Tony
Tony was definitely not in the mood to be having this conversation with Natasha. He’s already been worried sick for days about the kid and feeling immensely guilty. He got in a fight with Rhodey about it and now yet another person invades his personal space to tell him how stupid he’s being. Why can no one understand what he’s trying to say? Peter doesn’t need him. He needs someone much more stable and capable than he ever will be.
After his call with CPS, he’d done everything he possibly could to not storm into Peter’s foster family’s house guns blazing and take him away. It wasn’t his responsibility anymore. He’d passed it on when he made that call.
Then, just a few hours later, Natasha storms in like she owns the place and starts berating him. Of course he’s angry.
That anger is immediately completely gone when he tells Natasha the truth about how he’s feeling, and in the silence afterwards, he hears a quiet cry and the sound of footsteps running down the hallway.
He closes his eyes and exhales slowly, processing what he had just done.
“I….just….majorly fucked up. Didn’t I.”
Natasha looks livid. “Are you talking about just right now? Or pretty much everything you’ve done to lead up to now? Because the answer is yes to both.”
Tony sighs and falls into the nearest chair, burying his head in his hands. What has he done. Peter was not supposed to hear any of that.
Natasha taps him on the shoulder, prompting him to look up at her. She’s looking at him with pity instead of anger now.
“You better go fix this before it get any worse.” She says, nodding towards the hallway. “You have some apologies to make.”
Tony nods. She’s right. He just did something bad. Very bad. So unbelievably horrible that he still can’t believe that its actually happening. His anger has completely dissipated to make room for the guilt. He’s really fucked this whole thing up. Peter has been abused by the people who are supposed to take care of him for probably the past year and hasn’t said anything. And now the man who he has been looking at as a father has just said that he doesn’t want to be that. He needs to go apologize and explain himself. Peter needs to at least know that it’s not his fault, it’s entirely Tony’s.
He stands up and makes his way to the elevator to follow Peter down to the lab, where he knows he would be without even asking Friday.
When he walks through the door, Peter is leaning over a lab table, fingers splayed out , tense, over the surface. Tony can hear him crying from the other end of the room and can barely live with knowing that he caused the kid this pain.
“Peter-“ he takes one step forward before Peter turns around looking absolutely furious. Tony stops immediately where he is and holds up his hands like he means no harm.
“Just…don’t.” The boy says through tears. “I don’t want to hear anything else you have to say right now. I’ve heard enough.”
“Peter, bud.” Tony begins, trying to convey in his voice how sorry he is. “I didn’t intend for you to hear any of that. I never would have said it had I known you were listening.”
“How is that supposed to make it any better?!” Peter demands. “It doesn’t matter that you didn’t know I was there! You still said it, so you must mean it. You can’t just try to talk your way out of this!”
Peter slams his fist down on the desk as he speaks, and large cracks sprout out from where his hand meets the surface. Tony doesn’t think Peter even notices he did it.
“It does matter!” Tony defends. “It does! I only said that to get those Natasha off my back. It’s not that I don’t care about you, or don’t want you around. I…I do. Of course I do. Of course I care about you, Peter. That’s why I did what I did.”
Peter nods, but his pissed off expression never changs. “Right, Right, of course. You called CPS on my foster family out of care and compassion, right? Because if you really cared about me, you would’ve just talked to me! Like a human being! Instead of going behind my back to meddle in my life! If you would’ve just sat me down and asked me about it and genuinely cared about my well-being, then I would’ve just told you like I told Rhodey! Actually, I’m lucky I was here to hear all this because I thought at first that he was the one who betrayed me, but of course it was you all along!”
Tony is completely taken aback. “Betrayed?!” He yells back. “I betrayed you? By calling CPS when I thought you were being abused? Please tell me, Peter, why you think I betrayed you for trying to get you away from your horrible home life?!”
“Because CPS is never the answer! Don’t you know that by now?!” Peter asks accusingly, tears still steaming down his face. “Do you know how many horrible foster homes I’ve been in by now? I’ve literally lost count. And the foster system has placed me with every single one of those families. Places where I get fucking sexually harassed regularly, or get cigarette butts burned into my skin, or get beaten every single day! The foster system put me in all these places where I was tortured and legally could not get away. At least the Pattersons are manageable! What’s next?!”
