Wanda woke up with a pleasant ache between her legs, pulling the covers back to be met with a chill in the air. Looking down to notice her own impending nakedness, quickly making last night’s memories flood back. That entirely too familiar fiery red hair was easily noticeable from the corner of her eye. Covering her face as she muttered multiple cuss words that roused the sleeping woman next to her.
“Natasha… this…“ Wanda gestured between the two of them, “Was a mistake… and I can’t let this happen again.” She exclaimed in a rushed tone, nothing like tone she used the night before, trying to avoid a rather awkward conversation. Which only seemed to make things worse when she heard a soft grumble. Jumping out of the bed as she looked around for her clothes- well really anything to keep her eyes off the soft skin of the redhead and those sweet sleep filled eyes.
“Fuck. Yeah, yeah. You’re right. We can’t do this,” Natasha said just as quickly, moving to grab her shirt as well. Eyes drifting to the Sokovian across the room, catching Wanda as she was slipping that dreaded ring onto her finger. Shaking her head as disappointment filled her body. Thinking that maybe the other woman would finally come in her senses, realize that she was not supposed to marry that man, but to be with her instead. Though at this point, Natasha would settle for the brunette to realize that marriage was just not the right thing to do when she was already sleeping with other people, but the sheer panic on the younger woman’s face was enough to understand that this wasn’t going to be that time.
“I need to go. I’ll see you at our dinner, yeah?” Wanda added on after a while, zipping up her jeans before sliding her boots back on. Bending over only exacerbated the throbbing in her head, which was definitely caused by one too many shots from the night before, same reason she had probably fallen into the same bed with Natasha. It absolutely had nothing to do with her feelings, the same ones she had been suppressing for practically years at this point. Never been willing to put herself out there to Natasha in fear of the worse sort of rejection and now it was much more complicated than before. Much too complicated when Wanda had a fiancé waiting for her at brunch.
Natasha watched the younger woman with a stoic expression, not wanting to show just how much it hurt to watch Wanda walk away… again. To go meet a man she couldn’t truly love. “Of course. You know I’d never miss out on your cooking,” She exclaimed as her eyes followed Wanda to the door. “See you then,” She muttered to no one as the sound of the door shutting rang through the silent apartment. Being left alone to sulk in nothingness as the only person she ever truly loved walked out to play house with someone else.
Now all Natasha could do was dwell on the impending shitshow their weekly dinner was going to turn out to be. If things stayed like this, she worried that they could never get back to normal, that they’d always be stuck in a circle of what could’ve been and their undying need for the other. How was she supposed to stand next to the other woman on her wedding night and pretend that she didn’t want to beg for a chance. She couldn’t continue acting like she wouldn’t get down on her knees every night and beg her to change all of it. To have them be the ones standing up there, getting married, but no. Natasha is stuck with being nothing more than the bride’s best friend.
---
Things between them haven’t been normal, but Natasha was truly trying. Trying to fall back into the normalcy that they’ve grown to love over the years. Said trying consisted of their weekly dinner, which meant the redhead was at Wanda’s, who was always happy to cook for the Russian, standing over the stove as she sautéed the vegetables. Natasha was more than content to sit on the island as she watched her favorite person do something she loved. Nights like this were one of the best things for the two of them to do together, doing nothing but chatting and eating as they shared the same space. Though now it was different, an obvious tension in the air as their, what Wanda would call, mistake loomed over them. It wasn’t like the redhead cared too much (she definitely did), calmly sipping at her wine as she watched the Sokovian’s hands shaking slightly. Knowing that her presence put the Sokovian on edge wasn’t a great feeling, but a small part of her loved the power she held in this moment. Wondering if Wanda’s hands were shaking because of the awkwardness or because she was dying for them to make another “mistake.”
