Car Rides
Chapter Five:
Car Rides
To Alla's astonishment, she got her targets alone. And god, she was scared shitless. Her plan could go absolutely right, or it could go terribly wrong.
She had followed them through the mall as the adults tried to lose the STRIKE Agents off their tails. Little did they know that one of the most deadly child assassins were on their trail instead. They walked past the vending machines, past benches and electric chairs that were weird and overpriced. Past food vendors and small pop-up stores that sold little toys and trinkets.
Thinking better than to use the lousy pistol that Rumlow gave her, Alla discarded the weapon in a nearby trash bin, making sure that it fell deep into the trash. If her plan were to go correctly, then she wouldn't need the gun. But still, that didn't help the feeling of anxiety crawl up her throat and stay there. She had to push through.
Alla followed quietly behind them, staying a long way behind them so they wouldn't get suspicious. Her thoughts were swimming as she watched the Captain and Widow from afar. They were looking back every so often, suspicious of their surroundings. But Alla wanted out. She wanted out from Hydra, she wanted out from the Red Room. She wanted to be that little girl again. Even though she knew all of that was not real. That her childhood was her first mission. She knew now, that she was older, that none of her childhood was hers. It was never going to be hers. She was never going to be that innocent little girl again.
Alla was a cold-blooded killer. She murdered people and did it without question. But she wanted out. And the only way out was to be captured by the enemy. So as soon as her two targets left the premises of the building, Allah pounced. She went after the Captain first, knowing he would be less detrimental to fight than the Black Widow. She was infamous for being the only Widow to escape the Red Room. Alla fought the Captain, it was a fury of movements. The Captain was startled by Alla's attack, quickly grabbing her shoulders and keeping her in place.
Alla struggled, feeling anxiety pool in her stomach. She tried to ignore the feeling—the very funny feeling in her chest and stomach. This is what she wanted. She wanted to be caught. Alla wanted out. And the only way to get out alive was to get caught. The only way to get her Papa out was to get caught. Then he'd come to get her, and the Captain would help him. Because that is who he was as a person. The Captain was a hero. And he'd see Alla for who she is.
A child who was stuck in a sticky place, killing to stay alive. He'd see how she didn't have a choice, nor wanted to even kill anyone.
"I want out!" Alla cried, jutting her shoulders in the Captain's grasp. It was a tight hold, enough for her to move, but not escape. She had her back to the Captain's chest, Black Widow before her, staring the younger girl down.
"What do you mean, you want out?" The Widow asked, her perfect eyebrows furrowed.
Alla scoffed as the Captain tightened his hold. "I'm telling you, I want out. I want out of Hydra and their hell hole. I want to help you take them down."
Alla could feel the Captain tense up, she could see the Black Widow pause, a flicker of surprise on her face. The Widow paused, nodding her head to the Captain. The Captain reluctantly released his hold on the tall girl. Alla stood where she was, her stance open and relaxed. She wasn't a threat, she wanted to help them. She really did. But she knew the Captain and Widow would be skeptical.
"I'm serious." Alla amended, looking behind her to the Captain, who had a look of utter disbelief mixed with skepticism. He was a handsome fellow Alla observed, even with his face all screwed up in a scowl. "This isn't some sort of trick, either—"
"Sure it is." The Captain bit out.
"Okay, Mr. Sassy Pants," Alla scoffed, rolling her eyes. "Look, there are STRIKE Personnel following you. I managed to throw them off your trail, but they're stupid. So by dumb luck they could catch you—"
"What do you get out of this?" Black Widow asked jutting out her chin to Alla, the random girl who looked oddly familiar to her. The familiarity made The Widow's chest clenched, but she brushed it off. For now at least.
"I want out, I already told you. That is all I want." Alla said in a thick Russian accent. There was no conversation for a moment, a silence that Alla couldn't hear between the two adults and child between them. They were standing in a triangle, Alla being the point, the Widow and Captain standing side by side, their arms crossed, similar expressions on their faces. The Widow looked like she wasn't buying it. Like she was calling utter BS on the younger girl, just by looking at her.
