Chapter 9
Misty finally broke the silence. "Is she okay?"
"She will be," Clint said softly. "Bad nightmare, vision, something. She was given a mission to take us out and pictured how she did it in vivid detail." He looked over at Bucky, leaning against the wall, arms crossed across his chest. Clint began sharing since the team members were accounted for, so everyone knew what Mikayla told him. "She swears she was given trigger words. I told her Shuri could check her out." Everyone heard the plates in Bucky's arm shift as he made a fist and restrained himself from punching a hole in the wall. "They called her 'specimen' and sent her on a mission to take us out, which she did. Mikayla said the images were so vivid that she swore it really happened. She described how she did it, but I won't go into those details."
"Doctor Cho and I will run more lab tests to ensure there aren't any more drugs in Mikayla's system. I think the nightmare and what she saw resulted from the Midazolam, but we'll make sure." Bruce turned and went back to the medical lab to consult with Dr. Cho.
"She wants to see we're all okay for herself, so I told her I'd send everyone in."
"Clint," Natasha spoke up. "Go take a shower and change clothes. Make yourself presentable for your wife. We've got this." She lightly shoved Clint toward the door. He took the hint and left the medical wing.
"I'll go first," Steve said, turning around before anyone could argue, then closed the door behind him. "Glad you're back, little sister."
Mikayla turned her head toward him, eyes red and swollen from all the crying. "Hey, big brother. You're okay."
Steve smiled. "I am. Even more so now that you're here." Steve sat down next to Mikayla. "What can I do for you?"
Mikayla nervously swallowed. "Can I? Can I? Need to know you're really okay."
"Where?"
"Stomach."
Steve nodded. He pulled up his t-shirt, showing Mikayla his stomach. "See, nothing." Since her hands were still bandaged, he picked up her arm and placed it against him. "Believe me?" Mikayla took a deep breath and nodded. "Good." Steve changed the subject. "Thanks for your help on the mission."
Mikayla sniffed, then spoke. "Felt good to be useful."
"What did I tell you, Agent M?"
"Agent M?" Steve asked.
"Friday's new nickname for me."
"Captain Rogers, I advised her she was useful by keeping me entertained."
Steve chuckled. Everyone in the tower loved Friday's snarkiness and personality. "I'm glad to hear she does that, Friday. It is a full-time job."
Mikayla's brow furrowed as she recalled the conversation during the mission. "I didn't think Justin Hammer was the head of AIM."
Steve leaned back and crossed his arms. "He wasn't. Hammer found out there wasn't anyone heading up the company, so he put one of his cronies in charge."
"I'm sure Tony took great pleasure in breaking up that ring."
"You know it!" Tony announced as he walked through the door. "That little pipsqueak can't hold a candle to yours truly." He marched over to Mikayla's other side. "Now, let me tell you how it went down." As he started telling Mikayla about the mission, waving his arms around in his usual grandiose manner, Steve silently exited the room.
Mikayla watched Tony without paying attention to his words; something snapped in her brain. 'I shot an arrow through his arc reactor. How the hell can he still be alive?' The more he talked, the faster she blinked her eyes, and the more she gasped for air, and she also tried to stop tears from escaping her eyes.
"Boss, I believe Agent Mikayla is having a panic attack."
Tony immediately stopped talking and turned his attention to Mikayla. "Hey, hey, Ladyhawke, stay with me."
"You're not here, not real, can't be," Mikayla frantically shook her head back and forth, trying to get the wrong thoughts out of her brain.
Tony began doing what he'd seen Clint do during prior attacks. He gently massaged her temples and whispered, "You're here, Mikayla. I'm here. This is real."
"H-how?" Mikayla stuttered.
"Mind's playing tricks on you. I assure you, I'm fine. Open your eyes, Mikayla." She continued shaking her head, refusing to obey Tony. Another coping mechanism came to his mind. "OK, let's try this. What three things do you smell?"
Mikayla's breathing slowed as she tried to concentrate and focus on answering Tony's question. "Antiseptic, bleach, Axe deodorant. Did you turn into a teenager while I was gone?"
Tony snorted. "Enough from the peanut gallery. What do you feel?"
"Your hand, the bed, the IV."
"Excellent. Now, what do you hear?"
"You, the TV, machines beeping."
"Getting a passing grade so far. What about taste?"
"Blood, salt, water."
"Thank goodness. I hoped you wouldn't go for blood, sweat, and tears, though they are an outstanding rock group." Tony looked and saw Mikayla grin. "Now for the tough one. What do you see? Sorry, you'll have to open your eyes for this one."
Mikayla tentatively opened her eyes, then blinked a few times to focus. "TV, machines," she replied, then forced herself to look over at Tony, smiling when he saw he indeed was there and all in one piece. "You. You, Tony, you. I didn't hurt you."
