Attention
As is the job of a lady in waiting, Sigyn found herself following Idunn everywhere. She was her companion and attendant and also her confidant. So she got to hear even more about how perfect Loki was. She sat with Idunn in the garden underneath a towering statue of some king of old, their backs against the base. The leaves of crawling vines tickled Sigyn’s neck, but she had to admit, the flowers did smell good. And Idunn fit perfectly among the petals. The aesthetic was completed by the sound of rippling water from the pool on the other side of the stone king.
“-and the way he was twirling his knives, he obviously has skill,” Idunn was gushing. She liked to play with her curls when she was excited or nervous. It seemed she was both as she discussed her feelings. She was pretty, Sigyn had decided. Her blue eyes were startling against all the golden brown and her hair wasn’t the flat bronze Sigyn had thought at first. It was darker than her skin and laced through with golden highlights. Sigyn still wasn’t sure of the girl herself, but she was growing in her.
“Sure.” Sigyn said, “They were showing off, he doesn’t normally do that when he fights.”
“Do you watch him often?” Idunn asked not subtly.
“I try not to. His ego is large enough already.” She smiled a bit, insulting him always put her in a better mood.
Idunn frowned, “You keep doing that, are you allowed to speak about him that way?”
“Technically no, but we’ve had a rivalry since we were eight, so I get a free pass.”
“That’s nice of him,” the girl lamented, “He’s kind too.”
Sigyn had never thought of it like that. She stalled at the reminder that he didn’t have to let her get away with it. She dismissed it, “He’s not, but whatever you want.”
“So you must know him pretty well,” Idunn’s eyes sparkled with excitement, she tugged hard at her curls and ignored Sigyn’s comment.
“I suppose so,” she shrugged, “‘know thy enemy’ and all that.”
“Could you introduce us?” Idunn pleaded, eyes wide and innocent, hands wringing mercilessly at her hair.
She was gonna refuse, she wanted to refuse, but she was sure Loki would find Idunn just as annoying as she did. So as any sensible person would do, she said “I suppose so.”
“Oh thank you Sigyn!” Idunn threw herself upon her, wrapping her in a sudden embrace, “What should I wear? Oh Gods, what should I wear?” she sat back up, suddenly looking worried. Her finger went back up to her hair.
Sigyn pulled it back down with a hand to her wrist, “Stop doing that, you’re gonna go bald. You look fine in your dress.”
“I can’t wear this! What’s his favorite color?” her hands twisted in her lap now that she couldn’t mess with her hair.
“I don’t know,” Sigyn sighed, “black like his soul, green like the snake he is, and gold because he thinks he’s better than everyone else.”
Idunn giggled nervously, “You really don’t like him.”
“I do not.”
Sigyn was pulled roughly to Idunn’s room and made to help her mistress dress up. Idunn wormed into her chosen outfit. Sigyn laced it up. Idunn plopped herself down in front of the vanity. Gold jewelry was put on by the pound over the flowing green dress that was honestly more of a gown. Sigyn could imagine a princess in a dress like this, though not Idunn. Previously she could never have seen Idunn wearing such an unnecessarily deep neckline. She pinned the lady’s hair up with thin gold chains and emerald pins.
“Don’t you think this is excessive?” Sigyn asked her.
“Maybe,” Idunn admitted, “But don’t you think it’s fun?”
“Maybe,” Sigyn admitted. She saw Idunn smile in the mirror.
“You should dress up too.”
“Oh, no, that’s okay,” Sigyn shook her head. She had never dressed up before. She had a single nicer dress but it was by no means a ball gown.
“No no, you have to. It’ll be fun. Then we can do completely ordinary things that are totally inappropriate for the style of dresses we’re wearing and receive weird looks from others.”
Sigyn laughed, “I don’t own any gowns like this.”
“I’ll put you in one of mine,” Idunn replied, “Let’s stick to the Loki theme.”
“Ugh, no. I’m not dressing in any theme that is even slightly related to him.”
Inddunn laughed this time, “Go pick a dress, any one you want.” she batted her away from her hair.
Sigyn stood in the closet and glanced through all the dresses she had helped hang the day before. Every color imaginable was displayed in dress form, from the deepest reds, to the darkest blues. There was no way her lady needed this many dresses for her short stay.
