James never would have imagined you could be this sick, especially considering that in the beginning you had no morning sickness at all, it's how you'd managed to keep it a secret from Bucky so easily. But all that went out the window when you reached your second trimester. Now there's so much nausea, pounding headaches and unpredictable dizzy spells, and all from your pregnancy.
Morning sickness doesn't begin to describe the hell you've been through. Morning James' Great Aunt Fanny, No no no, you are sick all day, and all night for that matter. It was like the two of them never stopped moving, the swaying of their bodies in your ever growing tummy, was making you almost sea-sick. You would give anything for them to stop. But these two are way more active then your sweet little Georgie was.
Heck there had been countless times you had made James take you to the doctor, just to be sure, because you hadn't felt Georgie move in a few days. Every visit was the same, he was healthy just lazy. But these two never give you a moments rest, so there's no need for special runs to the Doctor this time around.
Well actually that isn't true. Your intense morning sickness had set James into a fury of worry, and he had called the poor doctor numerous times because of it. The sweet old doctor reassuring James each time that everything was ok, reminding him of the ginger tea, and telling him to try light things to eat like broth or toast. The last call though, the Doctor no longer thought it just a case of morning sickness.
"Hyperemesis Gravidarum, I'm guessing my dear boy. Now you remember what I told you the first go around, Do Not let anyone give her Thalidomide, or Cocaine, Mercury, or god forbid an injection of your blood, for that matter. There are a lot of Doctors out there who have crazy beliefs son, some who even try and say the condition is the mothers fault and brought on because she doesn't want the child. That isn't true and don't let anyone try to convince you otherwise. Keep fluids in her and if things get too bad, there is a new treatment we can try where we'll give here intravenous fluids. She will have to spend time away at a hospital for it, but if things get dire, she won't have a choice. Don't wanna take chances with those two bundles on the line. Now you call anytime James ok. If you are worried, call, and I'll come over right away." The sincerity in his voice, helped to calm James somewhat. He isn't alone in this, and they have a good doctor.
"Okay Doc, I'll call Ma and Becca about staying with her while I'm at work, and let them know what you told me. Thank you for everthing. Sorry to have to keep bugging you like this Sir." James sighs, looking to Georgie and trying to give his boy an encouraging smile.
"It's no trouble at all my boy, that's what I'm here for. Now you tell your Ma and sister to try and keep your wife off her feet, and they can call me too if they are worried. Ok James, I've got to go, you have a goodnight." And with that the line went dead. James hung the phone on the receiver, only to pick it back up and call his Ma.
He filled is mother in on what the Doctor had said, the two of them coming up with a schedule for Rebecca and her to help. Winnie gave James a few words of encouragement, and offered to keep Georgie over night anytime James might need. Then the call was over and James was once again looking into a pair of identical blue eyes. "Come on Georgie let's go check on Momma, then we can go work on the cribs how's that sound?" Bucky does his best to sound excited, and luckily Georgie didn't seem to know the difference.
"YESH! Cib fo da babeez." He claps, then makes a bee-line for the stairs.
"Hey, hey hey, little speedster. Where to you think you're going?" James takes off after the toddler, chuckling as he catches him.
Georgie pouts with a little humph, when scooped into his daddy's arm. "take tairs to momma." He says with a roll of the eye, and James has to hold in his laugh. It was a complete mimic of the face you give him, when you think he's asked you a stupid question.
"You can't climb them yet buddy, you might get hurt." James voice is soft as he addresses his son.
"No-uh, I's a bug broder." Georgie rebukes, and James is finding it hard not to crack.
"Big brother Georgie, BIG brother. And you still can't climb the stairs yet buddy, I need you to be just a little bit bigger ok?" James attempts reasoning with his young son.
"Otay daddy, but i's sill big ight?" James set's Georgie down as they reach the top of the stairs, smiling to the boy fondly.
"Yes Georgie, you have become quite the big boy indeed." That was all the tiny boy needed to hear, clapping his hands wildly and squealing with delight as he takes off toward your bedroom.