Tony clenches his teeth together the whole time Peter speaks. “Look, kid, I’m sorry about CPS, I really am. I didn’t think about how you would feel about it, and I’m sorry.” It really takes a lot out of him to apologize when he’s this pissed off, but he knows Peter deserves it.
“What exactly should I have done to get you out of there, then? Because you can’t stay with people who are hurting you, and you can’t stay here!”
Peter’s face completely drops from anger to devastation. Is what Tony said really that upsetting?
Peter swallows thickly before asking, “why not? I just…maybe I was misreading the whole thing, but I kind of thought you liked having me around.” The tears were silently streaming down Peter’s face to no end, the kid not even bothering to try wiping them away.
Tony’s heart completely drops out of his chest. “Because, kiddo, part of what I was saying upstairs is true. I would ruin you. It’s in my blood. Stark men are made of iron. I could never be a father, especially not by choice.”
“You may not ever be a father by choice, but you’re already a father! You can’t just run away from that!” Peter screams, pulling at his hair with frustration.
Tony sighs. This is exactly what he was afraid of. “Peter, kid, I know you may see me like that-“
Peter’s hands are wrapped so tightly around the already cracked countertop that when Tony starts speaking, a huge chunk breaks off in Peter’s hands. The boy throws it straight at the back wall with a loud distressed scream.
Tony involuntarily takes a step back.
“Just shut up! I’m not telling you that I see you as a father figure! I’m trying to tell you that I am your son!”
Tony’s eyes widen. What did Peter just say? Is he going delirious with anger? Tony is about to ask him to clarify when Peter continues, no longer screaming, just sounding hopeless.
“You’re my actual, biological father.” Peter lets out a sad, wet chuckle. “All the times I imagined telling you, it never went anything like this.”
Tony takes a deep breath and tries to process what he’s hearing.
“Peter, I’m not sure you’re really in the right frame of mind to be-“
“Do you ever just listen?!” Peter interrupts, clearly getting more and more frustrated. “Do a fucking paternity test for all I care!” Peter yanks out a few strands of hair and drops them on the desk to make his point. “I’m your son, and as much as you may hate it, as much as you wish it didn’t happen, you can’t change that!”
Tony can’t believe this. Either Peter is completely delusional, or he’s been lying to Tony for who knows how long.
“How long?” Tony asks quietly after a moment, showing no emotions.
Peter has mostly calmed down now that the secret was out.
“I found out a few weeks after we met. Ned set the whole thing up. I had nothing to do with it. He did one of those stupid ancestry websites.”
Tony can’t focus on anything except how Peter, who may or may not be his biological son, has apparently known since right after they met all those months ago and has been hiding it from him since then.
He walks over to the nearest table and sits down, burying his face in his hands. How on earth is he supposed to process this information with Peter here and already mad at him.
“Peter,” Tony says stiffly, making up his mind. “I think you should leave.”
Peter’s face scrunches up in confusion. “What? You want me to…go?”
Tony’s face shows no emotion. He’s feeling so many emotions right now that it’s all just too much. He just needs a little time alone to get his thoughts together before discussing this.
“Yes, Peter. I want you to go.” He answers stoically.
Tony’s resolve almost breaks when he sees the look on Peter’s face. The absolute devastation and heartbreak is evident. He wants to take everything back and wrap Peter up in his arms and work everything out right here and now, but he just can’t let go his own anger and feeling of betrayal at being lied to. He just needs some time.
Peter opens his mouth like he was going to try to argue, before closing it again and hustling out of the lab.
“Friday, lab on lockdown please.”
Tony is going to take some time to himself, and then he’ll talk to Peter later. He just needs some time.
-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
Tony has no idea how long he’s been in his lab. He doesn’t even know if it’s day or night at this point. Pepper tries to come get him at some point, but he barely even recognizes that Friday is talking to him. He never reactivated her ability to get into his locked down lab once they started dating again. She’ll probably be angry with him, but he doesn’t have it in himself to care right now.
He ran Peter’s DNA as soon as the kid left, and it’s a match. He wasn’t lying. Peter is his biological son, and he’s been lying about it for months. He looks at pictures of Peter’s mother that Friday finds for him somewhere online, mostly scientific journals and news articles. There’s not much, but she doesn’t look familiar. It would’ve been one night 15 years ago anyway. He had so many of those. Why would he remember this one? Friday does some research and apparently they attended some conference together once. The dates match up perfectly to Peter’s birthday. She never tried to contact him, at least not that he knows about.