Nonetheless, Natasha had to break the tension, keep things as they were, especially if they were going to continue being friends. More importantly, if the Russian still planned to stand next to Wanda at the alter in a dress that matched the other bridesmaids. She wasn’t looking forward to holding Wanda’s bouquet of flowers during the ceremony, but she decided that she could push all feelings aside if it meant her best friend was going to be happy. So the redhead hopped off the counter and walked over to Wanda, standing behind her to watch the food from over her shoulder.
Wanda was very aware of the close proximity, the warm breath against her neck caused her eyes to briefly fall shut. “You know what they say about it being hard to concentrate when someone is breathing down your neck?” The rhetorical question slipped quietly from the brunette’s lips as she did her best to keep preparing the food. Even if now her thoughts were only filled with lewd memories from the other night. Thoughts of roaming hands and deft fingers was enough to cause Wanda to let out a shaky breath, not caring if it was heard by Natasha.
“I think I’ve heard that one once or twice, but I figured that you needed some supervision. Can’t have you ruining the only dinner I really look forward to.”
“I’ve never ruined our dinner’s before.”
“Yeah, but now there’s things that are probably distracting you this time around.” Natasha finished, her voice low, but steady. Deciding that being this close to Wanda was too tempting. That she couldn’t keep her hands to herself when she could smell the Sokovian’s perfume. Her hands fell to Wanda’s hips, gently pulling her closer as her head rests on her best friend’s shoulder.
This wasn’t uncommon for the two of them. They weren’t new to this level of affection, having always been a bit more affectionate than most friends. Always quick to sit next to each other or hold hands in times of distress, even hugging longer than most. This felt different to Wanda, knowing that things had changed. That she knew exactly what Natasha mouth against her most intimate parts felt like. Those thoughts alone were enough to have the brunette shut off the stove before the food was finished.
Natasha recognized the Sokovian’s change in demeanor, reaching up to move brunette hair out of the way before tilting her head to place a trail of kisses starting from Wanda’s shoulder going up to her ear, gently tugging an earlobe between her teeth. “I just can’t stop thinking about you,” Natasha muttered while nudging Wanda’s head to the side with her nose, voice dropping in a way that made Wanda’s knees weak.
Turning around in Natasha’s arms, Wanda was face to face with the older woman. Eyes falling to her older woman’s lips, “We shouldn’t do this again.” Those words were entirely unconvincing, saying them much more to herself than the redhead in front of her, but here she was, ready to fall back into bed with Natasha even if some parts of her were screaming not too.
Wanda wanted this. Wanted it one last time to quell the need inside of her. She knew what she had to lose within doing this, but she was prepared to risk it all simply because Natasha just looked too tempting while standing in front of her. Her hands reached up to wrap around the Russian’s neck, pulling her close to press their lips together. A kiss that spoke words Wanda never had the guts to say. Kissing the older woman gave Wanda a headrush, filled with immediate need as their kiss was now rushed. Tongues brushing against the other as teeth clashed. Her hand tightened within the red hair, pulling her closer as soft moans were being let out. In desperate need of feeling her skin, Natasha’s hands started roaming Wanda’s body, quick to slip underneath her shirt.
“I need you,” Wanda murmured, against Natasha’s lips. Hands falling to unbutton the redhead’s jeans. Not wanting to waste anytime that they had together. Allowing herself to forget about anything else, only thinking about the warm skin and Natasha’s breath hitching; she spun them around. Pressing the older woman’s back into the countertop before slipping her hand inside her underwear. Being met with slick folds, she couldn’t stop the whimper that left her lips, knowing she was just as wet.
Natasha smirked as she watched Wanda’s eyes glaze over with want. Reaching up to take the Sokovian’s jaw within her grip, tilting her head back slightly to ensure there was eye contact as she muttered, “Then touch me like you mean it.”
That was all the permission that Wanda could need, smiling softly as she started to rub the Russian’s clit in hasty circles. Instantly falling for the quiet moans that were spilling from Natasha’s lips. Leaning in to press wet kisses against her neck, Wanda couldn’t help but to bite down rather harshly on the redhead’s neck, needing to leave a mark. Something to see for the next few days, to remind her that this did happen. That it wasn’t just a dream.