"Hold up Georgie, quiet, Momma may be sleeping." James again finds himself taking off after the toddler.
The two boys peek in, and as James had hoped, you were fast asleep. Maybe the ginger tea had helped to finally settle your stomach, though it hadn't helped up to this point. Still James had to keep hoping something would work, he really didn't want to see you hospitalized.
James and Georgie left you to sleep, and then headed back downstairs and out the back door, to the little shed you had fixed up for him. It had taking James a little more time then he cared to admit, to get used to everything. But after so much encouragement, from not only you, James pushed on and is so glad he didn't give up.
The two men who had helped to build his special equiptment, had even been over several times. They bragged on Bucky and his work, even asking him to whittle a few things for them when he had time. It had been the boost to his confidence that he really needed. And it really showed in all his future work.
And if you were to ask him, he would say the two cribs he was working on, would be some of his greatest work. He had hand carved every piece, taking his time to make sure every last detail was perfect. His only regret was that he hadn't got to do this for Georgie. But he is making it up to the little tyke, not that he had to, Georgie was happy enough to be helping. But still James is making him the most beautiful wooden rocking horse.
He has a little surprise for you with the rocker, as well. He may have taking the pony he carved you all those years ago, and used it as a model, so he could carve Georgie's rocker in it's likeness. He was already finished with the head and neck, and it was the spitting image. He was really a proud man, and all the woodworking helped to keep his mind off how absolutely terrified he was.
If left to roam, his brain was cruel. Blaming himself for putting you through all this in the first place. He knows you know how he always wanted a big family, but never at the expense of you or your health. If he would have known this could happen, he would have been fine with just the three of you as a family. After all Becca could have a large family and then he would have all those nieces and nephews to also spoil.
But even if he didn't, that wouldn't matter. All that has ever mattered, is that he had you by his side. The thought of possibly losing you, or the twins, was killing James inside. But he had a son to be strong for. He couldn't let Georgie know how afraid he was, he had to keep moving like they would all be ok. Though if things do start to turn for the worst, he'll do his best to explain to the little boy what is happening. But for now he wants to keep him safe, let him enjoy his childhood and the thought of his duties to his soon to be siblings.
One of Georgie's new favorite pass times, is to list off all the things he will be responsible for, once the babies come. He has rather high hopes in himself, and if Bucky is honest, it's one of his new favorite pass times as well. He sits George on the special stool he made, and then gets to work on the first crib.
Bucky is covered in sawdust, but it is completely worth it, as he finishes the sanding on the first crib. He claps his hands, smiling when Georgie preforms the same action, and then James steps back to admire his handy work.
"Butiful daddy, so so petty." Georgie exclaims, and Bucky agrees. He can't wait to get the whole thing painted, but you hadn't picked a color yet. Actually you hadn't been able to do any of the nesting things you did with Georgie. The room still sits the same it had been for years now. Maybe Becca or his Mom could talk to you and get some ideas and then he could get it all set up for you. That would be a nice surprise indeed, and no doubt be a lifted burden for you.
Yes James thinks, as he scoops up his son, he'll talk to his Ma about it tomorrow. After all, stress isn't good for you or the babies, and you worrying about where they will sleep, is no doubt causing you stress. Plus he can't deny that he really enjoyed helping you decorate George's room, so it is a win win for him.
Georgie's head falls to his dad's strong shoulder, as James carries him into the house and up to bed. He quickly dresses him for bed and then tucks him in, giving his brown hair a kiss, then leaves to wash up and then head for his own bedroom.
You don't stir when James enters the room, or even as he dresses for bed. It isn't until he climbs into the bed himself, that you slowly begin to wake.
"How ya feeling doll? Any better?" Bucky brushes the hair from your face as he talks.
"Little better. What did the doc say?" You snuggle up to James as he gives you the run down on what the doctor said, and what he had talked about with his mom. He then tries to lighting the mood, after having to give you such a gloomy report.