“Oh, wear the gold one!” Idunn appeared at her shoulder.
“I said no Loki.”
“Please! You’d look so pretty in it with your dark hair.”
“Pretty enough?” Sigyn raised an eyebrow. Well she actually couldn’t raise only one, so she raised both. That was one thing she was actually jealous of Loki for and another thing that was absolutely infuriating.
Idunn sighed, “I shouldn’t have said that. It was rude. You’re beautiful Sigyn.”
“Thank you.” she blushed. “I’ll wear the gold dress.” she slid into it and Idunn laced her up. The fabric itself was a light champagne but it was covered in gold leaf and glitter, enough to where she sparkled with every move. The skirts were light and flowy with a slit that traveled all the way to her waist. The bodice technically covered everything it was supposed to but…
“I think someone put holes in your dress,” Sigyn told Idunn, staring at the scraps of skin visible under the gold in the mirror. On Idunn with her dark skin it would be absolutely scandalous.
“No, it’s supposed to look like that. You’re lovely. You’ll have to wear the gold sandals though.”
Sigyn sighed and combed through messy hair, she was gonna go grey before they were done.
“Good idea, do something about that.”
Sigyn couldn’t help a small smile. Maybe she didn’t mind too much.
“We can dance in the rain, and run around the halls, and go to normal dinners in our gowns fit for a coronation,” Idunn was listing excitedly.
“Hair,” Sigyn reminded her just in time. Idunn smiled sheepishly and lowered her hands, “Let’s go.”
The girls giggled as they raced through halls. They giggled at each other for tripping over their long skirts, and they giggled over the strange looks they were in fact receiving. The two ended up back in the garden, balancing on the base of the statue, hanging precariously from the king’s arms over the pool it bordered. The hems of their dresses were soaked and their shoes lay in a pile a few yards away.
“If I get this bodice wet, nothing will be secret anymore,” Sigyn joked. The fabric was so light and there were enough holes already, she may have been joking but the threat was real.
Idunn giggled, “My boob almost fell out when I slipped in the west corridor.” They laughed. Idunn’s laugh was surprising coming from her mouth, Sigyn would have expected a pretty, lady-like bubble, but it was more of a snort. It was contagious though, and she found herself laughing harder because of it.
“Having fun without me?” a voice whispered in her ear, low and mischievous.
Sigyn gasped and fell forward off the statue’s base and towards the pool.
A hand closed around her wrist, leaving her hanging over the water with her toes still on the stone platform. Her skirts were long enough to break the pool’s surface, “Careful,” Loki teased with a smirk. His hand was cold against her skin, “Wouldn’t want to get that bodice wet.” He swung her around and let her drop to solid ground on the other side of the statue.
Sigyn hissed at the impact, “I hate you,” she growled from the ground. Idunn still hung awkwardly from the statue. Loki offered a hand and helped her down, though she got to land on her feet.
“Feeling’s mutual, Love.”
Sigyn frowned. That was new, “What did you say?”
“I said I hate you too.”
“I’m pretty sure you called me love.”
He glared, “So I was trying something new, bite me. I still said I hate you.”
“But see, calling me love afterwards is a little contradictory. Makes me worry that maybe you want me to bite you. Now are you going to help me up, Love?” Sigyn blinked up at him innocently, smiling her own infuriating smile.
He narrowed his eyes at her, “It seems like you’re mocking me, which is absurd because I am royalty and no one would dare-”
“My Lord, I am definitely mocking you.”
“Understood.” He turned away from her to face Idunn, leaving her without a response and without help. Sigyn frowned, that wasn’t supposed to happen. He wasn’t supposed to turn his back on her, but he had and now he was conversing pleasantly with Idunn as though she didn’t exist.
“I suppose you don’t need introductions after all,” Sigyn muttered to herself, standing on her own.
“You look lovely,” Loki was saying. Idunn blushed, “Green is one of my favorite colors and it looks stunning on you.”
Idunn was blushing incredibly hard, her hands reached up to her hair. Sigyn caught her eye and mouthed hands, they were lowered immediately, “that’s why I wore it,” Idunn admitted, “I hoped you’d like it.”
“I do. You know, no one else ever gets dressed up for me. I didn’t even know anyone knew my favorite color.”