Alla groaned, turning around to look behind her. To make sure no one was following her too. She couldn't get caught. Not right now. She needed to leave before Rumlow or some other Agent found her. Because then she'd go back to square fucking one, being trapped in the cell again. Maybe thrown in cryostasis. Or maybe tortured fuckign senseless. Alla didn't want this. Not one bit. She needs to convince the Captain and Black Widow right now, or everything would go to shit.
"If I get caught, it will not end well for me. So why would I be standing here, lally gagging with the enemy—with my targets—just to wait here for Rumlow to haul my ass back to Hydra to get beaten senseless?"
"Language," The Captain said after a moment.
Alla stared at the man incredulously, her eyebrows raised.
The Widow looked at the Captain from the corner of her eye, shooting him a look. She sighed and shook her head. "Fine. But you're staying right beside me. And no funny business. We have no time for your crap."
* * *
Alla was surprised she was sitting in the back seat of a truck with both her targets conversing. This felt like a dream. Like this wasn't actually happening. Like the Captain and Widow were not sitting in the driver's seat, or in the passenger seat. Alla had to keep pinching the fat between her thumb and pointer finger to remind her this is actually happening.
The Captain had jumped a random truck in the mall parking lot, with Alla and the Widow keeping watch. As soon as he said, "It's all set," The Widow gently took Alla's elbow in hers, and opened the passenger's back seat door for Alla, instructing her to sit. Alla did as she was told, only because she didn't want to be on their bad side.
It's not like the adults had the option to drop her off at Shield without getting caught, so they were stuck with her. Whether they liked it or not.
Alla felt utterly triumphant.
This was the next step to her freedom, many more were up next, though. Alla had to keep reminding herself that.
To Alla's surprise though, the Captain and Widow were fairly comfortable with Alla's presence. She hasn't pounced on either one of them, even if there was an opening. Alla did seem to be telling the truth. But who would even lie about being in Hydra?
Every few minutes, the Captain would glance back to her through the rearview mirror. By the tenth time, Alla had gotten fed up. "What?" She bit out, a scowl on her face. "Why do you keep looking at me? It's not like I'm going to shoot you or something." Alla scoffed, rolling her eyes.
"You won't, will you?" Captain asked darkly, his eyebrow raised.
Alla shut her trap, her mouth a straight line. She sighed and looked out the window. She could see in the corner of her eye, Captain still speaking to her, but she ignored him. She didn't feel like reading anyone's lips, let alone carrying on a conversation.
The Widow turned around in her seat, looking back to Alla. "Did you hear him?"
Alla shook her head. "No I didn't. I'm deaf, I thought you could already tell that, Black Widow." Alla sighed, meeting her blue and green eyes at the older woman.
The Widow looked skeptical, but seemed as if everything made sense now. She didn't say a word for a moment, sharing a look with the Captain. "Okay, we're all good here with this hostility here. We aren't going to ship you back to Hydra, and we aren't going to hurt you. So you can drop the 'big girl' act." The Widow declared, nodding her head. She shifted in her seat to sit forward.
After a moment of Alla scoffing, the Widow turned around once more. "And put your seatbelt on."
Alla did so begrudgingly. She sighed and rested her head on the cool window, watching the trees appear and disappear as they made their way to New Jersey. The ride seemed to be going excruciatingly long, just hours and hours of Alla staring at the scenery. She felt oddly safe in the car, though. Considering everything that Hydra has told her about the Captain and the Widow. They seem to have absolutely nothing in common.
Hydra told Alla that the Captain was a rude, brutal, and terrifying man with his shield. That the moment you cross him, you'll be dead. But the Captain disproved that when Alla purposely bumped into him. He was actually very kind, despite Alla's fears.
The Widow, however, had some similarities to what Hydra had told her. But yet she seemed kinder. Even though she was cold and distant, the Widow still proved how kind she is by not killing Alla right then and there. Or even sending her back to Shield and Hydra. Instead, Alla sits in the backseat, wondering if everything Hydra and the Red Room fed her was even true one bit. What if they were just...lying to her constantly? Does that mean they were lying to her Papa too?