Tony smiled. "No, you didn't, Maid Marian. No, you didn't." He lightly squeezed Mikayla's arm. "Think you're up to seeing the rest of the team?"
Mikayla nodded. "Think I've met my allotment of panic attacks for the moment."
Tony bent over, kissed Mikayla's forehead, then stood. "Oh, I heard you've decided to keep your hands rather than let me build you two perfectly perfect engineered and state-of-the-art hands."
That made Mikayla chuckle. "Sorry, Tony. I'm kind of attached to these." She lifted her bandaged hands.
"Don't say I didn't offer." Tony squeezed her arm again, then left the room, holding the door open for the rest of the team to enter.
Bucky, Natasha, and Thor came through the door. "My dear Mikayla! I am so pleased to have you back. I checked in with my friends, and they assured me no one breached the perimeter of the tower."
"Thanks, Thor, and tell your friends thank you for me." Mikayla lifted a hand and placed the back of it on Thor's chest. "Are you okay?"
"Never better, my friend. Are you comfortable with sharing with us?"
"I'm going to have to get it out of my system, so here goes. I shoved Mjolnir through your chest cavity." Mikayla tried to be tough but fought tears from leaking out of her eyes.
"Oh, my precious sister, please don't take this wrong, but I don't believe you would be able to lift Mjolnir, so there's no fear of that happening."
"I know, it just seemed so real."
"Dreams and visions can sometimes seem that way, especially when thrust upon us by forces beyond our control," Thor said. "However, I give you my word that we are all fine and healthy."
Mikayla nodded. "I'll, I'll do my best to believe that." Thor smiled and patted her arm, then stepped back to allow her to speak to the other two in the room.
"Your, your arm," Mikayla motioned toward Bucky. "You've still got it. I didn't rip it off?"
Bucky smiled. "Nope. I'll let you try after you've healed from your surgeries, if it'll help." He pulled on it with his right hand. "See, it doesn't just pop out." Bucky leaned down. "We'll get them, Mikayla. I promise you. We will make sure the bastards who took you will never do this again."
Mikayla bit her lip to keep from crying. "I know, thanks."
"Welcome. I'll be back later." Bucky smiled again, then he and Thor left.
"So, guess this means I didn't strangle you or rip Sam's wings off."
"Strange as it sounds, it wouldn't be the first time that those things happened to us. Plus, I don't think Misty would let you get away with that." Natasha grabbed a styrofoam cup and gave Mikayla some ice chips. "Shuri is still here, so Doctor Cho is talking to her. You need to rest."
After letting the ice chips melt in her mouth, Mikayla spoke. "I can't. Every time I close my eyes, I see it all again. How can it seem so real if it didn't happen?"
"It's the drugs. Evil people make drugs to control good people or turn good people into evil people. When those people start experimenting with drug combinations, nothing good comes from it."
"OK, I get that. How do you deal with separating what you know is real from what you're not sure is? Honestly, I don't care if I ever sleep again at this point. I'm tired of fighting my own mind."
Natasha put a hand on Mikayla's arm. "I found touch seemed to help. When I start to spiral, the fact that someone's touching me reminds me what the truth is and what my mind is trying to convince me is truth." She squeezed Mikayla's arm. "Get some rest. I'll keep everyone except bird brain away." Mikayla nodded and closed her eyes, Natasha staying by her side until Clint appeared.
"Thanks, Tasha," Clint said as he walked into the room, sitting across from Natasha. "How is she?" Clint looked down and began wiping Mikayla's bangs off her brow.
"Tired of struggling with her mind. She's trying to separate reality from what the drugs planted in her brain. She's scared to sleep. Told her touch grounded me."
"Good suggestion." Clint nodded, remembering multiple missions that ended up with one (or both) of them injured. In situations where just one of them was the injured party, the other would be close by, either sitting beside their bedside or lying in bed.
"What took you so long? Don't tell me you got lost on the way back here."
"That'll never happen, unfortunately. I was following up on some leads that might help her."
"T'Challa?"
Clint shook his head. "Not one I was checking out, but I did see him in the hallway. He's certain they'll be able to help her." He sat down on Mikayla's bed, continuing to stroke her face. "Tash, I just want her back. I know underneath is my strong, sarcastic, kick-ass wife." Clint looked over at Natasha, eyes shining with unreleased tears. "I hurt so much for her. I hate that I can't protect her from everything. Hell, it doesn't seem like I can protect her from anything." He put his head back down, focusing on anything but Mikayla.
"Clint." Natasha put her hand under his chin and raised his head, forcing Clint to stay focused on her. "She knows that and still chose to marry you. Mikayla knows you can't always protect her and knows you're not responsible." Natasha squeezed his chin. "We'll be her strength. That's how we can help her. Tony has Friday searching for the assholes, and you know he won't stop until they're found, then that's when we end them for good, OK?" Clint nodded. "Now, tell me about those leads you mentioned."