Idunn ducked her head shyly, “If I’m being honest, it was Sigyn who told me. She paired each color you liked with some very nice insults.” she smiled teasingly.
“Were they creative?” he asked mildly.
Idunn shrugged, “I’m not sure what your usual standard of insult is. She called you a snake, self centered, and something to do with your soul. Black like your soul I think.”
“I’m flattered. She didn’t happen to mention that she hates me, did she?”
“Only every time I brought you up.”
Loki grinned, “Good.”
They were getting along swimmingly. It was horrible and infuriating. He wasn’t supposed to be enjoying himself, he was supposed to be miserable. Instead, he seemed perfectly happy and it was her fault. Sigyn ground her teeth together. Gods, she hated him. She walked a few paces away and sat down on a bench to wait for her Lady to tire of her conversation. Idunn would never tire of it. Why did she have to like Loki of all people? Loki was a bitch, simply put. A scheming, selfish, clever, infuriating bitch.
“You look nice.”
Sigyn looked up sharply, dragged from her thoughts. There stood the oldest, golden retriever, arrogant, idiotic prince. The shadow Loki lived under. There to her right stood Thor, smiling at her. Sigyn smiled back. If Loki didn’t hate Idunn, he would sure hate her.
“Thank you, Lady Idunn thought it would be fun to get dressed up and do random things.”
“I’m sensing a but,” Thor smiled.
Sigyn chuckled, “but then she ditched me to talk with your brother.”
“Really?” Thor asked, looking slightly confused. He shook it off, “Well Loki is certainly charming when he chooses to be. If they’re busy, maybe I can help this night work out after all.”
Sigyn threw a look over her shoulder at Idunn who was chatting away and at Loki who seemed a little less smug than before.
“Sounds fun, I won’t get in trouble for it will I?”
“No,” Thor shook his head, “Probably not. If you do, I'll say I asked you to.”
Sigyn smiled, “Alright.”
Thor extended his hand, the way Loki should have, and pulled her up from the bench. Sigyn tossed one more look at Idunn, who was still talking, and Loki who was pretending to pay attention. The oldest prince led her from the garden and back into the palace. They walked together through the halls, not saying much. Sigyn didn’t have much to say, and Thor who never seemed to stop talking, apparently didn’t either. They kept to the open air passages that circled the garden.
“You don’t like my brother, do you?” he asked finally.
“Not at all,” Sigyn answered, “Why?”
Thor sighed, “No one seems incredibly fond of him. He hangs around my friends and I, but I know they only tolerate him because of his status as prince and as my brother. Even less now, after the shapeshifting stunt he pulled.”
“But you love him, don’t you?” Sigyn inquired. Know thy enemy.
“Of course I do, he’s my brother. I’d do anything for him.”
“Does he know that?” she didn’t think he did. Or if he did, it wasn’t consciously, it wasn’t enough to keep him smiling. But she knew he loved Thor. He loved his brother more than anything and his opinion meant everything to him. If Thor had reacted to shapeshifting less than kindly, Loki would have taken it hard. She wished there was someone whose opinion meant the world to her. She didn’t care for her mother’s opinion, she only feared her wrath. She was over striving for her approval, she couldn’t be perfect, it wasn’t possible. Not to her mother.
Thor laughed, “Of course he does. How could he not?”
“Maybe it’s a little confusing when you make friends with bigoted jerks like you do,” Sigyn slapped a hand to her mouth. She couldn’t say things like that to him, “No offense, your highness. I’m used to disrespecting your brother without consequence. I need to work on it.”
“No, you’re right.” Thor sighed, “I need to fix it. I mean I did think it was a little weird, but I don’t want people hurting him because of it. He’s a shapeshifter, he shifted his shape.”
“Exactly.”
“You know,” said Thor, “You seem to care an awful lot about his well being for someone who hates him.”
Sigyn glanced out the missing wall and into the gardens and cobblestone below them. The garden was planted in levels, each one a step up. She could see Loki and Idunn speaking by the statue on the highest level, the entrance, even with her and Thor. They stood in the passage overlooking the lowest. The pool began by the statue on the highest level and continued down all the way to the lowest. The water made mini waterfalls over each step down.