Alla was spiraling, she was going down a rabbit hole of questions, fears, and possibly loyalties. Alla was never really loyal to Hydra or the Red Room. She never wanted to live like this. But she was born into this world, left with The Red Room, and soon became Dreykov's favorite little girl. She just did what she was told as a little girl, because she didn't know any better. Now, she still doesn't know any better. But she does know how killing and torturing makes her feel. She knows what Hydra has done to her Papa, how it makes him feel. How he fought so hard to not kill people, to keep them away from her.
Now is her time to repay him for everything he has done for her.
It's the least she could do for him. Since he is already long gone, and now replaced with the Winter Soldier.
Now she's going to do everything she can to fight for him. To defy Hydra and the Red Room. To be like her Papa. It's the least she could do.
⧗
Natasha Romanof was a woman of her word. She was truthful—to a certain extent—when need be. And now seems to be a time where she is truthful. Whether it's with herself, or with Steve. Moreso with herself right now. And she was scared shitless.
Because this little girl sitting in the backseat is her daughter.
Who died twelve years ago.
Natasha felt sick to her stomach. She felt like her whole life was a ruse. Like everything she has done to get rid of her bleeding ledger, is coming back full circle to haunt her. Like everything she has done for Shield and the Avengers has been a ploy, a grand scheme of the Red Room.
And deep down, she thinks that she knew about it the whole time. She just thought she was telling the right lies.
But she was wrong.
She should have known she was wrong on day one, when Shield had asked about her dead daughter. No one was supposed to know about her death. Let alone know that the infamous Black Widow could have been a mother.
That she would have enjoyed being a mother, and would have loved to care for a child. The child that was sitting in the backseat, just behind her.
The Widow needed to distract herself. She can't think about how her past is coming to haunt her. That the Winter Soldier is alive, that he is still himself. The man she had met fourteen years ago, still alive. Most Likely caring for the young copper haired girl. It made sense though. That he was alive. That she was alive. That Madame B had been lying the whole time. It made sense why Natasha left, why she had left in 2008. Why she had bombed Dreykov and his daughter not that long ago. To prove, she was done.
To prove that she was no longer Natalia Alianovna Romanov.
She is now Natasha Romanoff.
An Avenger. A friend. But is this all a lie? Is she just lying through her teeth like she has done since she was little? All she is, is a liar, a fake, a coward.
She just left her. Left Yelena, left Galina, left James.
That's all she does is run.
She runs away from her problems. Away from the people who she's cared most for.
But that isn't Natasha anymore. That was Natalia. And Natalia died the same day as Dreykov did. She had proved to Clint and to Fury that she was no longer the Red Room's pawn, nor the KGB's. And they trusted her. She trusted them.
⧗
"Where did Captain America learn how to steal a car?" Natasha asked, speaking into the silence with a small smirk on her face.
Steve sighs, nodding his head. "Nazi Germany." He adjusts in his seat, glandign over to Natasha, noticing how she's sitting. "And we're borrowing. Take your feet off the dash."
Natasha does so, sitting correctly in the passenger seat. With a small smirk on her face, she asks, "Alright, I have a question for you, oh, which you do not have to answer. I feel like if you don't answer it though, you're kind of answering it, you know?"
"What?" Steve asks exasperatedly.
"Was that your first kiss since 1945?" Natasha asks, a blinding smirk on her face. She may or may not be making fun of him. But it doesn't matter, she just wanted to see Steve get so flustered.
Steve scoffs, shaking his head. "That bad, huh?"
"I didn't say that." Natasha defends.
"Well, it kind of sounds like that's what you're saying." Steve replies quickly, seeming offended.
"No, I didn't." Natasha replies just as quickly, denying him. "I just wondered how much practice you've had."
"You don't need practice." Steve declines.
Natasha has a smile on her face. "Everybody needs practice."
"It was not my first kiss since 1945. I'm ninety-five, I'm not dead."
Natasha stared at Steve, a look on her face. "Nobody special, though?" Natasha asks quietly. Like this was a solemn and bittersweet topic. Steve chuckles, shaking his head as a no.