"I uh, finished sanding the first crib tonight. It's all ready to be painted. Any special color you was thinking doll?"
"Really! Oh James that's so wonderful. I'm so proud of you. I was thinking we would do the furniture in white and the walls a light green. Think sherbert green." You giggle at the last part, and James had missed that sound so much. With as sick as you have been, there hasn't been much use of your laugh.
"I love that idea doll, the cribs and rockers all in white, and I'll build a little dresser and paint it white as well. It's gonna look beautiful honey." He kisses your check, but notices as the worry takes over.
"I haven't gotten anything ready yet James. At this rate, the twins will be here and have an unfinished, no, a not even started room." Bucky pulls you close, kissing the top of your head.
"Honey it will all get sorted out. All in due time love. Right now the most important thing is keeping their current room safe. And then, when the doctor gives us the ok, we'll start on their permanent dwellings. You are far more important then a silly room. Heck the way Georgie carries on, we could probably stick them in with him, if need be. You should hear some of the things he thinks he will be responsible for." James chuckles as he thinks back to conversations around his work bench.
He tucks you into his side even tighter, recalling all the ideas that have fluttered about in your young sons mind. And before long, you find yourself relaxing as you giggle into the night. James never stopping until you have falling asleep against his chest.
Winifred and Rebecca decided that it only made sense for them both to come. That a way one could remain with you, while the other watched over Georgie and helped with cleaning and cooking. They would just take turns switching off so that it was an even work load between them.
Today Winifred watched Georgie, and Becca sat with you. Both women very happy with their decision. Winifred loved anytime she could spoil little Georgie rotten, and Rebecca was dying to get to spend time with you. She had new ideas about the gender of the twins and wanted to run it by you.
"So it's absolutely, with out a doubt, girls this time."
You look to Becca curiously, she came up with the wildest theories sometimes. "And what makes you say that?"
Rebecca is beaming, hoping she'd bait you in.
"I'm glad you asked. So Georgie was a peach right. Lazy like his father, but still a peach. Well that's because he was a boy and it's common knowledge boys love their mothers. Girls though are Daddy's little princess, so of course they're gonna start early driving their momma crazy. AND there are TWO of them, so double the trouble. It really is Elementary my dear." She takes her seat, looking to you with a cocky smile and you can't help but laugh.
And good lord did you need to laugh. Thank goodness for your bestfriend. She knew how to be logical, but yet ridiculous enough to throw you into a giggling frenzy. Your laugh though, set the twins off. And you were sure you are growing future circus performers, as they did their newest acrobatic act in your tummy.
"Wow look at them go. Do they always move your stomach like that?" Rebecca gets closer, her hand reaching out, pausing as she looks to you for permission. When you smile and nod, her hand is planted in a flash. The twins must notice, because they each take turns using their aunts hand as a punching bag.
"Oh my goodness, look at that. They know their Auntie already. Hi my darling girls." She whispers to your tummy.
"You are as bad as your brother." You snicker, enjoying her round eyes snapping to yours.
"He says they are girls too?" Rebecca is bouncing, you can practically see the energy coursing through her.
"Has from the very beginning. He calls them his Princesses." You can't help but smile at that.
"See great minds think a like!" She states as if that settles that, and you just roll your eyes with a giggle.
Winifred had just finished cleaning the dinning room, mop still in hand as she exits and closes the door. She'd let that floor dry then she'd apply the wax. She knew James was doing his best, but she also knew you would lose your mind if you caught sight of your floors. She sits the mop and bucket down, leaning the mop handle on the wall to balance.
She decides the living room will be next, grabbing the broom and the few cleaning supplies she will need. She begins to dust the end tables and smiles, James had been keeping up with this atleast.
"Gemaw, der you is." Georgie comes bursting into the room.
"Georgie, I thought I laid you down for a nap?" She looks to the tiny tot quizzically.
"I woke up." He shrugs, "I's a big broder."
"Oh, so big brothers don't need naps huh?" She smiles to him, as she moves towards the boy. "How did you get down here? You didn't take the stairs did you?"
