, her voice edging on sarcastic.
Laura paused for a moment and then let out a dry chuckle. “That’s a new one. You’re lucky I’m a mother of teenagers; otherwise, you might’ve embarrassed me.” She took a sip from her glass while she pondered the answer. “No, it didn’t. But since she’s never learned to express her love vocally, she can only do it through extreme action and dedication with no room for interpretation. And thus, obsession.”
I know that’s insane, but no one else will ever love me as much as she does.
“She was ensuring Kate knew she loved her,” Beca clicked together before trailing off. “In her own weird way.”
“That’s right,” she nodded.
“I know you're in there, Kate,” Beca called, knocking on the door. “I don’t care if you’re hungover as shit. Open the door.”
Beca heard rustling from the other side of the door, and after a moment of waiting, it opened. Kate was wearing sweatpants and a tight sports bra as she opened it, swinging the door open almost entirely. Her eyes puffed lightly around her lashes with a red tinge.
“Hey, sorry to bother you so early. Chloe was really worried about you after you disappeared last night. She had a class, so she sent me. Are… Are you okay?”
Kate pressed her eyes shut for a moment. “Yeah, I’m fine. Sorry for freaking you guys out. Seriously, I’m good.”
Beca gave her a skeptical look, not entirely believing, but she accepted the reply anyway. "Okay, just-”
A body peering around the corner inside the apartment cut her off. It was a woman wearing the same shirt Kate had worn the day before. Kate seemed to notice the shift of attention and turned around, sending the woman a glare that could kill her.
“Is everything okay out here?” The woman said softly, concern and confusion written over her face.
Beca stared with a cocked head, her mouth ajar. She glanced back and forth between the woman and Kate.
Kate pinched her brow. “Yes, just give me a second. Go put clothes on,” She replied, her tone more forceful than when Beca had spoken to her a moment ago. Strangely, her face adorned a Chesire smile, one far too perfect to be real. “Look, Beca, is there something else you need from me?”
“I guess not. I’ll see you, then. Shoot us a text next time you’re free.” Beca gave her a small, albeit strained, smile once she had snapped out of her confusion.
Kate didn’t reply and instead closed the door with purposeful quietness. Unlucky for her, the walls were not as thick as she thought. Beca could hear Kate yelling something from through the door. She couldn’t make out most of it but knew it was something about “being unable to stay in the room for five seconds.”
Beca stood for a moment, the situation still racking around her brain. Kate got wasted at her own birthday party. There's a woman in her apartment. They obviously slept together. But Kate had been crying. She massaged her forehead, sighing as she walked down the building's stairs. She stopped one step from the ground floor, her eyes widening. The crucial part of all of this hit her like a truck. The woman was blonde.
Chloe checked her phone for the fifth time in the past few minutes, always looking back to the Bella group chat. Kate hadn't texted any of them for weeks; most concerning, she hadn't looked at a single of the thousand group chat messages. She always replied, reacted, or even just looked at their messages. This was way out of the blue for her. Chloe had tried calling at least a dozen times, but each rang to voicemail.
Chloe passed back and forth through the room, searching for imperfections or spots she hadn't quite reached to dust. She’d rearranged the rooms in her apartment a few times since she noticed something was off, just something to keep her mind off things. At her point in cleaning, not many things were left to do. Boredom and worry itched up Chloe’s spine as she failed to find another thing to clean or do.
“Babe.” Beca sat in a chair across the room, on her phone. “I’m sure she is fine. Kate’s a big girl. She knows not to talk to strangers and to look both ways before crossing.”
“But what if she isn't? What if she just went off and got hurt or something?” She protested, rearranging one of their side tables.
Chloe trailed off on a list of possibilities that Beca mostly tuned out. That is until the phone in her hand began buzzing. It was a blocked number.
“Hello?” Beca said into the phone, pulling it to her ear.
“Hey, Kid. It’s Clint. Sorry to call you like this. ‘This’ being a stranger having your number,” he rambled.
“Have you heard from Kate at all?” Beca cut him off, ignoring his preliminary introductions. “I think my girlfriend might actually go insane if she has to wait another day to hear from her.”