Natasha was going crazy, head lulling back as she reached down to push her pants down her legs, easily kicking them off in hopes that Wanda would take advantage of the newfound space. She didn’t have to wait long before the brunette did just that.
Slipping two fingers into the older woman, moving them in a slow, teasing manner. Wanting to savor the feeling of Natasha’s wet, tight walls wrapped around her fingers. Curling her fingers as the redhead tugged Wanda’s hair, pulling Wanda’s mouth closer to her own. Nipping at her bottom lip before sucking it into her mouth, egging on the other woman. “Thought you were going to prove it to me?” Natasha rasped out against her lover’s lips.
Getting exactly what she wanted, Wanda sped up her fingers, groaning deeply as the older woman scraped her fingernails against her scalp. “Is this what you wanted?” Wanda asked, resting her forehead against Natasha’s, “Or this?” She asked with a patronizing tone as she slipped another finger inside, thrusting harder as she watched the redhead’s face contort with pleasure. Natasha let out a whine as her eyes squeezed shut, borderlining on a pathetic sound. “Oh come on. I know you could take it. I thought you needed me to prove it to you?”
“Oh, fuck,” Natasha whimpered, loving it a little too much when Wanda decided to take control. Filling her with those fast, deep thrusts as her other hand gripped her hip tightly.
Wanda was even a bit surprised by her own condescending tone but was quickly distracted by the obscene noises coming from the older woman, easily filling the otherwise quiet space. Keeping Natasha in place against the counter. An action that would normally frustrate the redhead, only seemed to work in their favor as her knees started to buckle. She felt the coil in her stomach tighten, knowing she wouldn’t last much longer as the brunette continued toying with her.
Wanda knew exactly what those sounds meant, having seared them into her mind as she was sure a few nights ago would’ve been the last time she heard them. Tilting her hand just enough to press her palm against her clit, she couldn’t help herself as she leaned in to kiss Natasha. Moans getting muffled within it as Natasha began to lose herself. Mumbled pleas fell from the redhead’s lips before her head fell back. A silent moan fell from her lips as she finally tumbled over the edge, hands clawing at the Sokovian’s back as she did her best to stay upright.
Wanda helped Natasha ride out her orgasm, slowing down her fingers once the redhead’s hips stilled. Pulling her fingers out, the brunette made it a show as she sucked her fingers clean. Earning herself a low groan from the older woman, getting pulled into yet another messy kiss that she could only smile into. Once they broke apart, Natasha was quick to pull on her pants before hoisting the younger woman up.
Wrapping her legs around Natasha’s waist as she was carried to the dining room table. Their kiss continued as she was sat down on the edge of the table, pulling off her shirt before she was pushed to lay back. Natasha tugged down the cup of her bra, leaning down to take a hardened nipple into her mouth, sucking gently.
Wanda was much too needy for all of the teasing, moans tumbling from her lips as she worked to push her leggings down. “’Tasha… Please,” She whimpered, hand tangled within red locks, tugging on it in hopes of getting what she wanted.
Natasha pulled away and looked up, running her thumb across Wanda’s bottom lip and as much as she loved hearing those pleads, she muttered, “Shh. You know that I’ll take care of you.” Watching as the brunette sucked her thumb into her mouth before nodding, giving the older woman the reigns. Natasha smirked, moving to tug those pesky leggings off the rest of the way, underwear coming off with them. Taking a moment to admire the ethereal woman lying in front of her, she let out a groan, committing this exact moment to her memory. Mind filling with an assortment of things she could do to Wanda, she dropped to her knees, not being able to help herself as she placed soft bites across Wanda’s inner thighs. Working her way to the woman’s core before licking up to her clit, finding soaked, sensitive folds. “You’re this wet… Just for me?”