"Nuh-uh, I'ms not big nuff. Enty B take me." Georgie is quick to defend, remembering what he had promised to his Daddy.
"Well aren't you such a smart boy. Well if you aren't tired do you wan't to help me clean?" Winifred figures that will make the toddler want his nap. She however, is not expecting him to clap and then hustle to pick up his toys. She finds herself again smiling, James had not been exaggerating about Georgie. He is clearly taking his big brother role very serious, and she can't help but reminisce about James, and how he had taken his big brother role just as serious.
And so go the next few months. The two ladies arriving early in the moring, Winifred insisted that they get there early enough that she could make James and Georgie breakfast, wanting both her boys to start off the morning properly. She knows you would be doing the same right now, if you were able. And though Bucky could easily fend for himself, Winifred knows he has his hands full, getting himself and Georgie up and ready for the day.
And it's that same reasoning she has a nice warm dinner waiting for James when he returns from work. She knows them enjoying a meal together is important to you, and its a good time for bounding. Several times, Rebecca and Winifred joined the Father and Son, everyone laughing around the table as they recounted the tales of their day. They had tried to have dinner in your room, but the smells of all the food was too much, and none of them wanted a re-enactment of that evening.
However, tonight when James enters his home, something seems off. As he removes his hat and then coat, hanging them both on the coat rack in the corner, he realizes there is no usual smell of dinner. He moves further into the house, the energy buzzing around him. "Ma? Becca?" His voice is trembling as he calls out.
Bucky moves towards the stairs, beginning to climb them when he hears the familiar sound of footsteps. "Oh James, I thought you might have been the Doctor. I called your office, but you must have just left. She's taken a turn for the worse, I'm going to wait by the door for the doctor.
James bounds the stairs, two at a time, as he races to get to your bedside. As he walks into your room, he is surprised by the candle light. He looks to his sister, and as if she could read his mind, she answers his question before he even asks.
"She said the lights hurt her eyes and made the headache worse, so we settled on candles."
James looks to your sleeping form, you look so pale, sweat softly glistening in the candle light. He notices the bucket still in your arms, frowning at the realization of how sick you really are.
"She hasn't been able to keep anything down today, she couldn't even find the strength to get out of bed to goto the bathroom. Mom and I basically carried her. We didn't want to over-react but we couldn't put it off anymore. She kept trying to vomit, but nothing is in her stomach, she just kept crying and crying." Rebecca barley chokes it all out before bursting into tears. James pulls his sister in for a tight hug.
"Thank you for calling, she'll be ok. The Doctor said this might happen." He tries reassuring her, "She will have to go to a hospital though. I'm not sure how long she will have to be there, I'm gonna have to have a talk with Georgie." He had hoped he wouldn't have to do this, but he has to be honest with him, that's what good dads do.
"Do you want me to come with you? I know this isn't an easy topic." Rebecca looks up at her brother, her hand making slow circles on his back.
"No, you stay here, Mom's waiting downstairs for the Doctor, and I don't want her alone incase something happens." James takes one last lingering look your way, then sighs and walks from the room. He makes the short trip to his sons room, knocking before opening the door and entering.
James isn't prepared for the look of complete worry that has over taken his son's face. It has him stopping to a halt, his heart breaking, as he realizes Georgie already knows something is wrong. "Hey Georgie, can we have a talk buddy?" James voice soft, as he addresses the tyke.
"Iz momma otay? I..I..I hurt her cry." His tiny lip trembles, and Bucky reaches him in only seconds.
"Hey, it's ok. I know you are scared, but the Doctor is coming, and he is gonna take Momma to a place that will make her feel a lot better." James is happy to see Georgie start to calm at hearing that.
"Rearry?" His small voice is barley a whisper.
"Yep. She might have to spend a little bit of time there, but they will take really good care of her. How would you like to spend the night at Grandma's house?" Georgie finally smiles at that, nodding and then moving to grab his teddy from his bed, before walking to his father and grabbing his strong hand.