He spends some time destroying things, some time fixing things, and all his time trying to process his conversation with the kid, his kid.
He’s just so stuck on why Peter never told him the truth. He kind of understands why the kid didn’t say anything in the beginning. They didn’t exactly hit it off right away. But what about after that? Why keep it hidden for so long? Tony thought they had a good thing going for a while. Didn’t Peter trust him? Was he afraid of how Tony would react?
This all means that when Peter called him Dad that one day, it wasn’t because he had chosen Tony as a father figure. It was because he already knew that Tony was his father. Somehow that makes the whole thing worse. At least if Peter had chosen to view Tony like that, it had meant that Tony had done something to make Peter want that. Like maybe he had earned the title somehow. Now he doesn’t know what to think.
He was still lost in his thoughts when his lab doors slid open despite the lockdown. He sighs to himself. There’s only one person allowed in during lockdown, and he was not happy to see him.
“If it isn’t Peter’s partner in crime.” Tony announces, standing up to face the man. “Have you come to tell me some other lie that Peter has concocted? Betray me in some other way? Or are you finally here for me? Your best friend since college!”
Rhodey just looks very confused and taken aback. “I thought we talked about this the other day, Tony. Peter is probably on his way to talk to you right now. I’m here as moral support for the both of you. All the secrecy will make a lot more sense when he gets here.”
“He better fucking not be on his way.” Tony practically growls out. “He came by Thursday night. Told me everything.”
Rhodey’s eyes widen in shock. “Like…everything everything?”
Tony slams his hand down on the desk in frustration. “If by that you mean the fact that Peter is my biological son and he’s been hiding it from me for almost the entire time we’ve known each other, then yes! Everything! And you’ve been keeping it from me for days! How could you hide something like that from me? You should’ve told me when you found out!”
“It wasn’t my secret to tell.” Rhodey insists, voice soft. “Peter never would’ve trusted me again if I told you. We made a deal. I would keep his secret for a couple days while he figured out how to tell you. He was naturally pretty anxious about the whole thing, with good reason I guess if this is how you reacted. You better not been angry with the kid over something he couldn’t help.”
“You bet your ass I was angry!” Tony yells. “He lied to me about being my literal son, Rhodey. How can you not see how big of a deal this is?”
“Of course it’s a huge deal, Tony.” Rhodey responds placatingly. “You have a son. That’s a huge deal. But it’s not Peter’s fault. Have you considered this from his side?”
“What does his side have to do with anything?” Tony asks, scoffing. “He lied. He gained my trust, and then he broke it. What’s next? Was he just trying to scam me for my company? For money?”
Rhodey looks at him like he can’t believe what he’s hearing. “Tony, you know that’s not true. Peter would never do that. You’re his father and he loves you, no matter how much you want to deny that. He was scared of how you would react.”
“Why would he be afraid of me?” Tony asks, tone softening again and sitting back down in his stool. “He knows me. Have I ever done anything that would make him think he couldn’t trust me, or that he should be afraid of me?”
Rhodey sits down next to him. “It wasn’t you, Tony. The kid’s had a hard life. He told me a lot about it the other day. How he hasn’t had an adult he could trust in so long that it took him a long time to learn to fully trust you, and when he finally did, he couldn’t convince himself that telling you the truth was worth losing you. Especially because he told me you told him directly that you never wanted children. How was he supposed to tell you after that? He was convinced that you would hate him just for being related to you.”
Tony swallows thickly. “He…uh…told you all that?”
Rhodey nods sadly. “Yeah, he did. I figured he would’ve explained it all to you when he told you. Did he not?”
“No,” Tony replies. “He didn’t really get a chance.”
“Tony?” Rhodey asks calmly. “What exactly happened when Peter told you the truth on Thursday?”
Tony groans loudly. “He overheard me arguing with Natasha that she needed to stop telling me that I was acting like Peter’s father, and I definitely said some things I shouldn’t have. I followed him down here afterwards, and he was really upset. I tried to talk to him about why I couldn’t be his father figure, and he told me that I didn’t get a choice whether or not I wanted to be his father figure, because I was his actual father. And I was just having so much trouble processing it, Rhodes. I couldn’t think, and then…”
Rhodey waits patiently for him to finish.
“I kicked him out, Rhodey. I don’t know what I was thinking. I was just so angry that he’d been lying to me, and I told him to leave.