The brunette’s thighs twitched, letting out a gasp as she buried her hands in Natasha’s hair, getting enough strokes of the Russian’s tongue to get riled up, but not enough to get her anywhere. “Just for you,” She whimpered, not truly understanding the weight of her words, but knowing it was a rather convoluted statement. Pulling Natasha’s face back to her core, she carefully started grinding once her tongue reached her clit, yet again.
The older woman sucked the Sokovian’s clit into her mouth, easily slipping two deft fingers inside of her. Fingers moved at a fast pace as Wanda cried out, back arching off the table, hands finding her own breasts.
“I’m the only one that can make you feel this good. He doesn’t touch you like this, does he?” Pathetic moans were music to the redhead’s ears, chest filling with pride as her fingers thrusted harder. Watching as Wanda’s writhed beneath her, eyes tracing the lines of her hipbones, wishing she had a camera to capture the woman’s true beauty within this moment. “Don’t marry him, Wands. Just be with me.”
Natasha’s purposefully curated words caused Wanda to let out a cry, legs clamping down against the hand between them, but it didn’t stop the older woman from continuing those perfect thrusts. The words that left Natasha’s mouth had only worked to send the Sokovian much closer to her orgasm, feeling that blinding pleasure build inside of her. “K-keep talking,” She whined, getting off on knowing just how much Natasha wanted to be with her.
“You don’t love him. Not like you do me. I could give you so much more.”
Wanda nodded in agreement, having been thrown straight into that mind-numbing, burning pleasure. Finally letting herself fall over the edge, orgasm hitting as she threw her head back and arched up towards Natasha. Repeating older woman’s name like a prayer. Once those waves of pleasure finished their course through her body, looking ruined as ever, she locked eyes with Natasha. Catching onto that gleam of hope that shot through them. She pulled her lover down and kissed her intensely, needing this kiss to convey all the things she wanted to say. Hoping it would be enough to placate the woman above her. Natasha was the one to pull away, quick to grab the younger woman’s clothes, handing them to her before walking away in search for some water.
Being laid across the table, in her post orgasm state, Wanda’s mind fell back to the words Natasha had spoken. The proposition the Sokovian had covered up with a kiss and too many moans to count. When Natasha was on top of her the thought of having her made Wanda brave, made her ready to face the world, but without the redheads hands on her body, everything that she was afraid to lose came rushing back to her mind. All of it was too much, now feeling as if her head was spinning from more than just the mind blowing orgasm. She felt torn in two as she lifted her hand up to look at her ring finger, sitting up only to catch eyes with Natasha, who was sporting a much too laid back smile. A smile that usually caused her heart to ache from how gorgeous it was, to now only causing heartache.
There was a confidence extruding from Natasha, like she had gone through this exact conversation in her head multiple times. Like there was no way Wanda could possibly say no to such a charming smile. Making it seem as if choosing the brunette was the easiest decision in the world. Almost as if all the other things Wanda had to consider meant absolutely nothing simply because Natasha was choosing Wanda.
Seeing the conflict pass through the Sokovian’s eyes was enough to have the redhead fixing her clothes. Straightening out her shirt and buttoning her pants before speaking, “About what I said… Just think about it.” The same smile still graced her lips as if she already knew Wanda’s answer. Almost like the ‘yes’ would be as easy as Natasha’s confession. Nonetheless, she allowed the younger woman to get herself together as she turned to finish up the dinner for them.
Wanda couldn’t find any words to fill the air, choosing to nod dumbfoundedly as she felt as if she was glued to the table. Her eyes watched the redhead as she walked back to the kitchen. Words still failing her even as she wanted to scream for Natasha to stay, to help her figure it all out, to make it easy for her, even to just help quiet the thoughts for one measly moment.
They were everything the other needed, but Wanda just wasn’t sure how to see it.
--
Dinner had come and gone with very few words. Too many things were swimming through Wanda’s head, making it hard to even function as a normal person around the one person she could always be herself around. At this point there wasn’t anything keeping Natasha there any longer, setting down the last dry dish, she turned to the brunette, “I’m going to head out. It’s late and I think you need some time to think about things.”