The two of them walk hand in hand, down the small hallway. Bucky pauses just outside his bedroom door, "You stay right here, ok Buddy." Georgie is playing with is fingers, just like you tend to do when you want to ask him something, but are afraid. "Are you ok Georgie?"
"Can I's says bye?" He looks up at his father, using that same puppy dog look that you would use.
"Of course Buddy, let me just check that she's awake ok." James rubs his son's check, as he gently speaks to him.
"Otay, I's wait tere." Georgie nods out, putting on a brave face.
James can't help but feel proud and sad at the same time. He gives Georgie a smile and tousles his hair, then quietly makes his way into your bedroom. Rebecca and your eyes are on him as soon as he walks in. You force a small smile, and it's breaking James heart.
"Hey doll. Doctor is on the way." He walks to your beside, bending down and giving your check a soft peck. "Georgie want's to come tell you goodbye, but I told him I wanted to check first. If you aren't up for it I'll tell him you are sleeping and he'll understand. I'm gonna have him stay at Mom's tonight, that way I can come with you to the hospital." He speaks softly, remembering what Rebecca had told him about your headache.
"I want to tell him goodbye. Can you both help me get straightened up, I don't want him scared when he see's me." You are relieved to see them both nod out and then work in unison to get you sitting up, and your hair and night gown situated. "Thank you." You whisper to them both."
"Anything for my bestfriend." Rebecca smiles, James nodding in agreement.
"Of course Love, I'll go get Georgie. The Doctor should be arriving anytime now." James leaves your side to open the door, and the moment it is opened, your young son comes barreling into the room.
"Momma." He rushes to you, only stumbling a few times, before reaching you. Rebecca then scoops him into your bed, and he is immediately hugging your neck. "I's miss you." He whispers into you neck, and you feel yourself tearing up. You try and take calming breaths, not wanting to make Georgie more afraid then he already is.
"I'm gonna miss you too. So so much. But I won't be gone too long, and I will feel a lot better when I come home." You whisper back, hugging your little boy tight.
"Dats wat daddy say. An I's stay wif gemaw. You's come back ight?" Georgie pulls away and looks at you, the panic clear on his face.
You didn't want to make promises, incase god forbid something was to happen. But you also couldn't leave your little boy terrified, you needed him to feel safe. And so you tell the lie, you hope won't become one. "Of course I'll be home, you have nothing to worry about." You kiss the top of his head, as you give him one finally squeeze.
There is a sudden knock on the door, and then Winifred and the doctor walk in. "Hello, sorry to break up this party but I need to see my patient. Could you please give us the room." The Doctor speaks to no on in particular, as he makes his way across the room. You give one last hug and kiss to Georgie, before Becca grabs him gently, and everyone scurries away.
A short examination later, it was decided that it was indeed time to go to the hospital. Winnie gladly took Georgie, telling James, "I'll keep him as long as you need me too. He is no trouble and he will keep Becca and me very entertained." Then the three of them left.
You rode with the doctor, as he insisted it was for the best. So that left James to travel all alone. And the entire trip his brain blamed him. It only got worse when he arrived, and was told by the Charge Nurse, he would only be giving fifteen minutes with you each day, and it was past visiting hours.
No amount of explaining to the Nurse, that you had just arrived, and he only wanted to tell you good night then would be on his way, nothing seemed to get through to her. Either that or she was just cold hearted. She even threatened to call security if he continued to stand there.
And so with a heavy heart James left. Making the long journey back home, his mind never stopping as it bombarded him with insults. Would the nurse even let you know that he was turned away? Or would you spend the night crying, thinking he had just abandoned you? What if the stress of it all, caused even more harm to you and the babies? Why hadn't he demanded she go get your doctor, who would no doubt have put her in her place? Why had he giving up so easily?