The look Rhodey gives him was murderous. “Your intern, a kid that you absolutely adore, who has been through hell and back in the last few years, finally admitted to you his biggest secret, and you kicked him out?!”
“I never intended on it being forever!” Tony tries to defend himself. “I just needed some time on my own to process the information! You know how huge this is, Rhodey. Of course I care about Peter, but I can’t be his father! I tried to explain this to him, that I would ruin him, but he kept trying to convince me anyway!”
“Of course he tried to convince you! For a literal genius, Tony, you are the biggest dumbass I’ve ever met!” Rhodey jumps up from his stool in frustration, looking like he’s holding back punching Tony in the face.
“Peter looks at you as a parental figure completely separate from your shared DNA! You’ve been parenting him for months! And you’ve been doing a damn good job of it! He hasn’t had a stable home life in years. He’s been abused by every foster parent he’s ever had, including the current ones. You have been the only stability in his life since the rest of his family died. You’re just so fucking afraid of the word ‘father’ that you can’t see past it! You’re so afraid of becoming Howard, that it’s turning you into him even though you have never once acted like that man before in the past! Now, get your head out of your ass, and go take some responsibility for your kid!”
Tony stares at Rhodey in horror for a moment. The man is fuming. Tony has never seen him this mad before, and the worst part is that Rhodey is absolutely right. Tony has been an idiot. He’s been so focused on how much better Peter would do with someone else as a father figure, that he had created this delusion that he would be able to find one even though Tony was the only one he’d been relying on this entire time. Peter hadn’t meant to lie to him, he just couldn’t lose the one person he could actually go to for help. Tony feels like the biggest asshole in the world.
Right here and now he’s making a decision. He’s going to get over his own shit, and step up and be there for his kid. When Peter needed him before, he stepped up. He stopped drinking, started being more responsible, and even started working again. Now the kid needs him to be more, and he’s going to do it. As afraid as he is of being a bad father, he’s Peter’s only option, and Peter deserves the best.
He stands up as soon as he makes up his mind. “I need to see him.”
Rhodey clasps Tony on the back and the both hurry for the door.
“Friday, can you find Peter for me?” Tony asks in the elevator, while Rhodey tries to clean him up quickly so he doesn’t look like such a mess when he sees the kid. He shrugs a blazer on over his T-shirt and jeans, while Rhodey helpes put his hair back where it belongs.
“Peter’s cell phone and suit have both been at the home of Bill and Diane Patterson since he arrived home Thursday night.”
Tony and Rhodey both freeze for a second when they hear those names.
“Peter is still at that house? Even after I called CPS?” Tony asks nervously.
“The case worked submitted a passed home review and a report that the home was suitable and safe for children.” Friday responds in her normal, emotionless tone.
The two men look at each other. “We need to get over there, now.” Rhodey says. As soon as the elevator doors open, they sprinted to Tony’s nearest car and jump in, Tony driving and Rhodey in the passenger seat.
“Friday, have a suit on standby and text Happy to meet us there. Tell him that it’s an emergency.” Tony commands as he speeds out of the garage and towards Queens as fast as he can.
“He’s probably just fine, Tony.” Rhodey reassured him. “He’s lived there for a year and he’s managed. I’m sure he’s okay.”
Tony is so worried he can’t bring himself to respond. If something has happened to his kid, it’ll be entirely his fault.
He pulls up in front of the Pattersons’ apartment building in record time.
Rhodey goes to get out of the car as well, but Tony stops him. “You should wait here, Rhodey.”
“What?! No way!” Rhodey tries to argue. “If Peter’s hurt in there, I’m not just going to sit in here and wait.”
“No, Rhodey, you really need to stay here. Update Happy when he gets here, and wait for my call. CPS cleared these people. We can’t just barge in. They know me. If Peter’s there, I’ll convince them to let me talk to him and then I guess I’ll apologize and beg for forgiveness and see what he says.”
Tony pauses for a moment before getting out his next sentence, which is a little painful for him.
“If he doesn’t want to come with me, I’ll tell him your here and you can take him back to the compound. I won’t leave him with these people again.”
Rhodey looks like he wants to argue more, but he can see the determined look on Tony’s face and drops it. “Okay, man. I trust you. Go get your kid.”
With that, Tony speed walks inside the building and up to the 6th floor where Peter lives as fast as possible. He tries to calm himself down before raising his hand and knocking on the door.