Wanda nodded, not having much to say as she followed Natasha to the front door, but before she could actually walk out, she caught the Russians wrist. “I’ve thought about what you said earlier,” She started, both loving and hating the glint of hope that filled Natasha’s eyes. “I’m still going to marry Vision.”
Natasha wasn’t sure why she had thought this had changed things. She couldn’t understand why she had excepted Wanda to choose her. To give up everything she had built with Vision, but despite feeling her heart ache in the worst ways possible, she couldn’t help but to want to comfort the younger woman as she watched Wanda wrap her arms around herself. The thing that she did when she needed a sense of comfort that no one else could give to her, except this was different. Natasha was normally that means of comfort. “Just tell me why.”
The silence that fell between the two was something new, something different, nothing like it had been during dinner. This silence was earth shattering. Tense enough to finally cause that familiar lump to form in Wanda’s throat. She had thought about it, long and hard during their almost silent dinner, but nothing had prepared her for this moment. To see that light dim within Natasha’s eyes and that confident smile, settle into a sad frown. “I can’t risk losing you as my best friend, Natasha. You’ve been that constant in my life for too long. Adding anything more to this would put everything that we have at risk. There’s too much to lose with you and he’s- he’s safe.” Wanda muttered, voice breaking at the end. Quickly wiping away the tear that fell down her cheek.
“You’ve always gone from one thing to another so fast and that’s eventually going to be me. I trust you with my life, ‘Tasha… but I- I can’t trust you with my heart.” Wanda finished, a sad smile gracing her lips, almost as if something so small would soften the hurt that her words caused. It killed her to watch the realization wash over Natasha’s face, which was only masked with a blank stare after a moment. The hundreds of walls that the Sokovian had broken over the years had been built back up within seconds, like all their time together meant nothing. Their lasting friendship was now absolutely nothing. She reached out, trying to close the ever-growing distance between them, only to have Natasha take a step back with a shake of her head.
“Don’t.” Natasha said, her voice flat as if any emotion would be too much to bear within that moment. “I don’t think this is what you really want. I think you’re choosing the easy way out, but I need be okay with it. I clearly can’t change your mind.” She added, shaking her head in disbelief.
“Natasha, please…”
“I won’t... I can’t be there when you get married. Not after all of this.” Natasha cut Wanda off, turning around to leave. Slamming the door shut in the Sokovian’s face as she left Wanda there in tears. Not staying to pick up the pieces for what would be the first time and the last time.
--
Days turned into weeks of no contact. Natasha taking it upon herself to ignore every call, voicemail, and text, knowing she wouldn’t be able to handle another rush of emotions. She was miserable, although she would never admit it. She was never the kind to rely on anyone else making her feel whole. Never relying on anyone until Wanda, but Wanda had tilted the Russian’s world on its axis the moment she laid eyes on the brunette. Always remembering how Wanda’s accent washed over her like warm honey or how those green eyes could instantly see through all the Russian’s facades. Even now, while wallowing in self-pity and thinking of all the ways things could’ve been different, she’d still admit that the day they found one another would always be the best thing that happened.
No matter how hurt Natasha was, nothing could ever take away from what they had. It wouldn’t just erase the ways Wanda always used gentle hands with every piece of Natasha. Never finding any room for judgement no matter how dark things got. It couldn’t take away from the fact that the Sokovian never strayed away. Never lost that tender look in her eye. It was the purest thing Natasha had ever been graced with.
So she sat on her couch with a bottle of vodka in hand, ready to drown out the sorrows of knowing that it was Wanda’s wedding day. The day where everything becomes final. She thought about making an appearance, maybe putting on that dreaded matching bridesmaid dress and showing up to fulfill her duties as maid of honor, but she knew better. So she thought that maybe she could show up just to stand in the back. Be there for some kind of moral support, not wanting to let years of their friendship go right down the drain, but again, she knew better. Fully aware of the fact that it would break her heart even further to watch the happy couple make it all official. She ended up settling on watching Moonraker in the company of her now warm vodka and a bowl of ice cream. She hoped that it would fix all the immediate problems. Hoping to no longer feel the devastation as the liquor started to course through her blood.