He was a coward and you would see it that way too. If he really loved you and the babies, he would have fought tooth and nail to get to you. Would have told that so called Nurse to call security, because she would need them if she tried to stop him. But he didn't do any of that. He turned tail and ran away. Shit, what if it's his fault you were sick. The Doctor had said some people say that it's brought on by moms not wanting the baby, but what if it's really the dads who don't want them? How can he say he really want's the twins, when he gave up on you and them so easily?
All of this is his fault. He never should have pursued you when he came back home. He should have let you find a better man, let you find true happiness. If he would have just died in the war, all that would have happened. But no, some higher power thought it better to send him home. And a fine mess that's been, because now you've been harmed because of him. What good was letting him come home, if he would just lose you in the end?
As James pulls up to the two of yours home, he sighs as he parks the car. He didn't want to go into an empty house, how was he supposed to sleep without your body pressed snuggly to his? He had grown so accustomed to you always being there, your warm silky skin, soft against his fingertips. The rise and fall of your chest, lulling him to sleep. He rubs a hand down his tired face, then forces himself out of the car.
He wonders around the house for a little while, before ending up in the twin's room. As he looks about, he hopes you won't be disappointed. It wasn't exactly how you had wanted, he tried but couldn't find the color for the walls you had wanted. But he had found cream wallpaper with ice cream cones on it. And one of the colors of the ice cream was the green you had wanted, along with shades of pink, blue, and purple.
And he had made sure to paint both the rockers and cribs white, he was still finishing up the dressers, but once they were all ready, they too would be the same crisp white hue.
And his Mom and Becca had found lots of fabric in the green you had wanted on the walls. So they instead made sure all the bedding would have the beautiful tone you had been so obsessed with. They even made each twin there own patch work quilt, made up of fabrics tinged with greens and whites. But even with as much as James, his Ma, and sister loved the room, that wouldn't matter if you were not pleased.
And with how low Bucky is already feeling, the voices in his head, easily manipulated the situation. Once again making him feel like nothing but a failure. The cruel evil voices, ringing in his head, blocking out any hope of your uplifting words reaching him, as he stands alone in the cold dark night.
He couldn't even make sure the room was what you wanted. Sure he can say he tried, but did he really? Why hadn't he traveled to every store in all of New York? That's what someone who truly loved his wife and kids would do, isn't it? But he had only visited a few dozen, before giving up and instead easily being talked into the wallpaper that now coated the walls.
God you were sure to hate it. You had told him your dream for the space, and then James took your lovely vision and stomped all over it. Why did you stay with him? Surely you know you can do so much better. Why did you continue to pick and love him? He didn't deserve it, any of it. He continued to show you how undeserving he was, so why do you love him so?
It had to be pity. That's the only reason a dame like you would stay with a monster like him. He wasn't even a full man. How could he ever have thought you loved him? Love? Ha, no. No, it's obvious now, you felt sorry for him, and now you are stuck. Stuck in a marriage you never wanted, carrying the spawn of a monster, whom forced you into all of this. God how could he live with himself, knowing what he has done to you?
Tears begin to fall from James eyes, as the voices continue there vile scheme. Long lost is the strength to fight them off. Instead he lets them take over, as he walks from the twins to his bedroom. He can't even find the will to change into his pajamas, as he crawls beneath the too soft sheets. He wants to reach out for your pillow, knowing it still holds your lingering scent. But he doesn't deserve that comfort, so rather, he clings to his own and lets his sobs fill the room.
If only the next day would have brought James some joy, but no instead just more despair. After finishing work, he rushed to the hospital, only to be met by the same Charge Nurse from the evening before. Atleast this time she had a kind face, though, James could tell there was something hidden behind it.
"Mr. Barnes, I would like to apologize for my behavior last night. I took out my work frustrations on you, and that was completely unacceptable. I wanted to be the one to meet with you when you came in, because I really did want to apologize." She takes a step closer to James. "I um, unfortunately have some bad news. Your wife took a turn for the worst this morning an her visitation has been revoked because of it.