“It’s hard to hate someone when you can understand why they're so horrible. I’d like to stop feeling guilty when I go for the throat, so to speak. He feels like an outcast, like he’s loved less. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t rub salt into that wound every now and then, but I still wish it wasn’t there. I do hate him though. He’s infuriating.” He might have been loved less, but at least his father never hit him. At least he didn’t have bruises and handprints carefully hidden away. Maybe he lived in a shadow, but what wouldn’t she do for a little shade. What she wouldn’t give for a shield from her mother’s harsh light and harsher hands. What wouldn’t she give for her mother to be happy again?
Thor grinned, “He talks about you a lot, you know.”
“All bad things, I hope.”
“Every chance he gets.” he assured her.
Sigyn smiled, “Good.”
“So Idunn,” Thor pushed, “You introduced them?”
She sighed, “Yeah. I thought it was a good idea.”
“And it wasn’t?” he asked, watching the people in question as well. They had taken over the bench. Loki lounged against the back of it, one arm on the arm rest and legs crossed lazily out in front. Idunn sat up straight, facing him. Her ankles were crossed and her hands folded in her lap. She was still talking. Sigyn could hear the soft, excited buzz of her voice. If she noticed the barely half attentive nature of Loki she didn’t show signs of it. Sigyn almost felt bad.
“Well maybe it’s working out. For a while he seemed to be enjoying himself, which is obviously nothing I want on my conscience. He doesn’t look so happy now.”
“I think it’s because you’re no longer paying attention to him.”
“He does like to be the center of it.”
They circled back around to the garden entrance and the bench with their subjects of interest. Loki’s eyes clashed immediately with Sigyn’s. They were a sharp piercing green, cold, calculating and impersonal. Idunn continued chattering away, oblivious to the lack of attention she was getting. Sigyn frowned, she hadn’t wanted Loki to enjoy himself, but she still would have liked it if he was at least pretending. For Idunn’s sake.
“Having fun?” Sigyn barely resisted jumping out of her skin at the sound of his voice in her head. His presence was shocking and cold inside her mind. It was certainly a change from the usual heat of her own consciousness. She hadn’t been aware her thoughts had a temperature, but they apparently did. Loki’s mind was freezing, the colors a dark brooding green and black with sharp veins of gold. It looked crystalized and felt sharp and jagged like knives. Occasionally a bright spot of blue would peek through, like shifting marble.
“I thought we had agreed to stay out of each other's heads.” She was half sure part of the pain from when he had taken over as children was from the startling chill.
His lips turned up in a smile, “I remember telling you that I do what I want.”
Sigyn ignored him.“At least pretend you aren’t miserable. She really likes you, despite my counsel against it.”
“I’m not miserable. I’m quite enjoying myself. Might even be in love, who knows.”
“Gross.”
Loki laughed mentally, it tickled the inside of her mind. The cold didn’t hurt this time, it was less invasive and almost soothing. Gods knew she had practically worried through her skull lately, he was a balm to the burn of her inner monologue and she hated it.“If you’re in love you won’t mind if I continue my fun with your brother.”
The ice became harsher, “Not at all.” He broke the connection between their minds and refocused on Idunn. He sat up straighter and turned towards her more dramatically. Despite his best efforts, the knife that appeared twirling over his fingers was a dead give away to his disinterest. She and Thor started another loop.
“Maybe he is enjoying himself,” Thor muttered.
Sigyn glanced back at the other two inhabitants of the area. She tripped in surprise. Thor caught her and set her up right again. He did not let her hit the marble ground. Idunn was no longer talking and Loki was no longer twirling his knife. His hand now tilted her chin upward, she was frozen stock still her eyes wide open at the contact between their lips.
“Damn it.” Sigyn whispered, “Now I’ll have to hear about this non-stop.”
“I feel awkward just watching.” Thor hissed back.
“Then let’s keep walking,” Sigyn pulled him forward. The two were still kissing as they circled back around. This time it was Idunn who met Sigyn’s eyes, hers fluttering back open. She was practically glowing with excitement. Sigyn made a face at her, gross, she mouthed. Idunn rolled her eyes and closed them again. Loki’s cold flooded her mind and Sigyn felt like laughing. Maybe they were kissing, but she had both of their attention.