Groaning when she heard the knock on her door, having half a mind to throw the bottle at the door, wanting to make whoever it was go away. Deciding against that, she pressed pause on her movie before trudging to the door. Opening it up, she was met with Wanda standing there, green eyes glassy with tears starting to pool. Wearing the same white dress that she helped the Sokovian pick out months ago. Mouth agape as words failed the redhead, getting lost within the beauty and not believing what she was seeing, but she was sure that she had really had *that* much to drink.
“Picture this, I’m standing at the altar, ready to say, “I do,” but when the time came to say it, I couldn’t,” Wanda said through her tears, followed with a pathetic little chuckle. Almost as if she couldn’t believe what she was doing. “They were all just staring and waiting for me to speak, but I just couldn’t get you out of my head. Your smile and laugh… just all of it. Today should’ve been the best day of my life, where things finally fell into place and all the happiness ready to overflow, but instead I started crying. Telling him that I was sorry, but it should’ve been you. It’s always been you, ‘Tasha. I just… wanted you. So here I am, standing at your door, in a wedding dress, ready to beg you to give me a chance. To make all of this right so we can finally have our chance.” She sniffled when she was done, praying to the universe that she hadn’t already fucked this up, hoping that Natasha still wanted her.
Natasha stood there in shock, letting all of the words truly sink in. Wanda didn’t go through with her marriage. Wanda was here for Natasha. Wanda wanted to give them a chance. Wanda wanted to be with Natasha. Wanda. A wide, shit eating grin spread over the Russians lips. Reaching out to grab the brunette’s wrist before tugging her inside, “I would be crazy to say no to something I’ve wanted for so long,” she muttered, cupping Wanda’s cheeks as she used her thumbs to wipe the tears away. “But you need to be sure. I can’t- I can’t go through this again.”
“This is what I want… You’re what I want. I was confused and- and scared so I chose the easy route, but you were right. I didn’t love him. Not in the ways I do you. I needed that push and standing at my own wedding, looking at someone who wasn’t you just wasn’t right.”
“You really mean that? You aren’t going to wake up in the morning and regret walking away?”
It hurt, hearing Natasha question everything, but Wanda couldn’t be offended by it. It was only fair, especially after everything she said to the redhead. Wanda meant what she said. She was prepared to drop to her knees and grovel as long as it meant the older woman would give her at least a chance to show how much she truly meant it all.
“Every morning since you walked out of my house, I wanted absolutely nothing more than to wake up next to you. I think the only regret I have about any of this is not letting it happen sooner. Not allowing myself to love you in all the ways you’ve deserved,” Wanda worked to explain herself better, to try to quell those nagging thoughts that were sure to be racing through Natasha’s mind. She reached up, tangling her hands in those perfectly familiar red locks, pressing their foreheads together. “I want you more than anything. We can finally be happy… Together.”
Natasha had her eyes shut, soaking in all the words the brunette had to say. Deciding that she was done fighting herself, done listening to the parts of her mind that was still telling her to push those feelings to the side. She decided that she wanted to let go. To get the chance at having something great with the woman she had spent years pining over. This was everything she had ever dreamt of and even the largest of reservations couldn’t stop her from nodding her head in agreement. “Please just kiss me now.”
Wanda smiled widely, more than happy to oblige to the very simple and pleasurable request. Something she’s wanted to do for weeks now. Leaning in, their lips finally met and for the first time the kiss wasn’t rushed, allowing themselves the time to indulge. Letting the kiss say everything they’ve always held back, and in that moment, they both realized that they were everything the other needed, but this time, Wanda finally saw it.