She most have sensed the panic in James, because she reached out and gently grasped his arm. "I feel terrible about preventing you from saying good night, so if you promise to keep this a secret between us, I can allow you five minutes with her. Now please understand, she doesn't look well and she is not conscious, but if you would like to still see her I will make that happen." She barley whispers out her plan, and Bucky can't nod out yes fast enough.
She hurriedly rushes him down the hall, her eyes scannning left and right, ensuring their safety in entering your room. "Here you are Mr. Barnes, I'll be back in Five minutes before next rounds begin. And again I really am so very sorry for last night." She scurries off before James has a chance to thank her for letting him see you.
He quietly opens the door, and swiftly enters the room, closing the door behind him. His eyes catch sight of you for the first time, and he isn't prepared for what he beholds. Glass bottles hang beside your bed, lines attached to them, and then contect together to a line that is inserted into your arm. You are more pale then James has ever seen, and as the Nurse had warned, you are sleeping.
He is cautious as he walks to your bedside, taking the chair nearby and placing it closer to you. He then sits, his hand reaching out to stroke yours. "I'm so sorry I wasn't here last night Honey. I wanted to be, please know that. The reasons are not important now, what is important is you getting better. Doll if you can hear me, you gotta get better. Me and Georgie can't live without you love. One night away and I'm already lost without you. Has the bed always been so big and soft? It always felt so perfect with you laying right beside me. Please love, if...if I'm the reason for all this, you have to know I love you and the twins and Georgie. I want you home, and our little family whole again. All I've ever wanted was you, you're my dream come true doll. I don't know when I'll get to see you again, they're restricting your visits because you've gotten so sick. But know I love you, and Georgie and I are waiting for you and those little princesses to come home. You can take as long as you need, but only if you promise to come home. Please doll, I love you."
He wipes the few stray tears, his hand then reaching out for yours once more. Then there is a soft knock, and the nurse is peeking in. "I'm sorry Mr. Barnes but I'm afraid it's time." She looks truly apologetic, and James just nods to her. Standing, he walks to you and kisses your hair, taking his chance to let his nose breath you in. Then he is pulling away, and following the nurse back down the hall.
"I'll call you as soon as she is allowed to have visitors. Again, I really am so so sorry." And then she leaves him, her shoes squeaking as she moves down the hall. He tries to pull himself together, he still has to get Georgie. Well, and also fill his Ma and Becca in on your current state. Hopefully they could help him find the brightside, before the darkness could completely take over.
Three weeks, it has been three weeks since you were admitted into the hospital. Three weeks without Bucky being able to see you. He had spoken to your Doctor, who continued to reassure him that things were fine, they were just keeping you relaxed for the sake of you and the babies. The doctor said your tests were all coming back better and better each time, and he said the twins were strong and didn't seem to be as effected as you had been.
Those little updates did give James hope, and with that hope he pushed on. Him and Georgie working each evening and weekend to finish the twins furniture and room. And after he had that done, they worked on finishing Georgie's rocking horse. James only hoped his penance would be enough. He only hopes that he has finally shown how much he does want you, Georgie, and the twins.
It's early, and it takes James a moment to realize why he has awoken. There is a ringing noise, and suddenly Bucky is leaping from the bed, a mad rush to reach the telephone down stairs. He listens intently, as the voice on the other end rattles off it's message. Then with a shaky hand, James hangs up the receiver.
That same shaky hand reaches out again and dials his ma's number. The call is quick, and then he rushes to unlock the front door, then it's another sprint upstairs. He dresses faster then he ever has, and then bolts back downstairs to await his mom.
He isn't sure how he ever managed to make it so fast to the hospital. Hell, James isn't sure how he got to the hospital. He remembers getting into the car, and then parking at the hospital, but nothing in between. He rushes to your floor, easily finding the nurse's station, and letting them know he had arrived. A kind Nurse, he hadn't met, takes him to a sitting area. She gives him the latest information on your condition, and then leaves to inform the Doctor of James arrival.
Bucky waited patiently, the nurses stopping by to offer him coffee or water, even little snacks. He took what they offered, but his nerves made it hard for him to eat or drink anything. And finally after several long hours of waiting the Doctor showed his tired face.