Steve scoffs at Natasha's words. "Believe it or not, it's kind of hard to find someone with shared life experience." One hand on the wheel, he glances back in the rearview mirror to see Alla staring off into space, lost in thought. He sighs, again. Steve doesn't know how to feel about their new addition.
"Well, that's alright, you just make something up." Natasha suggests, perking up a bit.
"What, like you?" Steve says before he can even think. He turns to look Natasha in the eye.
"I don't know. The truth is a matter of circumstances, it's not all things to all people all the time. And neither am I."
"That's a tough way to live." Steve counters.
Natasha pauses, piercing her lips. "It's a good way not to die, though."
"You know, it's kind of hard to trust someone when you don't know who that someone really is." Steve looks Natasha in the eye, wondering how someone could live like that their whole life.
"Yeah." Natahs agrees, her voice soft. "Who do you want me to be?"
"How about a friend?"
Natasha laughs softly, looking in out the window for a moment. She sighs, "Well, there's a chance you might be in the wrong business, Rogers."
Their conversation pauses for a moment, just two adults thinking. They still have an hour or so of traffic left on their drive to Wheaton NJ. The sun was already starting to lower, but not so much. They still had some daylight left in the day.
"What are we going to do about our little friend back there?" Steve finally asks, his eyes ahead on the road.
Natasha swallows. She didn't want to talk about this. Not now. Not ever. And definitely not with Steve, one of her best friends. She clears her throat. "Well, we can't exactly bring her back. That'd just be cruel."
"I wasn't saying we'd bring her back." Steve responds. "She looks familiar though. Her hair or instance," Steve chuckles, staring back in the rearview mirror at Alla.
Natasha looks out the window. She has to tell him. He deserves to know.
"Did you happen to get her name?" Steve finally asks, the silence unbearable. He knows that Natasha needs to say something. That somehow, this girl is important to her. He knew the moment they saw each other when the younger girl said she wanted out. It all made sense. And anyways, she looks like a spitting image of Natasha. He was starting to piece things together, but Steve wanted Natasha to tell him herself, instead of lying to him. "Natasha?"
"She's mine." Natasha whispers. Like being quiet would even matter.
Steve halted.
It was like he was buffering, staring ahead. He knew the girl meant something to Natasha by the way she was acting, but her child? Now that's—that's unbelievable. But it all made sense, her hair, her looks, her attitude.
There was silence between the two.
Natasha stole a glance back to Alla. She was dozing off, her mouth open, her eyes fluttering shut. She tried to keep herself awake, but was failing miserably.
"Yeah...um, she's my little girl. I uh, thought she had died, but I guess I was wrong." Natasha lets out a harsh scoff. "Mother of the year award goes to me, I guess. Right?"
Steve looks at Natasha—really looks at her—taking in her appearance. The two girls looked almost identical, except for the girl's freckles, her two colored eyes, and her chin. She looked like someone else. Those features must be from her father. Whether she has one, Steve doesn't know. He didn't want to pry much. He'll take any information he can get on Natasha and the girl, but he won't pry. He wouldn't be a very good friend for doing that. "What's her name?" Steve whispered.
"Galina." Natasha whispered back.
Steve nods silently, looking back at the road. They were stopped at a red light.
"That's a very pretty name," Steve compliments.
He leaves a silence after his answer, giving time to Natasha to collect her thoughts. She'll either tell him more, or this is the end of the conversation. Either way, he's glad to know the girl's name now. Knowing that Natasha was her mother, everything made sense now. Why she wanted out of Hydra, why she was even in Hydra. His heart hurt to know that his best friend's child had to live in that type of environment, that she had to go through all kinds of crap just to survive. From what little he knew about Nat's past, he had a sneaking suspicion that Galina went through something similar to Natasha.
It all made sense. How she was able to blend into the crowd perfectly, how she was able to throw the STRIKE Agents off their tail, how she was able to fool Steve and possibly Natasha, acting like a preteen girl who's just clumsy. It all made sense.
"Yeah, I thought so too," The light turned green, and Steve drove down the street, going straight for a while.