Clint let out a deep sigh. “Yeah, that's actually why I’m calling. She left New York; she’s been out west for a few weeks. Don’t be upset. She didn’t let anyone know. I just found out today, and I didn’t want any of her friends to worry. I've been making house calls, or whatever you wanna call this, for the past hour.”
“Oh… Okay,” She paused, digesting the information for a long moment. “Thank you. I appreciate you calling. We were worried something might have happened or-”
“Yeah,” Clint cut in. Beca knew by his voice that he knew exactly what she was going through. “So did we. I’m thinking a change of scenery will be good for all the issues she's got going in her head right now.”
They said their goodbyes, and Beca eventually hung up the phone, relaying the information to an expectant Chloe.
“I am just so happy you decided to come out with us, Kate,” Chloe smiled as they walked together down the sidewalk, the street lights providing a cover of ambient lighting.
“Yeah, it’s no problem, really. This is probably what I was excited about most with being back in New York,” Kate replied, looking at the buildings around her as if they were foreign. Beca flashed her a quick smile as her gaze crossed her.
“Are you sure you were okay with meeting at a bar?” Beca asked, bumping together their shoulders.
“Yeah… If I crumpled at the sight of someone else drinking, I don't think I’d qualify myself as sober.” Kate let out a dry laugh, rubbing the back of her neck.
They walked in silence for a moment before Chloe broke it, her voice like a light piercing through the night. “I’m glad you’re doing better, Katie. Really.”
Kate faltered. They’d always danced around her issues, never talking about them directly like this. “Since when do you call me Katie?” Chloe rolled her eyes. “But seriously, you guys aren't mad that I was gone so long? That I left like that?”
“Course not. We want whatever makes you happy. I’m just glad you’re starting to feel like yourself again. Plus, that Avengers stuff was really cool.”
“And if our friendship couldn't last six months without seeing you,” Beca added, “I don't think I’d qualify it as a friendship.”
Kate let out a long sigh. “As much as I loved California, I missed you guys.”
They stayed in a comfortable silence after that, only the sound of cars in the distance behind them. They walked a good chunk of the way together, and eventually, Kate would have to split off from them to catch the bus. Quiet moments, even comfortable ones, left Kate alone with her thoughts. Even after she stopped drinking, she never remembered the blank spots. Something about those empty spaces put Kate in a state of unease.
They were almost to the point where they’d go their separate ways. However, Kate had noticed a man behind them. He’d just made the same turn as them for the third time.
“I don’t want to alarm you guys, but that guy behind us is definitely following us,” Kate muttered, just loud enough that her companions could hear.
Beca snorted. “Are you sure he’s not just going on the same bus as you, Dumbass?”
“That depends. Do you think he looks like the kinda guy to shoot up a bus stop or just us three secluded women?”
Beca glanced behind them, her eyes trailing to the gun holstered around his hip. The man’s hand dangled at full length, but with his sleeveless shirt, she could see his muscles tensing and itching towards it. Her blood ran cold. She quickly reached out, desperately grasping for Chloe’s hand.
Kate’s body tensed, her feet digging into the concrete as she forced the girls beside her to keep a steady pace. Her mouth went dry, yet everywhere else seemed to moisten. She felt a line of sweat drip down behind her ear. She’d been in situations like this, and even worse, for the last six months, but nothing could have prepared her for this. To have to protect people she truly cared for.
She abruptly turned, about to make a pass at the man behind them, but something stopped her. A flash of blonde and sudden movement pulled the man into a dark alley. Kate’s eyes widened, every piece of fear gone and replaced with something… else.
She bolted to the alley, running hard enough to almost slam into the wall before her. She used the corner of the building to steady herself as her chest heaved. She wasn’t sure she’d run that fast her entire time as an Avenger.
A cold breeze ran against the shell of her ear, running whisps of her hair to tickle against her skin. The alley was completely empty. Kate couldn't help but show the disappointment on her face.
“Kate,” Chloe called as the two women rushed over. Kate couldn’t reply. “Kate?”
“What?” Kate replied with more force than she’d ever mean. Her face immediately showed her regret, but she couldn’t take her eyes off the empty space in front of her.
Neither of them spoke, forcing Kate into an uncomfortable silence. It was more than suffocating. Eventually, she looked over at them. Beca had a frown plastered over her face, while Chloe wore a pained expression.