"Hello James, She and the girls are all fine. She had a hard labor though, and she did lose a lot of blood, so I want her to spend a few nights longer just to be on the safe side. But if you promise not to excite her, she is very very tired after all. Then I'll agree to letting you go see your girls." The old man smiles at James, and he jumps to answer.
"I promise sir. Scouts honor. Is she... really ok though? Give it to me straight." James still can't believe you could be ok, not after how sick you had been.
"James, she is doing fine. The rest this last few weeks, really did do wonders for her. I had planned to let you start visiting today. But then the twins had other ideas. No doubt they get that streak from you." The old man chuckles, walking to James and patting him on the shoulder. "Go see your family, I know your wife will be very happy to see you."
The nurse shows James to your room, knocking before entering. You do look exhausted, but even in such a state, you look like an angel to James. You smile as soon as you see him, looking to the two pink bundles in your arms. "Guess you was right, two perfect little Princesses."
James is beaming, and as he had hoped, they are the spitting image of you. All except those big blue eyes, the same as their brother and father. "Doll they are so prefect." He whispers out, his eyes big as he takes in their yawning form. "I'll never now how I got so lucky. Thank you for my family doll." He gives your lips a chaste peck.
"I'm the lucky one. Man of my dreams, big family I always wanted with said man of my dreams. I truly could never be happier James. I love you so much." You tear up at the end, having to clear your throat. "I hope I didn't scare you, or Georgie. How is my boy doing?"
James takes a seat next to your bed. "I'm so happy you're ok. The doctor gave me little updates, so that really helped. Georgie will be happy when you and the girls get home. I can't wait to go tell him he has two sisters. We are officially out numbered." Bucky can't help but chuckle at the end. "Have you thought of any names for our two precious girls?"
Even in your state, James can see the small blush cover your cheeks. "You might think it a little strange." You chew on your bottom lip, as you look to him.
"Never love." His face is so reassuring, that you easily find yourself giving in.
"Well since they came two months early, I was thinking we could name one after each month they missed." You look to him, waiting for the mocking to begin, but he only grins.
"Honey I love that. I'm keeping it a secret till I get to bring you and these babies home." He is smirking, and you know Rebecca is going to go crazy, if left in the dark much longer.
Six days later and James finally gets to bring you home. The twins room complete, and ready to surprise you. And surprised, you are. Your eyes fill with tears as you walk around touching everything, and smiling through tears, at the adorable wallpaper. James is beaming with pride, not only at his handy work in creating the room, but in your handy work as well, in creating his three cherished children.
Rebecca lets you take your moment, but her patients soon dwindles. "So are you ever gonna tell me what I'm to call my nieces? Or will A and B be sufficient?" Her snark has you and James bursting at the seems.
The each of you holding a twin, walk to Winnie and Becca, handing them each over as you finally announce their names to the world.
"Introducing Miss April Rebecca Barnes." James hands his sister her wide-eyed niece.
"And Miss May Catherine Barnes." You hand a smiling Winnie, her squirming granddaughter.
Both women scooting together to admire the twins identical features. "They are so perfect." Winnie is first to speak, Becca rushing to agree.
"They really are, how will I ever tell you two apart?" She coos at the little cherubs.
"We'll color code them." Winnie giggles out, you all soon following suit. Georgie laughing along as well, even though he didn't understand the joke.
Georgie never roamed fair that day. Always jumping to action, at any noise his sisters would make. Watching intently, as you and James handled them with care. Remembering each action, so he could repeat it if need be in the future. He made himself a promise that day, to always keep them safe and take care of them whatever they may need.
He fell asleep between their cribs, that night and many nights to follow. Each time, James carefully cradled him, walking the few steps to Georgie's own room, then tucking the young tot into his bed. Pulling the covers tight, as he kissed Georgie's brown unruly hair. James would smile, as he shut off the light. Ready to do this same routine the very next night.