“Can you guys-” Her exhales imposed a shaky lower lip, causing her teeth clicked together softly with each breath she took. Kate forced a deep breath, steadying herself. She then held out a hand to punctuate her words, but even with steady breathing, it trembled against the silence. “-I need to be with people tonight. Please.”
Half an hour later, Kate ended up curled on her couch. Lucky hopped beside her as she leaned back, nuzzling under her blanket and resting his nose over her thigh. Kate smiled, holding out a spoonful of ice cream for him to lick. Chloe gave her a disgruntled look at the action.
“We could watch one of those shitty Hallmark movies you hate,” Beca suggested as she scrolled through the options on the tv.
“I don’t hate them,” Kate drew out. “There’s just nothing surprising any time you watch one; they’re all exactly the same.” Kate took a spoonful of ice cream into her mouth, not bothering to swallow before she spoke. “‘Hey, random man I just met, let's have an unconventional relationship for years, have a poorly written split, and then rekindle our love just before the end of the movie because the writers can't figure out how to write sad endings.’”
Chloe dropped her jaw in exaggerated shock as she snatched the remote from Beca’s hands. “You’re so gross. You both suck.”
Chloe threw on the first Hallmark movie to appear as she switched to the channel. It played for a few minutes before Beca shifted awkwardly on the couch beside them.
“Do you… wanna talk about any of the stuff going on with you? We talked a bit after the USO tour, but never really about the big elephant in the room. If you don't want to, I mean, I get it. I just thought maybe it’d help. Just, we can talk. If you want.” Beca kept her eyes trained on her lap, fumbling with her rings.
Kate sighed, gazing sadly at the tv as it played in the background. “She left. After everything that happened on the boat.”
“I guess you could say our ship had sailed on our relationship.” Kate laughed softly. She quickly transitioned to awkwardly clearing her throat once she’d realized no one else was laughing. “It was rough for me. I’m sure you already assumed that.”
“And that's why you started drinking?” Chloe asked quietly, her eyes soft.
Kate let out a quiet snort. “No. God, no. Everything was hard for me, not just that. Having to lie to you all face-to-face again. My mom getting arrested…” They both frown at her, unaware of that fact. “No. No, that's only half the truth. Getting my mom arrested, and then everything with my- With Yelena. I never knew where I stood with her. Ever. It was always confusing, and it hurt, but I was too much of a chicken-shit just to ask her.”
Kate scrunched her eyebrows as she thought, her hands absentmindedly running through Lucky’s fur. “I was drinking before that. Not as much, but enough to throw me off my game. It’s why I said what I did to her.”
“Did she know?” Beca asked.
“No. I mean, she knew I drank. She never knew I had a history or what I was really doing.”
Beca scooted close, sitting against Lucky’s back end. She rubbed Kate’s shoulder as an act of comfort.
“I loved her, you know?” Kate asked, though it was more like a statement. She knew that they knew.
Beca slipped her hand around her back, resting between her shoulder blades. “Yeah, Honey. We know.”
“How about I get us something to drink? You have any coke in the fridge?” Chloe asked, standing from the couch with a small smile.
“Um, I should, I think. Be careful, though. I don’t think I’ve opened that fridge since before we left for Spain,” Kate laughed softly.
After a moment of rummaging through the fridge, silence permeated the room. Chloe returned a moment later, holding a black Tupperware in her hands, a strange look on her face.
“This was in there? I think it's for you.” Chloe held the container forward.
“If you’re about to hand me a Tupperware of moldy leftovers, that is so hilarious, but I will have to throw it at you,” Kate trailed off.
Chloe shook her head, tilting her head towards it, prompting her to open it. Kate took it, glancing through the plastic to find that whatever it was definitely wasn't food. She lifted the lid to find a small phone inside, one she’d recognize anywhere. Phones like this were the highlight of her life in past years, but it wasn’t like that anymore. Kate blinked rapidly, focusing intently on the object in front of her.
Along with it was a short note in beautifully written Russian: I know that I upset you last week, Kate. I thought I had your best interest in mind, but I was not thinking about what you would want. So much I regret. Please text me when you can. On the phone is my new number.